Dec Mums - Christmas is coming...the Dec ladies have got all fat...time to have our babies...the novelty's worn flat

[Beans33]

Here's a new link for us all - think it needed doing asap as running out of space!!

Just been talking to a friend and she said she didn't reconise contractions the second time. She ended up giving birth in a layby because she went into full labour without realising.

Hope it doesn't happen to me.

GOOD LUCK KATIE - how exciting - will be thinking of you! Hurray!!!

xx

oh don't Kayz, i am obviously not wanting anything long and drawn but am a little worried about it happening very quickly and sans MW.

Verso shame you're back in hospital but good to hear Frieda is recovering well - hope you're back home soon. Also thanks for the advice about breastfeeding - part of me is hoping it's just all going to fall into place straight away this time, but the more realistic part of me thinks it's going to be hellish again, at least at the beginning. Interesting to know about the changing advice on latching on - I hadn't realised that was something that was subject to fads as well, like so much of the other advice we are given.

BTW on breastfeeding, I came across this site the other day which I found really useful when I was struggling last time around. It's got loads of videos on it and advice about all kinds of problems, and definitely worth a look if you want to familiarise yourself with latching techniques or if you are having difficulties breastfeeding. I'll probably post it again later on when we've all got going. Actually just noticed that one of GBB's link has some of the same videos on it but as this is the original site it might have more of them on (it seems to have more on than last time around so I think some of them might be new). Agree that the breast compression bit is v useful.

LadyT good to have you back & thanks for your birth story. Really glad to hear DP made it to the birth. Re the rummaging, a friend of mine had a CS a couple of weeks ago & described it as feeling like she was a washing machine and they were getting the washing out of her. I'm not surprised you didn't get the immediate rush (especially if you were off your face on morphine for 2 days!). As others have said, it doesn't necessarily hit you straight away anyway - when DS was born I didn't feel detached exactly but just too knackered and spaced out to feel overwhelmed with emotion, and that was without drugs or a traumatic birth. Interesting what you said though Verso that it's happened with both of yours - I was kind of expecting to get the immediate rush this time round just because I'm now in motherhood mode. Not that I'm going to beat myself up if I don't or anything, just that it feels like my brain is wired differently now since having DS, if that makes sense. Oh and LadyT I don't think you're being a diva at all on the pn care front - I had pretty much daily visits I think (but probably because DS was losing weight I think - don't know how many you'd get normally). I hated it actually - the having to get showered & dressed first thing then try to stay awake until they arrived even though you're desperate for a kip, on top of all the other visitors. Just the having to wear clothes bit was so painful because of my shredded nipples. Then they'd arrive (different one every day), give you a load of rubbish advice which contradicted what the last one had said, made you feel like a useless piece of crap, try to get you to formula feed then leave. And as for HVs - well the one who came to our house (just the once) was fine but the others I've come into contact with at the clinic since are mostly absolute loons.

Turnip ta for posting chutney's message - just seen that. Bad news on the GBS (well good and bad as at least you know about it) and great to hear it shouldn't interfere with the waterbirth. Got the result of my urine test today and it was -ve. The midwife I spoke to said I should have had the vaginal swab though, and phoned the assessment unit to see if they'd do me one but they said no and that the urine culture should be enough. Still a bit unsure about the whole thing but the urine result has reassured me a bit at least.

katie good luck for tomorrow. Looking forward to hearing your news.

It wasn't helped by the fact that the Maternity ward was closed. The one I am going to has to close one day a week(watch it be the day I go into labour) due to staff shortages.

She was watched by some builders who were all cheering and making lewd comments.

Kayz that is terrible, have they told you what to do if you go into labour that day? i can't believe they close one day a week because of staff shortages, it's not like they area tube station!!!

bloody builders. they should have been doing something to help, not sure what but better than making comments.

sorry taht should have been are a tube station

LadyT I was in Tower Hamlets last time round we left hospital 6hrs after DS was born and then didnt see a amidwife until day 3 of being home then agaon only once before a cursory visitby the HV on day 10. Then I never saw a HV unless I went to clinic which I never bothered as I knew DS was healthy etc.

Oh and the tears they normally come in aroound 4 days post birth I remember crying all day lomng for no apparant reason you have to remember all those hormones crashing about inside of you.

