So...can anyone tell me what the pain is really like?

[Fishpond]

General terms like 'bad, terrible, god-awful' are not really memory-inducing. I'm trying to equate it with some type of pain I could relate to.

Does the pain increase every hour / contraction?
What type of pain are the contractions vs. transition vs. crowning vs. pushing?
Do epidurals really eliminate all the pain? (We don't have G&A or pethidine here, epidural is the only way to go if I want pain relief)
Episiotomy?
Stitches afterward?
Delivery of the placenta?
Most painful bit?

I'm bricking it a bit

I didnt get to pushing etc but labour i can actually remember quite vividly. Contractions started as a bad period pain but it really does 'wave' so its more like a pulsing rather than the constant ache of a period. Contractions do get worse with time but its the intensivity and length that makes them worse.

I can only liken it to when you have an upset stomach really bad. You know the times when you're pooing and you stop then you think oh no, more, and you cant control it it just comes out and your whole body tenses with it. Sometimes to the point that your sick at the same time. Its really similar, i suppose as peristalsis is what moves food etc along your gut, your womb does a similar action pushing baby out. I had back to back labour and so i begged for an epidural. Contractions were managable but truly my back felt like my spine was cracking.

Epidural didnt work for me. It dulled the pain slightly but i was still on gas and air with it. I didnt get to pushing etc as had an emcs but hope i've conveyed the pain for you.

None of it is as bad as having your bikini line waxed. That's my experience - and I'm being quite honest. Both my 2 with no pain relief whatsoever. Different for everyone ...

Have you ever had really bad gastro-enteritis? Where is feels like the entire world is falling out of your arse...and you just can't get away from the constant pain, can't get comfortable no matter what you do...

That's what it was lke for me.

Except with gastro-enteritis the only way out I could see was death, and with labour I knew it would end with a baby (although death did cross my mind!)

My labours were short and intense, no break between contractions. Loads of pressure from the very start (especially with ds as waters didn't break). One contraction would start to ease off and another would roll in ontop of it. Transition was no more painful, but this is where i started to think dying was the way out.

Crowning felt lke being ripped from arse to clitoris.

Afterwards I was exhausted and felt like I'd been hit by a bus, everything hurt.

BUT I did it all on 2 paracetamol with dd and nothing at all with ds so it really can't have been totally unbearable.

(have perhaps been too honest here)

I've broken my foot and walked round on it for 4wks without knowing....

Labour, well, let me preface this with two facts: one, my waters broke prematurely both times so I did labour with no cushioning; two, both of my babies were malpositioned to the point that I had an emcs with both. 31hrs post rupture of membranes with dd, 38hrs with ds. It was NOT straightforward but I'll share anyway because it's one experience on a vast spectrum.

I wanted to die and genuinely believed that I would. I couldn't at all accept that you could be in that much pain for that long and survive. Contractions with dd were 2.5 minutes long with a 30 second gap for the duration. They hurt as much at the beginning as they did at the end and they hit like a train each time. No peak, no slow build up. Everything hurt. My teeth, my hair, my eyeballs. I was an incoherent mess. I have never forgotten the pain.

The epidural both times was like winning the lottery, getting David Mitchell naked and rainbows dancing across my eyeballs. I would have given that anaesthetist my soul, my kidney and the roof over my head.

Two bits of advice. One- you don't choose the labour you get and you neither succeed nor fail. Two- do not be a fricking idiot like me thinking that you MUST do this naturally or else. Take the drugs fgs. If you need to, do it. The good bit comes afterwards and if you can approach that intact and not sobbing and traumatised through pain then why the hell not?

Yes, epidurals do get rid of all the pain: it is fantastic relief. Also, they allow you to relax, which might speed things up (well, that was my feeling, anyway), and even if they don't, you can at least rest.

Don't worry about not having G&A: for many people it does not work and for many others it does not get rid of the pain, it just distracts you enough so that you do not care.

No comment on the rest...

Actually that's a lie, I did use tens for a bit with ds

See Showy labour without waters for me was so much more comfortable than labour with waters intact, the pressure was awful with waters intact and it was a relief once they broke them for me. Again shows how different it is for everyone

Exactly Freakoid and I have no basis for comparison as I've never laboured with waters. I have been reassured by my consultant that the level of pain was exacerbated by the lack of cushioning and a severely malpositioned baby. My excuse and I'm sticking to it. The idea that it could have been in any way worse is too bloody awful to contemplate.

