Anyone ever SAID anything to you about breastfeeding in public?

[gail734]

I don't go out of my way to do this, but yesterday at lunchtime I BFd DD (9 mo) in TGI Fridays. The alternative was going to be some fussy crying. I promise you couldn't see a thing. The two mummies with me looked a bit surprised. The waiter looked horrified. Nobody said anything, though. A friend told me that another woman called her "disgusting" when she realised that she was feeding a new baby in a sling, while walking around a supermarket!

My GP, when i was feeding ds4 very discreetly in waiting room, a month or so old: WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT BABY?

ME, quietly and quite puzzled: Feeding my baby. .

GP later apologised, a lot, and explained she had mistaken me for somebody else . I had lots of weird convos with that woman, she was a bit ofa cowbag , but I still can't work out what she thought I was doing with someone else's baby under my shirt, and why she needed to talk so loudly.

NB GP was very loud; ds very quiet feeder!

I've had lots.of lovely comments, but once I misjudged getting back to Kent after a visit to friends in London. So, on a commuter train, DD desperate to feed but no room. So once people got off and I managed to find a seat I started feeding poor DD. This florid city suit looked over, jaw dropped, and he emitted this "That is disgusting!" In the loudest plumiest voice you ever heard.

Typically I was so flustered I just turned my back on him and carried on feeding.

Loads of positive comments in general.

Two negative ones:
Once in a cafe, when the cafe owner said "Oh, have you not got a scarf or something to cover yourself up?" when I was feeding discreetly (though I am still not sure if she was actually criticizing me, she didn't say anything else when I said: No, I'm OK though thanks.)
Another time when I had to sit on a picnic chair at a car boot sale and the nearest stall-holder said "You can't do that here, love". I just said I wouldn't be long (though felt ) and he tut-tutted and went off...

I've breastfed everywhere too - when out with pram, have had to sit at bus shelters if no park bench nearby...sitting in an aisle of Asda as the baby-feeding room was full/ baby was starving...

I was breastfeeding my DS at a first birthday party for one of the other babies from his post natal group.

The hostess came up to me looking disgusted and said ' That's why I stopped breastfeeding at 8 weeks. Still, hindsight's a wonderful thing...'

Typically I couldn't think of anything to say back.

My mum once said something very positive about BF, when i was bf somebody or other, prob ds1. 'Breastfeeding's a lovely feeling, isn't it?' The list of pos comments re parenting and my mum is fairly short, but that's one I do recall. It gives me a warm glow still.

When i was told I couldn't feed ds at my nephew's party, he of the coy mother above, becos her dad was 'a bit old-fashioned', my dad said 'Isn't breastfeeding a bit old-fashioned then?. I still spent most of the party in a cold bedroom, sitting on floor, with bad back, lovely relies.

Great thread with some brilliant comments. I too fed everywhere and anywhere and was a fan of the aggressive staring back at anyone looking or tutting at me. I did manage to totally embarrass the elderly ladies and priest who were running the baptism classes at church by whipping out a boob mid class to feed my 3 month old DD2!

Funniest comment was from my neighbour's lovely 9 yr old daughter who suddenly realised that the baby was feeding, not sleeping and exclaimed "are you feeding your baby WITH YOUR BOSOMS??" which made me chuckle.

Nearly 6 years of bfing over the years. Lots of lovely comments, lots of smiles, a few people wondering if I'd be more comfortable elsewhere but I think they were just being kind, not horrified. Not so much as a negative eye roll from anyone. I used to be coiled, ready to defend myself from arsey comments but I don't even think about it any more.

The posts about children have reminded me of my friend's 8 year old DD. she gets very embarrassed about boobs in general and when I went shopping with my friend and her DD one day and the DD realised I was going to breastfeed in a coffee shop we'd popped into she was mortified. I told her not to worry, no one would see my boobs and when I fed my DD she walked round me slowly, peering from all angles until she finally said 'you're right, no one can see your boobs'.

Only ones from PIL who informed me I wasn't 'allowed' to go to their house when DS was a baby and needed feeding as they were offended . Actually, bloody fine by me Will just add this comment was made whilst at their house, a copy of The Sun laying on the coffee table. Everyone else was lovely, inlcusding actually lots of quite old ladies who commended me on it.

I have breastfed on the tube and nobody said a word.

No negative comments but have had some people avoiding looking at me which I think is usually embarrassment on their part rather than disapproval. Had a few comments about how wonderful bf is from some people. Have fed expressed milk in a bottle also on occasion and never had comments about that either. I think the majority of people respect other people's decisions and are polite.

I've breastfed all 4 while out and about (not at once though lol) and nobody has ever made a negative comment. I may have been lucky, I don't know... and although each baby was a different experience (one would take a bottle, the other wouldn't etc) it was nice to know that it was always on tap! I always found that they didn't need / want a long feed while out. If I was stuck - eg., on a country walk on a cold day - I would use the car - very comfy! :)

I was a lot more restrained with DS1 than I am being with DS2. So far, haven't had any problems - even had to feed DS2 yesterday at the Warner Bros. Studios (Harry Potter tour) and while they did lead me off behind the scenes (literally! ) I think that was more for MY benefit than anyone else's, and I was quite happy to do it there rather than in the very noisy cinema area.

