I have two suicidal teens and I don't know what to do anymore

[Hrtbrkn]

My 15 yo has been on waiting list for autism assessment for 2 years (finally due Sept) and she's been self harming. Quite badly. She said she's thought a few times about suicide and we've been drs etc and she seems alright at the moment but school is a big issue for her I'm I'm worried about her restarting.

My 18 year old came to me last night shaking and asked me about mine and his fathers antidepressants and told me that the reason he didn't do that well in college finals is because he planned to commit suicide after college so didn't see the point.

I am taking him to the Dr's first thing tomorrow and we had a really long talk.

I have a 20 Yr old who is out of work and seems quite depressed too and a 13yo who seems OK but you just don't know do you.

I have ADHD and depression, their dad is bipolar.

We had kids young before we were diagnosed and I feel like we've just made children that have awful mental health genetics.

Up until about 4 years ago I thought we had done a great job. Covid hit and everything turned to shit

I feel like I'm spiralling and for years I've been terrified of losing one of them and now I feel like it's just a matter of time

How the fuck do I keep them all safe

I don't know what to do anymore

How can we all live like this.

I've applied to join. Thankyou

You can access a lot of child and teen autism charities and youth groups with out a formal diagnosis. Meeting similar teens could help your daughter

We have an appointment this afternoon.
I'm actually scared to go wake him up incase I can't.
I don't know how to live like this

That's so sad Hrtbrkn, big massive hugs!! Hope your appointment was helpful

Thankyou.it was sorting of helpful. We got some info and a follow up booked

The crisis team have been in touch and we are being referred to the home team, and should hopefully hear from them tomorrow.

I think the most positive thing today has been talking. We had a really big talk about all sorts of things and I feel alot more confident that he is relatively safe at the moment and that I need to just be on my toes about checking in with him and making sure we keep communicating

That sounds positive, well done for making it happen. Thanks for updating!

That’s definitely positive @Hrtbrkn ❤️

Remember it takes a while for things to get better and it’s often lots of small steps. This was definitely one in the right direction!

Yes you're right.

I'm not deluding myself to think he's OK or were out of the woods just because he's open to help. But I think I'll be able to sleep at least tonight.

It's a small step but I feel just slightly better.