Does the pain increase every hour / contraction? No, not at all

What type of pain are the contractions vs. transition vs. crowning vs. pushing?

With ds1, fairly different. With ds2, I thought 'maybe if I push a bit on the next contraction the waters may break'. I did, and the baby shot out, so no difference at all.

Do epidurals really eliminate all the pain? (We don't have G&A or pethidine here, epidural is the only way to go if I want pain relief) Didn't have one

Episiotomy? Neither

Stitches afterward? No

Delivery of the placenta? With ds1, it popped out. With ds2, had fairly painful afterpains and then delivered it.

Most painful bit? ds1 - crowning, probably. but more than pain I remember exhaustion (long labour)
ds2 - the afterpains (v. short labour).

Overall, I would say it is by no means the worst pain I have experienced. Having a kidney infection was much, much worse (and lasted longer and didn't leave me with a baby!)

I didn't get any breaks in pain from about 4cms. It felt constantly excruciating, and about all that I could say to my Mum was, "I thought there were supposed to be breaks in the pain!" (but the contractions increased the pain to a different level so I did know when they were coming and going). It was not like any pain I have ever experienced (not had a broken bone before). The epidural did really get rid of the pain and it was fantastic, but I had it too late. You need to have it around 4cm NOT 9cm. Some people don't get a lot of pain, or just some back ache.

Contractions were like a wide metal band / belt being tightened across your stomach.

Near the end, totally out of control as in just gave myself over to the experience. I thought I'd be shy and self-conscious about it, but there seems to be a point at which a marching band could come in the room and you really wouldn't give a toss!

Not "the worst pain ever!" as some people told me. It hurts but you know WHY and what its all for. I think it would be worse to be trapped in a ravine and have to cut off your own arm ;-) It will be okay and it will end!

For me the contractions are manageable but once my waters break the contractions are stronger. I also found the contractions to get things back in place after birth more painful and no-one told me about them !

Also - I had an epidural which was fantastic. I felt everything pushing but it no longer hurt. Also took away the fear of the pain getting worse. I think the fear of the unknown, makes it difficult.

Completely different for every woman and even for each birth. In general terms, labour pains are like the worst period pains you've ever had but multiplied by 200. Birth pain is like a tight burning sensation 'down there'.

Started out very mildly (in comparison) and was dealt with by the TENS and rocking on the ball. After a very long latent period I needed to rest but the ctx were waking me up every 20 mins or so. After about 50 hours of this I was still only 2cm dilated then waters broke and, wow, what a difference! I remember thinking I was going to die too as SOH said, I couldn't believe you could survive this amount of pain. I had a low dose epidural and practically fell in love with the anaesthetist. After that I was laughing and joking as my ds came into the world, I could still feel the pressure to push but no pain, twas delightful!

Please remember that whatever happens, you need to feel strong enough to ask for whatever you need, even if it means the birth plan goes out the window! Good luck.

Firstly it was not the worst pain I've ever felt, I've had severe back ache that was worse.
I was really worried about the giving birth too but I found that knowledge was power so I read everything I could get my hands on. There are loads of videos on YouTube of very calm normal births, home births, active births, yoga breathing and water births which will give you a more positive idea of what to expect to contrast the hollywood screaming version.
I focused on getting the baby in the right position as I'd heard "back to back" babies are more painful to birth so did Yoga, slept on my left and sat on a birthing ball instead of slouching in an armchair in front of the TV.
I also did "perineum stretches" which was quite tricky at 8 months pregnant so I could only manage them in the bath. This was very useful when the baby was crowning as I recognised the sensation.

When I first went into labour the initial sensations were of a very dull period ache. My contractions came on thick and fast and I felt most able to cope by sitting on the loo (great position to be in a later read) but if you're worried about the baby disappearing down the toilet then look into getting a birthing stool.

The womb is basically a giant muscle so when it contracts to push your baby out it feels like a boa constricta has wrapped round your body and is squeezing the air out of your lungs. This is were breathing comes into play. I know everyone knows how to breath so why do you have to practise doing it. Basically when the contractions are so intense there is a tendency to panic and then breathing becomes very shallow and fast. By practising breathing techniques you can overcome the fear as fear can make the contractions worse and the extra oxygen goes to your muscles and the baby.

