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Connect with mums-to-be with similar due dates to share experiences and support.

July 2009 Part III

911 replies

Mij · 20/02/2009 15:04

Hope no-one minds me kicking this one off - 39 pages seemed a bit unmanageable!

Had 20 week scan today. Tiddler unco-operative to start with (although not as bad as DD was - took 3 goes to see everything) and it looks like most of the bits are in the right places. Decided right at the very last minute not to find out the sex. Realised that, if DD thinks she's going to have a sister, that nothing, not even photographic evidence, will change her mind anyway. So stuck with the 'don't ask don't tell' as per first time around and will just have to wait to sort out all the sodding clothes 'til we know what we've got.

Although... What do gonads look like on a scan?! Got a very good look at the hips from underneath, so to speak, and thought I saw two little bright spots, but that could be the sitting bones of course. Anyone tell me what the crown jewels look like on a scan?!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Cheekycel · 19/03/2009 13:50

Hi All,

Went for scan yesterday and...ITS A GIRL! Really happy and excited even though I had hoped for a boy

DP just wanted to know the sex, whereas sonographer & I were checking for 2 arms, 2 legs etc. TYPICAL MALE hehe.

Bought the first pink goodies yesterday and started looking at prams finally. Anyone used the Graco Mosaic One? Seems quite light & reviews are ok-ish.

Thanks for the number for the maternity exemption card, hadnt received mine either. Just called up now & they're sending a replacement yay!

Thats all for now folks!

mickeylou · 19/03/2009 14:26

congrats on your baby girl cheekycel - have fun buying your pink bits. i have bought a few pink baby grows from next - i went in for mothers day presents but couldnt resist!

Queenfee - how about getting a plain black maternity dress you can wear again and just getting a fab hat to detract from the bump and matching shoes and bag. the races are all about the hats arent they??

thanks for all the advice re c section - i will just have to talk to m/w and be very determined. i'm a lawyer so i can argue with anyone if it comes down to it!!

QueenFee · 19/03/2009 18:49

mickeylou think of it as your latest case! I think mums generally have very good negotiation skills after much practice

I have a plain black dress but somehow jersey just doesn;t feel dressy enough

Misspaella · 19/03/2009 19:34

JLo you are not far off what I must look like. That really made me laugh.

I was a bad mommy today and just let the kids play in the garden this afternoon as opposed to taking them to meet friends/go to park. This weather better not go away or I will have to be more social again.

Even lazier re dinner - we are having a store bought soup and bread tonight. It is a Taste the difference one so hope that redeems me.

Jenny79 · 19/03/2009 20:17

campaigns.direct.gov.uk/money4mum2be/
Great freebie, will definitely claim this next month

ilikeyoursleeves · 19/03/2009 22:23

Hi all, we went to look at a Phil and Teds today and we're gonna get one!!!! I think we'll just order it just now as DS can ride in it himself then we can attach the cocoon once babba is here.

Which means..... we are going to sell our beloved Quinny Buzz. I'm going to put it on ebay but thought I'd say on here first in case anyone is looking to buy a 2nd hand Quinny? It's in excellent condition, red colour (strawberry), and we have the chassis, carrycot, pramseat (two of them, one for when baby is about 6-12 months then the next size up which is roomier), Quinny footmuff, shopping basket, bag that clips on the back to save you carrying a changing bag, mosquito net, Quinny blanket, tyre pump plus 2 raincovers. If anyone is interested let me know... BTW I live in Glasgow but could courier it if needed. I have a cost in mind as it's in brilliant condition and it cost over £600 all in brand new (and is only 16 months old, plus rarely been used for past 8 months due to the MacLaren living in the car and being easier to take shopping with!), let me know if you are interested and we could chat... If you live nearby you could come and look at it or I could email you lots of photos

Off to bed now, to dream of my new Phil & Teds!!!

Gillyan · 20/03/2009 11:20

Hey guys, hope you're all well.

After much agonising and tons and tons of research I have decided I'm going to have an elective section. I see MW next wk for 25wk appoint so I'm going to ask her to refer me to the consultant so I get it booked in. I just can't risk ending up with a colostomy bag especially since finding out my last tear was half a cm away from leaving me with a colostomy bag. In my mind fi you break your ankle, that ankle is always going to be weaker if you do whatever broke it in the first place, does that make sense?? After researching I haven't found many positives about an elective episiotomy stopped an anal tear. All this about the tear coupled with the awful care I had last time I think I'm going to give up on my idea of a better birth and feel I have more chance of tearing again than of any major complications from a planned section. Sorry just thought I'd share this with you all as been up ALL night worrying and haven't even gone into work today...Any comments??

