Anybody else due in NOVEMBER 2009 :-) PART 3

[ldeeanna]

Hopefully this has worked?

Good morning all!

turtle - yipiee for the scan. Had mine yesterday, too. Sprout seems to be OK, waving to us, picking its nose and flashing bum. Took quite a while to get the measurements for nuchal results. I need to wait for the bloods to come back in a week or so, they wouldn't just say without them. But it certainly brought things home a bit more... We're having a baby. Wow.....

Started to tell everyone, just won't shut up now. DH taking in things in a very sweet way, too. Seems to be more excited at times than me.

Welcome scratchet - I hope you feel better soon.

Have a nice day y'all.

Thanks pinkfizzle for the doc - just waiting for it to open.
ursigurke if you google Maternity Rights you will get loads of info - there is one called Maternity Action or something, ACAS, DWP. and there is also BERR which has a lot of info for your boss.

Gulp - I have my first consultation meeting today so very nervous and not looking forward to it. Feel v sick actually.

raggie I think the date from your scan is meant to be more accurate than your LMP, as LMP date does not consider the lenght of your cycle so could be a couple of weeks out in theory. I too have a backwards tilting uterus and it is nothing to worry about - you dont get a smaller bump - lol - and apparently it is fairly common, like being left handed or something so don't worry that you are not normal!

pedalmonster - hope the meeting goes well, keeping them crossed

Gosh, thanks everyone. Pinkfizzle this is brilliant in terms of whats what - but I also rang Acas and it seems that the laws have changed (the doc from PF is latest) and preg people are NOT protected from redundancy. But everyone I have spoken to said that it is too much political risk to make me redundant. ugg I don't know - honestly, if they do get rid of me, who will hire me when my bump is sticking out in front of me!! " yes, sure, we'd like to offer you a job -in 15 months time".

Welcome scratchet hope you feel better soon!

And great news on scans..and I have a reverse tilting uterus too..its quite common but makes scans harder..

thoughts to all los allergy suffering. It's a nightmare..seems to be a lot worse in England..here in Switzerland its far too clean to get anything!!! I'm sure pollution has a lot to do with it.

In my case the risk assessment was just one of those 'tick the box so you can't sue us' things (call me cynical)..utterly useless and even if you moan about something they do nothing about it! I moaned about my chair at work and they did nothing for months. I had to swap with a reluctant colleague myself. I suppose with a more manual job its more necessary, mine was sedentary with lots of talking on the phone which i loved.. i miss work .

Anyone read the article in the Times about what you would advise your DDs to become in life??? I thought it was very interesting. Marry rich was the advice! The working mothers debate is a tough one. I would love to go back to work but not 5 days a week as I'd miss out on the los but who can afford that or who allows that these days..??? when I eventually go back my pay scale will have collapsed...its just not fair. sorry for the moan

Did anyone see that documentary on bbc2 last night - the problem with working women (may be able to get a download from the bbc iplayer website? It was brilliant - it was all about where you are prepared to compromise, women who want equality to men, but on their own terms, sacrifices you make to go to work, sacrifices you make to stay at home. It made me really think about what I really want? (I dont know!) I dont want it all though - who has all that energy?!

Great news on scans!

I haven't been on for a few days and trying to catch up on the posts!

I joined NCT last week and attending a refresher antenatal course in the Autumn. I didn't join them the first time around when pg with DS. I did the NHS classes, and I was not impressed with the whole set up and there was no emphasis on networking with other mums to be. I'm hoping to get lots more out of the NCT course.

Hope everyone is feeling lots better with the MS

I saw it pedalmonster it was fascinating. It is so hard trying to 'have it all'. I went for the say goodbye to a career but work from home route and it works well for me but there's no such thing as promotion or appraisals or bonuses in this life. I do earn more money per hour than I did when I started and do more fulfilling work but might struggle getting back into it with three children in tow!

I think I'm just prepared (rather grumpily) to sacrifice some years of my career in order to make sure that my children do okay until they're in kindergarten, at least. If we could afford a fabulous nanny or if one of our mothers could take them, I'd probably go back to work earlier, but the crummy wage I could get (either in publishing or academia) wouldn't even cover childcare plus travel after taxes were taken out. It's so depressing - we'd wind up LOSING money. I should probably make more of an effort to get freelance work, but I gather from talking to my old editors that loads of people are scrambling for it in the current climate...

