Due March 2010 - just because I'm pregnant at Christmas doesn't mean I'm a taxi driver

[annamama]

... new thread for oldies and newbies due in March! ...

74slackbladder You are particularly welcome as you share a due date with me. No being a bad girl and having him/her early! Sorry you're having SPD - what a nasty trick of nature that one is, esp with a 3 yr old.

Scooby Eeeeeek at your Braxton Hicks being something that serious. You poor thing . And as for the GBS - when I went for my early scan they asked if I wanted to be tested for GBS. I said Yes of course!! (for family reasons that I'll not burden you with) she looked me in the eyes and said "Are you sure? Because there's a good chance that nothing bad would happen with it, and if it comes back positive that really restricts your birth options. Yo might prefer not to know!!!" Ie "Keep shtum and home birth/pool birth/not-being-strapped-to-the-bed-birth are all still within your grasp" Strikes me that if they're happy to be that cavalier, it can't really but SUCH a big issue. But this is tinpot York District we're talking about. Hope you win your battle against the trust!

Scooby- eek at mw and birth pool not being cleaned and generally annoyingness of enforced mat leave (says she who had to start at 24 weeks) Hope you find a solution/new mw!!

74 welcome- sorry about your SPD. There is an SPD sofa if you fancy joining some of us there.

Anna- I know of one Isobel (16) and it's the name my brother plans for his baby (if it';s a girl) in the US. We would have wanted it but our surname begins with I, so I'm having an Annabel instead!

I am bored bored bored with the snow now. I am fed up of not leaving the house, even to get into the garden for some fresh air.

Morning all
welcome 74 i was born on the 26th march so you and arcadie have a good date there!!
All fine here, i also cannot be ARSED doing with work at the moment, i quite like the people there and everything, and it's been interesting with the snow etc, but just can't get into gear with it all. I've even turned down an opportunity for a new role which they are trying out, the interview is supposed to be today but it was a total joke as to whether i'd actually get to DO it since i finish with them in a couple of weeks!! i'm all for not discriminating against pg women but really, they were practically bending over backwards to make me do it!!

some good news our end, remember my friend with the CVS test last week? provisional tests have come back all clear - SUCH a relief. i think at pg no 4 she was just a bit - OFFS could we PLEASE have some good luck at some point?!! anyway so that's good.

Snowed again last night. have LOADS to do here so will get on (and can smell something ominous coming from DD's direction)

Welcome 74slackbladder, brilliant name Oh the dreaded manflu... And that SPD business sounds awful, hope at least your DS isn't causing you too much trouble!

Pacific - I didn't read your post properly, sounds horrible to have to worry about such possibly serious things... but hopefully (and very likely) it's nothing! It sounds like you're trying not to worry too much as there's nothing you can do right now anyway, typical that your DH is worrying more, bless him.

MummyElk - good news about your friend! Something ominous, haha, mmm I'm so sick of toddler poo! Baby poo is nicer I think even though it can be messy.

Was reading in my pg book about birth plans, I don't think I will write one this time. Me and DH will just communicate our wishes and that's it! I think a birth partner can be a good help in that they support what you say. For example at one point this doctor was talking about CS last time I gave birth, I moaned a weak "nooo" and DH said nicely but assertively "we'd really like to try the normal way first". (DD was finally born with ventouse)

I haven't even looked on the birth announcement thread, too scary, and to be honest when some of you start to give birth I think I might not read about it until after I've given birth myself. It kinda feels like I just wanna concentrate on my own birth... anyone know what I mean?

thanks all for warm welcome. houseboud AGAIN due to snow. agree with you all that is is getting a bit dull now. however, have DH 'working' from home aswell which has its plusses and minusses. plus side he will take ds out for a bit of fresh air at some point but minus is that the house is not our own as it normally would be, bit frustrating but sill nice to have him here i guess.

arcadie, at one stage we were given due date a week earlier but i'm not buying that...though having said that i am wondering just how much bigger my bump can get...anyone else on pg#2 finding its all rather alarmingly large compared to last time?

