Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Why "choose" to bottle feed???

732 replies

Difers · 13/07/2007 21:08

I am a breastfeeding mum and I meet lots of mums who said they tried to breastfeed but weren't able to which I can totally understand but My mother-in-law said she "chose" to bottlefeed and didn't bother even trying...

So I am wondering, given the benefits of breastfeeding, why would anyone "choose" to bottlefeed??

OP posts:
aviatrix · 13/07/2007 21:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

iamapieceofcheesecake · 13/07/2007 21:20

I choose to bottle feed both of mine. I know I will probably get stick for this, but I didn't like the thought of feeding in front of relatives. (tutter, can I borrow your hard hat please)
bizziebee, I can understand why she might have felt it was 'weird'.

octo · 13/07/2007 21:20

I tried to bf my first - was disaster and switched at 5 weeks - felt completely traumatised by the whole experience and esp pressure of the bf'ers.

So I chose to bottle feed ds2 from birth and was very happy with my decision.

I am currently bf ds3 and am feeling very proud of myself.

What really really really annoys me is having to justify to people why choose to do something.

((I am opting for a riding hat as think this is going to be a very bumpy ride)))

NorbertStanleyFletcher · 13/07/2007 21:21

My DM chose to BF me and DB, and I think that was due to the information she had available and the circumstances she was in (liberal lefty guardian reading hippy in the late 60s early 70s) but I have heard anacdotal evidence that the breast is best message was not as prevalent at some times and in some circles. And attitudes were not necessarily the same, from MW, HV or DHs.

Unless you have walked a mile in someone elses shoes and all that

divastrop · 13/07/2007 21:21

i 'chose' to bottle feed dd1,because i bf ds1 for 6 weeks and hated it.i then chose to bottle feed my subsequent dc as it was what i knew.

bizziebee · 13/07/2007 21:21

I know Daisy - i just think it makes it worse when people just put in pointless posts about lurking and popcorn.

ow82 · 13/07/2007 21:22

end of the day tbh it doens't matter a jot how the baby's fed, as long as baby is happy/healthy/gianing weight giving you los of those explosive poos we all love why does it matter how someone feeds their baby? I've said it all along - even pre DS.

lulumama · 13/07/2007 21:22

no , i probaly wouldn;t , but then i don;t like smuggery dressed up as concerned quesitoning

octo · 13/07/2007 21:23

oooh lulumama! Haven;t seen you for yonks

tutu100 · 13/07/2007 21:23

I was shocked when I had ds and bf him at how many of our friends thought it was weird. Now I could understand that maybe it was odd if they actually saw me bf but I used to go off to feed somewhere else. One female friend did say that she thought it wasn't natural at which point I did explode with the old "your boobs were designed to feed your children, if we were supposed to feed them another animals milk from a bottle we wouldn't have breasts".

I am very pro bf but I would never ever say anything to a bottle feeding mum. If asked I say it is not my choice of feeding method, but it is up to the mother how they feed their child.

However saying all that I do get a bit annoyed by people who won't even entertain the idea. Also I get a bit annoyed when people say they stopped cos they were fed up of frequent feeding (that's what babies do) and I did warn them about it before they had kids.

Hope I haven't offended anyone just wanted to put my pov across have been holding it back recently in rl for fear of upsetting anyone.

lulumama · 13/07/2007 21:24

Hi Octo...RL has been getting in the way..glad to say i have been busy doulaing

Tortington · 13/07/2007 21:24

"smuggery" i like that word..isthat a word?

fannyannie · 13/07/2007 21:24

well speaking as an exclusive breastfeeder, an exclusive FFeeder and currently a mix-feeder I'd say a part of it is down to personal choice - ok my reasons for DS3 having a bottle of FF weren't entirely my choice, but by the age he is now (7 weeks) I had already planned before he was born that he would be getting a bottle of something at least 1 or 2 times a day (I was thinking perhaps Vodka - but DH says "hands off" his posh Polish Vodka, thought maybe Brandy instead ).

As it happens although I'm pretty succesfull with expressing I don't get vast amounts and certainly not enough on a regular basis to give him 2 (or more) bottles of EBM a day. So he mixes and matches.

My reasons for this.....well they're MY reasons and I don't have to tell you

OK - here's a few

So DH can feed him (especially at 2am )

So I can spend time with my older DS's (the first few weeks of exclusive BFing they really missed out - and I couldn't "afford" to let that continue for much longer)

So I can get back to playing the organ and church (yes completely selfish, but unlike my "day job" it's part of who I am, and DH assures me - from past experience - that extended periods of me not doing my music makes me irritable)

So I can start getting my life back into some (very) vague sort of order. Unfortunately as lovely as sitting BFing DS3 all day was it wasn't cooking the dinner, bathing the older DS's or putting them to bed.....

oooooo I can't be bothered - I think I'll just get my glass of Vodka and sit back and watch the show

octo · 13/07/2007 21:25

Glad all is well Lulu

nutcracker · 13/07/2007 21:26

I bottle fed because I wanted to, my body, my baby, my choice.

lulumama · 13/07/2007 21:27

thanks, take it you and the baby octos are all fine and dandy too?

TheMuppetMuggle · 13/07/2007 21:27

I felt breastfeeding was to weird for me, so chose to bottlefeed.
And also gave other family members time to bond with my DD

hana · 13/07/2007 21:28

you know, some people are new to this site and might not have come across threads like this, it might just be genuine interest

octo · 13/07/2007 21:28

Baby octos doing great thanks - could sleep better and feed less though

iamapieceofcheesecake · 13/07/2007 21:28

TBH, I found breast feeding 'weird' beacuse of having to feed in front of relatives (I spend a lot of time with my mum and dad, and I know my dad would feel just as uncomfortable as me).

berylbainbridge · 13/07/2007 21:28

Nope, they are not new.

fannyannie · 13/07/2007 21:29

"Also I get a bit annoyed when people say they stopped cos they were fed up of frequent feeding (that's what babies do)"

oh yes that's another reason - I wasn't enjoying BFing as much with DS3 as I did with DS1 and yes I was getting fed up with the frequent feeds.........but hey not all of us plan our 3rd (or 2nd for that matter ) babies

FA thinks she really should go and finish sorting downstairs and get her Vodka before she gets enbroiled in a big debate

fannyannie · 13/07/2007 21:32

oooo b*gger don't tell me I've even managed to kill a "hot" thread

Mercy · 13/07/2007 21:33

Difers - how old is your MIL?

It's not just a previous generation/last 30 years thing - my grandmother advised my mother to bottle feed. My grandmother would be almost 100 years old if she were still alive!

octo · 13/07/2007 21:33

The frequent feeding thing bothered me with my first, not ds2 as he was 3 hour routine bottle baby which he set himself, but not with ds3 now 12 weeks - would happily feed him whenever and not bothered about it. I have the view that I eat or drink every hour and if you made me wait 3 hours I would go bonkers. I think that you just have to do what works and the more children you have the more flexible you are as to what suits you.