Fab Feb 2009: holy shit, this is it

[chilledmama]

Cause Swampster has a dirty mouth
Wouldn't hear me speaking that way...much
How do we delete threads????

ahh, you see i'm the opposite. my labour with ds stopped when i left dd as i was so worried about her (pfb who had never been left before and my mother was with her which i knew would be a disater)

part of what upsets me so much this time about not being able to afford a HB is that i'll have to leave them again.... i'd actually be more comfortable with them close by. when i woke up in labour with ds dd was in the bed with me and i think she sensed what was going on... she kept giving me kisses and cuddles during contractions and it was really lovely and soothing, when dp brought her outside to play labour practically stopped and when she was close it was much stronger.

but then i'm weird

how old are your kids? could they go for a 'sleepover' with schoolfriends? would any of your family be up for a spanish holiday to be on call to take them off somewhere when you go into labour?

MS puts a pot on the stove and opens a commune for the heavily pregnant ladies of Feb 09

My DD (19 months) has just got herself on the sofa, laid down, put her feet up on the arm, lifted her top and stroked her tummy...........don't know where she got that from.....

if my DH had been entitled to paternity pay, it would've only been the £117 per week....so by doing it unpaid, we lose £234 minus tax etc....so we decided to go for it....as I'm still being paid and I'm going to need the help after a CS....feeling lucky that we can...we're each still buying our full entitlement of nursery vouchers (to build up a supply for when I go back to work) as well so February is going to be a beans on toast month for us!

LMN - sounds like you need to send your DH round to Markstretch's commune to get some good home cooking in for you for Feb...

Its crazy how paternity leave policies vary from place to place. At my work place, its 2 weeks on statutory pay but you can also tag 2 weeks paid holiday (assuming you've save enough) on to that so end up being sort of half paid for 4 weeks. No such luck at DH's place...

oh god i was away for a couple of hours and i've missed LOADS of chat again! I just can't keep up.

LMN - i guess i'm not into the idea of a cs because i don't want to give up on a chance at vaginal birth but also cos of the recovery and having dd to look after. it took me monoths to get over it last time. Having said that i know a planned cs should be easier.

Got my appointment through for 12:30 monday for ECV, i'm going to have a good think over the weekend and i guess i can cancel it if i decide to go with the elective section. I thought it was probably better to make the appointment and have a bit longer to make the decision rather than decide on a definite ECS now when she could turn herself by monday anyway.

Mamagoose i am extremely of you HB. Glad you're over the food poisoning and all looks ok.

PT - glad it wasn't a dead animal, just a dead vegetable

As for the paternity, could do with baby being late really as it will be closer to half term then dh won't need to take so much time, another reason to avoid going for the ECS.
It's mad really that men aren't entitled to paid time off for paternity, it's not as though having a baby is something people do every year for a bit of extra holiday. Depressing what a crap attitude towards parenting is held in the UK

It is odd isn't it.....he has been employed for the whole of my pg, just not the same employer, which makes him ineligible ....have to say that IBDI's employer sound as if they have been even more unfair........clearly paternity rights have some way to go....I'm very lucky as I get full pay for 8 weeks, half pay for 18 weeks (+ SMP) and then SMP only for 13 weeks.....and I've tagged on 5 weeks A/L to either end. I'll also be working my 10 keeping in touch days (from home) but claiming all the money for them during the SMP only period!

X post IDBI.....recovery is certainly something to take into account...especially if DH can't be there to help as much as he'd like...

I agree, paternity rights are crap.

They are within their rights but it doesn't make you feel particularly good about your employer when they treat you like this, especially since they refused to pay him for the half day he took to come to my 23 week scan (the one after they found the echogenic bowel and were talking through test results). They are total bastards in my opinion.

That is unbelievable IDBI. You're right - they're total insensitive bastards!!

i know dinky, and they stupidly put him on the wrong pay scale when he started so for 2 months he was about 8 points below what he should have been. We had fun finding the mortgage in sep and october after no wage for the summer i can tell you....

Bloody hell IDBI for you.

My DH's previous employers took a half day's pay from my DH when his dad died . I rung him at 10.30am to tell DH he had died (we were expecting it) and he finished the job he was on at the time before coming home so he didn't leave anyone in the lurch, and then when he got paid that month, he'd been deducted pay for that afternoon.....(and was only given 5 days compassionate leave....the day of the funeral was A/L)

I'm very lucky where I work.....

LMN some people must just totally lack any human emotion!

I think what i'd like is to go in to labour this weekend and on getting to hospital discover she's flipped round the right way again. [living in a dream emoticon!]

at LB hahahaha - sorry. I answered the door to the postie who required a signature so put DS, who was over my shoulder, down and stood up to discover I hadn't done up my clip down top or bra - major boobage exposure!

