Jingle Bells, Mysterious Smells, Fab Feb 2009 babies will soon be on their way - Oh what fun it is to waddle around like an overstuffed turkey all day.

[dinkystinky]

Hello lovely ladies, the new thread is open for business

LBB - I can understand you cancelling from the POV of baby coming whenever it wants to....but you may as well see it one last time before it comes out? I would. I had a growth scan 4 days before DD was born....just because I could really....

That's what I'm thinking Norty I get to see him again, and would love that! & weeks til due date just seems so long, and I've memorised every detail of 22 wk scan so would be lovely to see what he looks like now. On the other hand, I don't want to waste anybodies time or take an appointment slot that someone else could have that actually needs it. Really don't think that whatever they say will effect my feelings about it now anyway. Like you say it's all hit and miss and if they said he was a reasonable size and could be delivered early (the thought is sooooo appealing) and I agreed, he got here and was smaller than expected, how would I live with myself?

Well it's not every night but it happens quite often. I understand that children cry but my neighbours seem to have very little respect for how it affects other people and the yelling they do just doesn't work!

I just feel bad for DH when he has to work 12 hrs shifts managing a struggling ambulance service on very little sleep! We have even put procedures in place should our own baby cry through the night but having to listen to someone elses and not being able to do anything about it really takes the biscuit!

Anyway, we have had plans drawn up for soundproofing already, I am going to make some calls and find out how much it will cost but like you say I feel it will improve our lives dramatically.

Sorry for moaning on everyone

You wouldn't be taking up an appointment....just letting the sonographer get off a bit early ....if someone needs an appointment, they get one! Would they induce you if it was a big baby? Not sure my hospital would. I was told 4 days before DD was born she was a good 6lb baby....and she was 6lb 7oz.

TBH, I haven't really enjoyed this pg as you know, or been as excited this time round, but now I'm off work, I'm looking forward to a good few weeks of just me and DD, and although immobile and tired, I know that when baby is here, things are gonna be 10x more hectic than they are now, so am not bothered if this one isn't early. (DD was a 38 weeker).

Moan away MS I do! It really does sound awful. How well do you know them? Is there any way you could talk to them about it? Maybe they don't realise how thin the walls are and would deal with it differently if they knew? I only say that because my downstairs neighbour who I am semi-friendly with mentioned that she can tell when I'm in a foul mood because my already loud footsteps get very strong. I know I'm heavy footed, but had no idea it was waking her at night and now, if I remember, I try to walk tip-toes

True Norty about getting an app if you need one. I don't know what they'd do, think they're just humouring me because I cried. Like I've said before, I am/more now was petrified of going through childbirth again. We had forceps delivery so I had the pain and the pushing and the tearing and everything else and didn't even get to the good bit, so when I thought about how hard it was without actually delivering him on my own and to have to do it again, I started to think ok, the smaller the better iyswim.
Maybe I should go and just see what they say. Just because I allow them to scan, doesn't mean if they recommend early del that I have to consent does it? Although I'd look a bit stupid after all that

LBB - what did DS weigh? Have to say, that as I had an emergency CS, I'm not in a position to offer any advice, but having said that, having done 26 hours of labour before, I'm terrified of doing it again and just want someone to agree to an elective CS....so similar type of thing really. Have you discussed this with your MW?

Sorry first-timers....just ignore me and read the positive birth stories

Ds was 9lbs 10oz. So only just a big baby. the thought of possibly having a 10lber is terrifying. Not sure why though.
That Growing Babies program had a bit in it that said the fathers genes encourage growth to ensure survival etc, but the mothers genes counteract this so her baby would never grow too big for her to deliver, which in the sense of survival makes perfect sense doesn't it?
I am not a small person either, so it's not like a 10lb baby would kill me. And the big babies are easier to not worry too much about if they miss a feed or something.....
I have spoken to dr's and mw and get a mixed response. Some say that if they are aware of the posibility, there is no need to have a baby over 8/9lbs and some say different. The mw I saw on friday basically told me to stop being so pathetic (she's probably right)

My friend had emergency CS with her first and then demanded CS with ds2. She had been in labour a long time like yourself and they agreed to second one pretty easily I think. I hope you get yours

LBB - unless there is a pressing medical reason (for you or baby) you dont need to be induced, even if they suggest it. So you can go to the scan and just see little one again and that will be that if you want it to be.

