Where's the April thread gone??

[Rtuff]

Can someone put a link to it for some reason i cannot find it!!

I don't want to speak too soon but I think that the iron tablets may have just started to make a difference. I have been on them for 2 weeks and since yesterday I have been able to make the journey to ds's school without having to sit down in the middle of the pavement. I also noticed today that I was able to complete simple household chores without feeling like I was dying!

It has been so bad that even walking into the kitchen to make myself a sandwich as felt like torture. I'm hoping that I have finally turned a corner as I was beginning to feel very embrassed that I was finding this pregnancy so tough.

I think spring is on the way as well. It hasn't been so painful getting up in the morning when the alarm goes off and I think I have even heard birds singing. Being pregnant through the long old winter has been hard but I think we have chosen the best time of year to have our babies. It will be lovely having our little ones when the nights are getting longer and the trees are starting to blossom again.

Hi all, some very good tips for first timers thanks.
Just had a 33+ check up with Midwife and blood pressure still creeping up along with a few other symptoms i thought nothing of but they aren't so sure so of to preg assesment unit at the hospital for me tomorrow!! My understanding school still expect me in for S2 parents' evening tonight though - bound to help my blood pressure that .
Otherwise all good - although feeling huge and getting beaten up by sproglet. have started the NATAL hypnobirthing CD - don't know what good it will do but it is very relaxing so I figure its worth a shot!

Lineky Don't go to the parents' evening. People call in sick for them all the time and you're going into hospital tomorrow FGS. I started my mat leave to avoid my S2 one as they are sooo exhausting. Hope all goes well tomorrow.

My tip would be to remember that everything is a phase and will pass so enjoy the good stuff while it lasts and don't alllow the hard things to get to you.
I'd also say your mothering instinct is often quite strong. For the first few months at least you'll know your baby better than anyone so don't be bullied by anyone (including HVs) into trying routines etc that you're not comfortable with. You'll find your own path in time.

Hi ladies

Dwayne I was referring to flybynight's situation when I said about having a second DC once others are at school - my DS1 is 2.6 so at nursery 2 days a week and hopefully going up to pre-school a couple of mornings in September but even so I've already got to a point where I have a bit of a life on the days when he's at nursery and am at the prospect of giving those up for a while!

And yes, I'm also huge, knackered and seriously fed up with it all!

sprouts when bump drops it usually means baby's head is engaged and it could be that it's ready to go (albeit a bit early) but equally they can drop and come back up again a few times before labour starts, over a period of weeks so probably nothing to worry about.

First timers, I just want to second a lot of tips already given - definitely make the most of your maternity leave, slob around and treat yourself a LOT because you'll never have time / freedom quite like that again. Make the most of it.

And definitely fill the freezer with dinners that you can just shove in the oven, it will make life so much easier after baby arrives.

Dwayne I meant to say I'm so glad to hear someone else made the finger-sucking mistake!! DH and I spent HOURS sat on the side of the bed in the middle of the night with a little finger in DS1's mouth tryign to get him off to sleep.

I know we're not supposed to mention Gina Ford but personally my top tip would be to take strict routines such as hers with a BIG old pinch of salt and do whatever you need to do to survive. You can nearly kill yourself trying to get your baby into a routine only for it to be out of the window as soon as they are ill / start teething etc. so I really wouldn't worry about it too much or make 'sleeping through' your holy grail. It'll all come, in time.

With DS2 my plan is to be more chilled about it all, feed him when he's hungry rather than when GF says he should be, and let him sleep after a feed if he wants to!

Dollshouse I don't want to alarm you but has any other part of you swollen? I was just reading one of my many baby books and apparently a swollen face can be a sign of Pre-Eclampsia. Really don't want to scare you but thought I should share it!

Thanks Neeko I read your msg when I got back survived though but think I will be stopping work on Friday instead of 12th of March - I'm sure they will survive and I'll have folios in - Hooray. Decided sproglet and I come first.

im also worried about giving up my freedom. ds starts school in september but even until then he's been a breeze to look after for a while now so its going to be weird having to do everything again. on the other hand having left it until now means he's old enough to help out a bit and understand more, he's been great through the pregnancy when iv told him mummy's tired and going to bed for a bit (just to rest not sleep) he's been quite happy to just play by himself and even asks me if he can help me bless him. hope i get another one like him.