Great news on all the scans! Mine went well too except the poor thing was squashed into a tiny corner due to the size of my full bladder!! I didn't realise you didn't have to drink loads before it at 12 weeks!! Anyhoo he was obviously a bit miffed as he refused to give us any more than a bum shot and a few kicks. The sonographer was lovely and even had a quick look at the nuchal fold (which she's not meant to as they don't do this in Glasgow yet) and it looked fine.

So updated the list with my new due date although might change again with my booking scan. The hospital managed to lose my referral letter so still no appointment Luckily was still getting scans through EPAS so not a major issue.

Update:
Julietbat #2 EDD 28 Oct,
Pinkfizzle #1 EDD 28 Oct, SE London
Koumak #2 EDD 28 Oct (TBC), 12w scan 16 Apr, North London, UCHL
FattipuffsandThinnifers #2 EDD 31 Oct,
ursigurke #1 EDD 31 Oct, West London
Mrsladybug #? EDD 1 Nov,
Mangolassi #2 EDD 1 Nov,
Travelinglight #2 EDD 2 Nov, N London, UCLH
Lillee #? EDD 3 Nov,
Supercherry #2 EDD 4 Nov,
Chocotastic #2 EDD 4 Nov, SE London
Fruitpastels #2 EDD 4 Nov, SE London
Stokey #1 EDD 4 Nov, North London
Homeinthesun #2 EDD 4 Nov,
Gizboss #1 EDD 4 Nov
Lemontop #1 EDD 5 Nov,
Ronniemummy #2 EDD 5 Nov (to be confirmed!!)
Browntrout #2 EDD 6 Nov Manchester
tamlin #2 EDD 5 Nov,
Piper #1 EDD 6 Nov,
BonyM #? EDD 6Nov,
Leannabanana #3 EDD 6 Nov,
BlackLetterDay #3 EDD 6 Nov,
Tabbykat #2 EDD 7 Nov, Kent
Mrsdisorganised #5 EDD 7 Nov (to be confirmed!!)
Scarlotti #3 EDD 7 Nov,
WizzyWoo #2 EDD 7 Nov,
AileenF1 # EDD 8 Nov,
Barnowl #4 EDD 8 Nov,
Munchies37 #1 (Twins) EDD 8 Nov,
sleeplessinthecity #2 EDD 8 Nov, Switzerland
Buttercup EDD 9 Nov,
Catitainahatita #2 EDD 9 Nov,
Helips #2 EDD 9 Nov,
CakeForBreakfast #2 EDD 9 Nov,
Hobnob57 #2 EDD 9 Nov,
Tiddlypom #2 EDD 9 Nov
Cies #1 EDD 10 Nov, Vigo, NW Spain.
QueenNeurosis #? EDD 10 Nov,
PootleTheFlump #1 EDD 15 Nov,
eeyore2 #1 EDD11 Nov,
Grendle EDD 11 Nov,
lynniep #2 EDD 11 Nov, Cambridgeshire
CassORole #? EDD 11 Nov
Weston #2 EDD 12 Nov,
LadyGooGoo #3 EDD 13 Nov, North Wales
roomac #3 EDD 13 Nov, NW London
Tigger32 #3 EDD 14 Nov, East Midlands
Thandeka EDD 14 Nov,
MiniLlace #? 14 Nov,
Southernbelle77 #2 EDD 14 Nov, West Sussex
BeckyBendyLegs #3, EDD 14 Nov, Shorpshire
Barnowl #4 EDD 15 Nov, Hampshire
pinkmich1972 #3 EDD 15 Nov, kent
DeathbyDora #3 EDD 15 Nov, USA
alexdrake #2 EDD 15 Nov, Essex
Kyte #2 EDD 16 Nov, Hampshire Surrey border
LaraT #2 EDD 16 Nov,
EasyEggs #5, EDD17 Nov, Kent, (Sussex/Surrey border)
Brightonbaby #1 EDD 18 Nov Brighton&Hove
Dorisdaily #3 EDD 18 Nov
Pavlovthecat #2 EDD 18 Nov
Ninjacat no2 EDD 19 Nov, Bristol
belgianbun #2 EDD 20 Nov, S London
ldeeanna #1 EDD 20 Nov, Truro, Cornwall
Manfrom # 1 (twins) EDD 20 Nov
katster37 #1 EDD 21(or24) Nov, S London
Hamandegger #? EDD 23 Nov, West Sussex
Beepbeep #3 EDD 23 Nov
Turtle23 #2 EDD 22 Nov, London/Surrey border
Claired21 #1 EDD 25 Nov, Glasgow
Flumpity #2 (Twins) EDD 26 Nov,
Laugs #2 26 Nov, Newcastle
Grace09 #1 EDD 27 Nov, Glasgow
Pedalmonster #2 EDD 27 Nov, Surrey
Joycey29 #3 EDD 27 Nov,
Naetha #2 EDD 27 Nov,
FairyBex #1 EDD 28 Nov, Cumbria
raggie #1 EDD 28 Nov, North London
Skorpion #1 EDD 28 Nov

Hi - just thought I'd update my stuff, too.

