Due Sept 05 - Thread 8

[franch]

Here it is.

Some relatives can be so insensitive can't they? I was at a family funeral a couple of weeks ago and as I walked into the chapel of rest, I heard my Gran ( old but certainly not losing it!!) say really loudly to another old dear " She lost a lot of weight for her wedding but as you can see has put it all back on now" AAhh!! I'm on my second pregnancy and got married four years ago! I know that I'm really lucky as being an ample size 16 before pregnancy, my baby bump just mingles in with the rest of my tummy until about 6 months and I've only put on about half a stone so far. I'm cetain it's cutting out the booze that stops me putting on lots and know that once the baby is born I should learn my lesson and avoid so much red wine!!

Boompi - you're a lightweight compared to me!! I've gained nearly 20 kilos (I don't know how much that is in pounds) & I'm 23 weeks. Tell your mum that. I was slender to begin - Don't know how I've got so big - but I feel that it must be what I need to be. My doc said she was surprised but as my bp was fine it was ok. Have never dieted and have always lost it afterwards by breastfeeding & just looking after little ones. I have other mums at school asking how many weeks I've got left & when I say 16 they look really shocked as I look so big. But I really don't care what everyone thinks. I actually feel much better for being bigger all over. lots of best wishes xxx

Thanks for all lovely comments. Feel much better. Just not sure if I should mention my dh speaking to MIL to my mum.Or if it will just cause unnecessary stress. Dont know if she imagined MIL's critisism as SHE is worried re weight or if it was a deliberate way to reemphasise her already expressed feelings on having a 'large daughter' (Mum was a model when younger so its an issue for her) TBH - I have felt quite comfy with my body for some years now and rather like my ever increasing baby curves! I guess we are never impervious to our mother's critical remarks though. I hope I remember all this when my little one is growing up!

Have my first ante-natal/Parenting class at GP practice this afteroon - not sure what to expect but will let you know.

Shudder to think how much I've put on! Gained 4 and a half stone ish last time, and don't expect not to this time as well. PLEASE DON'T GET UPSET!!!! Midwives here don't weigh unless they consider weight may be a problem.

Boompi - have to say that sometimes I'm pleased my mother is on the other side of the world, as I'm sure I would get a similar comment from her! Don't take it to heart - I agree with Andif, thought you looked very 'normal' (whatever that is!) at the meet up - certainly smaller than me! As long as you feel healthy, and the doctor is happy, don't let it stress you out!!

I haven't been on the scales since my first midwife appointment, so have no idea how much I've gained (can be 110% certain I haven't lost though!). Wasn't exactly sylph like before I got pregnant though - am hoping that breast feeding will work wonders once I've had the baby!

Had another scan this morning as they couldn't get all the measurements at the 20 weeks scan. Baby was much more co-operative this time though, and all measurements are fine, except the legs, which are longer than average (DH is 6'5'' though, so not really a surprise!) - thankful it's not the head that's bigger than average !!

Hello.

I've been perusing this site for a while, but thought I would de-lurk to ask a question. Possibly tmi coming up - so if you're eating your lunch, you might want to come back later...

I'm 24 weeks pregnant (due 22nd September-ish) and for the last fortnight or so have noticed that the amount of fluid I'm producing downstairs has increased greatly. Every now and again (not every day) there's a definite dribble and I find myself quite moist. Anyone else getting this?? I think I'm in panty-liner territory now (either that or incontinence pads... )

On the subject of weight gain: I don't understand where relatives think they get off commenting on one's size, pregnant or not. My husband's cousin and his wife have just had a baby and his mother was telling the rest of the family how big she was. She wasn't really. She has a rather 'Junoesque' build - and her bump was all out front. Besides - does the woman want to be a grandmother to a healthy child or not??

Boompi, I have put on about 2 stone so far. And I'm 24 weeks. I put on 4.5 stone last time. And within about 7 months had lost it all and more.

Weight gain isn't something that anyone has seemed too interested in with me - I got weighed at the first midwife appointment and don't expect to get weighed again.

Hello RedZuleika .

Welcome to the September thread. I am 24 and a bit weeks pregnant (due on 16th September) and also have a DS called Benjamin who is 18 months.

