Getting a bit upset by other people's comments

[LisaSimpsonsbff]

I'm nearly 32 weeks pregnant, so maybe over-reacting due to hormones! Recently I've had a few comments about childbirth from friends - all along the lines of 'I'm absolutely never going to have a vaginal birth - I'll have a C-section' (none of them have ever given birth). This has all come with comments about 'ruined vaginas', etc. I know I should ignore these not particularly well-informed comments (though one of them was a doctor!), but I also keep seeing comments on Mumsnet (admittedly, I'm sure these are sticking out for me because it's something on my mind) basically suggesting that all women should have elective caesareans, too. The thing is, it's not even like anyone would even agree to give me an elective C-section - no medical indications, and while I'm scared of giving birth that's just in a normal way, not tokophobia - so it's not a decision I have to make, but these comments just keep going round and round my head. I've also had a few comments saying I should immediately ask for an epidural (some of these ones are from women who have given birth), and although I'm totally open to that if I need it, that's also not my ideal plan. I don't really know what I'm looking for here - maybe reassurance that I'm not a totally naive idiot? I'm really not a 'candles and I'll just breathe the baby out' idealistic first-time mother - as I said, I'm terrified and fully expecting it to be painful and horrible, but people keep (completely unsolicitedly! I haven't brought up the topic of childbirth in conversation once!) making me feel like I'm doing something stupid.

My first was an emergency section. I was quite ill, had an infection and felt depressed for about six months. I fought for a normal delivery for baby 2 and although a much larger baby after changing Consultant I delivered a 9lb 3 oz baby and was up the street shopping three days later. Baby 3 & 4 delivered too. Baby 3 I went home the next morning. Yet after baby 1 I was told I would never have a normal delivery because I had a small pelvis.
What will be will be.
I hope you have a good delivery.

Oops just saw it was an old thread.

Congratulations on your lovely baby boy.

I've had 3 vaginal births, with only slight grazing. All with only gas and air right at the end. Contractions are worse than the actual delivery but by far not the worst pain I've felt. My cousin has had 2 c sections and was in a lot worse shape than me. Ignore these idiots who haven't even had a baby so have no knowledge of what it's actually like. And (as far as I'm aware) my nether regions are still perfectly acceptable...well at least my husband tells me so!

Well done OP.

I hope your friends are being less knobby now!

Thanks, bower and preggosaurus!

Unlike while I was pregnant, my friendships have all returned to their status quo where we do not discuss my vagina, so I haven't actually had the chance to tell all them that it survived more or less intact...