Update:
Julietbat #2 EDD 28 Oct,
Pinkfizzle #1 EDD 28 Oct, SE London
Koumak #2 EDD 28 Oct (TBC), 12w scan 16 Apr, North London, UCHL
FattipuffsandThinnifers #2 EDD 31 Oct,
ursigurke #1 EDD 31 Oct, West London
Mrsladybug #? EDD 1 Nov,
Mangolassi #2 EDD 1 Nov,
Travelinglight #2 EDD 2 Nov, N London, UCLH
Lillee #? EDD 3 Nov,
Supercherry #2 EDD 4 Nov,
Chocotastic #2 EDD 4 Nov, SE London
Fruitpastels #2 EDD 4 Nov, SE London
Stokey #1 EDD 4 Nov, North London
Homeinthesun #2 EDD 4 Nov,
Gizboss #1 EDD 4 Nov
Lemontop #1 EDD 5 Nov,
Ronniemummy #2 EDD 5 Nov (to be confirmed!!)
Browntrout #2 EDD 6 Nov Manchester
tamlin #2 EDD 5 Nov,
Piper #1 EDD 6 Nov,
BonyM #? EDD 6Nov,
Leannabanana #3 EDD 6 Nov,
BlackLetterDay #3 EDD 6 Nov,
Tabbykat #2 EDD 7 Nov, Kent
Mrsdisorganised #5 EDD 7 Nov (to be confirmed!!)
Scarlotti #3 EDD 7 Nov,
WizzyWoo #2 EDD 7 Nov,
AileenF1 # EDD 8 Nov,
Barnowl #4 EDD 8 Nov,
Munchies37 #1 (Twins) EDD 8 Nov,
sleeplessinthecity #2 EDD 8 Nov, Switzerland
Buttercup EDD 9 Nov,
Catitainahatita #2 EDD 9 Nov,
Helips #2 EDD 9 Nov,
CakeForBreakfast #2 EDD 9 Nov,
Hobnob57 #2 EDD 9 Nov,
Tiddlypom #2 EDD 9 Nov
Cies #1 EDD 10 Nov, Vigo, NW Spain.
QueenNeurosis #? EDD 10 Nov,
PootleTheFlump #1 EDD 15 Nov,
eeyore2 #1 EDD11 Nov,
Grendle EDD 11 Nov,
lynniep #2 EDD 11 Nov, Cambridgeshire
CassORole #? EDD 11 Nov
Weston #2 EDD 12 Nov,
LadyGooGoo #3 EDD 13 Nov, North Wales
roomac #3 EDD 13 Nov, NW London
Tigger32 #3 EDD 14 Nov, East Midlands
Thandeka EDD 14 Nov,
MiniLlace #? 14 Nov,
Southernbelle77 #2 EDD 14 Nov, West Sussex
BeckyBendyLegs #3, EDD 14 Nov, Shorpshire
Barnowl #4 EDD 15 Nov, Hampshire
pinkmich1972 #3 EDD 15 Nov, kent
DeathbyDora #3 EDD 15 Nov, USA
alexdrake #2 EDD 15 Nov, Essex
Kyte #2 EDD 16 Nov, Hampshire Surrey border
LaraT #2 EDD 16 Nov,
EasyEggs #5, EDD17 Nov, Kent, (Sussex/Surrey border)
Brightonbaby #1 EDD 18 Nov Brighton&Hove
Dorisdaily #3 EDD 18 Nov
Pavlovthecat #2 EDD 18 Nov
Ninjacat no2 EDD 19 Nov, Bristol
belgianbun #2 EDD 20 Nov, S London
ldeeanna #1 EDD 20 Nov, Truro, Cornwall
Manfrom # 1 (twins) EDD 20 Nov
katster37 #1 EDD 21(or24) Nov, S London
Hamandegger #? EDD 23 Nov, West Sussex
Beepbeep #3 EDD 23 Nov
Turtle23 #2 EDD 22 Nov, London/Surrey border
Claired21 #1 EDD 25 Nov, Glasgow
Flumpity #2 (Twins) EDD 26 Nov,
Laugs #2 26 Nov, Newcastle
Grace09 #1 EDD 27 Nov, Glasgow
Pedalmonster #2 EDD 27 Nov, Surrey
Joycey29 #3 EDD 27 Nov,
Naetha #2 EDD 27 Nov,
FairyBex #1 EDD 28 Nov, Cumbria
raggie #1 EDD 28 Nov, North London
Skorpion #1 EDD 29 Nov, Oxfordshire

Afternoon all

Great news on all the succesful scans.