i cant really think of any specific tips. i think like others have mentioned dont stress yourself out about routines and what not. i let ds settle into his own routine which i plan to do again as it worked out fine and it didnt stress me out like trying to force him into one would have. just try to keep calm and remember its not the end of the world if things go wrong.
i was quite upset for a few days about not being able to breastfeed last time as my midwife was quite adamant that i should carry on trying even though ds only latched on properly twice in the first 3 days, but i gave up and expressed some then went on to bottles. my health visitor was the one that cheered me up telling me id done the right thing as i was getting stressed trying to feed him which would then get him stressed etc and making things easier for yourself is the best thing to do for your baby as well. happy mummy = happy baby.

still im going to try breast feeding again this time and i probably wont give up as easily but if i do then i do im not putting to much pressure on myself. (i hope)

what sort of meals did you make that you can freeze all of it?? i have a veg pasta dish where i can freeze it and thats just a meal in itself. but the rest i was thinking of doing like chicken casserole means ill still have to make some mash or boiled pots and veg to go along with it iykwim.

Nicnac I find breastfeeding incredibly hard and painful. I have very flat, slightly inverted nipples and it is very difficult to get a decent latch. My eldest never really thrived on the breast - didn't gain weight as he should have, I was constantly ill - so i gave up at 4 months. There is a 14 month gap between my two boys, so I was expecting to struggle the second time too, especially with a toddler around, but in fact it came much easier to me the second time. Still sore for the first couple of weeks, but I breastfed DS2 until he was about 10 months old. So you might find things actually run smoother this time. I hope so anyway .

Pilla - I did think about pre-eclampsia as my hands and feet are also swollen which can be a sign of pre-eclampsia.

I saw my midwife today and she said that the swelling is due to water retention. I did have a trace of protein in my urine which they are sending off to the lab. However my blood pressure is completely normal 110/65 and you need to have high blood pressure for it to be pre-eclampsia. I'm also very low risk for pre-eclampsia because I didn't have it in my first pregnancy.

I'm a bit nervous about the protein in my urine but the midwife said that it could be due to an infection or it might not mean anything. Has anyone else had this?

I'm still presenting breech. Midwife said there is still plenty of time to move but I have a feeling that he doesn't want to budge. He is in exactly the same position as ds1 and ds1 didn't move an inch. I'm not sure if I mind anyway, I'm torn between thinking that an elective c-section is better because I had one before and on other days I worry because it is a major operation. Oh well what will be will be...

Nicnac re freezable meals, I must confess I'm cheating this time by buying a load of M&S ready meals and have just got the Ocado app onto my iPhone so I can order what I want whenever I want to!!

However when I was pregnant with DS1 and had more time on my hands I made:

• lasagnes
• shepherds pie
• cauliflower & broccoli cheese
• chicken casserole
• curries (spinach & chickpea is an easy one)
• moussaka type things

and with the cauli cheese & chicken casserole I just put potatoes in with it (baby new pots are good as they are waxy and don't break down too much) so that they were a complete meal and just needed getting out of the freezer in the morning to defrost and bunging in the oven half an hour before we wanted to eat.

Just need to have a moan now - DS1 (aged 2.6) had me up for 6 (count 'em) hours in the night and I am KNACKERED!! He had a bit of a temperature but didn't seem very ill, in fact was wide awake playing pat-a-cake with me at one stage. My mum thinks it's all symptomatic of him no longer needing his lunchtime nap but if he doesn't have his lunchtime nap, I don't get a break at all during the day (which I sorely need at the moment) and he is a horrible, grumpy, cranky little bundle of tantrums and tears from 3:30pm til bedtime.

Any advice? Should I bite the bullet and drop his nap in the hope of a better evening / night's sleep or carry on with it, savour my lunchtime rest and deal with the wakings?

DS is now at nursery (temperature's gone, they were happy to have him there, I was so grateful I almost wept) and I'm off to bed for a bit. Hope you're all feeling better than me, ladies!

wsnowtiger icould have written your post!! My DS is exhausting and today he has temperature and he is at home... im EXHAUSTED already but tanksfully he is napping now...
Got a babysitter tonight ... cant wait for our first evening alone in a long time!! (belated Valentine's dinner!)

Lineky are you an English teacher too? I got my folios, talk grades, Adv H prelims and dissertations and S1 and S2 national tests finished before I left. Looking back less than a week later I really wonder how. Have they arranged cover for you? My LA hasn't and I feel like I've abandoned a sinking ship.
Hope all went well for you today.

Snowtiger have you considered cutting the nap down to less than half and hour. IME kids hate being wakened from a nap but it could give you both a rest AND allow you more sleep at night.

Neeko that's a good idea, although you're right he hates being woken up - might give it a go though.