Lillabet · 20/03/2009 12:35

Gillyan As a first timer, I don't have any experience of any of the birth stuff . But I would say that you should just go with what makes you feel safe and comfortable. It may slow your labour and complicate things if you are anxious about tearing again (and the possibility of a colostomy bag). Go with the flow .

BonzoDoodah · 20/03/2009 13:49

Gillyan if that's what makes you feel relaxed about the birth and lets you spend the rest of the pregnancy not stressing about the birth event then it is the right choice for you. Well done for reaching a decision.
ilikeyoursleeves I'm with you on the phil&teds - I have a single I'm using for my DD (19m) and it's super. Just need to buy a doubles kit for when sprog 2 arrives.

Has anyone else been having sharp pains in their lower abdomen (off to the sides mainly)when they stand up quickly? Sometimes I have to sit down again as the pain is so intense . I'm stressing it is my CS scar. Will talk to consultant on Monday but wondering if any of you 1st timers are getting it too?

ActivityApple · 20/03/2009 14:19

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lydiathetattooedlady · 20/03/2009 18:33

HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYONE!
trying to catch up with everyones news, im glad im not the only one already thinking about the birth!!
gillyan i think you should go for what you feel is best for you! bit obvious really but i sometimes feel a bit intimidated by other peoples views on what is best for child birth! if i was in your situation id def go for the c-section!with regards to matb1 form i rang my midwife who siad they wont give it to me til 23 weeks which i am now but cant collect it til monday, i hope its not too late for my S/E maternity forms!
is anyone giving birth at a birthing centre im booked in to mine, but was talking to an old friend who had her first at the same one and said they wouldnt give her pethidine, kept telling her it was locked away and she didnt need it, so then had her second in hospital as she was a bit scared of the birth. the thing is ive been through it once and i KNOW i needed that pethidine and am worried ill be denied it! she also wasnt sure if they still even let you have it at the birthing centre as it is very pro-natural birth, water and gas and air and thats it! i know birthing centres dont offer what hospitals do regarding pain releif but i thoguht they at least did pethidine! sorry im waffling!
anyway im glad its the end of the week, dds' 2nd birthday tomorrow, hopefully the nice weather will stay so we can have a lovely day out. im a horrid mummy and not doing a party but given that i dont know many kids and im so tired and in pain from sciaticca i feel have reasonable excuses! dd has also managed a whole week wihtou nappies (during the day!!) yippee!
p.s. what do people think of the name miles?? i have fallen in love with it but would like other peoples views!!
hope evryone is ok!!

QueenFee · 20/03/2009 20:56

Lydia Miles is a lovely name but my DH dosn't like it
Well done about potty training and don't worry about the party my DCs haven't had one yet. I always arrange a day at the beach and for some reason no one is prepared to drive 20 mins to get there so cheap party
very re pethidine and birthing centre. We don't have the option but that would most certainly put me off (I had pethidine with both DCs)
Gillyan I am glad you have been able to reach a decision. From what I can gather from my research into it, if you have had problems with your tear/scar then it is better to have CS relax and look forward to a nice calm birth now. I am lucky that both of mine healed well with no problems.
Bonzo I have been getting it a lot when I walk or turn over in bed and was wondering what it was?
Ilikeyoursleeves Congrats on the P&T - I love getting a new pushchair (it's more exciting than a new car IMHO!)
I have had a lovely day seeing an old friend. Feeling a bit tired tonight though after it all. I am finding it hard to remember I am pregnant so tend to do a bit much

Mij · 21/03/2009 14:43

Blimey this thread's moving quickly!

Feeling increasingly down and irritable the last few days. Totally worn out, snapping at DP for nowt and had a really daft go at him this morning for eating bagels when we still had (homemade) bread that needed using. Yeah - the really important stuff. And now sitting at work, not working, feeling guilty. I've never got on with hormones, but I don't remember being this crabby last time .

MissP it's not that you're terrible at breastfeeding - it sounds like you had incredibly bad luck with all those infections. And you kept going in spite of it all - I reckon that makes you amazing! Support and information are your greatest tools and I'm guessing you'll know exactly where to get that, and to get it quickly this time around, so I think the odds are very much in favour of success! BTW hope the Kari-me works out now! Feeling responsible . At least they resell on Ebay at good prices

QueenFee WHO training? I haven't heard about that - how did you access that?