Am interested in that programme you are all talking about, might have to see if I can find it on iPlayer.

I work full time and have 2 dc's with bump being no.3. I'd love to work less but there's no way we could afford to lose my salary. I'm amazed at how so many mums can manage to go part time or stay at home, we're obviously doing something wrong in our household

AFternoon all. Not really had a chance to catch up, but hope everyone is doing ok.

I'm having a really down day. I am hating my job (which is a really bad thing to say as a childminder) and considering more than ever doing something else after maternity leave. No idea what, but my heart is not in it anymore. I am just too tired.

scarlotti I hear you - would love to give up work but DH would have kittens - we are products of our own sucess! Ofcourse i guess we could cut back and sacrifice going on holiday (like that family last night- not holiday for 6 yrs!!!) and not have Skye and not get takeaways... etc, but you get used to a lifestyle. Its soooo hard. And of course you end up having to look afte DH too, cooking and ironing etc. SIGH so depressed now! but on the flip side, so lucky to have the oportunity to bring money in. We are in SW London so expensive cost of living here - not sure where you aer scarlotti. May have to play Euro millions this weekend...

southernbelle poor you! DOnt make any rash decisions, you will naturally be more tired than normal... but I always find that an "evaluation matrix" helps in times like this. make a list of all the things you like / dislike about your job and start from there!

southernbelle I understand as I do the same job. It's a very tiring job and I don't know how I got through the first 12 weeks with bad MS and looking after the kids. I'm taking early maternity leave as I can't face being heavily pregnant and bending over to pick up toddlers and change nappies. I've got a day off today and find the more time I have off the harder it is to get motivated again! From what I remember the 2nd trimester is much easier and the tiredness isn't so bad

pedalmonster, yep, when I stopped working, the holidays and eating out stopped (and nope, we don't have Sky or even a TV licence). We also moved out of expensive Oxford to a much cheaper area, and into a much tinier house. It's not a barrel of laughs, but it's do-able (but then, I wasn't earning a fortune before - hence the why-work-to-lose-money dilemma).

Can't say I find being at home toute seule with DS my dream job, but it's only for a couple of years...

Tamlin that's exactly what we did - move away from Oxford after having two DCs! I was gutted that we had to move. We were living in a lovely, albeit tiny, cottage but couldn't afford the mortgage anymore

It's one of the sacrifice of parenthood I guess. We can't afford for me to be a stay-at-home mum with no income and alternatively childcare would be too expensive for me to work full-time. I had intended to go back to work after DS1 but I was taking home about £50 per week! Publishing isn't the best paid occupation in the world. So being freelance is the best possible solution for me. I'm very lucky that my field, online academic publishing, is easy-ish to do from home.

Holidays are in my dad's caravan in Wales. We have freeview but not sky. We don't go out very often but that is not because of money so much as children and lack of babysitting!

Yep - its official - i am at risk and my job does not exist in the new structure. Mentioned to HR that this is very stressful and if the process is not speeded up I shall be seeing my consultant. They didnt even bat an eyelid - obviously know where they stand legally - i am not protected at all.
Now starting to look on the bright side that this may be a good way out of HELL.
hmmm - if i am a stay at home mum then DC's will not be able to go to nursery. OH NO - my sanity!!!!
Tamlin yes it is just a couple of years and you do get to spend the special moments with DC's.

pedalmonster we are in Hove (Brighton) so horrendous cost of living here too, my mortgage makes me weep. I am the main breadwinner so it's a done deal that I have to keep working.
We are considering moving to be closer to family in Aberdeen, but the cost of living isn't much lower there as oil and gas capital of the UK. Still, I'd be happy dropping to 4 days a week as would feel like more of a balance.
I think I'd go stark raving mad being with the dc's full time and I am in awe of all those mums that manage it. Working and nursery is the easier option although the guilt is a hard price to pay.

Oooo loads to catch up on! Really interested to read people's comments on career/mum balance. I am thinking I will absolutely hate going back to work and am going to try and work part time for a while. We will see.

Brightonbaby did you have your second scan at King's?