Snow, snow bl*y snow - when will this stop - took me two hours to get DS to nursery today and was very late for work. Actually it is a miracle we made it into the car at all since DS had the most enormous melt down because he wanted to watch Roary the Racing Car and it had already finished, he refused to get dressed, took off every article of clothing I set out for him and then peed his pants - deep joy. Does anyone else have toddlers who have gone a bit weird at the thought of the iminent arrival? DS is insanely clingy and throwing tantrums about everything - I hope it doesn't last!

Scooby - It's horrible to think that the birthing pools may not be cleaned properly. A midwife warned me recently about the birthing balls in hospitals too. She wasn't convinced that they clean those much. Yuk.

Annamamma - I'm actually excited about hearing about the first to go into labour/give birth in our forum. I want to hear all about it! Perhaps it's because I have no children yet, I don't know.

Yep, EmLouT, I'm also wondering if my toddler's sudden uber-clingness and spectacular tantrums are to do with his sister's imminent arrival. It is worrying me. On the plus side, I got him to have a beaker of milk this morning (rather than a BF) with no fuss at all. Yay!!

Tried to get into London this morning. Set off to the station in boots and with walking poles (more snow overnight). Caught train OK. Very pleased. Train then terminated at Basingstoke and SW Trains promptly cancelled all London-bound trains. So, now back at home again. My DH normally works at home and, just as you're finding it a bit strange to have your DH at home all day, 74slackbladder, I think my DH is finding odd to have me at home. He keeps saying how the country hasn't managed to get back to normal after Christmas.

I think I understand what you mean about needing to concentrate on your own birth, anna. I was a bit like that last time, too: had several friends who gave birth in the months before me and I felt like putting my fingers in my ears and saying "nooooo!" when they described their births (whether good experiences or not). Maybe we should reserve the finer details of our birth experiences for the post-natal board and just post on this one to say LO born.

Meant to say yesterday, Pacific, that I really hope you're OK. Apart from anything else, it can't be at all nice to have something like that at the back of your mind at what should be such a happy, anticipatory time.

a minor dilemma for your minds to work over and advice gratefully received. NOTHING to do with babies..... Would post of AIBU or somesuch but the friend in question is a MNer

Before Christmas a friend: Emma gave a very close friend of mine: Chrissie a lot of presents to distribute amongst Chrissie's friends who'd helped out after Emma had a baby. I'm 90% sure I saw one in the pile for my DS. It's now , what, 3 weeks after Christmas and no such present for DS has been passed on by Chrissie. The dilemma: Do I say anything? Not particularly bothered about "getting stuff" for my kids. They have plenty and if she's found a better home for his present - good, but the possibility is that Emma is wondering why no mention has been made of present by me and may be feeling a bit miffed why no thanks have been given. I am only 90% sure that there was a present for DS so do I risk looking like a tit / greedy cow or do I just leave it?

Thanks if you can be bothered to read let alone post.

*No animals were hurt in the changing of these people's names.

Arcadie - I think you should say something to Emma along the lines of: 'I heard that you gave some presents to Chrissie recently, I think that's a great idea! I'd like to do the same for friends who have helped me. Would you mind if I gave the presents to you to distribute?'

If she gave your child a present, hopefully she will home in on the 'I heard that...' bit, and will ask if you didn't receive the present. She can then chase up the missing present with Chrissie - it may have been mislaid.

Annamamma - I have also decided not to bother with a birthplan and play it by ear. Neither of the pervious births bore any relation to the natural waterbirth I was wanting (that would be me screaming for the epidural).

It is definitely worth exploring your options if you have anything other than a normal delivery planned. DS1 was breeach and a CS was advised. The midwives and consultant were happy to support me in my decision to have a natural birth birth however they made certain criterion at which they would insist I had a CS. In fact the head of midwifery even changed her rota to ensure that a senior experienced midwife was always present for the 10 days preceeding my due date as younger midwives no longer have the experience for breech deliveries. As it was I failed to meet the 1 cm per hour and in fact after 8 hours of contractions hadn't even made it to 3 cm accepted the CS.

Second time round I wanted a VBAC and they do't normally offer a waterbirth for VBAC. Again I met with the head of midwifery and she was supportive and cleared the way for me. As it was I only lasted a couple of hours before wanting real pain relief!

