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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

Unable to see my baby in NICU due to covid restrictions

317 replies

francesca26 · 03/01/2022 06:11

I feel so alone I needed to post this to see if anyone else has been or is in a similar situation.

I have been in hospital since 30/12 for a scheduled induction. The process didn't start until 31/12 due to how busy they were and I was on a ward with several other women. One of these women tested positive for covid on 31/12 just as my contractions started and I was informed that I had been 'exposed'. I didn't think too much of it at this point and was just focusing on birthing my baby.

At 17.57pm on 01/01/22 my son was born at 38+4 . He had breathing difficulties and was 'grunty' so was taken straight to NICU, I had a brief cuddle but hardly any skin to skin.

The NICU doctor then informed me that because I had been 'exposed' that I would not be able to visit my son in NICU at all, even though I was testing negative. 💔

It has now been over 24hrs since I gave birth and I have had no contact with my baby. I have been put in a segregated room on the post natal ward. I'm not allowed to leave and can't have any visitors.

My heart is honestly breaking. I also have a 2 year old at home who I haven't seen for 4 days now.

Baby is improving and although he is still on oxygen, the levels are much better than they were. However I've not got any time frame on when they think he will be able to be moved up to post natal and be with me.

I feel like this is really affecting my mental health. I know my baby is in the best place but I am being treated like I have covid, even though I am negative and double jabbed.

I just don't know what to do with myself. I'm stuck in this room, without either of my children and I can't leave unless I discharge myself which they have advised me not to do incase baby is able to move up at some point.

😢💔

OP posts:
Greyrootszerohoots · 03/01/2022 07:09

Heartbroken for you OP, please do complain when you can. The pandemic has gone on for 2 years, provisions should have been made by now to keep mothers and newborns together in cases like yours.

Neurodiversitydoctor · 03/01/2022 07:09

As I said in my original post, I understand that baby's in NICU are incredibly vulnerable but my baby is in a side room, because of the fact I was exposed! So I would be in the room with just him if they allowed me to go.

Well this makes even less sense they won't let you inI'm so sorry. I would speak to them again and ask them to explain exactly why. If your partner can go in with negative LFTs I don't understand why you can't

I think this is going to be my last post on this thread, I have every sympathy with OP it must be horrible. In response to above if OP and baby could be together in a side room then that would probably be ok (worth asking about this OP if you are medically fit for discharge) but she cannot go from a red area (her room) through the NICU to the babies room and back many times a day. Wherever she is she needs to stay there to prevent transmission. If she is completely medically fit should could potentially "move into" the babies side room but only if it had it's own bathroom and she wouldn't be able to come out for meals etc. Infection control is a complete nightmare in hospitals atm

MimiDaisy11 · 03/01/2022 07:10

What a horrible situation! It’s frustrating as if they would give a time frame for when you could have the baby with you that’d be something but to just have it as a possibility would be so annoying.

I think I’d be going mad stuck in a hospital room for days and would be tempted to leave if it was affecting my mental health. At least then you’d be at home with your 2 year old and husband.

Thingstodotoday · 03/01/2022 07:10

@falalalalalalablahblah do you have experience working in NICU and a post-grad in attachment? 🙄

Neurodiversitydoctor · 03/01/2022 07:11

OP should certainly be given the opportunity to provide breast milk, I'd be astounded if she wasn't.

Roselilly36 · 03/01/2022 07:12

I feel really sorry for you OP, of course pictures & FaceTime aren’t enough, you need to be with your baby, it’s sounds cruel to me. Big hugs Flowers

KiloWhat · 03/01/2022 07:14

@Neurodiversitydoctor ahh thank you for explaining. Mumsnet is great, so many people with experience on here.

I imagine there aren't many spare spaces available either so must be hard juggling everyone.

canubeliveit · 03/01/2022 07:15

I would be raising hell, the hospital has had 2 years to come up with solutions to this situation. I am so sorry OP.
Omicron is so widespread at the moment, we are all being exposed all the time. Other visiting parents and staff will also have been exposed without doubt. I can't even get my head around this OP I'm so sorry.

Perpop · 03/01/2022 07:15

This is heartbreaking, I’m so sorry.

StillNo · 03/01/2022 07:16

If OP were to be infectious she could infect a whole shift, which wouldn't happen by them "living their lives" outside of work. It's horrible for OP but a reasonable precaution.

It is absolutely NOT a reasonable precaution and the hospital have no right to do this.
They have the option of allowing visits but treating both mother and baby as positive. So private room and barrier nursing.
Not allowing a mother to see her newborn baby is criminal.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this OP.

Neurodiversitydoctor · 03/01/2022 07:23

It is absolutely NOT a reasonable precaution and the hospital have no right to do this.
I am sorry but "the hospital" can put any stipulations they see fit on vistors and visting hours. OP has the right to discharge herself and her baby (although obviously highly inadvisible if baby is on oxygen). The entitlement on this thread is mindblowing(go to PALS, make a formal complaint)- I bet you were all out clapping on a Thursday night last year, but cooperating with health services who I can assure are just doing the best they can in an incredibly difficult situation- not so much.

