Due April 2009 - Sod the thread title, we will need a new one in a week.

[PuzzleRocks]

Welcome new joiners, lurkers, occasional updaters, prolific posters, and Nutty and Springy .
I say this one wont last a full 10 days.

Why do they have to have so many threads on chickens then?

They managed to keep chickens in the first series of Big Brother & they were all imbeciles. The chicken thread people are obviously just making heavy weather of it

& he would definitely be happy to teach us all. He's ace. This is from about 3 years ago:

The man wears a monocle!

Is he saying that they'll eat each other if you let them try meat?

The people that lived in my last house before me bought it without really exploring the garden, which is very long, and was overgrown then.

On the first morning they heard this tap tap tap at the back door and opened it to find that the previous occupants had left their chickens behind, and the chickens had come up to the house, expecting to be fed!!

LOL

My MIL has chickens, and a blardy cockerel. Bet the neighbours are impressed. No chicken tips from me though, as she's managed to kill more than she's kept. I could be chief list-writer and courier to all our DP's (once I can get back into my leathers again). Agree would need a veggie box, I can raise potatoes (that's about it) for all us poor anaemic souls.

Ooh I want to be the chicken keeper! And I'll milk the cows and make cheese... Organic Stilton, anyone?? My other contributions would be -

Growing organic vegetables and fruit to keep us healthy

Farming the odd pig / cow / turkey etc to keep us in tasty roasts and sausages

Teaching cricket, rugby, tennis, swimming etc to the kiddies after Boffin's done with them in the classroom

Organising hiking expeditions and picnics all over the estate

Five-star, cordon-bleu catering for all residents and guests (i KNEW that Hotel School degree would come in handy!!)

Making sure the library books are rotated regularly

Setting up, marketing and running our website, including online shop for afore-mentioned organic products - we'll make a fortune!

Oh and DH is fab at foot massages...

They left their chickens behind? Poor things!

I've only just started typing up my many pages of notes into a formal assignment & have already managed over 500 words. Based on that, I think I'm going to be at least double the 2000 word limit after endless worrying that I wouldn't have enough to pad it out & it's all going to end up crammed into appendices & footnotes. Ridiculous.

Ah Springy, that brings back memories. I used to worry my essays would need padding and then go way over the word count limit. Making me feel quite old, actually, as my uni days ended 11 years ago. Oh to go back to those carefree days of student debt...

Hello all just woken up. I am RUBBISH at being bedridden I just fall asleep. I am so glad you are all great at cooking, it's the one thing I can't really bring to the commune..but I will provide:

Mathematical stimulation for all (Johnny Ball style)

Original murals (every commune needs them)

Decent DIY skills for when if the DH types cock it up

Superior skills with Playdough for all children of the commune

Excellent financial planning

Storytelling for bedtime

Oh and a couple of horses

Can I come now?

Oh Nutty how sweet is your DD! I've spent all day trying to catch up while pretending to work... anyone else finding that their work brains are shutting down in preparation for maternity leave / birth / caring for baby? I can't concentrate on anything!

Commune sounds great but can we NOT move to Derbyshire please as it would be too close to my MIL? How about somewhere near the seaside instead. DH can shoot although most of the time he misses... so far he's brought home a rabbit and a duck... I am good at mackerel fishing (bit of a random skill) and an excellent sandcastle builder. Oh and DH makes the most amazing things out of sticklebricks. Any good?

BoffinMum you've got to promise that you give me singing lessons though!

Forgot to say... I also have a very entertaining 22 month old who loves to dance until she's dizzy and falls over.

Hello all, a bit of a tough day today for me. I was supposed to get all my DDG (Daily Domestic Goddes) routine done because the house is a complete wreck and it's all just piling up... but I've had a headache all day and my breasts are killing me -I'm thinking the milk is coming in -and I didn't sleep well either last night.

I love the idea of a commune. I can weave placemats and tablerunners and make blankets for all the beds and some nice rugs for the floors (if I'm allowed to bring in a slightly bigger loom than I have now). I can also do some baking and cooking, and add books to the library.
DH can take lovely pictures and keep all the bicycles in top running order. He will also fix any cars and do any computer programming we need.

Ooh, ooh, I could run the commune choir!!

Here's a new property near the seaside, 11 miles from Bude in Cornwall, with the option of some good farmland. Look at[http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-6088164.html?pageNumber=3&backToListURL=%2F property-for-sale%2Ffind.html%3FlocationIdentifier%3DREGION%255E61384%26minBedrooms%3D5%26displayPro pertyType%3Dhouses%26oldDisplayPropertyType%3Dhouses%26index%3D20&propertyType=houses&locationIdenti fier=REGION^61384&radius=0.0&minBeds=5 this page]].

Kittycat we won't starve with you around and I am sure we will make a fortune.

Mathsmummy, horses as well ... and maths ... and finance ... you're in!!

Bleuravin, I was hoping you would volunteer some crafts. There must be a barn we can give you for your loom. BTW meant to tell you, I went on a great Woad Dying course at Woad Inc in Norfolk in the spring. I would strongly recommend it.

Nutty, how lovely is your DD! She can marry my DS2, he will look after her.

Can I volunteer my mother for the fox hunt as well? Does it have to be just MILs?

Can't do ruddy links.

www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-6088164.html?pageNumber=3&backToListURL=%2Fproperty-f or-sale%2Ffind.html%3FlocationIdentifier%3DREGION%255E61384%26minBedrooms%3D5%26displayPropertyType% 3Dhouses%26oldDisplayPropertyType%3Dhouses%26index%3D20&propertyType=houses&locationIdentifier=REGIO N^61384&radius=0.0&minBeds=5

Tee hee... MIL's on fox hunts... love it!!

As far as I know the fox hunting laws only apply to foxes so presumably it would be OK to use MILs in drag hunts as fodder.

I'm also ok at making candles, making cards, and making bead jewelry.

Is there any relief for burning breast symptoms? Ice packs are just too cold and make my...um... nipples too taut and causes more, but different, pain...

I will advise you in my capacity as commune First Aider. I'd be inclined to soak them in a basin of tepid water, Bleuravin. I will look up a homeopathic remedy now as well while you soak.