Due May 09 - May Day! May Day!! Read All About It - Babies Dropping Everywhere!!!

[divedaisy]

Here we go ladies... over to you all!

hi all

eventually remembered to get the orange mobile surfing safe guard lifted off my phone so I can now MN from my phone out of the house as i now don't need our wireless broadband signal.. ready for going into hospital to make all important announcements!

in ikea car park at mo while ds sleeps and dh exchanges a cracked bit of ds's new chest of drawers.

ds was up at 5am this morning but dh let me sleep and I got up at 8am. dh not feeling V well.. bad cold brewing so hoping to avoid it ..

There must be something in the water re MILs this weekend. Mine had me in tears last night - basically told me that its rubbish having a newborn and you can't go anywhere or do anything and all you want to do is cry all the time because its so hard! The last straw was when I told her I was planning to fill the freezer with portions of chilli etc so we don't have to cook when we get home from hospital and she said 'oooh be careful, the baby will have an upset tummy if you eat chilli' fgs! what did she think I was going to make f*cking vindaloo??!! This was also after she told me I should probably resign myself to not being able to breastfeed because she couldn't for my DH which meant he cried all the time.

aaargh!

Sorry, off to catch up on posts now see if there are any new babies!

frazz sorry to hear you had such a pants day yesterday, hope you are feeling a bit better today.

gert Edith is soooo cute, am loving the strawberry sleepsuit, very chic.

blotted happy birthday to your dd, hope you have a lovely day.

belgian sending labour vibes your way, maybe some of my hot chilli would help ;)

ladyh think I missed your announcement. Congrats. Rufus is a lovely name.

Momi Harper Grace is a good name, goes well with your other two I think as well.

Hope I haven't missed anyone, off to look at pics of gethin now, although will prob set me off blubbing again, its all I seem to do atm

Runningmonkey Very helpful advice from MIL .

I just remembered that we were meant to go on a hospital tour yesterday. I completely forgot and now its probably too late as I'm due on Fri and I think they only do it on the weekend and there is a long waiting list. Oh well I'm sure someone will point us the way at the the time and I won't really care what it looks like as long as there is Gas and air. .

Need to do online shop.

runningmonkey - Please don't hate me for saying this but your MIL doesn't sound that horrible to me. Realistic and a bit harsh, and perhaps sounded nasty to you as a first time mum, but it is rather true that the first months of a baby's life are very hard indeed. And changing hormones mean that you do cry a fair bit during that period (I certainly did and so did many friends), so she was possibly only trying to mentally prepare you for this possibility.

I'm not sure exactly what "chili" is in the UK, but she is right that you probably shouldn't be eating much of strong spices while breastfeeding. And "you might not be able to breastfeed, if so, don't beat yourself up about it" might also be good advice but of course a lot of this depends on how things are said and the history of your relationship with her.

I honestly can't get over how "helpful" some of our MILs are. Don't take any notice running - bear in mind there's a lot more understanding and support for breastfeeding these days, you'll be fine! Plus, if you eat chilli and that kind of thing just now, your baby is already used to it.

I feel a bit guilty because I put DS2 and DD into nursery today so DH and I could get our bedroom pulled apart and organised but all I've achieved so far is emptying all my shelves and units onto my bed. I'm so cumbersome

Congratulations to new babies!

runningmonkey- there's no logic that if your MIL had difficulty BF then you should expect the same. Just ignore her silly comments- yes, you may have difficult days, and you need to make the most of any help that is offered and make sure you go out and meet other news mums (or have a chat on here) as that will help you share any problems and probably help you realise you are actually coping really well!

Thanks Cote don't hate you at all

I know motherhood going to be hard, and I'm not unrealistic - in fact given how emotional I have been during pg, I am fully expecting to be tearful! In fact, I'm not expecting to be able to do anything, I have no firm plans other than 'what I would like to do's...' with regard to the birth/bf'ing/nappies/etc as I don't want to set myself up to feel like a failure at the start of motherhood. I've made sure I've read a range of views talked to loads of people and have taken on board lots of differing advice.

