Dads on ward after Birth

[mumswish]

Hi ladies,

Does anyone know why fathers are only allowed on the ward during visiting hours once you've given birth. My mate just gave birth and her dp was only allowed there between 12-4 and 6.30-8.30pm apparently its the same if you pay for a private room.

It's really made me worry about ttcing my first child. I havent spent a night away from my dp in over a year apart from when I went into hospital overnight for a operation after my missed mc (cant remember ops name)

I've looked into paying for private med insurance while pg (BUPA) but no hospitals near me. Has anyone had ANY births where dad was allowed to stay as long as he wants while you're kept in?

both in the UK and in Aus dh was able to visit whenever he wanted.... esp with dd1 as she was in SCBU so they did have a chuck out time at night but we just went to SCBU to visit her. Did have a private room with dd1 and so he wa not bothering anyone else.

Here in Aus he could stay as long as he wanted. He did work at the children's hospital - the other side of the hospital complex - not sure if they did not make a fuss as they just glanced his ID badge but he would come at about 7 for a couple of hours before work....... ( started his new job the day after dd2 was born - was due to start the day I had the c-section) I was also very lucky as my aunt and cousin arrived late the first night after dd2 had been born - in fact think it was after official visiting hours and they let them in provided we were relatively quiet. THere was only two of us on the ward and the other woman was sound asleep snoring like the billyo so she was not being bothered.

This is imo, one of the very good reasons for going for a home birth. The midwives bugger off afterwards, leaving you all at home in your own bed. Lovely. This sending partners home thing is bollocks.

BUPA covered dw's medically-required c-section at the Portland in London and I could stay with her for the whole 5 / 7 days. There was a single seat / futon jobby next to her bed. We were lucky. We were supposed to have been at the Royal Free which has kicking out time at 10pm IIRC.

I was glad to be around - dd ended up in NICU / SCBU for 5 days and I could be with dw after her op and could check up on the new baby whenever I wanted.

If certain new mums don't want partners for the night, so be it. They should be entitled to their privacy, and there could perhaps be 'women only' rooms etc.

I would guess, however, that most new mums (especially first time mums) would like the support of their partners, and I imagine most men would enjoy spending time with their new babies. I also think it's a disgrace men get turfed out. After a c-section, having help to sit up in bed etc. etc. is pretty nice, and better than 20 women calling an over-worked mw every 1/2 hour IMHO.

Fair enough if the bloke fancies a rest, or would prefer to sleep at home, but can you honestly imagine what it's like being an involved, caring partner through a (perhaps difficult) pg and getting kicked out at night because of 'ward rules' ?

It sucks.

Would ask friends who have had babies in your local hospitals.

my mum, or one other friend or relative (im a single mum), was allowed to stay with me 24/7 for the 2 days after having my emergency c-section - although they didnt cause all i did was sleep and nurse and sleep some more-, after that they did have visiting hours. Dads had 6 hour window and other people has 2 x 2hr visiting windows, but i was allowed one friend or relative in during the dad hours cause on the first day I cried for hours when everyone elses partners were in and I was alone