The PESH Deli - where black-humoured diffed BESHes turn to hormonal mush.

[CurlyCasper]

If you don't like the title, tough. I'm still talking

BESH BABYWIN STATS

This isn?t a fucking list ? right?

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, Bay Amaryllis born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April 12

UPDIFFED
Ponymum, the one with the worst hips, due mid June
CUNextTuesday, takes no shit from the Daily Mail, due June 28
IggyPiggy, The one who loves BUMSEX, due July 20
CurlyCasper, the ginger with the dodgy joints due July 21 (girl)
Skihorse, cradle snatching web geek, due July 22 (boy)
Carrots, organic hippy hunter, due July 25 (boy)
Cosmosis, the one that likes a good ride, due August 22
Pandora, She's got wings, due September 6
skatergrrrl, the one that overtook the rest, September ??
VAG, lives in De Nile, due 19 September
Honeymoo, puppy lover, due November 1
silversky, the biggest farter, due 21 October (first baybee)
okiecokie, self-confessed control freak, due November 6
SomethingSuitablyWitty, benelux babe, due November
ReginaMonologue, must-get-the-goss-from-ski, due November 20

Hope you get to talk to someone soon Cunty! Hope you can get some advice and reassurance asap!

namechange - I hope your scan will also be very reassuring. I can only tell you that I was also spotting (light brown) for about 2 or 3 days when I was 6 weeks and though it upset me a lot, it was absolutely nothing in the end: hope it will be the same for you! If you are nervous and scared, I wouldn't go alone - you could use some support - but maybe get them to wait outside as ski suggests. In the meantime, have a nice walk in your PJs - but don't go shopping ! (don't I remember some featherlight "human interest" news story a few weeks ago about PJs being banned from Tesco or something?!)

Yes ski - house taxes in Belgium are quite simply a nightmare. You just have to detach and keep reminding yourself how great the healthcare system is (ie: the taxes do have some effect at least.)

Baybee is lying in a very uncomfy (for me) position today... yesterday it was fine - today = rubbish... odd how that happens... am clock watching..

I am about to leave (have to work tomorrow for a bit so why not!)

Hope to hear from cunty will will probably be offline at home for a bit until someone lays a broadband line into hicksville

Then again, I can take my dongle to the old house and chat when I am meant to be cleaning and clearing...

Congrats to Cas on the new house malarkey!

Good luck to Cunty for the check up - and about time too! If noone is there when you phone for MW just stand by your front door and yell. Works for me when I want OH to come in from his shed.

I win in the stamp duty stakes so far - not saying how much, but the tax we paid for a 2 bedroom house could have BOUGHT us a 2 bedroom house in another part of the country. We are never moving house again. Ever.

Went to toddler group today, and skinny other preggo is just starting to look about the size I was before I got pregnant. She is feeling fat now. I'm still struggling to see anything like a bump on her!

cunty is not doing great. She's been admitted with a urine infection and because her kidneys aren't great they're keeping her in. She's sending headbuts and violence to all of you and she hopes to be released tomorrow.

Oh poor Cunty - sending her wedgies and piglet-pulls. Will be thinking of her thhiweekend. Thanks for letting us know, Ski.

I've told her if they don't release her tomorrow I'm going to rally you London girls and send you along to the word to embarrass the arse off her!

which establishment is she in?

I'll put details on the other place.

Can I tag along when you go 'Hello, where's Cunty? I'm her mate VAG'

I realise I have no frigging hope of catching up all on the goss that I have missed this week on this thread....

Poor TuesdayBird hope she is ok. Ski you crack me up "released" make it sound like she has gone to jail!

What's new with me? Had my 16wk check up and all is hunkydory. MW is quite funky. Secret rock chick I think! Though she is only temp so will get another one in June. I seem to be going through them quicker than I do hot dinners. MW told me I have strong stomach muscles - to which Husband pitched in with "that may be so but she has got a very low pain threshold" . If I had been close enough I think I would have shown him a low pain threshold that is for sure.

Got some other shiz going on equine wise which made me blow a bloody gasket. Prob seem no big deall to you guys but I hit the roof. In fact, I am still there.

So do us a favour, help get me down and often I find bribery works well for me... spesh if its the edible sort.

I realise I have no frigging hope of catching up all on the goss that I have missed this week on this thread....

Poor TuesdayBird hope she is ok. Ski you crack me up "released" make it sound like she has gone to jail!

What's new with me? Had my 16wk check up and all is hunkydory. MW is quite funky. Secret rock chick I think! Though she is only temp so will get another one in June. I seem to be going through them quicker than I do hot dinners. MW told me I have strong stomach muscles - to which Husband pitched in with "that may be so but she has got a very low pain threshold" . If I had been close enough I think I would have shown him a low pain threshold that is for sure.

Got some other shiz going on equine wise which made me blow a bloody gasket. Prob seem no big deal to you guys but I hit the roof. In fact, I am still there.

So do us a favour, help get me down and often I find bribery works well for me... spesh if its the edible sort.

Balls - double post. Spot the knob.

silver My stupid fucking nag got herself cast in the box on Weds night and has hurt her shoulder. FFS, only just paid the last vet's bill! Oh... and it was the second time I'd arranged for a new girl to ride her - yep, last time she was going to come was when the stupid nag split an artery.

boxer You could say "sorry, ponycunt, carrotsarenothteonlyvegetable and reginamonologue can't make it."