This time I will go for a natural delivery, ask for the waterbirth if it's free but me far me open minded to medical advice on offer!

I was very attached to the ball in both labours - at bothe the hospitals these were unwrapped from sterile wrappers so here in surrey the balls are sterile.

Arcadie - difficult. Personally I would say anything unless I was very close to Emma.

arcadie just have an open honest conversation with Chrissie, make it clear it's not an issue but you wanted to be sure so that you can say thank you or not to Emma, just raise it in a casual non-news kind of way and it won't be an issue, blame your preggie brain / mum-nesia on it if you're wrong

elm My DS is also behaving oddly, getting out of bed after we've just settled him down, some baby speak and waking at night - bless him, only mummy cuddles seem to work. Can't believe you persisted in the car for 2 hours, I would have turned back after 30 mins

DS1 (nearly bloody 5) has started on babying behaviour. He lies across my lab pretendign to be a baby. Given his size I'm nto encouraging.

DS2 (2.5) hasn't got a scooby doo what's happening. he keeps pointing at my boobs and saying'baby tubs' in here. I keep pointing to my belly instead but he's not to be deterred!

Mumbot aaaah honesty... there's a saying about it being some kind of good policy right!?
BPM Not close to Emma - she's a friend of Chrissie's more than mine.

Afternoon ladies

Great to see lots of activity on here, though apologies as I do read all the posts (I check in every day) but I then forget things when it comes to actually posting...but welcome to the newbies - the more the merrier .

Definitely another person sick of the snow here - bring on the great defrost I say! It's bad enough just being pregnant (and tottering like an old person on icy footpaths) but special sympathy to Puree (and any other SPD sufferers) as it must be awful to be completely housebound because of the weather.

Arcadie hmm, what a dilemma/potential minefield. Since you helped Emma out I would assume there is a pressie there for your DS. You could try something like "Emma, I heard from friends that you were giving out presents to those that helped you after X was born and I think it's such a lovely idea. I hope I remember to be as generous in the future!". Or you can just say nothing...which may be better overall (but I'd also worry that she was wondering why I hadn't thanked her).

Pacific I'm not sure what to say about your appointment, other than I of course really hope the results are just an odd pregnancy thing and don't herald anything more serious. It must be so worrying, though I can see why you'd be the one worrying less than your DH. Anyway, feel free to write about it anytime you want on here...we're here to listen .

Manda Glad to hear the trial is moving along at a good clip. Hopefully it means you'll get at least one day off this week before having to show up again on Monday for week two. Good thing you're not a major wee-er though (am sure wee-er isn't a word but have no idea what to call the increased weeing that pregnancy brings ! Though I'm also not a major wee-er - currently sleep right through the night (bar the odd bouts of random insomnia) and not looking forward to when baby starts to descend and really press on the bladder...).

Sariska what an attempted journey into work! A colleague who sits near me made it in from Woking and is now looking at major delays in getting home (bet she wishes she hadn't bothered since she'll have to leave pretty early!).

Anna I know what you mean about wanting to focus on your own birth...I do love a good birth story (Shroomer I suspect this is because I'm a first timer!) but at the same time I need to remind myself that I'm not anyone else iykwim...that just because X had Y happen to her doesn't make me likely to have the same thing happen. I think it's because I tend to hear only the more complicated/stressful stories and I've decided I kind of need to zone them out...

Scooby god, so sorry to hear that things are so stressful for you though good thing someone's taking things a bit more seriously now. Is there anyway you can bring your own pool? Things like a birth pool in a box can be picked up for relatively cheaply so may be an option? Also, I have to give my employer 28 days notice to change the maternity leave start date as well but I imagine this would be overridden in the event that I had medical advice to take my leave earlier. I think asking for a month's notice is pretty standard but I doubt it's something they can be inflexible about at the risk of being discrimatory (or something). I know everyone's different, but your twin's experience (and your BHs) would make me think hard about how late I worked...

Pixie well done on packing the hospital bag!

