Due March 2009 - 3rd thread - Aches, cravings and... is that a bump I see?!

[auntyspan]

Brand new thread ladies!

Slickbird, i'm the same 19wks today but look about 8mths. I think 3rd time around your stomach muscle think 'oh sod it' .

Boobz (i'm trying to ignore that image) it could be stretching.

Boobz, i think that kind of squirming, wringing feeling is movement. Stretching (in my world) is an 'OUCH!' pain, baby is a squirm and occasional tickle (kick from v. tiny leg).

LaWeasel - yep, that sounds like cramp to me. Keep hydrated, but that's about all you can do (we need a regretful face here...)

My belly wobbles up and down with my pulse. How's that for rubbish tummy muscles (and a layer of flab) But I can tell when the baby has decided to go all the way over to one side or the other - I am very lop sided

Oh boo. I have been hideously unhydrated because I'm quite frequently sick after drinking water (not enough for me to need to be in hospital on a drip but enough that I know I should be drinking more), so I think I'm stuck with the evil cramps!

DC has stopped shoving himself all into the left hand side and doing the deeply left sided bump for the moment, but he had a week where he just would not move from that side!

How far gone are you weasel?

Please add me! I'm due 28 March. Love this thread. I'll deffo log on when i get home and can read/comment without looking over my shoulder Thanks

17 weeks. I know. Still with the sickness, but I did start at 2 weeks. I have a feeling I'm just going to have it the whole way through the way some people do.

17 weeks and you can tell which side your dc is on? I'm not getting this at all. I just feel fat.

Oh! Don't worry about it. I'm really really tiny, and when I didn't have much of a bump I could feel the dc and see which side he was on because if I looked down my belly was lopsided. Now I have more bumpy bump and am less sick so it's more food and less belly I can't see which side he's on, or seem to be able to feel as much...

Hi Boobz, I haven't got a huge bump but when i wake up in the morning and I lie flat, I can feel DC clearly (I think its cos my full bladder pushes the womb up) and sometimes DC is to one side!

Ah girls, just read the latest posts from the past few days and wanted to say thank you for making me LOL. Emma2617, nearly wet myself at my desk reading your post from yesterday (p19)
Had a really sh*tty depressing morning as looking at possible redundancy (and therefore no mat pay) in Jan next year and I am the main earner in the family, not a huge deal in the grand scheme of things but the hormones got the better of me and I had a tearful 5 minutes (well, ok, 30 minutes!) at lunch time.
Feel better for a good cry on DH's shoulder (and a big lunch and half a bounty and half a twix)
So nice to read what everyone's been up to - congrats to all those with good news and chin up to all those having a tearful 5 minutes, it will pass!

Hey all!
Not been on in a few days had a really sad few days one of dd1s little friends passed away after a terrible accident so I have been constantly out and about keeping her busy but she has been an absolute star so brave, I'm amazed at how well children cope as opposed to adults.
Any way on a much cheerier note I have dd2s birthday party on friday I am hot organised at all! Heed to get my finger out!
This bump seems different to my other pregnancies but seems to be all in my right hand side I am 16+3 can only feel movements every now and again usually in bed when I am concentrating on it!
L xx

AmyO I think I would have been crying even without the pregnancy hormones in your position!! I am just a big jessie though!!

lollipopz sorry to hear about DDs friend...It's so hard when someone that young leaves us. But yes, I have to agree at the resilience of children...it is something to be admired.
I can only feel movements when I not concentrating on it! As soon as I think "ooh, was that baby" and I start concentrating...nothing happens!!

65 hours until scan...I am so excited! I am running a constant countdown on Facebook...y friends must be getting mighty irritated by now!!!

May I have a small rant? Well, not so much a rant as a "getting whacked in the face by reality" moment...

I spent much of last week on my phone between meetings trying to find a day care that would have room for Cletus the Fetus as of SEPTEMBER 2009.

I had to call 40 day cares to get a pool of FIVE possibles that we're visiting this week and next.

Was I just way too naive in thinking that there would be more choice with an 11-month lead time? Oy vey.

We've seen two so far, and I'm curious to see what the other three will be like; I am a complete novice at this baby stuff, so didn't really have any expectations going into the visits...but was still surprised at the very different feel between the two and (unpleasantly) the child/caregiver ratio in both. Belgian law specifies a maximum ratio of 8 to 1, which seems just unmanageable to me and I hate the thought of my kid getting lost in the crowd but I don't really have any choice unless I find a private nanny, which costs the earth.

Selfishly, what this experience is making me feel more than anything at the moment is just how completely my current carefree, unregulated-by-pretty-much-anything-but-what-I-want life is going to change! Holidays ruled by the closing dates of the day care, scrambling to figure out who will drop off and who will pick up Cletus, etc. etc. Call me shallow, but it's taking me a bit of time to really absorb. Eeeeek.

What are other people doing for child care?

corgi I am having similar issues!! We were going to have DPs mum look after bambino monday and tuesday, nursery wednesday and his mum again thursaday and friday...but we are having serious problems with DPs mum at the moment...her husband (DPs stepdad) who drinks to excess is trying to cut her off from the family and despite us offering to visit her, pick her up to visit her other grandkids etc she wont. Long story!! So now we are potentially looking at full time nursery place which is £630 a month!! 54% of my salary!! We are in a serious dilemma as it would only just make going back to work beneficial!

Fortunately the nursery near my work has just had an extension so has lot of places at the moment, and I wouldnt be looking for a place until Jan 2010 so Im hoping all will be okay!

It is a minefield though! And an 8:1 ratio does sound a little rough though!

