Mighty oaks from little acorns grow - slow weight gain support thread

[FireworksScareMossyPets]

Thread for those of us whose los are:

• Healthy
• Meeting developmental milestones
• Producing plenty of soaking wet nappies
• Producing several pooey nappies (quantity varies after first six weeks or so)
• Gaining weight...

but just much more slowly than the centile charts tell us they should.

This is a thread for help, support and understanding from other Mums who have "been there, done that".

It's where we can share links, share our stories and what if anything we have done to help our lo's weight gain - or whether we've just ditched the scales and looked at the baby.

However, we also don't want to lull other Mums into a false sense of security; if your lo is not meeting the criteria at the top then it is best to get help from a breastfeeding counsellor (or general infant feeding specialist - not all slow gaining babies are breastfed) or supportive health care professional.

Mossy xx

Hi Lula (love your name)

Constant pooing sounds a little unusual, (although probably still completely normal) at 25 weeks to me - are you thinking the same? One of the things my paed is checking for is cow's milk protein intolerance, which we think is unlikely, because she doesn't poo constantly. I'm not sure if you've had her checked for this. I don't think it's very common though.

Is it, er, "normal" poo? IYKWIM?

laksa, size 10 is positively svelte. Oh, and I am Chinese and dh is mixed (Indian and English) - dd and ds look closest to oriental. I think my pure Chinese genes swamped his. I say this because you mentioned that you are Eurasian and your dh is British and your dd looks like your dh.

Blueshoes you're so right. I hear the words coming out of my mouth and internally I'm going Noooooooooooooooo, shut UP you fool!

Yet there I am, I'm blethering at speed, trying to introduce a paediatrician to the concept of BLW as if I had 30 seconds to explain a dissertation using words of 2 syllables or less.

I know I should just smile and nod, smile and nod. I honestly can't help myself.

It's a disease I think.
Compulsive verbal diarrhoea.

Laksa, I was once a size 10.
A year ago infact.
And then I got pregnant.
And put on 4 stone.

verylittlecarrot, pmsl . I do have to check myself too - but by the time you get to no. 2 (if you intend to have more), it is easier to do less is more. I am mona lisa these days to my HV.

vlc, her poos are normal, so I guess this is normal, but now she is not gaining then I think it is time to investigate. Tried her on soya milk but it made absoloutly no difference, apart from it made her sick.

She is such a happy, well and healthy baby who sleeps reasonably well so I guess not to worry too much.

Ok, we went and had our DD weighed again, and she is still gaining (yay!) - but only 1oz this week, which is really annoying.

I personally crammed a 4oz bottle of breastmilk down her throat not 8 hours ago - so I want to know where it's gone! She hasn't pooed since last Friday (when she had previously gone a week) - so we aren't concerned about that - but just where have the calories gone?? She does produce quite a few wet nappies - is that where it's going? Grrrr

Anyways, up to the dizzy heights of 7 2oz (at 6 weeks) now, so nicely under the 0.4th. Still yet to put a pound on her birth weight...

On the plus side - DW went to a different clinic today and all the HVs were lovely and totally supportive of the breastfeeding - talking down any concern and saying that this is fairly common, and just to keep doing what we are doing, which was lovely - but man, I wish she'd start piling it on

"I personally crammed a 4oz bottle of breastmilk down her throat not 8 hours ago - so I want to know where it's gone! "

Been there, done that.

also can attest to the fact that dd deposited 3oz of wee in a nappy over the course of an hour.

if that helps.

ha ha, I've watched parents feeding their children just before being weighed but since my baby won't take the bottle easily I am a little stuck unless I want to breastfeed in the crowded waiting room (yep no room to breastfeed in at our surgery)

Also I am currently a size 12 since having my baby as I feasted on icecream and curry for the whole ninemonths...the weight does drop off nicely when you breastfeed though so some calories must be going into dd, maybe we just have very active children who burn them off as fast as we fill them up.

Thats a thought, do you think if we expressed off loads more milk a day, we could eat twice as much...or lose weight without trying

Ok, I am rambling now, must go do something useful like make dinner!

xx

I just spoke to a girl whose little boy (16 weeks) weighs 15pounds 8oz, the same as my little girl does now at 34 weeks. Her HV has asked her to come in again next week for weighing as 'he appears to be slipping down off the 95th percentile' and they want to check that he is getting enough food.They are already suggesting supplementing with formula!
This is just another of those amazing indicators of the absurdity of how the system deals with weight 'issues' in babies.
I live in the same area as this girl yet my HV was happy for my little girl to go from the 50th to the 0.4. Thank goodness I had an HV who was happy to support me doing it my way as my baby is now zooming back up the percentiles and I am still BF.
It is just so awful how many scared and worried mums there must be out there because the NHS can't get parity across the system and because experts really quite often don't have a clue.
Aaarggh!!
Big love to you and your lovely light babies! (so much easier on the back I find!)

great post kaballie!

