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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Anyone ever SAID anything to you about breastfeeding in public?

350 replies

gail734 · 12/04/2013 18:52

I don't go out of my way to do this, but yesterday at lunchtime I BFd DD (9 mo) in TGI Fridays. The alternative was going to be some fussy crying. I promise you couldn't see a thing. The two mummies with me looked a bit surprised. The waiter looked horrified. Nobody said anything, though. A friend told me that another woman called her "disgusting" when she realised that she was feeding a new baby in a sling, while walking around a supermarket!

OP posts:
Voodika · 14/04/2013 10:43

My DD1 had a fiend to play, they are 9. I was feeding my little one.
I loved her comment. " what are you doing? Oh you're milking her"

MB34 · 15/04/2013 10:51

I was (discretely) bf in a cafe and an elderly gentleman came over to me and said, I don't want to intrude but you've got a very lucky baby there.

I assume he meant that I was bf him and not that I have big boobs lol!

MrsDeVere · 15/04/2013 11:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BramblyHedge · 15/04/2013 11:19

Nothing very negative but was asked to move to a side room by a nurse in the outpatients waiting area as some elderly man had complained to reception.

Emilythornesbff · 15/04/2013 11:58

brambleyhedge that's not on. She should know that.

I've fed both my DCs everywhere; on public transport, restaurants, park benches, supermarkets etc. I got to almost a year with DS before a shop assistant in an independent department store raced towards me as though thwarting n armed robbery, and asked me to go somewhere private to feed ds. I hadn't even got started.
No one else has ever commented.

I love those loaded comments (like from my DM) " well it's fine if you're being discreet, but there's always that small percentage of women who refuse to be discreet.." not really mum.

DinoSnores · 15/04/2013 19:03

The only negative I've had while BFing DS to 16 months and 8 week old DD (I am literally feeding her as I type this) is from my mother. We were out for lunch in John Lewis when DS was 4 weeks old & she said I should put a muslin over his head. Hmm

Other than that, absolutely nothing. There was an older chap who tapped me on the shoulder in Starbucks when I was BFing DS. I was all ready for an argument and was almost disappointed when he said, "Would you mind keeping an eye on my coffee? I'm just off to the loo." Grin

I've fed in loads of places, church every Sunday as she always needs fed during the service, on the ground outside a NT cafe after the fire alarm went, on trains, planes, buses.

MyNameIsAnAnagram · 15/04/2013 22:05

Only ever positive comments, usually in m&s cafe by battle-axe looking old ladiesWink

Two stick in my mind though, one new mum who when I was feeding 4mo ds came up to me and thanked me as seeing me had helped her have the courage to feed her 10day old on public for the first time. The other was on holiday, I was feeding 11mo ds in a park and an Italian lady of 60ish was talking to me about it. She didn't speak English and I don't speak italian but she was clearly saying how great bfing is and how it helped you lose the baby weight Grin

geekette · 15/04/2013 22:12

mostly positive comments. I did get a sad comment once. it was in the hospital restaurant. an older lady told me how much she would have loved to bf but she lost her baby.... and she was in hospital because the husband was quite frail. brought a few tears to my eyes...

NaturalBlondeYeahRight · 15/04/2013 22:22

Only one negative comment from a man I thought was my friend (and his wife was bf her baby at the time) DD was 6 weeks and everyone else at the office was cooing and he was 'can you not go to the loos to feed her!'
I was Shock otherwise I would have given him a piece of my mind. Everyone else told him to bugger off and stop being silly. This was 10 years ago and it still bugs me.
Every other comment was lovely.

CalamityJ · 16/04/2013 04:59

Friend's DH & friend came round when DD was 4 weeks old. Time for her feed so started preparing with shawl & he said 'you're not doing that here are you?' What, in my own home on my sofa when my DD is asking for a feed? Why yes I am! He swapped places with my friend and I carried on chatting to her. What a knob. Only ever had positive comments especially from my DF who seemed proud of me as 'breast is best' (his words and he doesn't usually do 'proud')

Fifyfomum · 16/04/2013 05:27

Only nice things.

BeCool · 17/04/2013 12:15

I BF 2 DD's everywhere for 14 & 18 months.

the only person who ever said anything was a so-called 'friend' who looked horrified and said "people are looking" when we were in Pret. She was terribly embarrassed and wanted me to stop - she is very much an uptight "what will people think?" kind of person. I am not.