Yes dinky maybe I will still go. Can't do any harm I suppose and at least I'd be prepared mentally.....

Having moved my due date has been moved forward a few days (not sure it will make the slightest difference) but have updated anyway...

TinkerBellesMum - DC3 (girl), due: 01.02.09 (already gone further than we thought I would) (age 27, Birmingham)
Laidbackinengland - DC4, due: 23.01.09 (age 34, North Devon)
Nkweto - DC2, due: 30.01.09 (age 35, West London)
Oooggs - DC4, due: 30.01.09 (age 34, Cornwall)
Mamagoose - DC3, due: 31.01.09 (age 32, Spain)
idontbelieveit - DC2 (girl), due: 02.02.09 (age 31, Leeds)
Questionkid - DC1, due: 03.02.09 (age 33, Wallington, Surrey)
PinkTulips - DC3, due: 04.02.09 (age 24, Roscommon, Ireland)
MsLucy - DC2 (a boy), due: 4/2/09 (CS a few days early)(age 38, North London)
Swampster - DC3 (a boy), due: 06.02.09 (age 40 , London)
Rosieposey - DC4 (a boy), due: 06.02.09 (age 36,Swindon,Wiltshire)
MarkStretch - DC2 (a boy), due: 07.02.09 (age 29, Norwich)
onwardandoutward - DC2, due: 07.02.09 (age 35 South West)
LittleMissNorty - DC2, due: 08.02.09 (age 40 in a couple of weeks, Kent)
stacysmom - DC1, due: 08.02.09 (age 36, Kent)
KT1983 - DC1, due: 09.02.09 (age 25, London)
KazzaL - DC2 (suprise flavour), due: 10.02.09 (age 35, Cirencester, Gloucs)
littleboyblue - DC2, (another boy) due: 10.02.09 (age 26, Middlesex)
Sorkycake - DC4 (a girl), due: 10.02.09, (34, NorthEast)
jenniferturkington- DC2 (a girl), due: 11.02.09
herbgarden - DC2, due: 11.02.09 (CS 02.02.09) (age 38, Berkshire)
Munteria - DC2, due: 11.02.09 (age 37, Putney)
TheHouseofMirth - DC2 (a boy), due: 12.02.09 (age 38, Wimbledon)
Jellybaby - DC2 (a girl), due 14.02.09 (age 30, Cheshire)
Littlesez ? DC1 (a girl), due: 15.02.09 (age 28, Manchester)
America - DC2 (a boy), due: 16.02.09 (age 32, London)
Scubagroover - DC1 (a boy), due: 17.02.09 (age 31, London/ Kent)
Rachrox - DC4 (a boy), due: 18.02.09 (age 28, Cheltenham)
Catstar - DC2 (a boy), due: 18.02.09 (age 36, Chessington)
Mentalpup - DC2, due: 18.02.09 (age 31, Cheltenham)
Dinkystinky - DC2 (a boy), due: 19.02.09 (age 32, London)
McDreamy - DC3, due: 19.02.09 (age 37 Bucks)
Pluto DC2, due: 19.02.09 (Age 38, Kent)
DizzyBrummie - DC2, due: 20.02.09 (age 36, Berkshire)
Calico1 - DC2 due: 21.02.09 (age 40, West Herts)
mrsy - DC1 (a girl), due: 22.02.09 (age 24, Maidstone, Kent
Winemakesmummyclever - DC2 (a boy), due: 23.02.09. (age 35, Manchester) expecting cs @ 39 weeks
Spottyshoes - DC2, due: 24.02.09 (age 28)
Lardybump - DC2, due: 24.02.09 (age 34)
eejaykay - DC1 (a boy), due: 24.02.09 (age 34, London)
Chilledmama - DC2 (a girl), due: 25.02.09 (age 32, Southsea)
Pinkbabybump - DC2 (a girl), due: 25.02.09 (age 36, Cornwall) CS booked for 20.02.09
Cocodrillo - DC3, due: 26.02.09 (age 34 at the mo, London) expecting a CS at 38-39 weeks
ihavenewsockson - DS2, due: 26.02.09 (age 25, Surrey)
mumoverseas - DC4 (a boy), due: 28.02.09 (CS 2 to 3 weeks early) (age almost 41 Arabia/Crawley West Sussex)

