Due November 2008: "Now, where is my uterus?...Just above the hair!! "

[Heartmum2Jamie]

Our shiny new thread!!

Heartmum2Jamie - 1 of my friends who has 3 kids had the same problem with her youngest as your best friend.

2 be honest I think the sleeping in the bed and at the side of the bed opening onto the bed was purely for her own motivations not anything to do with the baby. It has come back and bitten her in the bum in more ways than just eventually getting him out of her and her DH bed.

It also put a great strain on their relationship. Which I think is unnecessary when it wasn't benefiting the baby in anyway. Just easier for her and her own emotional reasons.

Hi everyone. There has been loads of chat since I was last on here. I have had a quick scan through, but I'm finding it difficult to keep up.

I notice I haven't been added to the due date list. Is one person doing the list or do I need to add myself? My EDD is 25th November.

On the subject of baby sleeping arrangements, I put my baby in her own room at 4 months old. As somebody else said, I thought perhaps we were waking her. However, moving her made no difference to her waking for feed times. We wouldn't have baby sleeping in our bed. I would be too afraid to sleep. I used to bring baby in bed to feed her in the night and then put her back in her crib. But then I would wake up having nightmares that I had fallen asleep whilst feeding her and now she was trapped somewhere under the duvet.

Hi all. I use a gliding crib for my babies- it lasts a lot longer than a moses basket, so our babies were in our room for around 7 months.

I have co-slept with my babies, there are useful information leaflets about safe co-sleeping available at most antenatal centres, I think they are made by the WHO. One of the most amazing things I discovered when breastfeeding is how you automatically sleep curled around your baby and do not move- not one inch!

Weather was fab today, wasn't it? DS and I have planted the raised borders in the back yard and it all looks very pretty. I'm shattered!

Anyone else still being sick at whatever weeks it is, or is it just me?

oh don't talk to me about bump size... if i had any kind of technical ability whatsoever i would post a photo to show you all that at 19 weeks my bump is truly enormous. i can't believe that i have another 21 weeks of serious growing to do. i put on 4 stone with ds which was an almighty bugger to get off but i seem to be headed that way again

as for co-sleeping... my ds was an extremely unsettled baby, he suffered from very bad reflux, only ever slept upright and even then only ever for very short spells. so he slept in with us for 16 months (first moses basket then cot) i was utterly paranoid about cot death so most of the time he would sleep on dh or i whilst we sat up in bed or in a sling in the day. so i guess you could call me an accidental attachment devotee...it was an extremely tough first year so we just stumbled through it, doing what we could to ease our baby's distress and catch little sleep ourselves and, to be honest, it was quite wonderful for bonding etc to experience that (although i fully appreciate not for everyone!)

I truly believe that there is no right or wrong way to do it, it is just about finding what is right for you and your baby... and actually, for me, one of the worst bits about becoming a new mum was all the conflicting and extremely confusing advice from friends/family/books etc...used to drive me scatty, and it was only when i found enough confidence in myself as a mother and could stop being befuddled by all the 'advice' that i started to enjoy being a mum.

oh i appear to have lost myself in an unintended rant! sorry! hope i haven't upset anyone with this i just believe so strongly in mothers trusting their own instincts.

I agree with you Zonedout. Everybody has got an opinion on everything, but you have to find out what is the best way for you and your baby. With my first baby I have always worried about doing things the right way. She is 6 months old now and I just do what seems best for us. I think with the new baby I will be much more relaxed.

Oh god no zoned out I think you are right.

As an adult I've been making informed decisions about what I want to do and have not changed since I had children, why should I?

My parents have always told me I have no opinions of any merit and I have had to learn to ignore them. It is very hard, but I would have zero self-esteem if I didn't.

Pinkyminky, that is very but good for you to let it wash over you as much as possible.

LouiseSJ, oh you have broght back memories! i used to have that exact same nightmare most nights. i remember waking up and actually searching the bedclothes for my ds in a cold sweat. Horrid.

Hi all. So much to catch up...

Heartmum, glad you made a decision you are happy with - it is your birthday after all! The hotel trip sounds very nice...

