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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

^^Extraordinary breastfeeding - tonight on C4 ^^

843 replies

harpsichordcarrier · 01/02/2006 17:27

new thread for RTKM

OP posts:
Roxswood · 02/02/2006 19:10

I feed my 19 month old on demand because I look on it as a healthy food, that she should learn to control her own intake of.
She probably feeds 20 times a day some days and only 10 others but I love the feeds and she obviously does too, we both get so much fun and pleasure out of her feeding, so why would I restrict it?
And for the record, I don't bf on demand because "I can't be bothered to do anything else" I bf on demand because I think its an age appropriate thing to do, and if she wants to snack I'd far rather it was bm than something with far less nutritional value.
Food should be comforting, and it should be social and bf is exactly that, think tea with friends rather than chocolate or cake and you'll know where I'm coming from.
Comfort eating alone is unhealthy, sharing food as comfort while you are with friends or family is healthy. Which is bf most like?

bundle · 02/02/2006 19:13

we eat food round a table together,it's fairly sociable

ruty · 02/02/2006 19:13

yes bundle, the bottle was formula - i just thought maybe she pursued the ebm...

bundle · 02/02/2006 19:14

she probably did.

marytee · 02/02/2006 19:14

Totally all about her. Not about the needs of a child who is likely to have had multiple caregivers in her short life and whose primary needs, frankly, would not be about breastmilk (wonderful though it is, I b/f my DD by the way.)

Strange people, strange language, strange situation: really no need at all to add another 'strange' experience (strange as in strange for her i mean) into the equation .

The child's behaviour (for her age) was untypical for an interaction with a relative stranger. Unfortunately likely to be indicative of a disturbed attachment history rather than her developing relationship with adoptive parents, although hard to judge from short exert shown.
(BTW, not suggesting they shouldn't have cuddled her, just that it does not mean she felt safe ).

emkana · 02/02/2006 19:26

roxswood, at 19 months I was still breastfeeding on demand too. A few months after that I started to feel with both my dd's that they would get a bit obsessed with b/feeding, stopping them sometimes from playing/making other experiences/interacting with me in different ways. It got to the stage where I felt I couldn't sit down with them for an activity because they would immediately asked for the breast. That's when I felt it necessary to start introducing rules when to breastfeed, and they accepted these rules happily.

morningpaper · 02/02/2006 20:23

Those of you who found the adoptive mother overbearing/weird, did you bf toddlers yourselves? Because having had a nursing relationship with a toddler I can REALLY understand why she wanted that with her new daughter.

pookey · 02/02/2006 21:24

All the women seemed to have their own agenda motivating them to extend bf beyond meeting their children's needs - guess they were the type of people who were willing to go on tv though. Did think the little angels company should have their own documentary as their story was interesting in a separate way and shouldn't necc be associated with 'extrodinary' breastfeeding. (sorry haven't read all the psots)

Oh yes I have bf over my top in public but that was when I was a novice and wearing one of those ridiculous bf tops from H&M, couldn't get my boob out of the hole and was undecided about what was most undignified to reveal my huge squidgey stretch marked tummy or my fairly normal boobs!

pookey · 02/02/2006 21:27

Back to the current discussion I felt really sorry for the spanish lady's son as he looked really uncomfortable and confused when breastfeeding to show his new sister what to do, hardly the best start for their new relationship?

Aloha · 02/02/2006 21:33

I think it's really sad that it takes so long to adopt a child from abroad (or here come to that). Saw the adoption programme on teh other side and was heartbreaking to see them have to say goodbye to a child for months and months leaving them in a scuzzy horrible orphanage. Awful. Babies need mummies.

pookey · 02/02/2006 21:42

agree it is sad it took so long, the spanish lady's original intentions were sweet and if the process had been quicker it would possibly have worked well for all the family, she should have set a deadline in her head for when she would give up on the bf plan - would she kept bf her son indefinately?

lovecloud · 02/02/2006 22:19

All the boobs on that show were horrible looking and the would put anyone off b/f.

When I breastfed my dd, no-one ever saw a glimpse of my boobs. I was discreet which I think we should be. There is no need to flash them about in peoples faces.

The children should know too that they are private and not there to be pulled, tugged and whopped out when they want.

I had a problem with the whole "feeding on demand" i only fed on demand when my dd was newborn to get my supply going and lile most people they naturally fall into a pattern of feeding times. There was no need to give her more in between and she had plenty of higs for comforting times and never sucked a dummy or her thumb. Its not right that these older children thought they could pull their mums body part out whenever they wanted.

