Please give me some responses (sensible and flippant equally appreciated) for my Dh's unsupportive questions/comments about extended breast feeding

[popsycal]

FFS
I feel ill
I have to respond to questions about breast feeding regularly from family and friends. The least I expect is DH to be supportive. Well, at least not critical.

But tonight, he has just confronted me with:
'so give me a ball park figure (twat) for when you are going to stop breastfeeding'
'whenever ds2 wants to'
'people think it is getting ridiculous'
'which people?'
'just people. my mum, people I work with'
'what does your mum think is ridiculous and what has it got to do with people you work with who don't know me and who i have never met?'
'but it is getting ridiculous'
'is it?'
'yes - he would be sleeping through by now if you did not breast feed?'
'would he? which research is this based on?'
'my research (twat)'
'where is your research?'
'in here.... (twat)
'what are your objections?'
'it is getting ridiculous'
'what is ridiculous?'
'that he is nearly two and even people who breast feed think it is ridiculous'
'why?'
'why do you have to do it for so long? you are being selfish. it is nearly all for selfish reasons'

at which point i left the room before i exploded
so bloody cross

lazyline - I am sure that he is,(irrationally so, I feel) jealous. My whole point is though, as booboobedoo pointed out, the whole interogation thing.

Again, I want to ask, what those posters suggesting a compromise would invisage that looking like

"can no one appreciate how bloody soul destroying it can be when the one person who should support you and be on you side is so deluded and irrational?" - yes Popsy, exactly. I think you have done so well to get this far without dh's support. I honestly don't know how I could carry on (confidently) without it. You need his support so that when anyone else has something to say about it, at least you are a united front. Really feel sad for you

Message withdrawn

are qwe having sex?

not sure why I need to answer this but what the heck

more frequently and better in the last few months than in about 5 years

next question

Erm how about...he does the night shifts from now on and you stop the b/feeding?

That sounds fabulous to me

VV - but then that would be me being selfish, surely???????

lounging about in bed getting all the sleep while he slaved away and was up all hours?!?!?

anyway
going to post a really controversial link in education
oh hell
maybe not

Yeeeeeeeeeeeees......and the problem with that is?

Compromise in this situation would surely be that he keeps his opinions to himself and you don't strangle him?

..i need a tongue in cheeck emoticon

Popsy, whats your plan then. Talk it through.

If i feel well enough tomorrow night, it is controlled crying.

If I dont feel well enough tonight, but am feeling better before monday, i will do cc then
if not it is next thursday

dh is away from tomorrow morning til sunday evening

i need time to think about the rest of it

Message withdrawn

i am off to bed with paracetomol and nurofen

Cod

What other stuff is to think about pops?

popsy..... you need a {{{hug}}} babe (and yes i'm aware of how much that sentence will annoy cod )

for what it's worth i did cc... 3 months pregnant and vomiting in the toilet while she screamed and it was bloody worth it so sick or not i'd go for it.

Hi popsycal, just letting you know that if you need to sound off about the cc crying I will be keeping an eye on your thread. Hope you start feeling better soon.

I don't think it's unreasonable for him to want to know when you think you might stop and to want you to stop. He sounds as though he feels upset and excluded.

I appear to be in a minority here but I tend to feel that decisions about birth and breastfeeding are up to the person giving birth and doing the breastfeeding.

I didn't breastfeed DD2 after about 19 months, I think, but her father had been making increasingly unhappy remarks about my breastfeeding since she was about six months. I really didn't feel it was his business. Any more than my decision to give birth at home (against his wishes) was his business.

of course it's his business - he's not just a sperm donor

It isn't his body.

That way lies "we're pregnant" (shudder).

but it is his baby

Quite right MI.

But zookeeper, if a man is that childish to feel excluded when a mum is breastfeeding her child and gets childish about the whole thing then he really does deserve to be called a twat.

Zoo, they're her breasts. It's her body. He can no more tell her what to do with it than she can tell him, say, how best to carry the baby.

God other mamals don't have this sort of interference from the milkless males.