Effie we have the P&T vibe and I love it. It is so much easier to push than our old quinny and I have tried the double decker variations on it several times with my 2 month old niece and 2 yr old niece so it has done all configurations. Tis fab for being out and about we have lots of country lanes round us so needed somkething narrow and its good for shops too. The only thing I would say against it is that the brake goes on far too easily and we have had 3 punctures so I would invest on some tube jelly for it, but to be fair I do tramp avross fields so its prob my own fault that its had the punctures.

Katie masses of luck for tom.

I know Veggie. I have to go to Scarborough which is about 30 minutes away. But in this weather it'll be 45 minutes. So I'll probably be giving birth in a layby too.

If they tell me they are closed I am tempted to say 'well send me a MW then. I am having him at home' But if they are short staffed then they wont be able to send me a MW.

Kayz I thought you were going to Malton? I only ask because I'm nosey; I had DD at Scarborough.

afternoon everyone, prepare for big birth story! Am sat with swaddled small person on a cushin on my lap and just overwhelmed by how amazing it is to think that barely 24 hours ago she was still in my tummy!

so as you saw, got woken up by contractions at about 3.30am yesterday. They pretty much stopped me getting back to sleep but sent DH off to work as we figured things would probably take a while to get going - plus I had lots to do including meeting SL for lunch! instead come about 9 they were about evey five mins - had a bath as per Maddie (doula's) suggestion, but they got closer and by 10 it was about every couple of minutes so phoned mw, maddie came over and DH came back from work (instead of going to his already postponed once diabetic annual review ). They felt like incredibly instense period pains, but just in the bottom of my womb, no back pain or anywhere else. But by the time everyone had arrived it was about a minute on, minute off - no real time to recover in between. Breathing through them, making lots of strange noises and holding a hot water bottle against my tum helped a bit but at the point when the MW said "We'll give you til 4 and if nothing's happening we'll review the situation" I thought there's no wy I could make it til 4. She didn't do any VE's as the birth plan had said to avoid it if they were happy with how the baby was coping, and I'm glad, I could barely stand up straight let alone think about lying down to be examined.

DH and MW rearranged the living room and got the pool inflated without me really noticing until they said did I want to get in? This was about noon I guess. Water felt lovely, helped a bit with dealing with the contractions as I could move around a lot more easily - most comfortable was on knees bent leaning over the side, plus this leant I could grab DH's hands or his waist really hard. About an hour later the feelings changed and there was a definite need to start pushing - MW said go with it. DH and Maddie both brilliant at this point - pouring water over my back, encouraging me to breathe it out (though there were lots more big groans and grunts) and I started on the entonox but probably a bit late - didn't have much of an effect as the pushes were getting so much more intense at the same
time.

After about an hour of pushing she started to get close to crowning, which was an amazing if rather terrifying time - they could see the head appearing and going back in, and each time I really felt as if she was trying to come out of my bum started to say things like "come on baby" and "out you come" which made everyone laugh. When her head finally came out it was amazing - pushing as hard as I could and then there she was, I felt the head under water and it was as if she was trying to float upwards against my body. Another big push and I felt the shoulders turn and the midwife brought her up to the surface. DH moved the cord to find out she was a girl, then I finally got to sit back in the pool with her on my chest.

We waited for the placenta to come out of its own accord which took a little while so DH held the baby skin to skin, while I got a massive scare - (WAAAAY TMI alert) some bits broke off and stuck to my ladygarden, I was trying to feel around the area before getting out of the water on MW instructions and thought "Shit, my entire labia has ripped off" but it was all fine in the end, just a minor graze.

So very glad we managed it at home - looking back if at any point someone had said "you need to get in an ambulance" I wouldn't have been able to do it, I could hardly get from the bathroom to the kitchen without another contraction coming on let alone get properly dressed and go along a road with lots of speed bumps Am now an absolute HB evangelist but also very very aware how lucky we were that everything went to plan and the baby was fine, thank God for keeping an eye on us throughout.

And well done to everyone who got to the end of that epic, will sned pics to the email list when we get a moment to upload them. I now see why everyone says motherhood is hard work, I didn't get a chance to have a wee until 4pm and life now revolves around an unnamed interloper!

I am having him at Malton. But they close one day a week so if I am unlucky I will have to go to Scarborough.

I am dreading it as Scarborough was horrible and I hated it there. Terrified of going back and the nurse who made me feel like crap will be there again. Be tempted to turn round and walk back out again.

Lets hope you hold on till the weather clears kayz. I cannot understand what you are meant to do if the unit it closed. Surely they can't turn you away if you are close to delivering?

effie Thanks so much for the address. I've emailed you.

ladyT Thanks for the further c-section details. I don't think they do the epidural afterwards at my hospital, well no one has mentioned anything. Someone told me they give paracetomol but that sometimes doesn't shift a headache! I hope it is something better than that.