May I ask, when did her weight start to pick up again? Do you feel solids were making a difference, do you think?

Solids very definately made a difference. I weaned her at 21 weeks - She went from one meal a day to 3 with dessert within 2 weeks, it was at this point that she started to gain rapidly (11oz in one week!). I know it also made me feel much better about how much sustenance she was getting. She also dropped a day feed as well so that when she did feed it seemed that there was more milk for her. I still haven't started on meat or dairy yet as I'm waiting for 9 months - check out Patrick Holford's pregannacy nutrition book - some great tips on healthy eating for babies.

I really wanted to hold out as I was a big believer that BF had the most calories nd surely subsituting food for milk was not a good idea bu it seems to me that she was pretty much having as much milk as normal just with food on top of it!

I still feel that for me sticking with BF til I did was the best for her and that she was just following her own curve and is having her spurts now. Who knows - all I'll say is that knowing that she was full and more in control of her own appetite definately took the strain off me. But everyone is different...

and if I can continue being nosey

did you do BLW or spoonfeeding?

VLC, re: your visit to the paed.

You know of Dr. Sears the paediatrician and AP "guru"? He once said that there are two questions you ought never to ask your Dr. "How long should I breastfeed?" and "where should my baby sleep?". I think after your visit we can add a third one; "what should my baby eat?"

The paed is there to tell you if there is anything medically "wrong" with babycarrot. If not (and she seems alert enough to me... just teeny, but I'm not a Dr obviously!) then how you get milk and/or foods into her is not for him to say. You've made absolutely the right decision re: being looked after by the infant feeding specialist.

Everyone else hello! I too have crammed my milky nork into ds' little mouth sitting in the crowded waiting room prior to baby weigh... and wondered where it has gone.

Better go baby crying....

Kaballie yes I do think it depends very much who you see. My usual HV was always brilliant about ds' weight and me bfing, but once or twice I got a different one who tried to put the fear of god into me about it!!

Blueshoes yes these annoying adorable high needs babies. Ds would not be put down until he got to about six months. Even now at nine months (nine months today!) he only allows it sometimes. He has however learned how to nap other than in my arms or in a sling which frees me up a little.

ILD it's good your dw got to see some supportive HVs but ikwym about wishing she'd pile the weight on. I know it's early days and I know you probably won't do it (I wouldn't have done) but have you thought about not taking her for a fortnight or even longer?

Lula I know that after about six weeks, bf babies tend to go much longer than ff babies without a poo.... could it be something as simple as the switch from bm to f and her system is still getting used to the difference? My ds poos several times a day now he is on solids whereas before he once went for 19 days without a poo.

Hello and welcome to anyone I've missed, very busy atm trying to find a job etc. so don't get as much chance to post as I used to....

RTP - 19 days!!! And here was me getting slightly freaked by DD going a week...

We tried co-sleeping for the first time yesterday - woohoo! We all seemed to get a decent night's sleep - although DD still didn't wake herself for a feed (I had my alarm set just in case) - but small steps and all that...

ILD, in the end I took steps (tablespoon of pure orange - he was about four and a half months so I didn't worry too much). I wonder, if I hadn't, would he have gone longer?

Glad you are getting a bit more sleep with co-sleeping... it really has been a lifesaver for me. Must be a pita having to set the alarm but in these early days especially with a slow-to-gain baby those night feeds are important. Still if it's just the once... my ds still feeds three four or even more times in the night!! Ah well.

ILD - just wanted to say that your situation, DW with diabetes, was exactly the example my consultant used for babies being born at a certain weight then 'catching down'.

Since being referred I've not given her weight too much thought, so if you are offered a referral, it can be a blessing.

She still doesn't poo much.

My HV called the other day to ask if we'd had our hospital appointment and what she weighed then. Apparently the Dr wanted to know (well, the doctor would have seen the consultants letter which was copied to me then). I got to tell her how pleased I was that I didn't take her advice. And it felt good!

I have no idea what she weighs, she doesn't poo and doesn't care much for solids. But she is happy.

VLC,
Spoonfeeding - seems to be going fine. I like the idea of BLW but in practice it didn't work for us. Ila is also now in her own cot - like you we co slept til 6 months but solids seemed to help her sleep better and now she is pretty happy on her own though comes in with us occasionally. Also like your baby she did not like being put down - she's getting better though. We carried her in a sling or in our arms til 4 months,even for naps and often throughout the night and have gradually weaned her off it.

Maybe there is a correlation between babies who are so happy and contented through being held or whatever and not needing so much to eat? Works for me anyway!

Ask as many q's as you like. It's nice that something positive can come out of my crappy experiences!

Allie

Took DD to be weighed again today after horrible experience before Christmas where she had fallen way off the centile chart into no mans land underneath.