I go through phases of more or less coming out of my nether regions. I did have thrush recently (which was nicely cured with a pessary), but at the moment it's OK. Still have gushes of stuff sometimes though.

There's never TMI here .

Hi RedZuleika and welcome! I'm nearly 24 weeks too (EDD 24th Sept) and have been having a small amount of "discharge" all the way through this pg. Amount varies from day to day but haven't had to resort to pads yet. Was quite worried at first as I had absolutely nothing during my first pg 18 months ago. Suppose each pg is different, even for the same person! Have you added yourself to our stats thread? Sorry I can't do a link but franch did one on here yesterday (a little further down this page).

Hi RedZuleika - welcome to the September thread! I'm nearly 24 weeks (EDD 26th Sept) - resorted to panty sheilds a few months back. Lovely . Where are you located? If you're in London, we're planning a meetup on the 11th June (see thread further down re Due in Sept meetup)...

Boompi - Please don't let other people upset you over your weight I have battled with mine since i was 16 and heard all kinds of well meant but hurtfull comments from relatives and friends who were perfectly aware that I have an underactive thyroid and therefore struggle to control my weight. As long as your midwife and gp are not undully concerened try not to worry about it as everyone else has said you will soon loose it with breast feeding and the added exercise of running round after jnr. On a lighter note I have been asked recently by someone at work if i was expecting an elephant!!!!!!!!!!! So although they have eventually got my thyroid levels right and i have lost some weight i must still look quite big. There is a girl at toddler group who is due 3 weeks before me and her bump is non existant most of the others did not even realise she was pregnant till this week, we all carry differently and lets face it life would be pretty borring if we were all the same wouldn't it.

Just a quickie to welcome RedZuleika The stats thread is here , RZ - please do add your details.

I see you're planning a homebirth RedZuleika - snap - are you doing it on the NHS? Which hosp midwives are you using?

Hello. Thanks for responses. Have added myself to the stats (after brief pause to find fresh undergarments...).

I've had a fair amount of discharge since the beginning, but recently it's become less viscous, more watery. The first day it happened I had a wee bit of a crisis about whether it could be something more serious. I wonder if it's related to the peanut being quite active and kicking / punching downwards on my cervix (which is a sensation I could do without...). Am seeing the midwife tomorrow, so will have a word.

Re: the weight thing. I've only put on half a stone since the beginning, but have been in maternity clothes for quite some time (and don't get me started on the expansion of my already quite large bust). I was a bit over my optimal BMI to start with and I've been eating very well, so I'm assuming the peanut knows what it's doing. My husband has lost weight since January too - as there's hardly been any alcohol, I don't do sweet products and I've had an aversion to meat and fish, cooking and eating thereof. (Yum! Lentils again...)

Franch: Ah, yes - the homebirth. All sorted now, but a matter of some angst earlier on. The NHS midwives did not inspire me with confidence - and in fact, as I am allegedly 'high risk', the community midwife wanted me to see the consultant again at week 37 - presumably so I could have the error of my ways pointed out to me.

I have antiphospholipid antibody syndrome and am on aspirin and heparin until week 36. However, I'm not having regular monitoring (after 3 scans in the first trimester), I'm not having my platelets tested fortnightly - and the consultant demonstrated no interest in seeing me again (which is fine by me!). I appreciate that there may be issues to do with the third stage of labour - or what I do if I go past my edd - but I have yet to find any research which convinces me that I would be better in hospital.

I don't like the statistics for Watford General, they only have one birthing pool - and because I am allegedly high risk, they can cheerfully deny me the birthing centres. Also, I've had two of three early miscarriages there - which leaves me with much the same feeling as Louise ('Thelma & Louise') not wanting to drive through Texas.

So. The upshot of this is that we have employed an independent midwife. Not cheap - and decorating the kitchen will have to wait until next year. She has dealt with women with my condition before - and at least this way I know that if I end up having a Caesarean, it will be unavoidable - and not precipitated by hospital interventions or policies (because who would like to have major abdominal surgery when they have a clotting disorder...??).

Rather more of an answer than you were anticipating, I imagine...

Btw - when I said that the NHS midwives didn't inspire me with confidence, I meant from the point of view of supporting me in my choices. I wasn't impugning their professional qualifications.