Sorry LBB, I can see where you're coming from a bit more now. (apologies, you've probably told me all this before) If a large growth scan is going to freak you out then.....but OTOH, if you decide to be induced early, I'm sure they wouldn't do it without being certain that he is a good weight. Small size doesn't always equal easy birth though from what I've gathered. (Is any birth nice?)

Nice sympathetic MW you've got there then

Sorry if I'm going over old stuff, but what about an epidural?

My mum said delivering my bro was easier than me and he was over 3lbs heavier than I was. TBM has also said that bigger is easier.
Don't think it'd freak me out, would actually be nice to know.
I have a huge needle phobia thing and would rather not have an epidural, I would have to wait until in unbearable pain I think and then might be too late anyway. I wanted one with ds but didn't get it.
I had a spinal block with ds which is 6 needles, it took them ages because they kept bending them
Would rather not have to sit through that again. Plus they really scare you when they say about how important it is to not move (sorry to those planning on having epi)

I'm not a fan of needles, but after 24 hours of contractions, I couldn't care less.....it depends a lot on the anaesthetist as well I think.

Sounds like you had a horrible experience, and like me, wasn't all that long ago. Those who say you forget....you don't IMO.

My epidural wasn't at all traumatic, I was given a pillow to hug (and DH) and because you can't see what is going on, it helps. And the relief it gave me was amazing

I'm sure that a different team, different baby etc, all will be a different experience this time. I know a lot of people who said that 2nd time round, things were very different as they was expecting it to be the same as last time.

Sorry, I'm trying to be reassuring but failing miserable

Hahaha. Hope you're right. True though, by the time they had realised that ds was laying diagonally and the 3 hours of pushing I'd done was a huge waste of time, i didn't care about the needle(s), it was hard though as I was so big, I couldn't hunch over enough so had dp pulling my shoulders down. They'd taken G&A away and I was still contracting whilst sitting on operating table and activly pushing thinking don't move, don't move.
But previously, every position I found that I was comfortable in, ds's heart rate dropped so they'd only allow me to lay on my back.

I agree, you don't forget, the edge is taken off I think and really, the joy you get becoming a parent makes those few days all worth it

Right, just realised it's gone 10 o'clock, ds is looking like he's hypnotised in front of telly, we have to get washed and dressed and get to supermarket for some dinner.
Thanx for going over all this again with me norty and dinky you are right, I might as well see him again.

OMG, at least my injections were done in-between contractions....I agree its pretty difficult bending over with a huge bloody lump in front of you!

If you need an anaesthetist this time, ask for someone experienced....

and I totally agree, its all worth every minute of it....just took me a few days to realise that

(won't be doing it again though )

So are you going? If you are, hope it goes well and enjoy the experience x

For what its worth, I think you should do whatever you need to in order to be as relaxed as possible for your birth - if it means asking for a C-section, then do it; if it means asking for pain relief, then do it; if it means conquering a fear of needles to have an epidural (I had one LBB and it sounds a lot less scary than the spinal block you had - just one needle and done v quickly) then do it - the more relaxed you are, the better it will be for you and your baby.

I think that most maternity units offer you a post birth counselling service - or give you a number you can call afterwards. If you do have a scary experience (which for first timers, isnt a given!) you can contact them and having a birth debrief may help you get over issues from the birth and find closure - though as far as I was concerned, I just wanted to focus on my beautiful little boy!