Corgi, I bet you that by the time you emerge from the new-baby fog, the restrictions of day care won't feature in your thoughts, just the freedom of being able to hand over for a few hours! (or is that just me)?

An 8:1 ratio sounds steep though, and I'm amazed how few places could help you with such a decent notice period. I hope you find one you really like.

emma, I can't believe how expensive nurseries are in the UK! I am suddenly feeling much better about the +/- 500 euros per month fulltime care runs over here.

Pity about your mother-in-law -- I hope the situation changes so you can still keep that option open. I am suddenly feeling as NEVER before the distance between me and my family members (about 5000 miles). I've been perfectly happy having them on another continent, but it would certainly make babysitting easier to have them here!

I have 6 months maternity and am taking another month off on top of that so won't need child care until Sept 2009 like you Corgi. I work from home, so am wondering what options are available to me. Can I get a nanny that comes from 10 - 4 every day so I can get a decent work day in and only pop to where the baby is when i need to breast feed? Or will it be distracting to have the baby in the house and therefore if I really am going to work properly from home, I need to put it in a nursery? And how much would a nanny from 10-4 cost vs a nursery? And can I expect the nanny to do cleaning and washing etc while I am working? Will I just come and so "no no, I clean it THIS way" and therefore will actually get nothing done anyway?

Does anyone else here work from home? What have you done when you have "gone back" to work with a 6 month old baby after maternity leave?

??

Sorry can't help with cost of childcare as all i know is that i/we cannot afford for me to go back work with 2 in fulltime childcare and 1 part time. As it would be over £1000 per month.

I just come on to moan realy. Why is it when ever i'm pregnant one of my relatives become seriously ill.

When pg with dd1 my very lovely nanny was dx with emphasaema and then she died when dd1 was 18mths very .

When pg with dd2 my dad was dx with abestoes and given 18mths (touch wood his condition is still about the same) to live . This was about 2yrs ago.

And now this time my very lovely grandad is seriously ill in hospital.

Lizzie, that's rubbish. I hope he pulls through, and at least he might enjoy the fact that there is another mini-you on the way whilst he is feeling so terrible.

I have vaguely formed plans that Grumpalump will go to a childminders near my house in the morning, I then have a long break of 4 hours in which I will pick them up spend some time with them and put them in nursery down the road from my work in the afternoon. But you have reminded me, that I need to get on with that as it's a very popular nursery and god knows it may well be booked already!! (very much hope not!) Because DP will be a student again then we will get help with childcare costs. But being realistic - if we weren't getting the help it wouldn't be worth me working, and once we've done the math it might still turn out to be pointless. How daft is that?

Since I enjoy my job and presumably will also enjoy spending time with grumpy... I'm just going to try and stay as flexible as I can about my plans.

Sorry so many of you are having a crap time or have had bad news.

I had left my job after my maternity leave with DD2 in March as my last employer treated me really really badly. Then I discovered we were not going to get enough help from children's tax credit, despite my 'new income' being a big fat ZERO - they base your earnings on the PREVIOUS YEAR!!! AAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHH! So stupid!!!! (And breathe......) So I had to find a job and ended up traveling every day for a part time job and it literally costs me 450 pounds to GO to work part time for child care, petrol and rail. And that cost includes my mum having DD2 two days a week. It's really pants. And now with another one on the way, I can't afford to put two into child care, full time or otherwise so DH is trying to find a better paid job (in this climate!!) and I may have to go work a Sunday or something. Of course, CTCredit don't take into account the cost of mortgages or fuel etc so the whole thing is a constant struggle and a juggling act. Although I have heard that CT Cred does increase by quite a bit if you have 3 kids. But it's not the point, I don't want to rely on the state, but you feel you should be able to have children and bloody well look after them! It's insane!!!!!!!

And relax..... Sorry, rant over. I told you those hormones had kicked in...

Hi all just popping in for a minute as I am exhausted was at the emergency room with Cruz last night as he had something happen to his hand ( I don't know because I was at work)So I went from work right to the hospital.Poor little guy was screaming something fierce and the worst was when he had to have x-rays done because I couldn't go in with him (given my current "condition"). I sat outside and listened to him scream while the nurses held him. Poor little man was so brave. They don't know what it is because the x-rays were clear so we are going to an orthopedist on Friday. I'm exhausted because today is dh's birthday and I've been cooking, and cleaning not to mention took Mateo to the dentist for the first time today.

I just want to crash, but nooo I'm looking at about another 5 hours to my day.

Oh no. Cant believe what an awful time everyone seems to be having. Luckily I have a part time evening and weekend job so start work as normal people finish meaning that DS1's daddy can look after him and when DC2 arrives its daddy can also do the looking after.

The last 2 days at work I have been able to smell the perfume/aftershave of every person who walked in (or lack of!) It makes me want to heave. Had no heightened sense of smell with ds so hoping this one is a girl.

To the movement question, I suspect 'wringing' feeling is a movement. My LO has hardly stopped moving today, must be missing daddy!

BIB I am suspecting movement too!! I keep getting the same wriggling sensation quite regularly now (well...at least twice a day!) Cant wait for scan to confirm if it is definately bambino!

Corgi I too couldnt believe how expensive it was...was expecting about £500, but £630 is ridiculous! I may have to look at childminder and see how that works out!

Hope everyone is well this morning...my cold is progressing well! Made myself sick my coughing up some lovely stuff

Over £1,000 for full time care where I live (S. London). Ouch.

Emma

Childminders charge anywhere from £3.50 to £5 per hour then you have to provide nappies/milk and then they charge extra if you want them to provide dinner/snacks once weaned.