Doctorswife, your SIL sounds weird. I thought mine was bad, but most stuff is only said behind my back and isn't in that league at all. Hope she 'gets over herself' and apologises.

Buggies...I am still using my secondhand ebay M & P Pliko for ds (occasionally if it is a long walk). It's in a bit of a state and I was wondering if I could indulge in a new one for the new baby, but not it's two, I'll HAVE to have a new pushchair! I'd recommend one that can stand on its own when folded and as light as possible for lugging in and out of boot of car...nothing too heavy and fancy or you end up buying another stroller a couple of months down the line.

Sleeping...I say each to their own. Ds slept with me for a couple of months (just the best for feeding whilst lying down/ sleeping and aldo so snuggly) and then moved into our double bed. Dh was gutted when we put him in his own room at 7 months. I think ds was less traumatised! Ds was quite big and robust though so I never felt scared of squishing him. It's amazing how you just don't roll on top of them! If twins are little and fragile, I will probably feel less secure and also we only have a double bed so not really room for two. Plus may need to be a bit stricter with getting into some kind of routine before 1 yr old which was when ds decided he didn't need to wake up 4x per night! I won't have that luxury again. He was my little pfb, and for those of you having them, I suggest you enjoy it to the MAXIMUM. I really don't believe you can 'spoil' a little baby. But hey, don't listen to me, my ds was not a good sleeper! (he's fine now though).

All the 20 wk scans are very, very exciting. The predictions thread will need to be updated with 'reality' or 'likely reality' for those finding out and willing to share...I'm so excited to find out mine and everyone else's. Got another month to go as well, 9th July.

Been on mumsnet reviews 4 buggies and had a look at the petite star zia which got a 9.1 grading! Really like it and it isn't too expensive. On kiddicare.com there are also tons of good reviews 4 it. Supposed to be better than the zapp which 2 b honest out of the 2 is what I had heard of the most. I might have found the one! YIPPEE.

Thanks Zonedout. It is a bit sad, but you can't choose your parents but you can choose not to make their mistakes- I fully intend to make my own, thankyou very much!

MM yes if anyone has the excuse of needing a new buggy it's you. I have a few friends with multiples and they swear by the mountain buggy- definitely not compact when folded but very durable and easy to push. MY friend breastfed her twins and co-slept some of the time but I think DH had to use the spare room!

Blimey I opened a bit of a box there didn't I?
I think I will just see how it all goes. As I said, I am not going to be a very strong attachment parent, because I feel both mum and baby need their own space. DD was in with us (in a crib) for nearly 9 months, I think, DH thought we would get to 6 months and out she went, but I wasn't ready. I was still up and down at least twice a night to retrieve a dummy until she was over a year anyway. This one will have a combination of co sleeping and crib but I won't stress or worry the way I did with DD, if she wouldn't settle. If this one doesn't, fine, sleep with me. If they are happy, back in their crib they go. And DD is such a good sleeper I think I will have to keep this one in our room longer than she was so as not to disturb her.
Will just have to play it all by ear I guess.

I think it is important to make your own decisons and mistakes as how else can you learn as a parent. At 1st with DS I had so many people trying to "help" that it made my head spin and at times made me feel inadequate. Every child is different so you need to learn about your child and their needs and find the best solution not try and apply "standard" advice. Although there is nothing wrong with deciding which bits you think are applicable and using them.

Ohh listen to me mother of the year . To be honest with DS me and DH found the most part of 1st 6 weeks hell. It was just a learning curve until we learnt DS and his needs and how to cater to them. I was also emotional after DS didn't take to breast feeding. Although I'm now glad he didn't and he's fine from being bottle fed. BUMP is definately going to be bottle fed.

We now have a better by far behaved and independant but very affectionate child who has been in a routine (which has varied with age) since aprpox 3 months than a lot of the people who were advising. 1 of the advisor's, my friend and her DH, comment about how great DH is everytime they see him which is often and her DH says "why arent our kids like that".

Buggies ... So far narrowed down the list but need to actually view them in a shop.

• Micralite Fastfold
• Petite Star Zia
• M&P Luna

Anyone got any opinions of any of the buggies listed. Pro's and Con's for baby and toddler.