I have a friend who is getting married. She is a reluctant bride - she loves her man dearly, but is a bit allergic to frilly things and bridezillas. She was googling wedding cakes in her own inimitable style when she came across something that tickled her, and sent me a link to this website a while back, and I've just remembered it. I don't know what it is about the PESHes that made me think of it, but I thought it might appeal to you. I read loads of it in one sitting, and have never laughed so much at a website. So get yourself a huge caipirinha with an umbrella, and enjoy!

Don't talk to me about horses. Big horse has discovered the 9000 acres of forest is only one quick lean on the field fence away. New horse (whoops) is arriving tomorrow and my strange livery person is having a fit about it. I keep my gee-gees at home so as not to have to deal with yard busybodies, but this lady asked if she could use my spare stable very nicely, and she keeps her horse neatly and helps out with mine. But right at the moment she is doing my head in a bit. She is wanting to use the paddocks I am resting so we have grass later in the summer. I have told her 'no,' but she keeps on going 'go-on-go-on-go-on-go-on.' etc. Driving me mad!

On a different note - what has happened with Pony? Has she had a little, ahem, infiltration too?

ski - horses eh? Who would have them? Us bloody mugs that's who.

How did she split an artery??

Husband nearly left horse in the stable with a shavings fork over night. Clever? Certainly not.

Its not the horse that is the ishoo. To some of ya, you'll think what the eff is the problem, its no big deal, but to me it is. Its my bloody horse. Nuff said. End of. Deal with it. Move along.

Hopefully I have dealt with the matter and that is the end of that. We shall see.

Any news from the baybee winners that have cashed in their vouchers and have an actual real life baybee please?

Box tell her no means no, if she don't like it - TOUGH.

Some people are just stoopid and selfish.

She'll soon be moaning that her 'orse has nothing to eat and she is spending a fortune on hay in the middle of summer!!

Hate to say it. Horsey people are the worse.
There I have said it.

silver Oh running around the paddock with the others and someone trod on the coronet at the top front of the hoof. Cue a chunk of hoof missing and her losing more blood than I've ever seen an animal lose in an area which cannot be stitched... I thought she was going to be sausages. Thank fuck I'm not actually trying to loan her out because every time I get someone up to ride she does something stupid. Idiot. Have you killed him yet? I let jailbait potter around with her because he is learning... and I just bite my tongue when he tries to put her headcollar on upside down because he's brilliant when I need someone to be there for the trimmer and she gave the wanker buyers an earful last year.

boxer My stoopid nag is covered in scars because she has no respect for fencing. I have seen her smash through a wooden gate on multiple occasions. I have seen her go THROUGH barbed wire trying to get to boys and I've watched her lean against electric fencing until it simply "Popped". The only thing which ever stopped her was the 6' steel mesh fencing I had put in at my old house! When I rented a field from a local farmer I got a call from the forrestry commission to come and fetch as she was bothering tourists. Fecking eejit..

ski I remember now.

Husband is not bad with things, he is getting there, tho he does it for me and not for any other reason, ie - interest level in horses is zero unless he is riding and then all he wants to do is pitch up ride and go home.

I maybe going out for grub tonight, which is nice as I am starving. Have def put weight on round my thighs which is always attractive.

Oh great the dog as just walked by me and let one rip. Luckily my wind functions have reduced somewhat and I no longer feel the need to be as "vocal" in that dept any more though I do have the odd untimely lapse. Usually blame it on the dog or horse but am struggling to find someone to blame when it happens in the office?

Hello dahlinks, did you miss me???

Hope you are all ok?

Bit of a question, we did a big walk the other day in the Lakes, about 8 miles, and a fair bit of scrambling up on the tops - when we got down my hands and wrists were all swollen. It went down within a couple of hours, but was just a bit surprised by it - anyone had this?

In other news, TGO felt artie move today for the first time

I have told her no. End of. Ski Ginger sounds quite a lot like big horse. He had to have physio last year after he lifted a field gate off with his leg, just to see what would happen. But he is a bloke - ginger doesn't have that excuse! Hope her foot is looking better soon - is it the same one as before, or is she going round them in turn?

Has noone looked at my cake link? Go on, it's fooking hilarious!

boxer No, she's bust off-fore this time. Which is great in the respect that at least I know last month's injury isn't giving her gyp as she's having to put all her weight on it. She was almost hopping lame yesterday, but was eating, drinking, moving around the box and ears pricked. Stooopid.

cossie Of course we missed you! I've not had any swelling yet - but isn't it called oedema? or something like that - and very, very common!

Hello Peeps. Anyone for some pate and hard liquor?

Hope cunty is ok. What a pity Fanny can't come to the hossie along with VAG and Regina. Hope you are getting good care and giving the nurses a suitably hard time.

caspy Congrats on the house! And please note: No Climbing On Ladders At All, by Order of Fanny.

ski / cossie / rots - Boo hoo, so sorry I can't join you in Newcastle. Have an extra martini for me please. ski I'm thinking that if it's a rough day on the boat you'll have two excuses for puking. (Please hit me if jokes about your puking aren't funny anymore.)

boxy Re your question: it's me. Shh. I looked at the cake link. I actually like the first cake. Why the hell did they think that needed censoring?

I had my consultant appt yesterday. The c-section is now all booked in. I am now on daily heparin injections until the big day. The worst news is that they won't permit any c-section patients to have a private room "for safety reasons". I am NOT looking forward to that, given how helpless I am and how much extra help I need, the humiliation of getting ot the loo, etc. Oh well, I have a few weeks yet to develop a special non-PESH sunny, positive attitude about the whole thing.

I am currently feeling like crap. Have a horrible sore throat and appear to have lost my voice. The honey and lemon special isn't really helping.