I do appreciate that she was trying to be helpful but it is the way it was said that p'ed me off tbh. Especially as she knows I'm also dealing with my own Mum who is suffering from depression which is making her v negative in her interactions with everyone atm.

I also know that MIL is from a v different generation to me or my own parents - eg. when she had my DH, my FIL didn't get any pat leave and does nothing around the house and so when she got home after a week in hospital there was a week's worth of washing up/cleaning/etc for her to do while she waited on visitors... enough to tip anyone over the edge in my estimation so I can see that she must have had a particularly tough time and I respect her for going on to have 3 more kids after the initial experience. However, her comments about this also made me annoyed on behalf of my DH - the fact that she expects her own son to be just like his dad when actually he is brilliant around the house and so excited about the joint responsibility of parenting made me really . Just as an example, he has already said he would like to set ground rules and screen the number and frequency of visitors, has asked for a list of things to make sure are ready at home for me (including what I'd like for my first dinner). This is just amongst many other things he does as well - he is fab!

As for her comment about chilli, given most of our diet consists of curries, mexican and asian style food, I'd be v surprised if the lo wasn't already used to a chilli or two! Also it was the first food item that popped into my head, I think she thinks I'm going to make a freezer full of the blimmin stuff

Ooh have been meaning to ask you about those carpal tunnel exercises - did they help at all?

thanks pula - I've already have picked up a list of our local mum and baby activities for when I'm feeling up to it and have scoped out a short pushchair friendly walk around the block to make sure I get out of the house at least once a day!

Not being able to eat spicey food and breastfeeding is a MYTH. Complete and utter bollocks.

Well, myth or not, the few times I ate spicy stuff while breastfeeding, DD wasn't a happy camper at all.

runningmonkey - It's a good thing that you are keeping an open mind. I didn't know how hard it could be and that with constant help from my mum who moved in with us for two months after the birth. I don't know what we would have done without her.

Oh and don't get me started about men DH vacated his office and moved his work stuff into the house so he could be there and help me out in the first months of DD's life.

What happened was, after about 10 days of DD crying constantly day and night, he just HAD TO go to the office for some important meeting or other & finally gave up the pretense of working from home and just got up and left every day. I don't blame him. I would have run away as well, if I could walk

Afternoon all.

Have just managed a skim read of the last few hundred posts and managed to see there have been loads of babies arriving! Congratulations momimo tummum jael gert. Good work ladies and what good taste we all have in our new ones' names!!

So while I have 5 mins, here's the story of Friday night:

As you know, waters broke about 4.30 and had to call DH and DS out of DS's swimming lesson to get him homw. Nipped to hospital to confirm it was waters and came home again. Cntrx started about an hour later and stepped up a gear about 9pm so decided to in to the hospital. At 11pm despite ctrx being quite painful and not far apart, I was only 1 -2 cm dilated. So assumed in for a loooooong night....

An hour later they were worse and asked for an epidural but I there wasn't a room available for me to move to as I needed to be nearer the " main control" to have the epidural, so kept to the gas and air. Within minutes, felt the pressure building and MW was confident things were progressing. Then began to feel need to push. I have NEVER felt pain like it through the next hour and pushed and grunted and screamed until at 2.15 out came our gorgeous new little boy.

As it all happened quite quickly, I had a third degree tear as had to go to theatre after than.Thank the Lord I had a spinal block for what ever they did down there!

Anyhooooo, back home last night. Hardly any sleep over past three nights but happy as anything to have Rufus here. DS is being great with him. Think am needed for some boob action so hope can do a proper catch up with all the latest later on.

Anyone else pending????

Congratulations ladyhelen

I hope you heal soon. Take it easy & enjoy your baby boy.

