Anyone interested in an 'extended' bfers support thread?

[lilysma]

Not sure what I mean by 'extended' exactly - maybe it's a self defined thing?

I define myself as an 'extended' bfer because I hardly know anyone else bfing a child as old as mine (DD is 26 months) and feel the need to discuss some issues with people also doing this and wonder if anyone else does??

Anyone up for an informal support thread on this?

Hello, dd is almost 13 months. Am I an extended bfer?

Does anyone else go through phases when they find it annoying?

Indeed you are MM

Yes definitely. Mostly it's lovely, but DS goes through phases where he won't really latch on properly and it's more a game than anything else - lots of swapping sides and smushing his face into whichever boob he's feeding from.

Dita - can you shove the WHO guidelines at your Mum or will that not help? My family made a few comments around the 9-10 month mark about me stopping, but have dropped it seeing as DS is showing no signs of wanting to stop! I think it helps that he only has BM morning, bedtime and during the night, so no-one is really aware unless they are staying with us or we with them.
If she dismisses those then just ignore, it's the best way with mothers I think!

Yes agree with the annoying aspect!

Gemmamc - your post was very interesting, and I have to admit I often feel the same way! Sometimes I just want to sit down and have a cuppa and quick read of something, while DS is playing, but then he'll come over and demand milkies, grabbing at my top an everything. He only tends to do this at home, but sometimes he'll do it when I am out and am sat chatting with someone - it's like he is using more of a way to get attention, so I feel guilty for not doing enough with him. Sometimes I have to do some work when I have him, and then he will come over to me at my work PC and either take my hand and try and pull me away from the PC, or demand milkies. And he'll mess about latching on, have a quick suck and wanting to swap sides 3-4 times, which is bloody annoying.

But I still feel strongly that he is not quite read to wean and he will do so in his own time. He still feeds through the night, generally 1-2 at the most, and we are part co-sleeping - I start off in my bed, be inevitably I end up in ds's bed.

He actually went to bed last night without milkies, normally I lie down and feed him in bed and then either me or DH will sit with him until he goes to sleep. He woke up twice for milkies though. It does feel like I can at least go out for the evening if I wanted without worrying about feeding him first!

Anyway, I have news - I have now got a place on a peer supporter course, after nagging my local Surestart for over a year It starts mid-November and comes with a free Creche place which is good news, as I can't afford to put him into nursery on a day when I am not earning anything.

I will read and catch up later, btu I wanted to ask a question.

ds is 14 months now and is still waking up in the night. He has gone a few months at a time sleeping through and for a while we were at one wake up a night which was fine, but lately it's been mostly 2 sometimes up to 4/5 times a night. I am too weedy to try and settle him without bf as i know he will go back off after a feed. Am i the only one to do this? And how will i tackle it?

argh!!!

Anyone know where that pregnant and nursing thread has gone? I can't find it anywhere and I will need it

Although I only fed my first for 14 months and the second for 9, please keep feeding as long as you can/want.

I hate the social pressure people are put under to give up at anytime from 3 months( they're not sleeping through) to 2 years (they're too old).

As for biting; this is why my second was only fed for nine months. Not only did she bite but she also laughed. The laughing was the final straw!

I still feel a bit guilty. I had wanted to carry on with morning and evening feeds but not night feeds but - to avoid the latter and the serious biting - I had to go cold turkey.

It then took me years to wean her off formula milk (which she loved! little swine). Luckily, we still managed to avoid bottles because she was 7 months before she had formula.

PS. If you want to stop BFing at night, you need to send a man in!

I could never resettle mine without a feed, but my husband could.

Hello

Can I join your party please? Dd is almost 17 months & shows no signs of wanting to stop feeding so I think I qualify! Have seen the thread before & never posted but am starting to feel a bit daunted by constant shock at me feeding still.

Anyway, hello!

MM

I've bumped it for you chairmumMiaow , congrats!!

Hi monkeysmama!

welcome monkeysmama and alittlebitshy, you are by no means alone in the nighttime wrestling. I think my Ds1 was also about 14 months when he went through (another) period of frequent waking and that it was probably around then that he also started that rolling away, then pouncing back just when I thought he was asleep malarky. I think I gathered enough strength to put him back in his bed and that helped a bit ( I was lying down with him then). He only wakes up once or twice now, though he's gained the upper hand in the nightweaning battle and has taken to having such a screaming fit if I suggest he goes back to sleep without milky that i cannot stand it and give in. I had been suggesting to him that we'd have milk when it was light (ie in the morning) when he cried 'LiGHT! ON!'which was pretty cunning and caused me to give up the battle. He's nearly 2 now. I've started to suggest to him that maybe he wont need to drink mummymilk for ever, but this seems to have caused a backlash whereupon he's after it all the time, so maybe that was a bad idea..

Thanks for the welcome

I've read back a bit through the thread & it's very interesting. Dd always bfs at night bedtime, first thing in the morning & at nap times. She often feeds in the night anything from 1-4 times. We half co-sleep so she starts in her cot but comes in with me at her first deep night (after I go to bed) awakening.