Hi guys. So many posts.
Autumn welcome back, glad you had a good holiday.
Dozymare LOL at the trouser-less you. I have been in my bikini at home, I couldn't 'bare' to have any clothes on at all.
Doctorswife, so sorry to hear about your evil SIL. What an awful thing to say.
Heartmum so soory about cncert. But if you weren't happy with the childcare arrangements, you never would have enjoyed it anyway.
Misdee, Vbab and Mrs Mattie, sorry when I addded the stats detail, I didn't explain very well. You have to adjust the actual stats thread itself, rather than the detail on this thread :
stats

I need help finding a buggy travel system. I think Misdee is the woman for me, to help with this dilema
I like travel systems. I had a M&P one before. I liked it because i mainly put an asleep ds from the car seat into the house, or put the car seat onto the pram ( ds normally asleep for this aswell !!)and then used it for a vey quick food shopping trip,
rather than using the pram to go hiking for hours.
But I have a YARIS, which is reknown for having the tiniest boot of all. So I needan umbrella folding one.
Any suggestions, PLEASE ?

Heartmum, I'm glad you have sorted out your tickets. A weekend away sounds fab.

Moses baskets - I've seen some lovely ones in John Lewis that are actual wicker so seem a lot more solid, but I think they have less room inside so am not sure. Does anyone know what I mean?

Also, I know I'm coming into the buggy conversation a bit late but we've just ordered a bugaboo bee and I'm v excited about it. DH loves it too which is important, in fact it was him who was keen to buy it so soon! We live in London so I'm hoping it will be practical as it's pretty compact.

OH MY GOD I'M HAVING A BABY YIPPEE !!

Hi all.
I've not been around for a while. Husband pretty ill. So been backwards and forwards to hospital. He's at last starting to make progress towards being well again. Been terrible time. But glad I've been pregnant - kept me focused on positive future, especially when I started feeling kicks last week. Am planning to try and take some time out for me soon - I feel quite knackered,maybe Tuscany but will have to see how DH goes. I feel very lardy, haven't got the tidy bump of previous pregnancies and feel my whole body swelling. But hope now DH getting better I may be able to do some exercise.

What's the gossip here? Recap anyone?

Pinkali37 - Really happy 4 u. Guess what ... I am too.

Renaissancewoman - Sorry to hear your DH has been ill. ? But at least he is getting better. Just try and remember to look after yourself and your bump also. Have you got other children?

Afternoon all, ive traipsed around local precinct (complete dive) looking for a birthday present for a friend, instead i ended up buying books for the baby (WTF?!) ive come home, read 'guess how much i love you' to my bump and bawled my head off. needless to say books have now gone away!

I think as a book lover, i got a bit over zealous at encouraging reading!

Thanks for encouragement about SIl, she hasnt apologised to me and ive told DH that he cant spend time with her but i wont be, i cant forgive those comments at all, although i will be civil if i see her.

Ive been toying with sleeping arrangements, i saw a co-sleeper travel cot which is 200 quid here but 200 dollars in the states. but then its the same as a travel cot but with a drop side. i think im going for moses basket, then possible travel cot then its own room. Already ordered pram at the baby show so thats sorted, im trying to research what cot i want now!

Renaissancewoman, Sorry your DH has been so unwell, but am pleased to hear that he is on the road to recovery. Take care of yourself and bump!

OMG we're all having babies...

I like the idea of a cot with a side that comes down to the side of the bed sounds nice but also a good idea especially if end up having a caesarean.

My DS was in his moses basket for 3 months due to his size and it seemed a little pointless. But I suppose I will get to use it for this 1. I just got the moses basket at the time never thinking there were other options.

sorry about your DH being ill Renaissance, and glad to hear that you finally believe there is a baby in their pinkali

meant to write above that DH CAN see sister not cant, im not stooping to her level. they can all carry on without me, ive got my own friends and family and mumsnet of course.

Dr's wife, your due the same day as me so i'm intrigued to know how big your bump is. Have you posted a pic yet? If i breath in the actual bump is quite low but getting bigger. When is your 20 week scan? I have mine on 25th June.

Sorry that should have been You're due... not your.... sorry