The PESH deli for those who are realising there are real live baybees at the end of this.

[rots]

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, Bay Amaryllis born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8

UPDIFFED
CUNextTuesday, takes no shit from the Daily Mail, due June 28
IggyPiggy, The one who loves BUMSEX, due July 20
CurlyCasper, hospital botherer due July 21 (girl)
Skihorse, cradle snatching web geek, due July 22 (boy)
Carrots, organic hippy hunter, due July 25 (boy)
Cosmosis, the one that likes a good ride, due August 22
backinthebox, she bought a racehorse, due September 6
skatergrrrl, the one that overtook the rest, September ??
VAG, lives in De Nile, due 19 September
silversky, the biggest farter, due 21 October (first baybee)
Honeymoo, no it's not fucking indigestion, due November 2 (boy)
okiecokie, self-confessed control freak, due November 6
SomethingSuitablyWitty, benelux babe, due November 14
ReginaMonologue, big pants, 5* hotels, Bridget Jones due November 20
maswera, jungle hottie - due November (???)
PollyPoo, wants to name her baybee after the dog, The New Messiah is due December 25

So ok this may sound like a know-nothing question... how did she take on sustenance if your milk only came in overnight? How was she fed?

This has been worrying me a bit

Colostrum cunty. Boob snot as it were. It's rich in yellow snotty goodness and they need millilitres rather than centilitres. What do I know? I'm just a stranded turtle-back who never sleeps. "oooh sleep before the baby comes" - "ooooh fuck off, it's too hot to sleep".

casper It all sounds fine and you're doing great and she's lovely and everyfink!

Giving birth in a fucking lavender pot? Are we giong to give birth in a fucking Anne Geddes picture?

I cannot cross my legs for another 5 weeks - not in this heat - it's impossible.

silver I too find that pushing things when my arms are spread or I'm leaning forward is bad. E.g., I can't push a roller chair across the room - dunno what that's about.

I'm off to the outdoor pool today. Looks nice, it's a complex of 5 outdoor pools on the side of a hill (I'm loathe to call it mountain even though the dutch do! ) - I'll sit under a nice tree and read my Marian Keyes until my skin turns radioactive through sunburn and I cry all the way home and make tonight a living hell for jailbait.

yup, colostrum indeed. For me, it wss two days of the clear stuff i'd already seen come out before birth. Now it's yellowy white and abundant. Cue drips on floor if not milked and bsby cries,
ski mine is so Anne Geddes! She Curls up so cutely i'm tempted to pop her in the veg patch if we ever get home.

Still no baby. I'm thinking SIL deserves some kind of medal.

She'd probably prefer a chilled bottle of champagne and a pound of frozen peas!

How are you feeling muser - I notice your tears are a very promising sign!

curly Cool - we look forward to the Curly Geddes flower-pot arrangements - any chance of a lavender baby?

I'm going mad, I thought I'd gone in to labour earlier - I got some cramping in my lower back like a pain I've never felt before.

Fanks tarts. Will have to go easy on the shopping front from now on then.

I was so shattered yesterday was too knacked to do anyfink. Is it normal to be so shagged at this early stage? .

Got to go to work, catch yoos all laters.

Ps muse you is totally normal and clearly totally preggos. FACT.

I am an auntie! Another nephew to add to my collection. Nephews are ace.

And I'm having a little weep at my desk in between feeling sick. Yep. Definitely pregnant.

silver I was fucking useless until about 31 weeks (?) when I got my energy back - 'course I don't really fancy doing much right now in this heat. 28 degrees before 10am? Plz to have a month of snow on the ground?

For those of you with "tricky relationships" with your mothers: I have just received a rather strange email. She's not apologised in so many words but says that after having us (me) she was never the same again. Whilst my father provided financially and didn't do a runner, he wasn't around much due to work - her own mother said "I can't remember how to look after babies" and she never saw a health visitor. She maintains to this day that it was racism (posh English bird in Scotland). What do you think? Is she extending an olive branch? She says I'm so lucky to have jailbait who is so supportive. On the other hand, who does know everything about babies before they arrive? Is it the baby's fault?

This is a special call-out to VAG/reggie - you two have been awfully quiet of late - please regale us with your tales!

mornigns all. too hot. not enough sleep. grump.

