Breastfeeding myths overheard in hospital

[hunkermunker]

Woman in the bed next to me was bottlefeeding because she "couldn't be arsed to breastfeed, and they're more settled on a bottle, innit". Er, yours wasn't, love - he cried, you snored through it. And as for the method of getting your newborn baby to take a bottle that your partner had discovered... Heard her telling her mum and dad as if it was hilarious that her DP had said "Finish the fucking bottle, then" and he'd drunk it

Woman in bed opposite me was told to "put the baby to the breast and leave him there as long as it took. It might be two hours. Just let him suck". Well, OK, but might've been nice to actually show her what to do, as she had no idea. Baby had a bottle in his mouth the next morning

Woman who was in the bed after woman opposite left said, "My milk isn't in yet, so I've been giving him bottles until it is". Instead of being told, "Just let him feed, you have colostrum, which is all he needs, your milk will be in soon, I'll help you if you need it" she was asked which formula she wanted

And today I've been told to only offer one breast at each feed and since I had DS2, they've asked me how often he's feeding - am I trying to get him to go three-hourly? Er, no, he's had low blood sugar. Nobody has mentioned feeding on demand to establish supply.

Am and and

Hotmama there were no showers! I was covered in sweat and unmentionable filth. Had to get clean somehow...
Next time (if there is one) it's a private room with ensuite I swear.

yes and I'm with hunker, the staff were prob misinformed rather than deliberately not nice or anything.

Don't want to make any first-timers feel scared (although I am onto my fifth and I still am ()

um - no, the midwifery/obstetrics staff at my hospital were sadistic, cruel, vicious, evil inhuman monsters. I was ill-informed, not them. I'm not out to frighten anyone for the sake of it - but I'm not going to retract the truth either. If you are pregnant for the first time it's a VERY good idea to start checking out your options, touring delivery suites, meeting labour ward staff etc before you go into labour. One thing that's obvious is that standards vary enormously.

recommend homebirth as alternative to hosp. In my experience london hospitals tend to be understaffed and those who are there esp at night are agency staff, often poorly qualified - ie far less committed on the whole to that particular hospital & its patients- I met some truly scary characters in the small wee hrs esp healthcare assistants often with poor english who tbh seemed to be getting payback on the mums for their bad work conditions/hrs/pay...I don't even want to think back to my 1st night in hospital with ds1 save to say it was truly awful (thanks mainly to malice of one particular healthcare assistant whose face still haunts me at times 5 yrs on)and even though had infection, had had forcep delivery after long, long labour with PPH I wanted the hell out as early as possible the next day (my mum, poor, naive thing said I should have stayed there to rest !)
however ds2's birth could not have been more different outside of London - regular staff on the whole - varying quality & kindness but the mw I had at ds's birth was absolutely fantastic - kind, supportive, caring, committed, experienced - everything I had hoped for & failed to get 1st time round in a london hospital.

MOM, really wasn't trying to belittle your horrific experience, just to show the other side of the coin. That said, I know someone who had a horrible birth at the same hospital I was at - she can't drive past the place now because it has such bad memories for her.

I'm all for women being as well-informed as possible though. It gave me the confidence to challenge the consultant who said I couldn't have a waterbirth this time because I had well-controlled with diet gestational diabetes and to refuse formula for DS2 when his blood sugars didn't immediately get back up to normal following his delivery.

MOM - poor you having had such a horrible time. Why don't you put in a complaint to the hospital? It does sound exceptionally bad what you went thro' and you might help others avoid facing a sim sit. I know my local PCT was consulting with the NCT & others on how to improve mat services - could you feed into this if you have something sim locally?

Hospitals should have feedback forms so that you can rate their care and raise any issues you have.

I heard the midwife talking to the woman in the bed diagonally opposite as she was discharged and saying they have to offer a chance to feedback on anything they've not been happy with as people are discharged. The midwife who discharged me didn't say this, but I was struggling to understand her as her English was appalling and I just wanted to go, so I didn't challenge it. I already knew I'd be writing though

Message withdrawn

I agree with MOM - check out other delivery venues, I hated being marooned in hospital for 5 days post op, with staff who were less than helpful ,so i elected to act with my feet for dd2. I looked at Dumfries and Whitehaven hospitals , so i could get a proper view of the resources at the hosp I had dd1 at. Felt much better and got rid of a lot of demons. chose to go to Whitehaven who were sooo much better (dumfries was also much better than hospital1 )40 mile trip rather than 10 miles, but really worth it.

I recommend birth centres as an alternative to home birth. The environment is like a home, a couple of "bedrooms" with pools in them and en-suite bathroom . I could just shut curtains to make the room nice and dark, and even light candles and put on my own cd's (not that I did the last two, I was in too much pain when I arrived, I just got checked to see how dilated I was and then dived into the water !) They are also very pro-BF and more likley to have a relatively experienced mw at hand who can help with the latch, etc. Formula was not mentioned once.

The catch is you must meet quite strict criteria in order to be allowed to have your baby there. There is an age criteria, no. of CS or children you have had before if any, blood pressure, your general health, weight, etc... If you have a very high temp. and high blood pressure when you arrive, for example, they will refuse to take you and you will be taken to the nearest hospital. Also, the only pain relief you can use in the water is gas and air (i.e. not much !).

Sadly, the one where I had my son (Edgware, North London) is in danger of being closed down. There are not many in the country. There is a private one in South London, but the midwife who set it up charges £5 K or something .