Scan's booked for the 5th so not for another 2 weeks, but need to make definate decision now. I prob will go, if just to see him. We've got the appointment so might as well use it. I change my mind when I remember something that the health care team have done to annoy me and trhen think I want as little to do with them as poss and think as this isn't routine I shouldn't keep putting myself infront of them for them to say something really bloody stupid!

dinky they did offer me the birth reflections thing after ds was born, but like you say, I just wanted to concentrate on him and didn't see the point in re-living everything that quite upset me. Didn't see the point at all, it's not like my notes would have sai "lbb requested help bf her baby, but we couldn't really be bothered so we ignored her for half an hour and then when she came to the nurses station to ask for a bottle we told her she couldn't have one because her notes say she is bf" Or would they have said "lbb abd baby spent all night sitting in the family room instead of being on the ward, the baby constantly cried because she was having trouble feeding, so we told her not to come back to bed until the baby stopped crying"?

Listen to me! I'm super bitter. Sorry again to 1st timers. I'm very unlucky with health care, sometimes think I must be making it up as all this can't happen to 1 person?

Are you giving birth in the same hospital LBB?

I totally agree with Dinky....a relaxed mum = a better time of it - irrespective of what is considered to be "right"....

for you.....

lbb - agree with Dinky that the hospitals are quite good at running through your fears (or speak to HV) about your previous experience if you ask them. I too have a massive needle phobia but I was so peed off after waiting 12 hours for an anaesthetist I think I was just relieved to see him (I was being induced and labour hadn't started) but when he did it I just tried to focus on something else - at least there is no chance of you being able to see anything. I do think particularly with a lot of the needle things the thought is worse than the deed if you are able to not panic and rationalise it at the time but it's not a nice phobia to have especially in childbirth if you want pain relief (I did).

norty - are you not booked in for a c-section (sorry can't remember) - who do you have to convince?? Did they not just give you the choice if you had one last time ? I just told them I wanted another one due to the experience last time (and them telling me that there was a high chance of a repeat performance) and they produced the diary out of the drawer there and then and booked me in ? Sorry if you've told us this before.....

MS - sorry about your night antics. Miserable when you've got to hear someone else's child all night. Hope you can get some soundproofing sorted out.

The cd player sounds cute dinky. DS has one of those cash registers with a mic on it and he loves yelling through it. Aren't they cute when they try to sing

I've just had to go down to the nursery (luckily 5 mins from work) to get poor DS. He wouldn't take any Calpol from them and seems to have a high temp. DH has taken 3 days leave and these are my last 2.5 days before mat leave starts. Had to phone him to get him off the golf course . As I was waiting for DH to arrive (he had car with car seat and buggy with him) the poor little mite chucks up all over himself and the playground of nursery. Fortunately for me, he missed me save for a splodge on the sleeve of my top but he is looking so poorly I didn't really want to hand him over to his daddy - he just wanted a cuddle. We could be in for a fun week !

herb your poor ds. At least the sick missed you

Yeah, we're back at the same hospital, I told mw at 16wk appointment that I didn't want to go back there she asked why and I said because I didn't like it and had quite a rough time (there's also been lots of stories in papers about this hos) and she referred me to GP for PND
By the time \i found out I could book somewhere else it just felt a bit late to be messing around tbh.
This time will be better because I'll know what to expect, I'll be alot more prepared than I was with ds and have stated that in no uncertain terms, we are leaving the hospital the minute he passes that first stoll (unless there is a serious medical prob)

Aww Herb....poor DS....hope he's ok and gets over it quickly.

Last time I was at the hospital I was about 20 weeks I think and I was stating my case for an elective CS, but I was talking to a very junior doctor who was very inexperienced, so I gave up....she was banging on about VBAC etc etc, but I have done my research and it is an informed decision....so battle begins next Monday when I have ante-natal at the hospital again, and this time, I will see someone more senior and make my point....and hopefully get a date.