Ang you're like an old pro with the personal shout outs

Big waves to everyone else. Can't remember who mentioned it but am also so sick of work. Cannot seem to pretend to be get motivated [caitni wanders off muttering "only 16 working days left after today, only 16 working days left..."]

Hmm we could have a snoop and see what other antenatal threads have done... but I would assume once your baby is born you want to go straight on to a post-natal board for lots of baby talk, but you would of course also come back here and see what's going on with the people who are still waiting! And vice versa.

So, I agree with Sariska that we should put stories about our births on the post-natal thread, so that those who don't want to read it yet won't have to...

But it's no big deal, whatever, I'm just being silly really! HELP! A baby will come out through my vagina again! Well hopefully anyway.

I am feeling quite positive though, really focusing on having a great birth! I hope we all do!

Arcadie - I would just say to Chrisse "oh by the way, those presents, was there not one for DS?" in a surprised voice. But that's maybe me being swedish, we are more direct than you polite english people!

I found the birth ball in the hospital didn't have much air in it... maybe NHS savings? so will probably bring my own.

Arcadie - I would just ask straigh out - might jog her memory.

Off to fight the snow and try to pick DS up - the bit I hate the most is the fact that he won't let me carry him anywhere so we spend ages trudging over the ice. Is it wrong of me to turn up at the nursery with a mini croissant as a bribe to make him let me carry him to the car without a battle?

Reading all the posts about everyone being fed up and unmotivated at work make me soooooo glad that i decided to take the gp's advice and get signed off. various work things happening this week/next week that i was involved in planning/organising of that normally i would be having sleepless nights about that i can firmly put out of my mind! what a luxury.
just glad to be in this situ and feeling lots of sympathy for those of you still trudging to work in snow etc.
instead, i have time to loiter on here and also actually give some thought to the fact that our family is about to become 4 rather than three which till now has been bottom of a long list of things i need to do.

wow - it's been ages since I've checked in ... either that or you ladies have been very busy posting! Have just spent at least 1hr skimming previous pages to catch up

I'm so glad I've started ML far earlier than originally planned - Monday morning, woke up in Paris on day 3 of a celebratory city trip with DH . It was lovely, but cold. However I did notice that despite the snow, freezing temps, etc France and Paris did seem to continue to function as expected in the winter. Why is it that England seems to struggle to cope?

Haven't started to pack my hospital bag, but DH and I did get into John Lewis yesterday morning for our nursery advisory appointment to order cot, pram, change-top storage unit plus all the other various bits 'n pieces. I figure once the storage unit arrives and I've got somewhere to put all the baby-related stuff I can start seriously nesting!

Reading about those of you seriously inconvenienced by the snow has made me super glad I'm in central-ish London ... means I still get excited by the novelty of waking up to a white street scape. But one friend from work is currently 9mths pregnant with her 2nd DS (due literally any moment), is snowed in suburban Surrey and the best her local council can do (apparently) is 'promise toget back to her within 20 working days'. WTF?

arrrgggghhhhh!!!! selfish post ladies!!!!

can i not have anything run smoothly atm!!!had the hospital on the fone today, apparently i had some urine sent off to the lab and it had signs uti which has grown two types of bacteria, apparently, one of which they are not too concererned about but the other is very rare and can only be treated by intravenous injections 3x a day they want me to be an in patient for at least 3 days oral ab's are not safe in preg apparently (its no risk to baby but is to me and my health) they cannot tell me where is has come from, why i have it, (no its nothing i have done) its name is PSEUDOMONAS- ANYONE GOT ANY KNOWLEDGE OF THIS?

i have atm refused the treatment as Rosie goes back to birmingham childrens hospital tomorrow for her second op and i must be with her, how the hell can i become an inpatient when my daughter needs me? really stuck don't want to risk my baby or my health but what the hell am i meant to do- BTW i have no signs of a uti at all so no idea what to do! if i felt rotten it would make the decicion easier)
the doc has said that for now its fine they want another sample and will re test if bacteria is still there then i will have to have the treatment if its gone then all will be fine,

arggggghh it never rains but it pours over me!!!