I am just back from mine - they had to recheck the heart beat which is absolutely normal now - they said all babies reach about 180 in weeks 10 - 11, then it starts to slow down and some start slowing down earlier than others, so mine must just be a late starter on that front! Am also a bit shocked - the Dr had the camera pointing at the baby's, ahem, bits, and asked me if I wanted to know the sex. I said "Erm, I didn't think you could tell the sex this early", and he said "yes, you are having a boy". Now, the problem is my DH ABSOLUTELY does not want to know. How do I a) go 6 months with this knowledge and not let it slip, b) tell him and risk he thinks I asked the Dr, or risk really disappointing him?? My Dad came to this scan with me as DH couldn't get out of a presentation at work.
Also, I am now about to say something awful and I feel terrible for saying it. When he said it was a boy, I felt a bit disappointed. Is that awful? I don't know why, but I was secretly hoping, in my 'big life plan' to have a girl then a boy - I know, I know.... Is that bad? I know it is, and I should be (and am) so happy that the baby is fine, and growing normally etc. I didn't realise I would feel like this. Gosh, I am awful. Did anyone else feel this way with earlier DCs? Sorry if this last paragraph really annoys anyone.

Right, need to catch up on posts.... Apologies for very 'me' post...

Katster wow!! What you are feeling is totally normal. With my first I also had the idea that I'd like a girl marginally more than a boy and did feel a slight pang when he came out a boy and a bit jealous of friends having girl babies. But now I am a big fan of little boys: they are so loving and cuddly and straightforward and I think I have a special relationship with my boys that is a lot to do with the dynamics of mother-son relations. Ok so they hate clothes shopping... but we can live with that! I wouldn't be surprised if I have another boy. I'd like a girl though if I am honest... I think it is totally normal to have a preference with each pregnancy.

Pedalmonster poor you You are so right to be looking on the bright side though...it is the best way to be. At least you know where you stand a bit more now though. Who knows what the future will hold for you. Perhaps if your job does go you'll look back and say 'that was the best thing that could've happened to me'.

pedalmonster - Looking at the bright side is certainly the best thing you can do. I suppose you are getting some benefits if it really happens? And you will have more time for your family. And after the baby is born and you want to go back to work, you might just find the job of your dreams.
Katster - great news about your scan, stupid though that the doctor told you the sex without making sure that you really wanted to know. Your question sounded for him probably like a yes.
If I were you I just couldn't keep the secret so I would tell your husband tonight what happened (I'm sure he will believe you that it wasn't you who asked) and ask him again if he really doesn't want to know if you know. It must be difficult if one knows and the other one doesn't.
And I don't think it is awful that you felt a bit disappointed. For whatever reason you had something specific in mind and you got something different. You just have to get used to it and in November at the latest you will think that there can be nothing better than having a little boy first. And anyway who knows, they sometimes get the sex wrong, especially if examined so early. So you and your husband might still get your surprise in the end

Hi all,

Just popped in to say hi and congratulations to all those with good scan news and hope all those with ms feel better very soon.

Had momentous pregnancy moment this morning - someone offered me a seat on the tube - almost as big a landmark as the 12 week mark! I knew there had to be some advantages to looking 25 weeks pregant as opposed to 15!

RE Isabella Oliver - be warned it is a slippery slope, one order leads to another and another . . . and don't even think about looking (go on look) at tiffany rose and seraphine.

RE Working - had worked full time until this year, am now 3 days a week with lovely long teachers' holidays and is perfect balance. Weekends are free for family time as all chores are done (both ds's are in school) and can now do play dates etc but still enjoy stimulation and companionship at work.

Katster - I have 2 ds's so everyone assumes I want no. 3 to be a girl but I really don't mind. DS's really do adore their mummies (not that DD's don't) but the mother/son bond is very strong - it will be lovely.

Sorry for long post, but feel like I've just about caught up now!

roomac, usigurke and becky thank you so much for your replies. I really was taken aback by how I felt, but I am thinking that mother-son thing really is special, isn't it? I think it might be because both my uncles have really difficult relationships with their mums, and I have seen from my grandmas how upsetting it can be from their point of view. Having said that, my Dad is really close to his mum, as is my DH (although not as close as I am to my own mum).And if I think about the children in my class, I always prefer the boys!! They don't whinge half as much as the girls!
Pedalmonster am just catching up on your news -what a nightmare to be going through this at the minute. I hope you're OK.
Fruitpastels also got info through on NCT classes and really want to join. If only just to meet other mums local to the area as I really don't know many people in this part of London, and none with kids. We also get 2 free NHS ones, and an NHS breastfeeding workshop.