I thought it was sick and made me "a big breastfeeding fan" feel uncomfortable. Those children will be ripped at school - they were weird kids fullstop! The 8 year old even made some strange comment at the end that when she grows her own boobs she will suck them or drink her own milk - YUCK! I dont care what anyone says but she is f*ed UP!

The show has definitely done nothing to help encourage people breastfeed which is a shame. They should of showed the "normal" side of breastfeeding too.

Rodeo · 02/02/2006 22:30

Lovecloud, that's a bit harsh

Watching it now on E4,and think the children all seem very normal, a little precocious maybe but aren't most 8 yr old little girls? And the twins are gorgeous!

Don't have a problem with seeing ladies boobs, breast-feeding or not, it shouldn't be an issue

What I do find offensive is all the negative comments of the 'general public', makes me want to hunt them down, ggggrrrrrr

And we should remember the programme is called 'extraordinary bfeeding', they're not going to feature us 'normal' bfeeders, we're too boring to feature on C4!

MrsSpoon · 02/02/2006 22:36

Flippin' 'eck! I'm not reading all 700 odd messages on this thread!

Thought the programme was very interesting. Funnily enough I didn't find the 8 year old too odd, thought it was nice that she was able to feed for as long as she had the natural sucking reflex. I didn't find the comment that she would drink her own milk odd, rather just naive.

Found the twins heartbreaking and could not understand how the mother went from feeding them up to 20 times a day to nothing just like that, don't understand why she didn't cut them down gradually, IMO this would have been easier for everyone involved.

The one that I found a little freakish was the mother of the four year old who was keeping her milk going for the chinese baby she was adopting, who was now 18 months. I found it quite upsetting that she was trying to get her to b/feed.

LOL at the chav guy in the hat who shouted about his child being "strong as an ox" and loved the reply that one of the Mums gave him that her child was "intelligent as a human" and ROFL at his mispronunciation of paedophile and what a paedophile would get out of looking at a woman's breasts is beyond me.

Had to ask though why the majority of the women on the programme were opening their tops from the top down, not the most discrete way to b/feed IME.

Interesting programme.

nanneh · 02/02/2006 22:39

lovecloud - ehemmmmmm - who says you have to have beautifully shaped boobs or a beautiful figure in order to be able to breastfeed ? The Anti-Ugly Boob Squad ?

I think women need to have a more sensible attitude to less than perfect boobs !!

ps - mine are perfectly shaped size 38 DD of course - even that bloody awful Jordan woman would be envious if she saw me breastfeed

nulnulcat · 02/02/2006 22:41

am i being thick but i really dont get why the strong as an ox comment is so funny?

nulnulcat · 02/02/2006 22:41

nanneh jordan eat your heart out i went to a 36gg when feeding!

Busyalexsmummy · 02/02/2006 22:42

MrsSpoon-i cant speak for them but i were open my tops from the top down as i wear mostly cheapish stretchy v-neck tops-im too embarrassed to get my jelly belly covered in stretch-marks out, saying that when im out-at the mo anyhow with the cold weather-im normally wearing a hoodie or something so even when pulling hoodie up and top down, no-one can see anything, may have to get some b/feeding tops for the summer though-theyre so bloomin expensive though...

nanneh · 02/02/2006 22:43

nul - go girl !

Busyalexsmummy · 02/02/2006 22:44

nulnulcat-cos he said "this ones bottlefed, strong as an ox she is".......formual is cows milk, so nearly on the mark there

nulnulcat · 02/02/2006 22:45

yeah my male friends thought they were fantastic called them my porn star boobs!! missed them when they went though!! kept a bra as a souvenir boyfriend thinks it would make a good hat!!

Busyalexsmummy · 02/02/2006 22:45

christ my spellings going down the pan tonight, i meant wear and formula

nulnulcat · 02/02/2006 22:46

is formula cows milk? my dd cant drink cows milk but was ok on formula? get what the joke is now tho thanks for explaining!! takes me a while sometimes def gave birth to my brain!

MrsSpoon · 02/02/2006 22:47

True Busyalexsmum, each to their own, suppose most b/feeders I've seen have lifted their top. FWIW I always found baby covered the jelly belly quite well.

BTW I will read this thread over the weekend, just not tonight.

nanneh · 02/02/2006 22:48

nul -its amazing what you can do with nursing bras ! I am thinking of making baloons out of mine when I am done with them