Anna and IWCAS as the person who is likely to be last turning out the lights on this thread (14 days over is a norm for me which puts me on 9th April EDD!) I would say DEFINITELY post an announcement on the Antenatal thread (maybe there could be a list... ) and post fuller birth stories on the Postnatal thread. Like I say I'm probably going to be the last one switching over to the Postnatal and I really don't mind reading a couple of threads a day!!!

i would like to hear how people get on (in brief) on here before switching to post natal.
last time around i was the last of my nct group to give birth and had heard all seven pretty awful and long birth stories before going into labour. for some odd reason it didnt really seem to bother me. lucky for me i went on to have a much easier time of it than the others...the way this pg has gone though i'm not sure i will be so lucky this time around.

Hi all

Thanks to you all for your words of advice/support today. Sorry to have been so me me me!!

Heres the update;

My employers maternity provision states I have to give them the 28 days notice of start date so going sick is my only option. If I'm off sick when 36 weeks hits ( Spot on Sariska!!)then sick automatically reverts to maternity leave. Anyhow, spoke to the unhelpful midwide this morning - her words of advice were 'theres nothing I can do you'll have to the see the GP!' I very calmly also explained to her after her 'help' that should anyone else be diagnosed with group b strep, for her info (promise wasn't stroppy!), the consultant had told me they had never yet had a lady use the pool due to the trusts policy based on hygeine/health and safety- midwife helpfully responded - ' well thats new - they used to! This despite the consultant working there since I was probably in nappies!!! Is it any wonder I don't now trust half these people!! So rang for GP appointment which I got today ( for those of you with very long memories - she also doesn't have a history of being helpful!!) Explained my predicament and conflicting advice (also my twins GP so knows history) She whined about not really being appropriate to sign me off sick for being pregnant and then proceeded to do just that for 4 weeks saying 'well if I don't and it comes early you'll always say it was becuase you were still at work' I felt so supported!!! Honestly - I promise you all it's not me - they are all just a little unhelpful up here!!!

So yes, signed off now for 4 weeks which takes me to 36.5 weeks. Told to come back and see her again then.

To those that suggested hiring the pool - I like the theory- I shall see how the consultant gets on and if it's a no I'll ask her if I'm allowed to bring one of my own. Not liking the observations from shroomer re hygeine of birthing balls - It didn't relate to the RVI did it????? I can take my own!!!! I shall have to spy on my tour next weekend!!

arcadie - I kinda half get your midwife's advice re not finding out about group b strep. I had no choice as it came back from a test they gave me when I fell down the stairs. Not convinced about the 'nothing bad will happen' observation though. If you have it the odds of passing it on to baby are something like 1:300. If child does then get it the then odds of it being fatal for baby are then 1:10. Once you know and have the AB's risk drops to about 1:6000!!! Now I know I canlt ignore. Huge numbers never know they have group b strep though and use the pools unwittingly with no problems at all (so whoever mentioned that - soz! - you're spot on - far greater risk from the unknown than me!!)Oh and arcadieI like Caitni's suggestion re gift dilema best- subtle!!

mummyelk - so pleased for your friend - what a relief!!

Welcome newbies!!

Sorry to those with toddler problems I can't offer any pearls of wisdom - ask me again in 3 years.

On the birth story/announcement theme i think it would be nice to have the announcements here where everyone can pick them up - but just 'he/she arrived/weight and all well - no gory details!!

sarah I can't believe your bad luck - poor you. Is there no way of getting the meds at Rosies bedside at her hospital?? Completely understand your dilema but look after you too. I'd get the results rechecked too (as you are) if you are feeling ok- maybe they got switched!!

sariska- what a crap journey- medal for trying though.

IWCAS Can't believe your birth centre issue - needs challenging NOW if you wanna got there - clearly isn't reasonable.

Sorry for the mammoth post - just having a catch up. Should be far more organised now I'm off with my feet dutifully up.

Sorry I can't find the name of the poster who rightly remembered the 'work problems' I'd had months ago when I broke the news. Yes, I don't want to give work any excuse to think bad of me by going sick but you know what - baby got to come first. I know in my heart I will get no thanks for staying til ome week before. So well commented and thanks xx