With the best intentions, and no disrespect, do you feel woman that have c-sections havent 'properley given birth'?

[CharlotteACavatica]

Do you ever feel you think that way even if you dont mean to??

Nope, i dont understand. Unless the birth natural or not, ended with a tragic result i cant see why so many are so sensitive about it.

Message withdrawn

Charlotte - you didnt say that in the the op tho did you? Perhaps a better worded thread saying along the lines of 'I had 2 cs and dont feel like i have given birth' THen talk about your experience. Perhaps then other mums who experience or feel similar could then share your views.

How you started the thread was not tactful and putting in I mean no disrespect does not automatically make it respectful.

Many people are VERY sensitive about issues surrounding pregnancy, birth, feeding, parenting - the whole lot. You only need to spend ONE day on MN to find that out I am sure.

I'll ask again - what exactly have I missed out on by not having had a vaginal birth?

Haychee ... I actually think I can expect people to demonstrate sensitivity on a parenting site

to the OP prefacing your title with phrases which mean 'I don't wish to offend but' demonstrates you are aware that this could be a sensitive subject. If you then go on to phrase your title and OP insensitively you surely can't expect people to not be pissed off by the crassness. Much as you were offended when I borrowed your 2 phrases and added an f off

Ive actually found that on mn, people share advice on birth, pregnancy, feeding etc etc. I dont find people being overly sensitive about those issues at all.

ok

these are my thoughts.

birth, is not just a few hours or a few days out of your life.

it is a defining moment for many women,

it can have a massive impact on you, positive or negative.

it can affect your mental and physical wellbeing, aswell positively or negatively.

it brings your children into the world, which is a huge deal.

it can make you challenge your own perceptions of yourself as a woman, wife, friend, partner

birth can and does have an enormous impact on womens lives

get a group of women together, with children, and even if they don;t know each otehr, within a short space of time, they will have shared birth stories.

it can challenge your relationship with your partner and your parents

it changes you evermore

well, that is my experience, my thoughts and i am probably not alone

i

There are alot of women in the world, and alot of women come on here, i have encountered some woman that have there opinions on this subject and as i said before some of them are ok about it and share there experiences, but some of them do feel they have one over on you if they have managed a vaginal delivery (not my words originally by the way, before you all start off with your blood pressure again) i titled this thread depicting how some people have brought it up with me before! I really cant see how anyone can be offended by it!

Have had emergency SC and two VBAC. Couldn't give a damn what anyone else thinks about how I gave birth, nor how anyone else did. Just very thankful to have 3 beautiful healthy DC and to have got through it myself.
Why would anyone pass judgement on someone's else's birth FGS?

pmsl, umm - no. I actually think they have been through so much MORE than me, not only have they had major adominal surgery, but they probably laboured long and hard before they got to that point.

If that is the case why start the thread off wiht a poxy one liner? I think that you didnt actually think through properly what you were saying or were just trying to be inflammatory. That or you simply lack social etiquette (sp).

re the OP

Christ, I never gave birth! And there was me thinking the extra poundage was middle aged spread! 10 years down the line, and the little devil is still in there!

So who was the child I dropped of at school this morning and who was her brother I wonder.........

Awen, your spelling is fine.

except the with

That is the keyboards fault for not keeping up with you.

so i did sugar!

it is an interesting and worthwhile debate, and a lot less inflammatory than the initial op and title portrayed.

Message withdrawn

I had an emergency c-s after a failed induction lasting 72 hours induction - my baby/pregnancy was high risk and dd was having to be born 3 weeks early.

NEVER have I thought that I had an inferior delivery - I just thank whoever that we have the knowledge and skills to carry out c-secs if necessary and that in the main we have the knowledge and skills to do this with a minimum of risk.

If there's a next time, I would ideally like a VBAC but this is due to the fact I'd rather not have major surgery if I can avoid it and be up and 'running' quicker.

However, several times I have come across people who have said to me whilst pregnant, I hope my baby stays breech so I can have a c-section so a lot of people still do think them an easy option. Lets face it - when it comes to childbirth there is no easy option.

Ok, agreed it is a sensitive subject, but not that sensitive that the op deserved such a thrashing. I still dont read her op as, "if youve had a section then your dc arent real" its "do you feel youve missed out on anything, been deprived of something"

Right - got hormone/stress under control now and have read a little of the thread, not just the OP.

Initially, I would just like to say, "Lulumama is all wise and knowing - listen to the woman."

I was told at about 25 weeks not to expect to give birth naturally and was devastated - DD is my first (and sadly only) child and I had envisaged a lovely water birth and a six hour discharge - DH was summoned home to look after me by the midwife I was so distraught.

Over the next few weeks I had a few comments along the line of the OP's thread title. They came from suprising sources (even being asked if Iwas too posh to push) and I can also say that the support came from suprising sources also. About ten weeks before DD was born I got to chose her birthday and we prepared ourselves for B-day.

I can honestly say that my daughter's birth was amazing, with DH having skin-to-skin with DD and the theatre staff were wonderful, BUT if I had seen this thread in the months leading up to her birth I would have been very very upset.

My main concern with this thread title and OP is that if anyone is about to have to undergo and elective CS or has recent undergone an emergency CS and is at all upset about it - then the title will make them feel worse.