Morning all, have discovered am rubbish at being on computers when I could be sitting in the garden....

casp sounds like you doing well, and hurray for being a milk machine hope little curly catches on to the drinking milk thing soon! Have you tried singing 'my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard' to her?!

I was hoping for cunty related news, but sadly none... Apparently most baybeez (statistically) are born 5 days after their due date according to my doc. So am gonna put my money on Friday for my revised prediction

hope the rest of you ok? muse you def sound diffed

I have not much news... But I did have antenatal class with my consultant the other day, which was excellent, he has a fab attitude he is into active birth wiu minimal intervention. He is up for the hypnobirthin thing and does not ever use pethedine. He will do mobile epidurals if a woman asks for one, but he is also up for water births, and says that changing position lots can help. I am feeling very happy about having him.

cos am still missing you, so gonna email anyway

ski how you feeling? Hot and sick sounds grim..

yeay for doc iggs, sounds fab! My team supported active birth, but we did end up with a fair bit of extra monitoring. I had a student holding the monitor taco thing in place whilei moved around moo-ing, and nearly punched her in transition when i deciddd the pressure in my pelvis was her fault and nithing to with a nose up baby trying to get out! And i screamed for an epi in transition. And said i didn't want to have her any more. All perfectly normal apparently at that point in proceedimgs.
We're staying in hosp at least one more night. Baby isa good cup feeder but breast still cause panic. She has gained weight overnight though, so i am happy.

HURRAY! For muser's sis! You is well diffed mrs emitional wreck.

Sounds very much like an live branch to me, ski. Can you try having a heart to heart? The bond between my mum and i has grown so much stronger this week.

Just popped on to post the exact same thing as Cos did. Too hot. No sleep. Poo-bah.

Ski - I have no tails. I want a tail! Would it keep me cool? Or at least the flies away? In Gimlet Household news, we picked up our new car on Saturday!! I feel like a proper grown-up at last! (shaddup!) It's in my name and I have been telling TSF that he may borrow it occasionally to run errands for me (despite the money to buy it coming from his ISA.....) Was tempted to spend the rest of the weekend in the car in the driveway with the aircon on. Instead went for afternoon tea with dear friend yesterday and ate own (impressive) bodyweight in carbs and Earl Grey.

Caspy - lovely to hear from you, keep the updates coming when you have time! Sorry to hear you've been in again but hope it's all settling down now. I too am puzzled by the fact that boobs produce colostrum for a few days which is thinner than milk, and yet there's a panic when a baby feeding exclusively on the "liquid gold" (barf) loses weight, how does one know when it's normal and when it's not?

TSF is after a baby manual. Has anyone bought one, and if so which? (He liked the Haines one until the pages & pages of poo descriptions).

Huzzah for Muser's SIL!

Iggs! Hope you're well & not too sunburnt! Consultant sounds excellent.

CC out of interest have you any idea how long transition lasted? Did you have a lull before you needed to push? Been chatting with doula about this, and we are keen not to hurry things along if it looks like my body is taking a break, but I wonder how realistic this given that I'm likely to be packing my bags and trying to ring a taxi at this stage

Good to know curlygirl is piling the pounds on. I'm sure it will all fall into place - is there a BF counsellor coming to see you?

Darnit - I try to post just once and realise I've missed off most of what I wanted to say...

Ski - your Mum's email does sound a bit like an olive branch - she's trying to share her experiences and explain if not justify her actions. Difficult one to respond to though. Do you think you will respond?

Is there another CnutSweepstake opening this week? I shall go for Saturday. Please to keep your legs crossed until then.

(Also imagined "live branch" as electric cattle prod...)

ski deffo sounds like an olive branch to me. I suppose with becoming a grandmother she is thinking about her relationship with you more.

Congrats auntymuser!!! casp well done on being a milking machine! She?ll get the hang of it eventually she?s only ickle yet.

So anyway, we went to M&P and spend silly money on a really lovely rocking / bouncy chair on sat. Tis beautiful. TGO wants to unpack it already, I do not for fear of it being commandeered by the cats!

I was really struggling with the heat yesterday, for the first time. I think partly because I was tired, still tired from the work thing last week and then had friends birthday bbq on sat night, which was another bed at 12.30 night. Ended up on the sofa yesterday evening in just vest top & bikini bottoms (which is actually how I?d been dressed for most of the day) and had to restrain black cat from attempting to cuddle me, due to his hot water bottle qualities.