Have just had a call from nursery saying he's got a temperature again but is 'fine in himself'. Apparently a few of the children have had the same sort of thing so it's obviously a virus or something. Hopefully once he's better his sleep will improve.

thanks flybynight i hope so too.

funny you should say that snowtiger as i have just been to m & s today and bought a load of meals. cant promise they will last until after the baby is born though. i've gone right off cooking tea again at the mo like i did in the first 3 months, it just gets to that time in the day and im too exhausted to do anything and just want some cereal and my bed. last time i had my bloods done they said i could run a marathon with my iron levels so cant even blame that ha

Hello ladies,
Having manic day at work doing lots of Hard Sums so nipping on here for a break .
Finally met our new community midwife yesterday, she seems lovely, she is coming round to the house next week to do the homebirth visit so that's exciting.
Have just been in Primark buying cheap nighties and some sleepsuits, I didn't pack a hospital bag with DD as she was a planned homebirth, but of course it didn't go to plan and I ended up in hospital. Trying to pack a bag in the middle of labour at 2.30 in the morning is not ideal. So I'm packing it six weeks in advance this time just in case .
Very pleased as I managed to get a lovely pine chest of drawers on Ebay for 50 quid for the baby's room, so I can put all his clothes away tonight.
I'm planning to cook some meals when I'm on mat leave (only three more weeks of work to go!!). I also found it good to have a supply of homemade fruitcake and stuff like that, to keep energy levels up.
Re top tips for first timers, I would echo everyone else! Sit on the sofa and watch lots of old films while you still can. Also I think you will soon discover if you and your baby are routine people or not, I never was and was sometimes almost jealous of friends who were because they'd say, right it's 11 o'clock, time for a feed, whereas I'd just kind of bimble along till it seemed like time for a feed or whatever. The first week or two DD was so sleepy I was having to wake her every four hours, feed and change her, and put her back down to sleep again. Once she woke up a bit she was quite flexible regarding routine and still is, it's just her nature I think.
Also try and make sure you do get out, whether to mums and babies type things or just to the shops or the park, people love little babies and they're a great conversation starter. I'm not good at striking up conversations with people but when DD was little I'd chatter aimlessly away to anyone . It really does you and the baby good to get some fresh air.
Also I really recommend a sling, you can walk hands free and baby is all snuggled up against you.
Right, enough waffling, back to Hard Sums.

Neeko I am an english teacher too I am nearly as organised as you but my S4 need to do another talk which I had planned to do next week - ah well my PT will just have to deal with it. They told me today I have to stop work. I will be going in to hospital every 3 days for monitoring from now on - Joy. Going into school tomorrow to break the news and try and get some sort of order in my room for my cover. They have got someone for my maternity but I don't know if he'll be able to start next week. My DH keeps telling me not to stress about it as I have to put myself and sproglet 1st!
It is difficult though - I do feel I am abandoning them a bit.

Dollshouse phew, sounds like nothing major then. I have had traces of protein and apparently it can be down to loads of different things, good that they are being thorough though.
Bad luck Snowtiger my DS2 didn't sleep this afternoon and it totally threw me and since about 4pm he has just been a monster, hitting DS1 and he even kicked him in the head at one point which is very out of character!! He was awake at 5am too!

thedolshouse..I had my wee sample sent off to the lab last week aswell, for the same reaqson as protein in my wee. I was told the same thing, could be nothing, or could be an infection..I have midwife on Wednesday so should find out then if everythings ok or not. Only thing forme is cuz I'm planning a homebirth, I'm just worried this might affect that, although midwife didn't seem too concerned
Snowtiger I have a 2.6 dd as well, and I have stopped her daytime naps for a good while now, and for the same reason...at first I only let her sleep before 1pm, but then it was starting to get harder for her to settle at that time, even though she's been in a routine for daytime naps since about a year old.She did struggle some days, so every few days I let her sleep, then she would be ok for a couple of days, and then again on the 3rd or 4th she would need a catch up if that makes sense. She hasn't been sleeping in the day since before christmas, but recently has started finding it REALLY hard to cope with a full day..making it REALLY hard for me as well!!
She tends to have about an hour to an hour and half of stroppiness and extreme tantrums , leaving me feeling awful for not putting her to bed, but yet knowing she wouldn't sleep properly, and that would keep her awake til about 8-9ish at night, and still waking at between 6 and 7am.
aia've always had a good bed and nap routine for her, allowing her between 13 and 14 hours sleep per day/night, and I think the the trouble at the moment is she's still waking a little early to last easily....but for me it's far better to have her in bed and settled without a fuss by 6.15pm every night, and awake about 12 hours later, then let her have 12 hours sleep spread out throughout both the day and night...I feel like I've rambled on and on...so I'm so sorry... None of that probably makes sense either....oops!! I'm tired lol xx

Lineky Being an English teacher automatically makes you a control freak IMO but you've put other people's children 1st for years, now it's your LO's turn. it's hard to believe but we're not indispensible and the kids muddle through without you. (Won't go into the state of your room when you return though!)
Do what you can tomorrow and then walk awy. I give you a week and you'll stop listening for bells and worrying about them. Promise.