Good luck for tomorrow katie.

I wonder how mibbes is getting on...

I've just taken some parkin out of the oven. The house smells lovely. I doubt I'm going to be doing this sort of thing when the baby arrives!

Kayz much sympathy - I have to be diplomatic as I know people who work there (in admin), and my sister is having her baby there in March. But, I'm 100% with you. You have to be militant in there - they treated me like s*. I was 19 when I had DD, and my experience there was 10 years ago, so I probably put up with things that I shouldn't have because of inexperience. If it's still similar, then get out as quickly as they will let you go! Hopefully you'll be all set for Malton.

Congratulations again JJ

I did that Abby I demanded to go home the same day.

Jolly They do just turn you away or ring an ambulance. They didn't check my friend just told her to go to Scarborough.

Oooooooooh congratulations Jump!!!!

jj, sounds amazing - thanks for posting. Homebirth sounds fantastic - I want one! Looking forward to the photos.

hey JJ thanks for that, for some reason i'm feeling a bit down this afternoon but that has really cheered me up sounds brilliant. I know DH will get back in time and all will be fine, i am really looking forward to it now. think i might even try out this birthpool tonight.

That is a lovely story JJ.

massive congrats jj and chutney. PD am sorry that both jj and I have deserted you..

Here's what happened to me...in a bit more detail. Self indulgent post but hey ho. Verso I am with you on being slightly shocked at how hard it is to BF a new born. They've got such tiny mouths (sorry - statement of the bleeding obvious).

So as you know my waters broke on Weds night but labour didn't start, so we turned up at St Thomas' on Friday morning. Couldn't go to the hippie bit as risk of infection meant they were going to have to induce. But we had lovely big room with en suite bathroom and massive windows and could stay there for the whole thing. Already huge improvement on EGA...

At about 1pm they examined me and said I was 2cm dilated so gave me the gel to see if it would help get things going a bit more - and put me on antibiotics so that there was no risk of her getting an infection whilst being born. Have to say this was massive relief as was pretty paranoid about infections after last time, and had got myself slightly worked up about strep b. At this point I suddenly remembered how much labour hurt - and was decidedly nervous about the whole thing. Had moment where I thought "maybe if I just don't do anything then it won't work and I don't have to do this" which was a bit stupid. Then nothing much happened - I walked around the hospital for a bit/bounced around on the ball - but not with much enthusiasm given trepidation. When they examined me again at 8ish I was still 2cm. So they started to talk about putting me on the drip. Which I was really anti given what people say about how much it hurts. They said they'd give me a bit longer though. Then consultant came round about 10 and said if I hadn't got any further in an hour or so they thought I should def have the drip. I took instant dislike to him - was in full scrubs with flunkies and wouldn't look at me - best line was "given we're committed to delivering your baby this is what we'll do" (WTF - 'given he was committed? i've started so i'll finish....'). Luckily midwife was fantastic - gave me longer than an hour and then talked me through the whole drip thing and how it makes labour different etc. but that it wasn't foregone conclusion that I'd need an epidural/lots of intervention. Thank God I believed her. By this stage I'd got my tens machine on and was feeling much more relaxed - had filled the room with aromatherapy oils and thought sod it we may as well get it over with.

So I sat/lay on the bed (no chance I was doing anything to make it any quicker) and about midnight she started me on the drip. Meant that I had the contraction and heart rate monitors on all the time. Which actually I didn't mind at all - something quite soothing about the sound of the heartbeat. And then things just built up gradually - looking back at the notes she just increased the amount of hormone very slowly - and contractions were manageable so that I just used tens machine (used it right this time and it was really effective) and could doze a bit between contractions. By about 3 they were getting a bit stronger so I did some breathing as well (hypnobirthing CD proved useful even though I'd only got round to listening to it a few times) - but still fine really. Then she examined me again at 4:15 and I was only 3 cms. Which explained why I'd not been finding it too tricky...was dreading thought that it was going to be hours and hours more.