I'm pretty sure that was the last time I embarrassed her with my babies eating habits met up with her. Some friends just don't carry over into life as a parent (I could never take my DD's to her place - they might touch something!)

fedupwithdeployment · 17/04/2013 13:02

I can't recall any negative comments, although an elderly French aunt was a bit non plussed when I bf DS1 aged 7 months in a restaurant.

I do recall being at Gatwick driving to drop bags with DS1 (2.5) and DS2 (3 months) and there being a huge (45 min) queue. DH wasn't with us. I asked if it was really going to take that long and if there was an alternative? Told that sorry, no, I'd have to wait. So I said, "That's fine, I'll feed him here," and started fiddling with my top.

BA lady grabbed my bags very quickly Grin

fancyanother · 17/04/2013 13:06

I've breastfed everywhere, and I've never had any comments. Was never remotely aware of funny looks either. I do remember whenI was BFing my second DC, my DS1 had had the process explained to him loads of times. When we were in a cafe, a mum was trying to feed her baby discreetly and he shouted loudly 'Look mummy- that babys having his milk!'

FrozenNorthPole · 17/04/2013 13:20

I've had loads of nice comments - I particularly like the older lady who was a little hard of hearing and bellowed "GOOD ON YOU PET!" in the middle of Sainsbury's cafe, causing the entire place to fall silent in surprise. In the same cafe albeit on a different day, I was approached by a wandering toddler who tried to climb onto my lap and latch on (I was feeding my newborn at the time). The little boy's grandma was horrified and kept apologising as he tried to lift up my top, I couldn't stop laughing. I considered posting on here to see if he was anyone's tandem-feeding toddler.
The only slightly negative things I hear are when children are told "don't look over there / stop looking at what she's doing" in public - I can't exactly reply "no, it's okay, look" because that would clearly be weird, but it makes me sad to think that children might think of it as shameful or disgusting because of these messages. I have been known to address the child and say "my baby is having a nice drink of milk, that's all" but it depends on exactly how cross / embarassed the parent is looking and how far away they are.

toffeelolly · 17/04/2013 13:49

I think people who say any remark's about breastfeeding in public are the one's who are disgusting.

toffeelolly · 17/04/2013 13:53

And if i wanted to breastfeed my baby, i would in public, what is the problem?

Fillyjonk75 · 17/04/2013 14:13

I was always ready for negative reactions, but never had any. Some people used to seem a bit more interested than they otherwise would be but most I doubt most people even realised what I was doing.

PeppermintCreamsSaga · 17/04/2013 14:55

I've never had anyone make a comment. I always make an effort to smile at breastfeeding mums when I notice.

They do need to mention it more on tv. They don't even have to show mum feeding the baby. Just have a breast pump and breastfeeding cushion on the side. Mum wearing a obvious breastfeeding top.

WoTmania · 17/04/2013 15:54

no one has ever said anything to me even when nursing a 2/3yo in public (probably by the time they were that age they felt I was a lost cause)

FannyPriceless · 17/04/2013 16:04

In Sainsbury's once I was desperate to find a seat so I could feed DD. So I sat down on a seat in the cafe without buying anything and started feeding her.

Almost immediately one of the cafe staff came striding over towards me. I was quite prepared to burst into tears at that point, but she very kindly said "Would you like me to bring a glass of water? Is there anything else I can get you?"
:)

midori1999 · 17/04/2013 16:50

No one has ever said anything at all to me.

When I was feeding in arrivals at Cancun airport at Christmas though, a very security guard came and took us to a 'special' line at the end with only a few other people in front of us. The airport was absolutely packed and I imagine we would have been there for hours otherwise, but it may not have actually had anything to do with me breastfeeding, although it's very accepted in Mexico.

Coming back through the airport another English couple did give me a look, give each other a look and then smile/smirk at each other after they had noticed me breastfeeding. I wasn't sure if it was as I was breastfeeding an 18 month old, because I just whipped my boob out or if it was because I was feeding her in a carrier, but I didn't care less.

WouldBeHarrietVane · 17/04/2013 17:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

gabsid · 17/04/2013 18:48

I read bits of this threat but haven't spotted anything negative stuff.

Same here I bf 2x for 14 months, anywhere.

Who are these people who think you have to hide to feed your baby because someone might be offended - of what? Something that has always been the most natural and lovely thing?

BasketzatDawn · 17/04/2013 18:56

My then 5yo nephew, in 1990 : What's she doing?

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