Snowtiger I'd forgotten about the napping every other day thing. That worked for my DD for a while too.

I've been having loads of slightly painful braxton hicks today so now DD is asleep I'm off for a bath with my natal hypnotherapy cd. Night all.

Hi everyone, I just been reading what everyone's up to. I've not been online for a while as we've been moving to Wales from Bulgaria for the birth!
Finally getting settled here, I think. Spent the last week visiting people, shopping and eating things I can't have in BG (CHINESE TAKEAWAY!!!). Overdid it lots I think, travelling is uncomfortable and hands and feet swollen and back/bum/hips/pelvis all painful. Gonnna be a slob from now on!
It was all worth it to finally see a doctor and midwife who speak english!! BP, wee, baby heartbeat etc all healthy. Have to wait another couple of weeks for scan and blood. Can't wait for that as will maybe find out baby's sex and have better idea of my due date - see if they coincide with any of the 3 dates I was given in Bulgaria!
It still doesn't seem 'real' that this baby is gonna come out, I'm so used to the bump.. still can't grasp the whole birth idea.. I'm not nervous or anything yet. It'll hit me all at once... eeek.
I am ENORMOUS and get a shock everytime I look in the mirror. I really don't know how all you mums manage other kids and working, I struggle to turn over in bed, I feel like such a wimp and I think you're all superwomen.
Hope you're all ok, have a good day full of crumpets and british daytime trash telly!!

mmm crumpets...working from home today so DH (who works from home FT) has gone off to get Friday fish'n'chips .
Is anyone else constantly dreaming about the birth? I seem to dream about it every night, then every morning I wake up convinced the baby's going to come that day. I have to keep patting my tummy to make sure he's still in there!

Yippee I have now finished work
looking forward to a few weeks of total slobbish relaxation.
Neeko I found it quite easy to leave in the end - my room was already a bloody coup but they have my replacement starting on Monday so that's a bonus. I never forget the bells though - the schools only a few hundred meters away!!!
My big problem at the mo is that my bump is making Guitar Hero very difficult - I need a pregnancy shaped axe!

Neeko, Pillia and Tweetz thanks for the nap advice - DS1 only had an hour's nap today as I woke him up a bit early so hopefully he'll sleep better tonight. The napping every other day thing might be a good idea too, I'll give that a try if this doesn't work.

The thing that really bothers me about dropping the nap is that it makes the afternoon so miserable for both of us. If it was just me suffering from 4pm onwards I wouldn't mind so much but yesterday when he was really tired, having had little to no nap, he was an absolute mess by 5pm. Bathtime was horrendous (despite being brought forwards by 45 mins) and he was so tired / fed up he was literally distraught. It took me more than 30 mins to get him from the landing into the bathroom, thanks to all the tantrums!

It's no fun is it, the transition times when they drop a nap? I do look forward to the time when he can manage without his nap but is tired enough to conk out at 7pm!

Anyway enough of my moaning. Welcome back to Blighty, rumpleteaser it's great to hear you're enjoying your Chinese takeaways and rubbish telly!

I'm also very impressed with you ladies juggling pregnancy, children and 'proper' jobs - I'm a freelance writer so work from home pretty much at my own convenience. Some days the thought of having to go into a proper job where you have to dress nicely and talk in sentences, let alone providing people's education, would make me want to weep!

Right, thanks to rumpleteaser's inspiration I'm now going to persuade DH that he wants to go and get us a Chinese takeaway for dinner. Mmm spare ribs!!

Lineky Happy maternity leave! I had a visit from two members of my dept today. The cover is a nightmare and someone else is on long term sick leave. Seems I'm missed but have completely zoned out!

Snowtiger Hope your DS sleeps better tonight. Can you convince him to have some cuddle time with you watching a DVD or reading a story in the afternoon so that he's resting but not sleeping? It is a difficult stage but they tend to adapt in a couple of weeks.

Rumpleteaser Welcome back to Blightey!

Bettymum Hope the fish n chips were yummy.

Had a MW appointment today. All well and baby heading in the right direction - yay!