Bit of a palaver while she checked with the consultant about whether it was a problem that it was all going slowly - he thought fine so DH went out of the room for 10 mins for some fresh air. The MW suggested I kneel up on the bed and lean over the back to see if it made a difference and I had the most almighty contraction. Honestly thought pain would kill me. So she turned down the drip - I begged her for gas and air and poor DH came back in to find a completely changed scene with me hanging over the end of the bed groaning. Then I thought I could feel the baby coming - which panicked me as I knew I'd only been a bit dilated and thought that MW wouldn't realise (she obviously did). DD was born about 3 contractions later at 5:15. No pushing from me - contractions and gravity just got her out. And no tearing at all. Was completely surreal - one minute to be thinking it was going to be ages and the next to be holding her. No transition phase to speak of - because it basically wasn't a natural labour - which I have to say for me was much better as that was low point last time.

All of which meant I felt great afterwards - and recovery had been really quick. So nice not to have any stitches. Think the fact it was quick and quite peaceful helped her too - so far she's pretty chilled out.She cried as she was being born and given she was grown almost entirely on coco pops is a good size at 6lbs 11 oz. I'd forgotten how tiny newborns are though. Because there was a risk of infection she and I stayed in hospital in private room for 36 hours afterwards. Although I wouldn't have planned it like that - and did miss Dh and DS - was really lovely just to get to know each other in peace and quiet.

DS is doing ok - he was so lovely with her when he saw her in hospital. I had put her in the cot so I could make a fuss of him and once he saw her he was so excited and gave her this beautiful grin. He keeps saying "it's a baby" with surprise when he sees her or hears her cry. He had a bit of a wobble yesterday and wanted to sit on my knee to have his lunch - but other than that has been fine. He spent today playing on his trike that the baby brought him. And I'm staying in bed - have done that much better this time and determined not to put proper clothes on for at least a week.

Thanks so much for all your lovely messages. I'll shut up now!

JJ lovely birth story - thanks for posting.

JB - parkin! You're taking me back to my youth in Sheffield. YUM!

Poisondwarf thanks for the website recommendation. I will definitely check it out. I am so determined to feed DD2 but I'd forgotten the early days can be a test of stamina!

LadyT I didn't get an epidural with my c/s, just the spinal - and then voltarol suppositories (oh the glamour) until the spinal wore off, then cocodamol and diclofenac (apart from one horrible six-hour period where I reminded them they'd forgotten my tablets and they insisted they hadn't! Bit sore - but nothing like what you experienced.)

katie I wasn't allowed to wear nail polish but no one said anything about other make up. I'm a bit pants when it comes to make up generally so it didn't bother me that much. My c/s took about an hour altogether - not including the prep time. About five/ten minutes for the birth (including suctioning out your waters) and then the rest for being sewn back up. It's very disconcerting, so DH and I had a very intense and silly conversation about West End theatre (not quite sure why we picked that subject!) so we had something to focus on. GOOD LUCK!

Back home! Yay! Bilirubin levels were 320 yesterday and back down to 243 today after the phototherapy. Been advised to watch out for lethargy again - cue me being paranoid as DD2 is currently sleeping (oh btw I'm going to start using DD1 and DD2 again because I've picked such unusual names it's possible I could be 'outed' on here!).

Really good to be home. Just read DD1 her bedtime story and overheard her on the monitor just now explaining to her cuddly toy that she has a new sister. >heart

Awww Verso That is so cute about DD1 telling her toy about DD2.
Glad you are back at home again.

Katie best of luck for tomorrow! Another baby - how exciting. They are coming thick and fast!! Take care and see you on the other side.

Jump that is an amazing homebirth story - especially given it was your first baby you did a fabulous job! Enjoy all those cuddles with your lovely girl.

LAL wow what an amazing birth story. No stitches - put me down for that please. So glad your recovery has been so good and that your DS is enjoying beinga big bro.

Kayz hope you are feeling more positive. As Beans I think said it does seem a shame to not try and enjoy these last few days with your DS - and s*d those who keep pestering you with texts. The hypnobirthing thing is very big into not getting hung up on our due dates - they call them "guess dates" which I think is a much more appropriate way to look at it! But you know you will have your baby by the end of the month which will be fabulous! Hope you get some more rest tonight, its tough I know.

ladyT good to hear from you. Your antenatal care does sound a bit patchy I must say. There seems a massive variation as others have said. In Haringey we get a visit first or second day out of hospital and thereafter every couple of days til you are discharged (which for me is always AGES because I can't get my babes to regain their birth weight). Your pub lunch sounds great.

verso delighted you are home! Yay for Frieda.

wow - am loving these birth stories! Thank you for posting them! Niggly lower pelvic pain for me tonight, but nothing new there - will settle down with Malteasers and wait for it to stop - as it always does!