HOW DO YOU FEED A 7 YEAR OLD???...................EXTENDED BREAST FEEDING.............

[RTKangaMummy]

CH 4

TONIGHT

11.00

It is a repeat but thought some people may have missed it 1st time round

.

Sorry my comment about a NT child in nappies obviously means a 10 year old NT child - not a baby!

Sorry being a bit thick here - wots an NT

Ummm not sure myself terramum

I think it is what you call a child that is not SN (Special Needs) but I have only seen this (I think) used on the Special Needs threads here.

Message withdrawn

NT = neurologically typical i.e. where you might say "normal" except normal is meaningless in most contexts so we say NT

Mmmm I remember when my breasts were sexual objects.... now they are not remotely sexual and barely even objects

The thing is though, nappies serve a discrete purpose and when the child has reached the age of being able to control their bowels and bladder, there is absolutely no advantage to the child to wear them.

With breastfeeding, the act of feeding meets so many different needs in the child. No child has to be breastfed at all - all children could be fed in a different way if we chose / need to. But we know there are many advantages to breastfeeding, advantages which don't stop when a child reaches a certain age. If a child still feels the need to breastfeed, then IMO that child will still benefit from breastfeeding.

Wanting to breastfeed past a certain age COULD IMO be indicative of some emotional difficulties. This would be a symptom of emotional difficulties not a cause. I would imagine a child that was asking for the emotional and physical comfort of breastfeeding could get a lot from doing so, whatever their age, and I wouldn't see the advantage in denying them something that would help nurture them on an emotional level just because most other children have grown out of it. Unmet needs don't tend to go away so easily as needs that are met.

Agree totally with your post, Franny.

I will watch this again.

I don't really want to get into an argument and this one will go round in circles forever. But F&Z is right, you can't force a baby or toddler to breastfeed. Try it. I gave up with DS at about 6 months

I think that there are all sorts of psychological issues in both mum and child if a child is breast fed until 7-10 years but to call it obscene is misplaced in my opinion.

Call it unusual, unconventional, inappropriate..etc - but not obscene. I think that's offensive and unfair to extended breast feeders.

And at "discrete" being used in the correct fashion

ds has a big fat cloth bum so nothing discrete there

You may say unusual and unconventional if you like, but only the 2 people involved in the breastfeeding relationship can decide what's appropriate for them.

Just before I go, let me reiterate I used obscene to mean offensive to my sensibility. It does offend my sensibility and I think you should respect that, not take the word as a personal insult!

Going back to something you said earlier DG, I completely agree that a 10 year old who breastfeeds is out of the "normal" range, but that doesn't necessarily mean this is "not right" as you seem to conclude.

Something that is not normal is by definition unusual, but not always wrong.

RR I think the food element is a red herring here. Breastfeeding a toddler is about the association of comfort with another human being, not about food. There is no link between extended breastfeeding and over eating / comfort eating in later life. Was I correct in thinking that that was part of your worry?

I think it is up to the mother and child

In most cases weaning will happen naturally and painlessly if you allow it to

sooner, or later...

Ah get your drift now DG. I guess we will just have to differ on this one as I really dont see bfing as a means of babying young children. Its just something that mammals do. Some just do it for longer than others. The fact that not many children breastfeed beyond ages 7, 8 or 9+ doesnt IMO necessarily mean that its wrong...just unusual. The child wouldnt be doing it if it didnt want or need it so its obviously serving a purpose. Like someone else said there are so many aspects to breastffeding (nutrition, comfort, antibodies etc) that its almost impossible to pinpoint why a particular child bfeeds for longer than another, even within families.

Thanks for humouring my curiosity

There is a cut off age if you bfeed until your child self-weans. It is different for each child, so it's not possible to say "beyond the age of x bfeeding is wrong".

The problem with saying this is people who don't know anything about extended bfeeding go "oh yeah, but how about if your DS is still bfeeding when he's 18 and he has a fag in the other hand" which only serves to mark them out as somebody who is stoopid, I'm afraid

Can I just point out here that the 10yo didn't actually bfeed in this programme?

RR I think sadly the causes lie elsewhere

Feeding to a strict routine that is inappropriate for the baby's physical and emotional needs, as is often recommended these days, will leave the baby suffering dreadful pangs of hunger, fear, loneliness and discomfort. I think in later life it is natural for someone who has experienced this, to have problems recognising their own natural cues for hunger and satiation, and to deal with emotional troubles by eating

didn't we have this exact same conversation last time this program was aired?

Yes and I still haven't watched it, nor will I