Due Sept '08: We're halfway there part 2....

[LittleConnie]

Come on over!

jearund - I'm the same with tiredness - one minute I think I'm doing ok, the next day I'm absolutely done in. My 35 minute cycle ride took me 50 minutes on Thursday because I just had NO energy. And I'm often in bed at 8.30 or 9pm still. Plus I have a lie in at the weekend. Last night it was 9pm to bed and 8.30am to rise and I still craved an afternoon nap.

Can't answer your boy question though - being mum to two girls. I won't know where to start if this one turns out to be a boy!!

Hi Jearund my ds is 3.8 years and I have Never pulled his foreskin back to clean under it. It has never been infected either. Not sure what the official advice is, but its never been an issue really. Now he is older he pulls it back himself sometimes when he is in the bath. Hope that helps. Kisk I live just outside York .
Well I have been to look at the bug again today. I am defo going for a charcoal base with all the navy trimmings so excited. I decided not to order it yet as I am a little superstitious with these things. We also got a big boys car seat for ds and let him choose a little rattle for euan.
We then went to toys r us and got a massive bouncy castle for ds, but its too wet to put up today.
Chat soon x

Oh and yes I too get tired so easily despite having at least 10 hours at night.

Jearound It was me. It has got a bit better. I am in my 24 week now, but I did notice around week 21 this constant feeling of " I can't cope"
My ds has been ill with a cold waking up very early ( 4:00 )and My dh is away so it is non stop. Now I now I can cope with a baby, because I have done it once, I can't wait for her to be born. I need my strenth to look after a 3yr old. Let's hope Lorea does not suffer from colic.
I am buying the swaddle from grobag to make sure she sleeps well and does not wake up everytime she has the moro reflex,like my ds.
I also plan to carry her in the sling most of the time. She won't be a 10lb baby coming a week early with the C-section, I hope.
I miss you in the other thread. Time to show off your other language!

They told me at the hospital NEVER to pull my ds foreskin.

Have just caught up on the posts. Re the girl friends/ boy friends thing: well I used to get on better with boys until I went to university and then I made a really good girl friend and since then most of my close friends have been women, partly because there's no undercurrent like there is with men (the sexual attraction issue). Starlight I am one of those people who likes to compliment other women if they are wearing a pretty blouse or whatever - or even if they've done something well. I do it because it builds people up whereas it's so easy to be negative and critical. But I'm not false - I only give a compliment if I genuinely mean it, otherwise I say nothing! Oh, and all that's expected back is 'thank you' - you don't have to give a compliment back!

Potxola your post struck a chord with me as I think it did with many others. I think it's a shame we live so far apart as I think we'd get on in RL (plus I'd be able to practice my Spanish!!). Spanish people are more open than a lot of the English (which is one of the things that first made me fall in love with Spain). Like you I like to get past small-talk and onto things that matter as it's much more satisfying and rewarding. I'm quite nosy and I often deliberately ask deeper questions to see how people will react - sometimes they will then open up and we'll have a great conversation, but other times I get rebuffed! However often the small talk is necessary to get to know people and break down barriers. Like someone (charitygirl?) said, there is room for both, however. When I joined my NCT group I was hoping to find a soulmate among the group and was a bit disappointed when that didn't happen. However they are all really nice girls and it's a very un-bitchy group. It's nice to meet up with them and chat about the babies as it's the main thing we have in common. We do sometimes touch deeper stuff but there's very little soul-baring. However I have my old friends for that, who don't usually want to talk about babies all the time anyway! I feel for you, because it's always especially hard in a foreign country, especially one where people are more reserved than you are used to (I speak from experience after a year in Austria as a student!). Don't write us all off though - a lot of English people are willing to open up, it just takes a bit longer than with Spanish people (in my experience). Maybe you just haven't met the right people yet.

Potxola forgot to say: as for being worried about being a good mum to Lorea, I feel those same worries about having a boy! I desperately wanted a girl the first time and was so happy that I had one. I had memories of playing with Sindy Dolls etc when I was little and wanted to share all that with my daughter. But I haven't a clue what you do with boys. My brothers are 14 years older than me so I effectively grew up an only child. I am hoping that you just learn on the job! And as someone else has already said, I think you'll be a great mum to her - you will talk to her about things that matter and you'll probably develop a really strong bond.

jearund official advice now is not to pull back the foreskin, we've never cleaned under DS's and he's fine. Although i challenge you to keep a straight face when he discovers his willy at 6 months-ish and starts playing with it and giggling while you change his nappy. DS does it and I have to try and keep a calm expression and not to snort with laughter . I can't stop him in case I give him a complex, but equally I don't want to make him think it's the best party trick in the world !

My back is getting really tight if I've stood up / sat down for too long. I seem to need an equal balance of each to stop it aching. Apparently I am getting a lie in tomorrow, according to DP.

I have been moping about all day thinking what I could really do with is a weekend of sleep, wine, sex and sunshine. That would be just what the doctor ordered!

I'm soooo tired too. I was just starting to 'bloom', or at least not be comatosed all day, and then last weekend dd started waking at 5:30am. Even though we ignore her as she burbles on and off for over an hour, it still keeps us awake. This morning she gave us a bit of a break and didn't wake til 6:10, which means I got 7 hours straight sleep (was so tired I don't think I even had my 3am loo stop!) but I almost feel worse for it. Tonight we've tried two new tricks 1)put her in a disposable, coz even with boosters her power wees have started soaking through her washable nappies 2)I've sold my soul and bought the cow and gate 'night time' formula and given her that instead of cows milk. I don't think she is waking from hunger, but I'm not taking any chances! But of course if she sleeps longer then we won't know which one helped, but hey ho.

potxola I've never tried the swaddle bags, but dd had a very strong moro reflex - we would watch her sometimes fling her arms out and wake herself up. We swaddled her in soft jersey cotton blankets - more of a thick sheet really. They have to be cotton and have a bit of stretch. We used to swaddle her really tightly but it worked a treat and I can say it genuinely changed our lives! What are the swaddle bags like? I'd be interested to know how tightly they pin the arms down!