Having the baby skin to skin immediately after birth and crawling to the breast will kick off your bodies own natural hormones to help expel the placenta effortlessly.
I felt in control during my whole birthing experience except for one point when I thought that "I can't do this", but I later found out that is feeling is very common and actually occurs very close to when the baby is about to be born, so if this happens to you, you know you're be very close to meeting your baby.

I really enjoyed giving birth, it made me feel very powerful and I hope you do too.

My hypnobirthing teacher, Jackie, has written a book called "The Secret of Confident Childbirth". Hope that helps.
www.thebirthspecialists.com/book.html

i found the pain with dd2 who will be 3 years on 19th of jan

not too bad at the beginning i was 3cms dilated at this stage - i am not good with pain abit of a pain with say a tummy ache
as contractions got closer pain was getting more unbearable cue gas and air
i gave birth in local birthing centre so gas and air only option!!
i found when head trying to come down the most painful as she was along my back and had a massive head!!
i just have to zone out and ignore everything around me otherwise panic and dont breath correctly.
breathing is the key
otherwise pain increases
saying that i am 5ft 2 and weigh 8st and dd2 was 8st 7 and 56cms long
dd1 felt more painful as hadnt done it before she was only 6lbs 12

pain goes right through your whole body
like others have said is soon forgotten and it is certainly worth it

Contractions like bad period pain....very uncomfortable but manageable with TENS and gas and air.
My waters didn't break so I think that made them less intense.

Transition...hardest part but very quick. Feeling like you want to push but not sure if you are ready.....get them to check!

Pushing ....almost a relief .....felt like going for a big poo....just give it all you've got. Best two pieces of advice from midwife....push through your bottom, and push past the pain as the only way to make it stop is to keep pushing!

Placenta.....nothing unpleasant.....just a small push.

Stitches.....didn't feel because of whatever they gave me to numb the pain of them. Sore afterwards for a few days but that is the stitches pulling I think.

Read everything you can so you know your options and drink raspberry leaf tea if that is still allowed (my youngest is 8).

Good luck....I remember thinking immediately after my first that it was nowhere near as bad as I thought it would be!

First was very painful but manageable and overall a great experience.

Second time (induction) was like being stabbed repeatedly with a spear (or similar).

The actual crowning bit that people talk about being the worst didn't bother me.

Wasn't aware of a tear happening but did have one. (Just like you can cut your finger and not even notice until later. Its the adrenaline)

had a local for stitches and that was fine.

Delivery of placenta was barely noticeable.

Cliche, but everyone is different.

Good Luck. Chances are you'll be fine.

Oh and I would put the first birth as being preferable to toothache.

But not the second one.

Contractions were the worst pain I have ever felt by around an hour after my waters broke.....

I had an epidural and it removed all pain and left only the pressure part of the sensation but it only worked for an hour and a half and then I was back to uncontrolled screaming.

If you deal well with pain then the chances are that you will get through this pain okay!

If you have red hair and genetic ishoos with pain relief and anaesthetics in general then the chances are that it will be a total bastard of a day or two!

Well worth it though :)

I agree with the people above who say it is like period pains.
Obviously a million times worse, but that kind of crampy pain. Have you ever had that awful foot/leg cramp? Like that, only over your belly, bits and back. And worse.

It does come in waves though, and everyone gets it different. I had complications in the end, but I found that my waters broke and I kind of pottered about, getting period pains and thinking it was easy, then I stopped being able to talk or stand or see during a contraction after about half an hour.

My tip is to shout and make sure the midwives know you are in pain.

Should also add, because I used to skip over those bits in books, thinking they wouldn't apply to me, that a c section doesn't hurt while they are doing it. It is really weird and uncomfortable - you can actually feel them rummaging about inside you, and they don't do it gently - but it doesn't hurt. You feel what feels like someone pulling under your ribs and a lot of pressure on your belly, but it doesn't take all that long for them to get the baby out, then, if all is well, you get to coo over your baby while they sew you up, and then you, birth partner, baby and one midwife get to go in a darkened room and do skin to skin and so on. You may well start shaking uncontrollably, but don't worry - the big benefit of a section is that you are monitored more than you have ever been monitored in your life.

The worst bit with the c section is the recovery, which will be worse if it was an emergency, just don't push yourself.