Any way, although the first mw was a bit of a silly moo (a bit too sacrcastic for my liking) the 2nd was amazing. Thr minute she arrived she took over, said I had spent too much time in the water (was losing my contractions), massaged my back, said lovely, soothing things, and my son was born outside the water on the floor within 50 minutes of the this 2nd mw taking over.

This is absolute proof to me that the role of the mw is key to a good birth experience.

It helps when they are kind and caring and know exactly what they are doing !

It also helps to have a very detailed birth plan which said EXACTLY what they were allowed to do to me and the baby in the case of an emergency. It said that if I was too confused and in pain to make a decison, they MUST ask my DH's permission and my DH was also under strict orders that they must not do an unnecessay CS on me.

Easier said than done, I know, having read all the terrible experiences here I now realise that I must be one of the few women in the country NOT to have been totally traumatised in or after labour. It's all very shocking really and

I did have problems with BF though once home, and very little BF support from the mw's who visited me at home, but these were community mw's not the ones from the birth centre.

Cathing up....prettybird, more on Norway: I am correct saying Norway never had a bottle feeding culture, and in fact they never had less than 90 per cent pf mothers initiating bf....I have a book about it all, with the stats in it, and my Norwegian midwife friend has told me a lot.Mothers did start using formula when their babies reached about 3 months in the 70s but the situation turned round and they went back to the breast.....and because bottles did not have a grip, the turning round was easier for them.

Bluedog: the other drug you asked about is domperidone.

Re staff shortages: these are real, and it can take time to really support a woman and her bf. However, really, really rubbish info is inexcusable. Giving the right info does not take any more time than giving the wrong info.

thanks Tik Tok - you are a star

Dair point Titok - you know the figures!

It's not the way it was presented to us - but given that this was in Glasgow, with its very low successful b/f rates, it may have suited thier purposes to give it that particular slant, ie that it was possible to move from a bottle feeding culture to a breast feeding culture!

Dair point = Fair point!

Tiktok - you are right about staff shortages - I used to work in the NHS (for a very short period thank goodness) and the shortages are not of just medical staff, but ALL staff. We struggled to find good, competent secretraies in the NHS - please don't be offended if you are competent one working in the NHS, I am just talking about my own experience here but when I worked as a lawyer in the City we had masses of secretaries queing up for a job. Unfortunantly, the public sector (money is one of the reasons) still does not attract the way the private sector does.

Tiktok - while you are still around - have you ever visted a "Baby Cafe" ? I was thinking of setting one up in my part of London, just wanted your views on how successful they are. I will need alot of support from my PCT and BF advisers like NCT, LLL, etc working in this part of London. I am only a lay person when it comes to BF, so obvioulsy I will need a lot of support from the experts

I think Baby Cafes are great. The Baby Cafe website has info about setting one up. However, you can have a breastfeeding support group without the Baby Cafe branding, if you prefer.

Good luck!

prettybird - I know this Norwegian presentation and have seen it myself, and I think it is misleading. They really do not tell you that bf initiation has always been sky high in Norway. They imply all you have to do is get the govt. on board and stop formula advertising, and while all that has a role, they just do not appreciate how entrenched bottles and formula are in the UK.

Thanks tiktok.

Interesting about Norway Tiktok. I was also 'taught' that Norway had a bottle feeding culture at one point but turned it around.

Had a quick google out of interest and found this.

have a look here and scroll down the page till you get to a link to Norway. It says there that in the 1960's, bottle feeding was as common in Norway as it is here now.

An urban myth do you think?

No actual stats on that site, mears, and as I say, I have the book with the table in! It is called 'The Case of Breastfeeding in Norway' published in Oslo 1995, by the Norwegian Breastfeeding Association, and written by Berit Austverg and Johanne Sundby.

In 1970, initiation of bf (actually, 1 week) was at its lowest point, at just over 90 per cent. There was a drop at 3 mths when 38 per cent of women only were bf (this drop had started in about 1920). By 1985 the figures were 1 week 99 per cent, and 3 mths 80 per cent.

So they did turn it round, but it was never as low as here, and they never had a situation where bottle feeding was normal. As the book says, 'there has always been a high percentage of breastfeeding in early infancy'.

Mears - so I wasn't imagining it!

But as I suggested, maybe it "suited" to use an example that demonstrated hat it was possible to turn around from a bottle feeding to a breast feeding culture - even if they were embellishing the point somewhat!

Guess y'all done with this one now, but just thought I'd add another Norway angle:

Met a friend of mine yesterday with 4 wk old baby; he's never mastered the technique of latching on so she expresses milk and feeds it to him with a bottle. Nevermind the dirty looks you in the UK can get if breastfeeding in public - just imagine the dirty looks you get here when bottlefeeding in public !!! poor thing!

Sounds like a upside down parallel universe doesn't it!!

This Norwegian culture thing, could be something to do with them also having long maternity leave for many year now. When I go back to work when DD is 1yrs old, (or whatever age) - I am also entitled to take up to an hour off a day to bf her if necessary (paid, of course!).

The working day here is also different - although the hours are intrinsically the same (office hours are 8-4 rather than 9-5) - they really do mean 8-4 - I mean EVERYONE leaves at 4 - the revolving doors in large companies are like some very busy merrygoround ride at 4pm - and of course this is much more conducive (is that the right word??) to family life. Which all has it's knock on effect I guess . . . ?