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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Pregnant and Nursing Support Thread

535 replies

TinkerBellesMum · 25/07/2008 10:06

I thought I'd start up a support group, for those of us pregnant, with an older nursling. If you are pregnant at the moment or tandeming or have done in the past and want to add your support, please post!

I'm 12 weeks pregnant and have a 2 and a week year old. One of the first things I noticed about being pregnant was my nipples felt bruised like she'd bitten me. 8 weeks later not much has changed and I'm still spending every feed saying "gentle please".

Someone please tell me it gets easier!

I'm also starting to feel quite full and hard.

I keep getting told by my family I'll have problems tandem feeding "and how many mothers do you know who have done it?" My dad was grilling me the other day about tandeming and when I'll stop Tink nursing. He's a radiographer. I made him agree with me "Well, you know yourself that when the adult teeth come through because they're in a totally different order to the milk teeth the jaw changes shape" "Yes and around the same time the soft spot in the jaw fuses" "That change makes it impossible for them to continue nursing, that's why they got called milk teeth" lol how could he argue when he'd just backed my argument up!

OP posts:
PuzzleRocks · 07/10/2008 10:06

Good morning

I had my booking in appointment last week and mentioned I was still bfing 17mth old. MW seemed very surprised and expressed concern that it "would take too much out of me physically" to be pg and bfing. Whilst I made it clear I had no intention of stopping in the near future, I have been letting it worry me a bit. Please give me reassurance that I am not compromising my pregnancy. My sister also thinks I am mad because I am quite petite but I don't see that this should make a difference? I'm currently 11weeks.

Thank you in advance.

Original poster
TinkerBellesMum · 07/10/2008 10:13

You've got the same in your breasts however tall /short/ big busted/ flat you are. You must make sure you look after yourself though, your body will feed the baby first, nursling second and you third. It's not been that bad for me to be honest, I feel fine and I'm sure I've lost a little weight, I can afford to

It's not something that people come across anymore so they don't really know but feel the need to give an opinion on. The only opinions you need are from us at least you know you'll get an honest educated opinion! Read through this thread and you'll find women who have had enough of it and women who've come out the other side, I think this is the best diversity.

OP posts:
DeJaVous · 07/10/2008 10:17

I'm also not looking forward to telling the midwife, but I wont see her until I'm 8 weeks.

TBH you just need to be aware that you are better informed about the facts of being pregnant and BF than she is. As long as you look after yourself well all will be well, your body will put the baby first, the nursling second and you last. Eat well and rest when you can

Original poster
TinkerBellesMum · 07/10/2008 10:22

There's no reason to tell them TBH. I have because I found out I was pregnant late and said that was the reason. Fortunately for me I've had lots of positive responses, including being told I'm "an example to us all" The only time I'd worry about telling them is if you are having problems when you breastfeed with the pregnancy - if it was making you have strong BH for example - or if you've been told not to have sex.

OP posts:
DeJaVous · 07/10/2008 10:25

I never even considered not telling them THB. Maybe I wont, I suppose it's not really relevant.

Mind you, I'm not sure I'd feel alright about it, we'll see.

Original poster
TinkerBellesMum · 07/10/2008 10:48

Play it by ear, if you have a MW that you think would be cool with it tell her, but it's not relevant to the pregnancy unless it causes you problems.

OP posts:
DeJaVous · 07/10/2008 11:50

There are 5 midwives at our practice. I think a couple will be OK with it, the others less so. I'll see them in random order throughout the pregnancy so it's hard to know what to do for the best.

Original poster
TinkerBellesMum · 07/10/2008 11:53

Say nothing, it doesn't affect your care or pregnancy. Like I said the only time you need to bring it up is if it's a problem with the pregnancy or you're told not to have sex.

OP posts:
DeJaVous · 07/10/2008 11:58

Silence it it then! Unless DP blabs, I'll have to prepare him

MegBusset · 07/10/2008 12:33

I really wouldn't bother mentioning it. I have only been asked once and that was at my booking in, as they asked how long I'd BF DS for and I said "I still am". The MW looked a little surprised but not in a bad way; later, when going through the antenatal classes that they run, she said of the breastfeeding one, "I don't think you'll need that one... in fact you could probably run it!"

theyoungvisiter · 07/10/2008 12:54

I wasn't going to mention it but the midwife asked me how long I had fed DS for and I didn't have a fib prepared!

She was not sympathetic and told me it was a concern as I would be depriving the foetus of nutrients and wrote BREAST FEEDING ONGOING on my notes in big letters!!!