Congratulations ladyhelen - well done you and I love the name Rufus. Thanks for sharing your birth story - sounds quite intense but very quick - time for recovery now I think!.

Running monkey I would agree with some - try not to take it to heart too much - a lot of it is what you make it and - it sounds like you have good perspective on the situation anyway.
And sounds as though your MIL is projecting her pretty tough experience onto you as though it must be like that for everyone, when it clearly isn't. Your DH sounds fab though so she has made a good job of bringing him up!
First day of ML and DH is off as its the bank holiday, so today and yesterday has been a lot of cleaning, painting, moving stuff around and playing with DS. I do feel a little freaked out - as in - why am I off work? Even though I don't work on a Monday anyway - part of me is in denial that I am off because of impending new born baby arriving - is that crazy?

ladyhelen - lovely to hear from you and thank you for sharing your story. Another fast one, wow!

runningmonkey - you'll get loads of advice off loads of people. Feel free to ignore anything you don't agree with and/or didn't ask for!

rosielady - you've been really busy already! Very impressive. It's odd starting maternity leave, isn't it? I felt almost like I was skiving off work!

Very quiet day here today, DH out cycling all day, DD is asleep, was going to make cake this afternoon but can't be bothered so it'll just be rhubarb crumble (yum, for tea tonight with custard) and I'll make some curry too I think - also for tea as I suppose I ought to give them some proper food, I could happily just eat crumble. With a gaviscon chaser of course...although my heartburn seems to have eased off a bit, maybe a sign that LO is heading slightly southwards?!

Ladyhelen great to hear from you & thanks for sharing your story - wow, what a quick labour!

runningmonkey I think it was very unfair of your MIL to make comments like that - even if that was her experience, what's the point in worrying you at this late stage? TBH it is tough at times parenting a newborn (mostly the fact that it's 24h with no time off), but IME it's a hell of a lot better than I thought it would be - I was actually dreading it beforehand. Every time I groan about getting out of bed in the night, as soon as I pick H up it's all worth it. I probably shouldn't offer advice, but for what it's worth, I'd just recommend keeping your expectations of what you can achieve in a day very low, then you'll be pleasantly surprised. Sounds like your DH has got the right idea. I'm sure you'll be absolutely fine.

Well at least someone in this house is getting labour vibes. My bloody cat is having kittens under the boys' bunk bed. I got to see the first one being born which was nice

Wish it was me

just got home and finished lunch.. having a cuppa before I tackle the kitchen and sort out a few loads of washing. weather is cold, windy and rainy. so much for the bank holiday.

runningm dealing with a new born is a steep learning curve but even with the sleep deprivation, hormonal tears, sore bits etc you'll still love it. everyone is different and i do think your mil is projecting her 1st experience onto you. but seeing as she then had more dc's even she must have thought it not too bad ;) so don't worry and your dh sounds fabby ready to pitch in.

ladyh great to hear you're home and hope your tear is not too uncomfortable & heals quick.

blotted :-) at your cat.. how many kittens did she have altogether?

I know this may sound a bit daft but even at this ginormous bump stage I still have moments I forget I'm pregnant! I was in the post office sat am and the lady asked me how long I had to go . she must have thought me a bit daft as she had to repeat the question before I twigged what she meant! my brain and a quick look down at my tummy then reminded me I was heavily pregnant and I was able to answer her.. lol

finished cuppa so off to tackle chores before I get too tired ..

Sorry folks. Didn't mean to post and run. Have an upset stomach. running monkey sounds like your dh is great, and has the right idea.

The insidious subliminal message that breastfeeding is likely to fail starts early. It really gets on my goat. It starts before you even get your first Bounty pack. Yes some foods may affect a baby, but is absolutely no reason for mum to give up eating them. Yes the early weeks are hard, and not just for mums who have never done it before believe me, but the pure ease of walking out of the door with a couple of nappies and wipes and muslins is liberating, not restricting. Rant over.