She has been teething for the past 2 months almost non stop & waking every few hours for booboo (as she shouts on waking). Two weeks ago I started taking a bottle of Aptamil 3 to bed & I pass it to her when she wakes & unless she's in pain she will go straight back to sleep. I've tried cows milk & she'd just leave it and since I stopped expressing at 12 months (the one part of bfing I hated) she'll have formula if I am out (maybe once every 2 weeks) but won't go to sleep with it.

Our biggest issue is the hair tugging which accompanies the bfing at sleep times. It started with stroking my long hair to fall asleep at c 6 months and has become wrapping hair around her hands & dragging til she's asleep. It hurts a lot. It is very hard to talk about because most people I know (apart from my v supportive mum) think I should've stopped bfing ages ago & that co sleeping is hippy nonsense Dp has been cool about it all (as in supportive) but seems to have decided dd wakes so often because I am bfing still. To be fair all his friends & family are GF mummies & none of them "managed" to bf more than a few weeks so he doesn't have much support there.

Enough random rambling.

monkeysmama ow, the hair pulling sounds painful. What happens if you tie it well back???? Does she hunt it down and grab it back?

pickle at the light on thing. Smart cookie that ds of yours.

I think we had 3 feeds last night. i can't remember {yawn emoticon]. they were all prety close together i think. argh!!!!!

Hallo to all. Sorry have not got time to read thread at the moment but would like to join please. dd is 25 months. When pregnant had not thought would go beyond 6 months. When bf, decided to see if we could go to a year and then there seemed no good reason to stop so here we are. In part thanks to LLL, Jack Newman and Naomi Stadlen.

Not sure about the etiquette of this but another thread had an article about breastfeeding in Mongolia.

This is the excellent article:

drmomma.blogspot.com/2009/07/breastfeeding-in-land-of-genghis-khan.html

To give due credit: the thread is entitled Interesting article by Canadian mother on breastfeeding in Mongolia - Professor Layton

Hi Millimummy! Thanks for linking that article - it's fantastic! I'm going to link to it for my NCT bfc group. What a fantastic environment that must have been to breastfeed in, where every single person you meet thinks it's normal, but also wonderful and health-giving. I liked the bit about the missing breastmilk in the fridge!

Thought I'd introduce myself here....Hello!

I'm feeding DD1 who is 3 and a bit and DD2 who is 7mths. I'm also a LLL leader applicant!

DD1 feeds about 5 times a day, the little one still like a newborn...but then, DD1 fed every 2hrs til my supply dropped in pg.

Snatching some time here while DH and DD1 are out buying chocolate!

druidmama - is it random when dd1 feeds or are there times she expect to feed? my ds who is 14 months feeds morning, nap time and bedtime and then v v randomly around those - more if we're in or at someone's house, less if we're out shopping or on an outing or something.... Oh plus (grr) anything from 2 times upwards in the night.....

There tends to be a big gap in the middle of the day, then a couple in the morning and a few in the evening. If she sees another toddler nursing she'll feed then too!

dd is 15 months and still feeds on average 3 times a day. I'm more than haooy with this as i want her to self wean - but at watch age do you stop feeding them in public. I amtarting to feel a little self consciuos about feeding dd.

hello - dd BFd until 21 months. Started by naturally losing feeds during the day as weaning progressed. Last ones to go were last thing at night and first thing in the morning - the last one at night was the last to go.
When I first started BF her I felt a pressure from many sides (why????? I have no idea) to set a target of when we would stop, and was a little anxious that I was making a rod for my own back and I would need to use cold turkey as a 'method', but it actually happened very naturally and without fuss or upset. I guess she was just ready. I've heard all children are different - would be interesting to see how others fair.

This thread seems to have gone to sleep a bit.

We are living with my mum temporarily and she has been making a cat's bum face every time DD asks for num-nums. Yesterday she told her "you are far too big for that now" (she is 2.7) DD ignored her and settled down to feed. I ignored her too but I'm conscious of an atmosphere, and DD is asking more and more frequently. Anyone else with a 2.7 yo or older still BF?

elvislives - my ds just had his 4th birthday last week, and still breastfeeds. This is despite there being bugger all milk as I am 22wks pregnant.

How long are you staying with your mum?

I only just stopped BFing DS, who is 4.8. For the last one to two years of BFing it was for emotional rather than nutritional purposes.

Um, at the risk of outing who I am (please don't say if you think you know - too many RL friends who lurk), have any of you got any experience of being pregnant whilst already tandem feeding?

Hurray! I've found the thread for me! I was starting to think I was the only full-term breastfeeder in the UK!

DD is 21 months and still going strong - she nurses probably 8 times a day, at least a couple of those overnight. She's a real booby-baby!

She's mostly stopped asking for milk when we're out in public now as she's too busy doing other things, and if she does ask I'll usually distract her or ask her to wait for a few minutes till we get home, but will still nurse her if she really needs it, like if she falls down and hurts herself.

I'm planning to let her self-wean, though we're also thinking of TTC once she turns 2. Might even end up tandeming!

Hello, everyone - I'm new. Just joined and this is my first post!