But since then no-one else has mentioned it or raised it as a concern, and I've not been able to find any research that supports her theory, so I just carried on regardless.

DeJaVous · 07/10/2008 13:11

I've been thinking about it and I'm not prepared to lie by omission over this one after all. It would make me feel uncomfortable and as if I was doing something wrong.

DD is only 10 months (she'll be 11 when I see the midwife) and I'm not having anyone criticising her right to my milk.

I shall be assertive if she doesn't approve and tell her that I'm prepared to discuss it once she's ensured she is well informed over the issue in hand.

This is what I'm saying now anyway, be prepared for a tear stained post on 04/11/08

theyoungvisiter · 07/10/2008 13:22

Well up to you of course - but I don't think you are lying by omission - if it was really medically important they would ask you about it every time - the way they do about drinking and drugs.

You can't tell them about every aspect of your life so you just have to trust them to bring up the important factors.

But of course, if you are worried then tell them.

DeJaVous · 07/10/2008 13:29

'tis true. There will be a lot of things she wont ask me about. I'll play it by ear but it's not something I want to end up feeling uneasy about.

I'm definitely not worried about BF and pregnancy health wise. I'm not looking forward to dry feeding, sore nipples and all that malarky but I trust my body to give my children what they need, born or unborn.

Original poster
TinkerBellesMum · 07/10/2008 13:39

Not everyone's milk dries up during pregnancy, Tink doesn't seem to be able to get enough of mine at the moment!

It's not lying to not bring something up that isn't relevant. However, the age of your child could make them ask. Don't lie if it comes up. If they try to worry you about the baby just tell them baby first, child second, mum third and the only time you need to worry about pregnancy is if it's causing you problems or you're told no sex.

OP posts:
BabiesEverywhere · 07/10/2008 17:37

My milk didn't dry up and the first midwife I saw was very positive about me still nursing my toddler and actually told me I could continue thought the pregnancy and had I heard of tandem nursing ?

So medical peoples attitude do vary a lot !?!

GreenMonkies · 07/10/2008 23:18

"She was not sympathetic and told me it was a concern as I would be depriving the foetus of nutrients "

Oh this one makes me laugh!! I dread to think how big DD2 would have been if I'd not nursed DD1 through my pregnancy. She was born well rounded and 7lb 13oz. Clearly not deprived of nutrients at all!! (DD1 was 6lb 13oz, if that means anything)

I couldn't not tell the MW's I was still bf, DD1 asked for booby at my booking appointment!

PuzzleRocks · 08/10/2008 08:29

Thanks very much for the responses. It's great to have reassurance that I am doing my best for both my babies.

BabiesEverywhere · 08/10/2008 08:38

I agree *GM, My poor baby was born 10lbs 1oz !!!

Tapster · 08/10/2008 08:39

Well I leave this thread, DD has self-weaned at nearly 23 months. I had morning sickness so badly I couldn't feed her before bed two nights in a row and my DH put her to bed, the third night she didn't ask and I didn't offer and so it has ended. A bit sad but a bit relieved as the pain in feeding was getting very bad. Stopping BF hasn't helped my morning sickness but I didn't believe it would, at nearly 17 weeks I'm not convinced it will go this pregnancy. Good luck to all those that plan/continue to tandem feed.

InTheDollshouse · 08/10/2008 08:44

I didn't bother telling my midwife I was breastfeeding. I knew she probably wouldn't react badly - she was the same midwife my friend, who also breastfed during pregnancy, saw, and I knew my friend had already done the work of educating her . I just didn't see it as medically relevant.

BabiesEverywhere · 08/10/2008 13:27

Tapster, Sorry to hear about the continuing morning sickness, hope it goes away soon.

You sound very mixed about your daughter self weaning, which is totally understandable. How wonderful that your daughter self weaned, I wonder if she'll want to resume nursing when your baby arrives ?

InTheDollshouse · 09/10/2008 19:53

Is anyone else getting BH contractions during/after nursing? I'm getting concerned as they're painful and last a while after I stop.

theSuburbanDryad · 09/10/2008 20:15

Hi everyone! Thanks for your posts and sympathies. Things are getting a bit easier, ds has started to take cow's milk at nighttime but I've noticed his eczema flaring up on his back and shoulders so decided to offer rice milk instead but he doesn't like it!!

I have asked not to see my mw anymore as she was so unsupportive of my decision to continue bf-ing and have a home birth. I am instead seeing my (fabulous) GP - who incidentally nursed her youngest dd until she was 3 - and is far more informed about breastfeeding than my mw!

mehdismummy · 09/10/2008 20:17

sud fancy seeing you here!!!!