Where I live in Australia, it's a lot more common to see women breastfeeding in public and less comment is made; I was a bit wary here but I'm even doing it in my Dad's sitting room (something I never did with DS1) because, perhaps, I just don't care so much this time around if someone else has a problem with it, DS2 needs feeding and that's that. I'm very discreet though, no one would see anything apart from maybe a bit of skin between the two layers of clothing and above DS2's head.

I fed all three of mine, 21mths in total. There was only one place I couldn't breast feed, and that was in the same room as my dad, niether of us were comortable about it. Other than that I fed them where ever they were hungry. Refussed point blank to feed them in a baby change/breast feeding room as we wouldn't eat our dinner in a loo!

The only person to ever say anything to me was my Mum. She told not to feed ds1 in front of my brothers. Neither of them were in the least bit upset by it. Bd1s wife was pregnant with their ds1 at the time.
I told my mum off. Honestly. How daft.

I should add though that my sister came over while I was feeding Ds2 in Dad's sitting room and she commented that it was gross (she's very anti, said the thought of it made her feel ill, she didn't want to be "like a cow" etc.). I expected that but was saddened that it had rubbed off onto her oldest DD as well (9) who also said "gross!" The younger 2 girls were more interested and less disgusted, and I told them all it was a completely natural thing to do and not at all disgusting or gross.

What did make me laugh, and disgusted my sister even more, was when my 5yo DS1 started pretending to be a baby again and her DD2 pretended to breastfeed him - we may have a convert yet!

Fed #1 for 12m in London and can't remember anything odd.

Am currently (as in, at this moment and generally!) feeding #2 in NY. I have been shocked at how pro-BF everyone is: really pleasantly shocked. I fed him this weekend in a relatively posh restaurant during brunch: a waitress came over and sorted me out with a chair in a quieter part of the restaurant (in a nice way, not a 'get out of people's sight' way).

Have fed on the subway - nobody seemed to even notice.

Also fed whilst helping #1 at the playground: one arm cradling a feeding newborn, the other holding her hand. Playground was full of middle school kids who again seemed to not to notice (although they may have been more interested in flirting with each other ).

Fed this weekend at a course full of men (fitness related, so young athletic types). No comments made, nobody seemed to bat an eyelid.

Fed today at a doctor's appointment (unrelated to baby or pregnancy/birth). The assistant drew the curtain to block out the craziness of the clinic and delayed calling the doctor through until I'd finished and baby was snoozing. Really considerate I thought: she treated nursing like it was a totally normal thing (as it is!) and not something to fuss about or make a big deal over.

And I'm not a neat nurser: I have a hugely fast and powerful letdown so if the seal is broken for more than a second gallons of milk pour everywhere... I also refuse to use a nursing cover (since I'm not embarrassed to be nursing...) so it can be quite obvious what I'm doing.

Couldn't care less what people thought to be honest: I'm giving my children the best possible start they could get and protecting my own health in the bargain. Anyone who has a problem with that is ignorant.

Really enjoying all these stories, especially as so many are positive.

Always intended to be a militant breastfeeder, so was hoping to encounter some criticism merely to give them a piece of my mind! Never happened though, even with a screechy reflux baby who was a nightmare to feed...

My favourite encounter was at a friend's christening when my DD was only a few days old. After the service I sat down to feed her (for the requisite hour and a half...) and was immediately surrounded by a group of toddlers. All were very interested and clearly remembered...and one little boy, who had been recently weaned, was practically drooling as he looked on with begging eyes!

I also was once having some ski boots fitted in a busy outdoor shop when a woman came and sat down next to me and breastfed her baby. We were in special ski-boot-fitting chairs which were raised up high and had special heated bits, so not even for general use...but not one of the rugged outdoor types so much as batted an eyelid!

EVidencedBasedMum - that bit about the recently weaned toddler drooling made me smile and remember that a friend of mine in Australia had weaned her DS4 last august - and yet when he saw me feeding DS2 his eyes were all round and remembering - he turned to his mummy and pointed to her breasts, hopefully! She said "No, still broken, sorry" - amazing he can still remember doing it, my DS1 had forgotten all about it in a week.

Was feeding 8 week old DS in a cafe with child-free 'friend'. I thought I'd done quite well latching him on with minimal fuss (and milk-spraying). I looked up to find my friend watching me coolly. She then smiled and said 'There's just no dignified way to do it, is there?'
I just laughed and changed the subject, but it wasn't the first or last unpleasant comment.

I've had no other comments, apart from a ffing friend and her DH who asked if I wanted them to close the blinds whilst I fed DS in their kitchen! You could see nothing, but I might as well have been sitting there with my top off the way they acted

DD (3) saw my friend breastfeeding and said that friend was feeding baby out of her elbow! DD now talks about how I gave her milk out of my boobies and she sometimes breastfeeds her doll.
No negative comments here either, but then I felt quite self-conscious about it so would often find a feeding room. More conscious about my flab that the actual breast feeding.

Some of these are making me laugh - honestly why are some people are so weird about feeding a baby?!

I bf dd for nearly a year and can't remember anyone saying anything negative and I bf pretty much everywhere.

I never had a bad comment from anyone about feeding either of my girls and I use to feed them anywhere they needed feeding.