Surprisingly it was quite positive-she now weighs 13lb 9 (9mo next week). Still off the chart but a bit closer to it IYSWIM. Problem is I don't really know what made the difference.
She is better from the run of coughs and colds she had.
I have been offering her bf at least every 4hrs even if she isn't asking.
I reluctantly gave up BLW and started spooning in some stuff. Bit sad about that but caved under family pressure over Christmas. You make her work too hard for it was my mums comment! I still give her finger food as well and don't actually puree only mash stuff we're having so I feel I haven't entirely sold my soul to AK!

PS VLC as one who has been to medical school I can attest that we did not learn anything at all about breastfeeding, weaning, sleeping or any normal parental concern.

Doctors are great at ruling in/out the serious stuff but have no claim to greater authority on stuff like this honest

Have just seen this thread again after losing it/forgetting about it

VLC - your paed visit sounds alot like mine.

I've just read so much that I cant remember anything specific anymore!

I really wanted to wait til 26 weeks to wean DS2 but around 23 weeks his weight started to slow even more than it had been (he was already well off the bottom of the charts from being born on 91st), I was picking up alsorts of signs and my instincts were telling me that he needed something more so at 24weeks we started with BLW and he loved it! I'd really got to the point where it was solids or formula. I've not had him weighed for probably a couple of months but last time I did he had shot up the charts to the 9th line! I think he may have leveled out abit again now, going to get him weighed Monday.

I identify with so much of what has been said wrt wishing they'd put on weight, feeling like I was failing my baby.

Will try and follow this thread now and post more often and more relevantly hopefully!

Hi

I posted this on the general BF thread, but I think this is the place to be. Its been very reassuring reading all your posts!
--
This is my first post, and I was just hoping someone out there might have gone through the same stuff as us. I could do with a bit of support and clues as to what might happen next. And any ideas to get the calories in.

DS was born 7 weeks early, in NICU for 3 weeks, 4lb 9oz and healthy just had to grow and learn to feed. I expressed then got BF going but he's dropped from 50th percentile to 0.4 (bottom of the chart) in his 11 weeks.

HV not great, just told me to supplement and ring BF counsellor. I finally got to see the BF counsellor last week who helped me improve the latch and in the week I saw her he gained 6oz. Before then weight gain was between 1.5oz and 4.5 oz a week. This week he?s a bit slower again, only 3oz.

HV referred to GP and in turn referred to paediatrician and just waiting for that appt. DS has wet and dirty nappies, has just started to smile a bit (he's 4 weeks corrected age) and is healthy otherwise.

He does have a lot of wind and brings up a lot of milk when it happens (1/2 times a day) but the GP said the only treatments had to be given in a bottle. I don't want to do bottles and I've started expressing and trying to top up using a doidy cup but I think DS is getting most of the breast milk out as I?m only getting 0-20ml when expressing i.e. sometimes nothing. The GP was rubbish and he?s opening line was ? you should start giving the baby formula, some women have gold top and others skimmed, you must have skimmed (I?ve since learned this is nonsense).

I just wonder if the paediatrician is going to insist on supplementing with formula ? is this level of weight gain so bad? Anyone else?s prem baby took a while to get going? And bloody hell, 2 hourly feeds through the day and night ? I?m knackered ? someone tell me it?ll all improve soon?!

Cheers
Anna

at your numpty of a GP!!

And congratulations on both your baby, and on getting breastfeeding going after a difficult start! That is superb - well done.

It WILL get easier.

My baby wasn't technically prem, but she was 3 weeks early, and averaged a 3oz weekly gain for the first few weeks.

If your baby is ticking the boxes re pooey / wet nappies, alert, weight gain, good colour, happy etc, this is a good indicator of health.

You sound like you are well informed, which is great. You probably know that expressing isn't a great indicator of milk supply, and although it is a learned skill which can improve with practice, some of us are still pants at it, whilst others are milk goddesses...sigh.

Is your "bf counsellor" an "infant feeding co-ordinator" attached to your local hospital? I believe that is what the lactation specialists are now called. If so, tell your paed that you are seeing the infant feeding co-ordinator for support for exclusive breastfeeding, that she supports your intention to exclusively breastfeed and you are not in need of nutritional advice from the paed as that is covered, rather that you wish him to rule out any medical concerns.

Better still, get your bf counsellor to speak to the paed or put in writing that bf is going well, latch is good and so on.

The two hourly feeds may continue for a while, (sorry), but keep telling yourself that this is building your supply and helping your lo to grow - and it is normal, honestly!

Some of us co-sleep with our bubs as it makes night feeding sooo much easier. I know there are guidelines with co-sleeping and prem babies though, so do read up on them if you decide this would help. Try posting on the sleep forum if you are interested.

Are you able to keep seeing your bf counsellor - does she attend a baby cafe or clinic, or something similar that you can go to?

LOl anna was just about to link you here from your other thread but obviously you're already here!

DS2 had gaviscon from a syringe not in a bottle so thats nonsense and so is the gold top crap

Bit tired, busy and braindead atm, will try and come back later and post more. Just didnt want to ignore your post.

Have you read through this thread? Lots of good advice and similar experiences