I've just uploaded a photo from our 20wk scan onto my profile page. Anyone else think they can see boy bits?! I'm fairly sure its just the umbilical cord, but its fun to speculate!
I also put up a photo of dd, totally indulgent I know!

Gosh. Feel a bit fed up reading everyone's trials at making mummy chums, as I will have to do it all over again, kind of assumed it would fall into place again. Wish I wasn't moving away from mine . I guess I am just lucky to have found a lovely grounded bunch in Notting Hill of all places.
carrieon that looks like a boy to me hun, absolutely!! Although I cannot enlarge the picture so am having to squint a bit at it, it looks like boy bits for sure!

carrieon--
beautiful daughter! as far as the picture being a boy... i can't tell because i cant look at it closely...but you guys seem to know what your talking about.

jearund- no clue on the foreskin thing,but i have to have him circumcised within a week...should i clean it before the procedure? i don't want to look like a bad mom if it's all gunky....quite honestly i've never even seen an un circumcised penis so i'm not sure what i'm getting myself into when it's going to come to my newborn.

I thought the rule was on the 8th day? ( at my recent knowledge of Jewish faith acquired from Desperate Housewives...)

Jearund I had to have a second scan because my 20 week scan showed that the stomach measurement was on the low side of ok, and also the femur didn't even make it onto the graph I don't think. Anyway, had my second scan on Fri and she's gone from a small baby near to the 3rd percentile for stomach to near the top of the graph!! The sonographer said 'blimey, she (the baby) hasn't half had a growth spurt this month' and my partner said 'you're not kidding, we've seen it, she (me) literally grows infront of our eyes!' So yes, growth spurts definitely happen between 20-24 weeks, I am now pretty damn huge whereas at 20 weeks you could barely tell at all.

Today I did a bit more gardening, I dug up or front garden's flower bed, it took about an hour and a half and I've been shattered ever since! I then went to Ikea and got a chair for the nursery, it looks brilliant! I very nearly cried when I was assembling it though. Unfortunately I made it and then realised I had completely missed off the bit that makes the seat tight, so when I sat on it my bum slipped right through! I finally found the part underneath the wardrobe so had to undo all of my hard work to start again!

Anyway my partner came and did it in the end, and I nearly cried because he was doing it, and so far I haven't made any of the furniture or decorated the nursery, I always start and then someone takes it off me. I actually know it my heart I am being totally unreasonable thinking that, if I wasn't pregnant I wouldn't give a monkeys because they are only helping me!

For some reason it is issues with the nursery that always make me cry! I cried two weeks ago because the coat hooks thing we bought wasn't screwed onto the door straight!! My partner fixed it in about 3 seconds but I was already blubbing by then!

Carrieon love your pics. I reckon its a boy .
Glad your scan went well lolli. You seem really organised with your nursery. I am going to focus on mine as soon as mat leave starts. . I am so excited.
My next door neighbour is due anyday. I dont really know her as we live in a new development and she has always worked alot. However, I am going to be the best neighbour possible now.
Its all sunny now. Maybe we will get the bouncy castle out !

Starlight jearound Thanks for the tips. I love this country after almost 20 years and I am sure it is a matter of time and being myself with people.
"Carrieon" the best selling swaddle in the market is the Grobag. I am buying it this week.It uses velcro and it is very safe.

www.bumpto3.com/product.aspx?DISPLAYCAT=sleep&CAT=Products&CATGRY=Bodysuits&PID=AG102

My life changed with at 8 months my ds sleept in a grobag sleeping bag, so I am buying the 0-6 month for Lorea.

Carrieon Honestly buy a swaddle,it is easier that using a sheet.And they are beautiful

slinki,

I'm not Jewish. I have Jewish family, but my husband and I aren't...the circumcision is being done simply because in both our families every boy gets circumcised. i'll probably hold a brunch type thing to announce the name after the circumcision to compromise with all sides of the family. (we have such a complicated family tree)!

Carrieon your daughter is cute! Great scan picture, mine was rubbish! I agree the big thing looks like a leg (it's huge) but can't tell about the boy bits.

Lollipopmother I'm feeling reassured after your post as like you I barely looked pregnant a couple of weeks ago and suddenly the bump seems bigger every day. That would make sense then (as long as it doesn't continue at that rate!).

Starlight I can completely picture those horrible bullies - I too remember people making coments at school that you never knew whether were genuine or sarcastic. I think I just used to presume they were genuine as it was easier to deal with (and they might have been!). We had a uniform at school but I remember on the rare occaions we were out of uniform I never really knew what to wear as I wasn't one of the "in crowd" (nor particularly wanted to be!). I think now we are all grown up though that anyone who plays games like that (pretend compliments) is very immature, bitchy and not worth knowing. I would think anyone who knows me would know I am a genuine person but I can totally see where your discomfort comes from!

Talking of bullies, I liked EandZ's approach. I did a similar thing when I was at school and 2 girl bullies pinned me up against a wall. I bit one of them! I got into trouble with the headmistress for that but they left me alone after that!

jearund,
i'm glad your a biter. i hope my kids can bite if their in situations like that. i think the phrase 'you've got a biter' is one of the funniest phrases a parent can hear.

i never got in trouble at school for pinching bullies in their armpit fat...i think it's because i used to cry while doing it (i was soo afraid of hurting people)...and my nails were always long so sometimes i'd leave marks/a little blood...but i never got in trouble. (thank goodness).