Permanent exclusion

[lilsgree]

Can the school do this??
My child has been permanently excluded for shouting at one teacher and supposedly pushing her way through another on her way out of the class. Witnesses who were there say she did not push this teacher and she also claims and swears on God and the bible that she didnt push this teacher.
The school still said in the meeting that there were 13 year 8s who wrote that she did push the teacher but they did not investigate the other students who were there that said she did not.
We have had many calls regarding her behaviour but not towards teachers mostly for breaking basic school rules like eating in the corridors, missing deadlines, and wearing two earring studs which is not allowed in her school.
In the meeting we were given an option to manage move but im not sure if this option is still available for her. How do we get this option because we feel it will be alot suitable than being expelled for something she did not do.

Also my child is black do you think this has anything to do with it?

Six PX panels in a month! That's tough.

When my DD, who is white, was in Y6, school phoned me to tell me she had been involved in a racist incident. Within seconds, I was imagining the conversation I would be having with her, and the invitation I would be giving to the parents of the abused child to sit down with me, DH and DD so DD could understand the impact of whatever she had done. It turned out that DD and a white friend were the victims of the racism. A black boy had sung a rap to them in the yard about white girls being easy. While I felt bad for having jumped to conclusions about my DD, it reminded me that my starting point was not that she could do no wrong. What it also did was prompt me to shift my until then unacknowledged bias that non-white people are always victims and white people the perpetrators.

@IdaGlossop
Six PX panels in a month! That's tough.

I also did 2 at The Primary and have 1 more next week.
I do more than other Governors because I have no DC at either school so its less sensitive if I do it. The other Governors do other things I don't tend to do like school visits.

If the school has rules about behaviour and pupils break those rules without consequences, then others will be encouraged to break rules and the education of all will be disrupted - whether in the classroom or the corridor or not.

Forgive me for saying so but if your daughter is inclined not to follow rules that make no sense to her, is it possible that she has picked that behavour up from you as it sounds as if you also don't think that rules that make no sense - to you - should be followed?

The people that backed her up, are they by any chance her friends?

Think you need to take a step back and reflect that you are the parent and should have dealt with the bad behaviour at an earlier stage. What steps did you implement when other behaviour issues were brought to your attention? There is a saying that there are no bad dogs only bad owners and I firmly believe that this applies to children and parents too. From an early age it is up to us the parents to set an example and instil appropriate behaviour in our children with a clear understanding of what is and is nit expected and the consequences of not following the expected standards.

I found PX panels very challenging because you know outcomes for excluded pupils are rarely good.

I hate them but someone has to do them unfortunately.
In most cases the kids have SN, MH issues, chaotic home lives or often all 3.
I don't sleep well after them, they break my heart in a lot of cases. One boy I just wanted to bring home for a good meal and a decent nights sleep

Anyway OP, the point is to be looking at PX your DD must have shown a pattern of repeated behaviour that impacts others pupils learning and/or is dangerous for her peers or staff. Its not something easy to do or is done other than as a last resort IME.
I genuinely hope that this will be the wake up call you both need and she can do a managed move to another school for a fresh start - one where she actually does as she is asked!

So the teacher lied?

She needs proper sanctions at home.

I am absolutely uninterested in your opinion to be clear. Please don’t respond to me.

Op if the school has massive history of racism, it’s really not the best place for her.
Especially coming from a south London school.

Apologies I read y8 and assumed it was also her year.

How can you possibly know this?

You have missed the part where the child has been moved from a school where she fits in to a school were she stands out.

As an adult I work in an environment were I am often the only black person and only woman this doesn't bother me, as a child and young adult I found such environments extremely stressful and uncomfortable.

This is why those of us who have black and mixed black children are careful on what schools our children go to.

You are the problem op

I am not black and do not have black children so I wouldn't dream of commenting on whether OP's child is being treated diffferently because of her race.
The schools actions may well be partly motivated by race OR OP's daughter is a pain in the arse but it could also be both

No, I realise the OP's DD has changed schools. As you say, those of us who have black and mixed race children are careful in choosing schools. I sent mine to a religious school where the racial mix was predominantly white and the education traditional. There was one racist incident at the secondary school which was dealt with badly, I thought, since the perpetrator was of the same ethnic origin in part as my DC. A lack of understanding of frictions between people of dual heritage and those of full heritage + the 'but black/brown people can't be racist' trope allowed what was racist behaviour to go unchecked.

But I am speaking here from the pov of a teacher, not a parent. Behaviour is not communication, it is simply behaviour and though a change of environment needs to be taken into account other children's education cannot be put in jeopardy for one student in the school - the parents have to parent and the student has to learn to abide by the new rules, at which point it is possible to help them. Causing difficulties for everyone else is no solution to feeling unhappy - communicating that you are unhappy in words helps solve it, but being unhappy in the new environment is not a get out of gaol free card.

If she was emotional and wanted to get out the room quickly she might have barged past the teacher, which isn't the same as deliberately pushing the teacher. So may not be that anyone is lying, just different perspectives on what they saw.

Report the post using the report option, and ask for it to be moved. ❤️

This is not correct.

Where is your evidence? These are government figures.
Sorry, realised you might be saying the OP does do something to control her DD's behaviour. But she is not doing enough or the situation would not have escalated to managed move or permanent exclusion, for these are not easy options for a school to access.

Why not? You have every right to your opinion, and if it is based on factual information every right to state it. You do not have to be something to be able to comment on something. I write about men and battles - I am not a man and have never been in a battle, but I know several men well - and also know they behave quite differently (mostly) in my absence than in my presence - and I have read a lot about battles (because I am interested in battles). There is no reason I should not write about and comment on these things.
You are saying, in effect, that women cannot talk about men's behaviour, for example, because they are not men. That's one huge unfeminist step.😑

op says there have been several calls for behaviour issues. in that case, would you also be talking to your child about behaviour and teacher's need for safety? or just demanding that your kid goes back?

@lilsgree there could also be racism at play but given that you say there have been several calls on behaviour, for your sake and for your child's sake, I would suggest working with the kid and school to understand the root of these problematic behaviours and finding a solution. You can demand reinstatement and she can go back to school but if that behaviour keeps escalating, society might not be so responsive to push backs.
its not easy with kids that age and am sure you are doing your best. Keep working with her and all the best

So many children DONT get PX, the bar is set very very high. For this to be what the school has moved to it has to be quite bad.
As for people suggesting OP ask for an "investigation" this has to happen anyway as part of the PX and a very detailed report will be given to The Governors before they can go for PX. MANY MANY boxes have to be ticked or the PX would be reversed.
OP should have been contacted repeatedly and given information about what has happened, if this is genuinely not the case (not suggesting OP is lying but many parents deny all knowledge of letters, emails etc in order to try and delay/stop the process) then it sounds like process has not been followed and so they can't actually PX.
Fighting a managed move helps nobody and can cause further issues if the child is PX when trying to find another school.