RedZuleika - I have a friend chose a home birth with independent midwife for a variety of reasons, and even when she did eventually end up in hospital (back to back labour and things not progressing) she was still pleased that she had made that decision as she had tried her best to have the home birth she wanted. I'm also hoping to have a home birth, but am trying to be realistic about possible outcomes - who knows what could happen. My fear is that I'll tear again badly, necessitating a trip to hospital for stitching, but in acknowledging that that is a possibility I suppose I'm at least forwarned and forearmed. I'm confident in my community NHS midwives; otherwise I think I'd have had the kitchen done next year instead too! Have you seen Home Birth Diaries on Discovery? There was one episode with a woman who had 2 prior c-sections but was adamant that she wanted to at least try a home water birth despite recommendations from consultants that she have a hospital birth. In the end, she had a lovely home birth, exactly as she wanted, which I think is pretty inspiring. Fingers crossed for all of us!
About the discharge - I think that if your waters were breaking or leaking, the discharge smells sweet (image of knicker sniffing ). But I had exactly the same concerns first time round as lots of discharge, kind of like when I was TTC and paying particular attention to the discharge when ovulating. Thistime, exactly the same. But do mention it to your midwife if you're concerned.
Good luck

sorry, i'm due on the 3rd

Me too Bubbles Was your dd on time? My dd was born on her due date, but would settle for a few days late or early this time as dh is supposed to be best man at a friend's wedding in Loughborough (about 3 -4 hours away) on the 3rd. So if no arrival by then, will be keeping my fingers and legs well and truly crossed!

lol pooka, my dd was 4 rays late. i can handle that as long as i don't go 2 weeks over. my mil is being my birthing partner as well as my dp, but she goes on holiday on the 1st so she's hoping i go in a few days early, lol.

My DD was 13 days late!!! Can't really blame her actually as I'm late for everything . So my fingers (and everything else) were well and truly twiddled! Hoping this one will be a bit more punctual. My mum & dad are going to Italy 10 days after EDD. I know my mum will refuse to go if I haven't produced by then so the pressure is on because I don't want to ruin their hol.

My dd was 7 days late am kind of hoping this one is early as i would like to be able to pop out for an hour or two with my friends on my birthday rather than in hospital as this bundle of joy is due round about my 30th!!!!

guess what? my dp has spoken to our friends this am and they have booked their wedding...........................for the b**y 3rd of Sept........

they thought i was due between my birthday and dp's (23rd and 30th august)

so likely scenarios are

a) baby is born last week of August........some how don't think i'll be up for going to a wedding a week later (esp if i end up with a section or stitches and the like)

b) i could be in labour on the day of the wedding in which case we miss one of the most important days of two of our best friends lives

c) i'm still waiting for baby in which case i will have to buy an outfit to wear which i will never use again, and i'll be so uncomfortable i won't enjoy the day anyway.

i'm also slighty annoyed that by getting married so close to my due date they are stealing my thunder a bit (this makes me feel very shallow)

this friendship has changed dynamics over the last few months anyway and this has stirred up all sorts of emotions feel like this is one friendship i'm waving goodbye to at the moment.

sorry just had to rant and get that off my chest.......

Oh dear! I'm really gutted also at missing my friend's wedding, but equally there is no way I'll be going as wouldn't trust being able to make it home in time.
I'm MORE annoyed about other really good friend's wedding which is 3 weeks after due date where no children are allowed. Fair enough, my toddler dd can be looked after by my mother. Bt the new babe? It's not as if it'd be eating anything costly () and will hardly be toddling around unless amazingly precosious. And of course I wouldn't expect to be at the actual ceremony if it was crying. Feel really left out

I really don't understand why people have weddings without children. Weddings are about starting a new life together and are all about family and lets face it what is a family without children. I can understand the frustration with regard to dates but on saying that my best friend and his wife live in Bristol and they made the journey to our special day when she was 38 weeks I was so happy to see them. Could have had something to do with the fact that he would of liked his son to be born in Birmingham like himself i suppose but the dear little lad was born nearly two weeks after his due date in the end. We shall be travelling down to Bristol for his 4th birthday about three weeks before i am due to drop, will keep our fingers crossed that this one does not decide to arrive early but i know the hospital down there is excellent if we do have any problems.