Re the colostrum & losing weight thing, the teacher we had in BF class also thought it was ridiculous that they got so wound up on it so early on, she said talking in %s was nonsense, but sadly that?s what they do. If you think about it they are bound to lose weight, because they go from having all they need pumped in to them from the umbilical cord, to having to be fed ? so of course they lose a bit of weight, but they?re designed to lose some!

Your teacher speaks sense our cos. I suppose it is my the inevitable concern that this tiny thing has to be Kept Alive, and if it's not eating properly then that hangs in the balance. But as long as the medics are keeping an eye on things it will always get enough.

I have a couple of cartons of ready made Actimel new born stuff in a cupboard which, even if they are never used, bring me reassurance in case of problems. Small price to pay for peace of mind IMO.

iggs consultant sounds amazing!

cassie poor you, still not settled Did you have pethedine? It could be why she's sleepy now but I would have thought it would have worn off by now. You may want to consider, if you've not done it, speaking to a breastfeeding counsellor (eg Little Angels or NCT - NCT number is 0300 330 0771) who may give you some ideas as to how to get her to feed more effectively although you're doing a brilliant job expressing for her. I was told yesterday in our BF class that even if a baby is well latched and awake and hungry, they will take the same amount from the breast in a much longer time than from a bottle (or putting it another way, what takes you an hour to express can be drunk within 5 minutes) because bottles dispense fast, so don't let that put you off. I guess it's the same for cups.

All will be fine though and I saw the video - she's just beautiful .

cunty apparently, from my memory of my first antenatal classes (which is a while ago!), a newborn's stomach is about the size of a walnut so the tiny amounts of colostrum you produce in the first few days are more than enough to fill them.

Sorry X post with everyone.

they had little balls in our class the size of a newborn, 5 day old and 10 day old tummies - newborns the size of a marble!

Right, I finally have my laptop and hopefully will be able to type without any more "live branches"!

rotty no we didn't have anything more than gas and air. The only problem is that the baby is too young and just not getting the hang of it. Looks like when she appeared to be feeding well the first two days she was not getting a full mouthful of nipple and aerola and actually wasn't taking enough on board. But she looked healthy and was behaving "normally" - lively on waking and happy to sleep after her supposed feeds. But we now know her tiredness was nought to do with being full and more lack of energy (and latterly dehydration).

It's looking more and more like she was not ready to come and a urine infection triggered her arrival. so it's no wonder she's not ready yet.

re BF counsellors, I have the most wonderful team of "old school" midwives, who will try every trick in the book before giving into the Docs' when they want to top up with formula. I have gleaned so much from their experiences just overnight last night. who knew your breasts were able to cool in order to cool down your baby? Amazing!

Thanks all, again , for your support

COME ON CUNTY! no idea about transition - time all went to pot, but i don't remember being able to rest. By that point the pressure down there was so great any position that involved gravity was pure evil and I just wanted to lie down on my left. But then her heart slowed, and waters had brought meconium, so they had to move me.... and my temper struck!

BTW , SFF has reminded me that the only reason I didn't get an epi in the end was that the anaesthatists drugs dude was in theatre.

Oh, and I did NOT expect to have the G&A removed from my possession for the pushing stage apparently my face was a picture...

SFF is here now, so will come back later.

lol @ losing your rag True BESH fighting spirit!

rots he said best form of pain relief is to deliver the baby... Ha ha...

casp am well impressed that you did g & a alone. I hope I can too and the midwives sound great.

ski I too meant to comment on the live branch and I agree it does sound like it.

vag I too ate own body weight in carbs when we had a cake fest at my house on sat. Is much fun. Car sounds growed up...

caspy Hope it's going well today with the feeding. You are doing the right thing. Go babycasp.

Could we please have a baby on this thread which does not involve mother and baby returning to hospital afterwards? (cunty, I'm looking at you.)

ski Mum and Dad are still here, leaving this Friday. Tbh I'm not sure what we're going to do without them. Even MrP has said this! There has definitely been a thawing of the relationship, but we've not exactly had any open discussions directly on the topic.

My advice re your mum's 'live' branch is to just make small steps. A little acknowledgement in a slightly different tone than you would usually use will probably send pretty big signals. I wouldn't advise attempting a really big emotional connection all of a sudden. It might be too much of a shock for you both (plus you are hormonal so your emotions can't really be trusted just now!). Small steps are best I think.