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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

OK, Who has breastfed their DP or DH?????

137 replies

drosophila · 02/02/2006 10:46

Come on then is it really that weird??

ANy Dad's out there??

OP posts:
Socci · 02/02/2006 23:26

Message withdrawn

handlemecarefully · 02/02/2006 23:27

Oh ffs (that is for flips sake since we can't swear), tmi [gagging emoticon]

Heathcliffscathy · 02/02/2006 23:28

whatever you think about this issue, i can heartily recommend fresh milk, is a great read, v funny and informative.

sparklymieow · 02/02/2006 23:32

never BF DH, but did squirt some in his eyes accidentally when DS popped off my boobs while BF in bed pmsl

hub2dee · 02/02/2006 23:43

If I don't post, someone will think I cured dw's mastitis with some oral assistance, LOL... so, to clarify....

I tasted a couple of drops in the first few weeks when testing temperature of the bottle. Would have no interest in drinking more than a drop. Would have no interest in replacing our trusty (but noisy) Avent, LOL.

alexsmum · 02/02/2006 23:46

socci there is a whole movement that advocate having sex while in labour too- now THAT is gross! and unimaginable too- i would have punched dh if he'd tried to even touch me down there or anywhere actually while in labour!

drosophila · 03/02/2006 11:10

What does TMI stand for? It's been bugging me for ages.

OP posts:
littlemisspiggy · 03/02/2006 11:38

Blu- your 6.09 PM post yesterday could have been me. Not looking fwd to the same situation with DS2 when he arrives although reading other posts on here maybe I should lightnen up!

littlemisspiggy · 03/02/2006 11:39

Blu- your 6.09 PM post yesterday could have been me. Not looking fwd to the same situation with DS2 when he arrives although reading other posts on here maybe I should lightnen up!

littlemisspiggy · 03/02/2006 11:39

Blu- your 6.09 PM post yesterday could have been me. Not looking fwd to the same situation with DS2 when he arrives although reading other posts on here maybe I should lightnen up!

Rhubarb · 03/02/2006 11:54

Here are my thoughts, for what they are worth.

When you are breastfeeding your baby, you are using your breasts as they were meant to be used, you are providing nutrition for your offspring. This action is not sexual at all, it is maternal. But to have a dh or dp suckling at that milk, well I think that breaks the boundaries between maternal and erotic. In my mind there is something pure and even innocent about a mother breastfeeding her child, to turn that into a sexual thing is tainting that image and it is tainting breastfeeding.

Not saying that those who do this are perverts, but personally I find it distasteful (scuse the pun!). I couldn't even let my dh touch my breasts when I as bf, they had lost their sexuality to me, they were for the baby and that was that! It was only after I'd stopped that I allowed him near them again! I understand that many men find it fascinating and during sex they might want to take a mouthful, I just find it strange that the mother would be turned on by this. And as for feeding your dh/dp at the same time as your baby, well that's turning a beautiful experience into something that it just should not be.

It's so sad when as women, we cannot do anything without it being perverted in some way, from giving birth to feeding, there will be someone who will want to sexualise it. Just adds to the notion that women are sexual objects, nothing more.

cod · 03/02/2006 11:58

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FrannyandZooey · 03/02/2006 12:01

I think that is like saying you will never have sex again because it will taint the holy birth canal that has borne your baby into the world, Rhubarb. Seriously. Why is it a problem? Breastfeeding and sex can both be beautiful things. They don't have to exist in completely separate worlds in case one gets contaminated.

cod · 03/02/2006 12:02

Message withdrawn

Rhubarb · 03/02/2006 12:02

I think you misunderstand me. Of course there is nothing wrong with finding your body erotic. But I'm talking about having your partner suckle whilst your baby is suckling. Like having sex whilst actually giving birth - it's just not right!

cod · 03/02/2006 12:05

Message withdrawn

FrannyandZooey · 03/02/2006 12:11

Cod don't forget some of us breastfeeding ladeez have quite big children

Rhubarb, no, I think I did understand. I don't think anyone here has said they breastfed their partner at the same time as breastfeeding their child, or had sex while doing it, but if your partner feeding from you while you are alone together turns you or him on, what is the problem? It doesn't affect anyone else as far as I can see.

FrannyandZooey · 03/02/2006 12:12

Unless of course you get the neighbours in. Which is going too far and a Very Bad Thing Indeed.

Blu · 03/02/2006 12:13

Rhubarb - I was pleased that I could still feel that my breasts - and me - still had a sexual identity, that belonged to me and DP, whilst having a feeding function that belonged to me and DS. I didn't confuse the two, but was able to keep both going in separate lanes. I didn't feel that it was imposed on me, or demanded of me, and DP was very supportive of bf.

Just got annoyed by DP's interest in expressing.

Blu · 03/02/2006 12:16

Er, no, I certainly didn't have sex simultaneously with bf DS. They were separate. Much like when I eat, I eat, when I kiss, I kiss. Same mouth, different job.

cod · 03/02/2006 12:17

Message withdrawn

Rhubarb · 03/02/2006 12:18

I don't understand this either. I just I don't like the thought of breastfeeding being turned into a sexual experience.

Each to their own!

georginars · 03/02/2006 12:26

gosh. I do think that actually breastfeeding (i.e purposefully) your partner is a Freudian nightmare of enormous proportions. understand it could briefly happen inadvertently between the sheets (althoguh agree with cod, there seems to be an awful lot of sex going on between people with small babies - how?) although in my case norks were strictly off limits whilst I was breastfeeding.
but I'm sorry, breastfeeding is for my child not my DH. i would be seriously concerned if he requested feeding!

FrannyandZooey · 03/02/2006 12:29

Is it because you feel uncomfortable because breastfeeding is to do with children, and children should be kept away from sexuality? I see what you're getting at, but I think we women do ourselves a disservice if we perpetuate these strict divisions between mother / whore. Breastfeeding women can be sexy, and they can enjoy sex (or so I have heard ). Even the milk can be sexy. I think pregnancy and lactation can be very erotic times in a woman's life.

FrannyandZooey · 03/02/2006 12:30

Sorry, that post was to Rhubarb.

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