JetLi I second QueenFee on getting info on bfing antenatally if you can. And making sure you have all the phone numbers of every supporter within 5 miles or on the end of the phone within easy reach, and use 'em! The phone counselling works very well most of the time - I can see how it's difficult to picture, but IME as a first-time bfeeder, who did use the BFCs a lot, it's not always technical/physical info you need, or at least not only that. Sometimes, after a day when a thoughtless HV or MW has said something unhelpful/ill informed about weight gain, for example, you just need to bawl your eyes out to someone who can reassure you that demand feeding really does work, you're making milk all the time and remind you that you know your baby best. If positioning/latch/something else definintely physical needs working on then yes, it's useful to see someone in person, but lots of BFC/peer supporters will do that too.

hunny that does sound like a good day! The 'no milk' worry is very, very common, perpetuated unfortunately by anecdotes from generations of women told wrongly by HCPs that they had 'low supply'. There is a tiny proportion of women who have a physical problem, and others who for other health reasons, or the drugs they need to take for other conditions, find they can't bf but it's generally lack of the right support/info at the right time that causes problems. As a society we've lost millennia of knowledge about how to do it, all in a couple of generations.

birth stories it sounds like a lot of people had a rough time. I'm almost ashamed to say it out loud, but I just wanted to tell the first-timers, that it can be OK too! Yes, I had a smallish baby, and I'm medium rather than slim build, and I did need a few stitches (although was totally unaware of tearing at the time). But my inner cavewoman took over and it all just - happened. In a kind of a haze. I didn't have pain as such - you can't really relate how contractions feel to anything else, they're incredibly strong but actually not what I'd describe as painful in the way surgery, or a fall, or anything else is painful. Good luck to everyone campaigning for the birth of their choice!

baby's position I thought I was going to have a breech babe with DD, so spent many hours researching how to encourage a good position, and after some of my most hysterical pg moments with torches and frozen peas, and she did turn. So, nearer the time, if anyone want to know the 'lying upside down on an ironing board while watching Dr Who' method of turning a breech baby, just let me know .

God - how long is this post! sorry really should visit more often.

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Gillyan · 21/03/2009 16:48

Feeling better todat since deciding on the section. I feel bad now as had not thought of first timers reading about my bad time. I know that what happened to me is quite rare especially to the extent and that first and second degree tears are more common and not so much of a problem. I feel so bad now as I never talk about it to any pregnant friends. Sorry guys.

Went o a baby sale this afternoon and managed to get a second hand baby bath and a a second hand moses basket with a stand for £10!!!!! Total bargain - I had intended to buy everything new this time as had a lot of second hand stuff last time but the inner bargain hunter is taking over and for the amount of time DD spent in a moses basket and baby bath I'm well chuffed. Also managed to get a Baby Bjorn carrier, a music/lights bouncer and a bum seat thing off someone from work all for £30!! Going to use the bouncer as a spare for upstairs as have 3 floors.

We've ordered a new travel system and have got to buy a new bouncer, play nest/toy arch thing, steriliser, new bedding, hospital bag stuff, mobile, new baby monitor etc so still got loads to splurge on!

Having the 4D scan on 18th April, I'll be 29 weeks then and can't wait to see little girly again.

Just been to Blockbusters and got a couple of DVD's and some popcorn and chocolate fingers and am looking forward to an evening of all the above and maybe a cheeky white wine spritzer!

bozette · 21/03/2009 22:42

Gillyan I think that you are definitely making the right decision. I worked for a while in a unit dealing with that sort of problem and from what you say about your previous tear you're doing the right thing. When I had DS i was secretly very relieved when he was persistently breech and i had a reason for a c-section. I know that most likely i'd have pushed him out without any problems as i'm normal sized and he wasn't enormous, but my experiences at work were rather skewed!

ilikeyoursleeves · 21/03/2009 23:02

Evening all Just spent the entire evening on my ebay advert to sell my Quinny, it looks fab! Hopefully we will get some decent cash for it so it can go towards the new P&T (not ordered one yet but better ASAP in case we are left without a buggy!). BTW for those who already have a Phil & Teds, what's best? Sport or Vibe? (ie is the Vibe really worth the extra cash).

Gillyan it sounds like you've made the right decision re a C Section. I'm with you on that, if my consultant advises me to have one then I will so I can sit down after the birth this time! Given there are pros and cons to a natural birth or a section, it's such a hard decision to make though eh? Oh and what bargains you got today- result!!!

Lydia I like the name Miles but mainly for the fact that yummy Jack Davenport played Miles in 'This Life'- I loved that programme!

Gillyan · 22/03/2009 09:22

Thanks guys for your positive comments re c/section.

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY to all!!

Just heard Jade Goody has died, so sad and today of all days! Poor girl.

JLo2 · 22/03/2009 10:56

Happy Mothers Day everyone!