£50 IDBI? Gosh! I was looking at acupuncture last night incase this one turns again but didn't realise it was that much.

Grrr to the paternity pay problems - DH doesn't get the standard 2 weeks either so has been saving his leave to take. Apparantly he has some big cases on atm so he could even be in a position where they cancel leave at a moments notice and call him back in . Like IDBI said - It's not like we do this every year!

My breakfast guests turned into lunch and afternoon tea guests as well which means I'm knackered and cant be arsed to cook. Will be sending DH out for a takeaway I think

spotty - that's ing! i always ignored the door when feeding dd. I won't have that luxury with dd marching round going "there's someone here mummy, answer the door mummy" etc etc

Right, I know I missed the sling discussions several threads back but I never claimed to be the brightest start in the sky .

Any of you sling wearers fancy helping me out with this please?

sling decisions

Or star even. (I rest my case!)

Just quickly scanned messages

Laidback - lol your bra incident is hysterical!

Mumoverseas - thanks again for your info - I am still fuming about the obs registrar and have booked an appointment with GP on Monday to get an urgent referral to an orthopedic consultant. The ridiculous thing is that I am having baby at Stoke Mandeville which has some of the best back specialists in the world - but can I get to speak to them??

Herb - hope everything is ok?

Just dropped DS off at my mums for the weekend - first time he's been away overnight without me. He's only been there 2 hours and now I want him back...even though the lie-in tomorrow will be lovely....

Hello everybody, I'm new to Mumsnet and was wondering what the etiquette is to gatecrash birth threads - I'm due on 14th Feb

Spotty - I had two slings with DS and both were great for different reasons.

Baby Bjorn - good firm support for little babies and comfortable for going on long walks etc - still used it when DS was over a year. Tri-cotti sling (basically two circles of stretchy fabric) great for around the house with baby up to about 9 months as it is super comfy but it does stretch a lot with a bigger baby (but pings back to original size when you wash it).

Hello Pempe - do join in!

Laidback I'm laughing at your delivery experience, hehehehe.
dinkys sorry you still unwell with that nasty cough.
LMN Having a little giggle at your dd on the sofa, must be soooo cute.
I make ds stroke and kiss my belly, and when I point at it and say "who's in there?" He says "Buba". Lately he has taken to kissing Dada's 'buba' hehehe

We went to the play scheme this morning, I walked in to choruses of "OMG, haven't you had that baby yet?" and "Why are you still pregnant?" nd "not long now" and I wanted to yell "F*CK OFF!!!!!" but just smiled nicely and agreed "not long now".........

Herb Hope you're ok and everything has calmed down on the cramps and the spotting......

Still having some funny cramps here, but the last few days seems to be happening in the early evening and then settling down so no panic just yet!
I got a call from the team leader of mw's who said the one I saw on DAU told her I was very upset and unhappy and I wasn't competely satisfied with the care I have been receiving. The TL was very nice and understanding, we spoke through a few things like the clinic being closed at my appointment time, how I've had trouble seeing a mw as receptionist keeps telling me to see gp, how I've seen so many different people and how all urine samples have been sent to labs on different numbers (gp sends on NHS number and mw on hospital number) so no one knows exactly how long this has gone on for), and how pissed off I am that it has not been successfully treated, and everything else. I also said that I fully understand that they are busy and short staffed across the board and that I by no means want to tke up extra time or anything, but that when I call the clinic because I am worried or frightened, I expect to be taken seriously.
She was very helpful in calming me down about this whole GBS and told me to ignore them telling me to dial 999 (thank god) and that I can take some time to calmly sort out ds and maybe have something to eat, and if lo arrives quickly, it's easy enough to treat him too and he will be very closely monitored, so I am back to breathing now
Hope everyone else is ok.

COME ON BABIES

Pempe Hello
I'm due on 10th. If you scroll up the thread, we have a post with everyones due date etc, have a quick look and add yourself on.

Will look at the tri-cotti Calico, thanks. Hope you dont miss him too much tonight, will you know what to do with yourself with a lie-in??! Have just arranged for mum to take DS back to hers when I'm in hosp - it'll be the first night apart, and no lie in to compensate!

Hi Pempe! Justme has just joined too and she's due 14th! Will update the list in a mo.

Evening LBB - Glad you're feeling a bit calmer about everything

welcome pempe

am leaving that damn chicken to lurk in the fridge another day.... sure it'll be fine, it only deforsted itself properly last night

spotty.... i was once running around soft play with dd and ds decided to unlatch himself for a look around right as i was running past the only dad in the building

lbb... glad you finally had a postive experiance with your ante natal care... glad she could put you mind at rest a bit about the GBS, you must be feeling alot calmer now.