Flowers again OP I really do hope you can get your new born snuggles very very soon. None of this is directed at you.

lettshaveaniicecupoftea · 03/01/2022 07:23

Ffs this is horrendous, senseless and unnecessary.
If your baby is in a side room there is absolutely no reason to keep you apart.

I would be making a holy show until they let me see my baby.

This is a prime example of rules overriding common sense and doing the right thing. You could wear a mask and ppe, not get too close to the cot and only go in when staff are not in the room. They should try and work around it so mothers and babies have some contact. Especially when the mother doesn't actually have covid.

Summerfun54321 · 03/01/2022 07:23

Phone and email PALS repeatedly until you get an answer you’re happy with. You have to advocate for yourself here and continuously kick up a huge fuss. Threaten to sue if you have to and start making notes of your conversations. Being apart from your newborn for a week is outrageous in the current covid climate of very few rules. So anyone can go clubbing or to a busy shop and restaurant then visit your baby but you as the mother can’t?!!

Oblomov22 · 03/01/2022 07:28

This is really bad. Isn't there something that can be done here?

Neurodiversitydoctor · 03/01/2022 07:28

Phone and email PALS repeatedly until you get an answer you’re happy with. You have to advocate for yourself here and continuously kick up a huge fuss. Threaten to sue if you have to and start making notes of your conversations. Being apart from your newborn for a week is outrageous in the current covid climate of very few rules. So anyone can go clubbing or to a busy shop and restaurant then visit your baby but you as the mother can’t?!!

I rest my case. There won't be anyone in the PALS office on a bank holiday. By the time this is actioned the OP will be out of isolation and/or the baby will be well enough to join her. But why not sue the trust ? it's not like the NHS has anything better to do ?

eurochick · 03/01/2022 07:29

This is awful. It is the fault of the hospital's procedures that you were exposed in the first place. I had a baby in nicu and it was so hard not being with them all the time. I can't imagine how tough this must be for you.

OnceuponaRainbow18 · 03/01/2022 07:29

Oh OP what an awful situation, I’m so sorry this is happening.

As baby is in a side room seems mad you can’t go and visit, I would push. This is in humane. You could wear a mask of you need to walk through the rest of NICU. Keep asking, ask to speak to the manager, they can’t keep you away from your new born like this.

pollyparrot45 · 03/01/2022 07:29

I don't think other people starting arguments on the thread is going to be helpful for the OP. Please stop.

OP I've been there. Although not covid related. My son went to NICU & I was too poorly not to leave the ward. Thankfully it was only 17 hours.

My son was also grunting and on oxygen and he did 48hrs on NICU. This will be over for you soon.

My baby was released from NICU earlier than planned onto a transitional care ward which was a higher dependency than post natal so we could be together as I was breastfeeding. Can you ask the hospital if there is a similar ward? It might be that they can manage his work oxygen here with you.

You don't need me to explain how desperately sad it is as you're living it and I'm sorry. I spent all my time expressing and the midwife's delivered it. This helped me feel connected to the baby and like I was still mothering him.

It was horrific but we were okay in the end and I was attached to him. Perhaps you could ask them to give him a Muslin cloth and you have one and then swap them so he can smell you and vise Versa.

rubyglitter · 03/01/2022 07:29

Are you negative? It is so cruel to separate a parent from their baby. The world is dystopian. What is the point in the tests and vaccine if you still have to isolate? Surely a negative test is the best indicator that you’re well (unless you have symptoms and are coughing up your guts)?

OnceuponaRainbow18 · 03/01/2022 07:29

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OnceuponaRainbow18 · 03/01/2022 07:30

Ps my friend works in ICU with the most vulnerable and goes even when she’s a close contact

Neurodiversitydoctor · 03/01/2022 07:33

I don't think other people starting arguments on the thread is going to be helpful for the OP. Please stop.

Agreed, luckily most baby's who are in NICU have similar outcomes to yours. I am sure in a week OP and her baby will be at home together both fit and well.

Neurodiversitydoctor · 03/01/2022 07:34

Ps my friend works in ICU with the most vulnerable and goes even when she’s a close contact
That is not my experience, but perhaps trusts vary.

Summerfun54321 · 03/01/2022 07:35

@Neurodiversitydoctor drs are always so heartless and medical when it comes to childbirth and the treatment of mothers. I’m so glad we have midwives running the show in the U.K. Read the OP’s update, she’s been told 10 days now not 7 so your comment is false.

Hawaiiinthemorning · 03/01/2022 07:35

What the fuck is a picture going to do???? This is beyond ridiculous now, absolutely inhumane.