ActivityApple You have my complete and utter sympathy for the itching, mine is driving me bonkers too. There are days when I really want to take the skin off my legs DS2 wasn't induced but came naturally at 37 weeks, having threatened to come at 35 weeks. At the time my consultant (this was 8 years ago and things change very quickly in the world of childbirth and babies) wouldn't commit to me having him too early and I was booked in for an elective CS at 39 weeks (I had had a previous CS so they wouldn't induce me). I had no problems with DS3 who arrived at 40 weeks. Not sure what is going to happen this time round yet, still not sure whether it is OC or not. Generally when I come out from seeing the consultant I want to throttle them because they can't give me a definite answer (although when I'm feeling a bit calmer I know it's not their fault)

Gillyan Glad you managed to sort out in your own mind what you want. Let us know what happens with the MW/Consultant. I'm sure now that you're clear you'll be able to make it clear to them

Mij I'm with you on the completely irritable front as my DH will vouch for. I just keep reminding myself that that is what he is there for at the moment

Patchybob · 22/03/2009 11:18

Happy Mothers Day everyone.....11.10am and still in my pj's, thats the life!!!

Went to an NCT sale yesterday and got a 3 wheeler buggy as well as a moblie for above the cot and a mamas and papas vibrating chair thingy!? I also got 2 sleeping bags with blue pictures on them even though I don't know what I am having, is the baby trying to tell me!! Very happy with it all.

Off for what I hope will be the final heart scan at the Evenina tomorrow. DH has wangled work so that he will be there which will be good as he missed the 20 week scan.

I am still having sleepless nights about the birth, I really envy you Gillyan having made your decision. We had friends round yesterday one of whom has had 3 c sections and wouldn't have it any other way. She says they were all lovely, calm and very serene. Sounds good to me!! As a result I got no sleep though as I went through everything in my head once again.

When I saw the midwife the other day the baby was in the breech postion. Part of me hopes that it stays that way and then the decision will be taken out of my hands! I do know there is still loads of room to move though so it is unlikely!!!

Enjoy your day everyone. xx

ilikeyoursleeves · 22/03/2009 15:07

Happy Mothers Day everyone! I am just home after having gone out for lunch with DH and DS as it's our 4th wedding anniversary too today The boys are now at grannies watching the football while I am at home on the sofa, only for an hour though cos I then need to go and pick them up again, hmph.

Ooooo and we went to the Pram Centre this morning and bought our Phil & Teds! (Sport version) It's sitting in the hall itching to be assembled but think I'll do it later cos I feel knackered just now.

Good luck Patchybob for your scan tomorrow, hopefully all will be well.

Right, the biscuits are calling.... catch you all later x

BonzoDoodah · 22/03/2009 15:34

Hey patchy - I was helping out at an NCT sale yesterday! Maybe it was the same one? (You've no clues in a profile to say where you are) They're great aren't they ... I sneaked some bargains myself. Am shattered though. Keep forgetting I can't do as much now I'm preg and the non-stop 8 til 3 took its toll on me.

ActivityApple and QueenFee glad it douesn't sound like the C-Section scar that's hurting. (though sorry you are suffering too).

We've just been for a lovely swim - really nice to support the bump and float along. Bliss. Only did a bit as I was shattered and wanted to join DH and DD in the warm baby pool. A lovely afternoon - with the added advantage that sprog is not completely shattered and giving us a couple of hours peace [sigh].

ActivityApple · 22/03/2009 16:31

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Phoenix · 22/03/2009 16:56

Happy Mothers Day

Yesterday must have been the day for NCT sales, i went to one too . I got some clothing bits and pieces, A Tiny Love cot mobile and A Tomy Freestyle carrier. I know where there is another sale Saturday too so going to have a look for some more bargains

Gillyan · 22/03/2009 18:02

patchy It would be so much easier wouldn't it if the decision was made for us! Good luck with your scan and yes I fear your little baba will have plenty of time to turn round yet!

JLO2 I had a really severe allergic reaction once that lasted for 4 months, all my skin was soo itchy and I found the E45 stop itch cream really good and a cream called Eurax which you can buy over the counter or on prescription. I read somewehere that avoiding hot showers as well as baths can help.

I went to another baby sale thingy today and got some socks with toys on for babies to play with their feet and I got a maternity top and a pair of enormous maternity PJ bottoms for £3! very comfy.

Yeah hope I don't have any trouble now with MW/ Consultant, Like JLO2 said I'm sure now I know what I want I'll get my own way.

Have decided to move DD to the spare room ( bigger one ) in next few weeks and do it up for her so now I can do the nursery too! Yey!

Looking forward to Dancing on Ice tonight. Is it wrong to fancy Ray and Donal?? I'm not getting any! That could be why!

ActivityApple · 22/03/2009 18:38

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