April 2023 - We’re nearly half way! ✨ 🍼

[Cuppasoupmonster]

New thread! Hopefully this one will see us through 20 week scans and crossing the halfway point! 💕

As ever if you’re missing from the list give me a shout and I will add you:

Cuppasoupmonster second baby 7th (induction 37w) 💖
Milkandfenty third baby 1st 💛
Searchingtheskies second baby 2nd 💛
Biscuitsplease first baby 2nd 💖
Chocolat first baby 3rd 💛
Bluebubbles12 second baby 4th 💛
Erber third baby 4th 💛
CariadBB first baby 5th 💛
Skylark1990 second baby 7th 💛
Melissa2023 first baby 8th 💙
Tubbytele second baby 14th (CS 39w) 💛
Alwaysseeingstars first baby 9th 💛
Lj2022 first baby 10th 💖
Emeal123 second baby 11th 💙
DBS94 first baby 11th 💙
tattlytote second baby 12th 💛
Bernesemum first baby 12th 💛
Lid88 second baby 13th 💛
Ncbn first baby 14th 💙
Kennadams fourth baby 16th 💛
Margo34 second baby 16th💛
Aliceinslumberland first baby 16th (CS 39w) 💙
Appleandcheese first baby 18th 💛
Xalexandra first baby 20th 💛
Piggybean first baby 20th 💛
Tropicana1 second baby 20th 💛
Puddingbear 27th (CS 39w) 💛
Springblooms08 first baby 21st 💛
Hannah223344 first baby 21st 💙
Gilm0reGirl second baby 21st 💛
Pommy1 first baby 22nd 💖
Deek88 second baby 24th 💛
Marshmallowmountain first baby 25th 💖
LauraA31 first baby 26th 💛
Peachesthecat third baby 26th 💛
Allfurcoatnoknickers second baby 28th 💖
Limoncelloo 29th March second baby 💖
MamaMenna second baby 30th 💖

@Longbin I agree, doesn't seem to matter whether it's a day I feel OK or tired - it's very frustrating! How soon before your due date do you plan to start mat leave? Is there anything in your job that could be changed to make things easier for you?

@Longbin for similar reasons I'm going to go on mat leave at 34 weeks and I'm not even sorry 😂 but I am lucky in that I get generous mat leave pay and I can also bulk up a couple of unpaid leave months at the end so I'll still get 12 months off hopefully. It would be a harder decision if it meant cutting that time with baby short. What's your leave policy like? X

@alwaysseeingstars I wouldn't ask, it won't go down well! I'd be left with nothing to do. I was going to go at 37 weeks which is mid March but now thinking I might go off early March. If I'm late it's going to be a long time off though!

@Skylark1990 cotton, line dried, washed at 30 or 40 in a laundry bag (only ever 60 if illness). We binned a handful of them almost a year ago in fabric recycling because they had holes and the seams were completely undone/torn. That's with washing in a laundry bag too so can't even blame them catching on the machine 🤷 Either way I'll just get some large flannel fabric and cut it to size myself next but won't get any more cheeky wipes specifically!

@Skylark1990 I get quite a long time off but also I am the main earner so earning nothing at the end is definitely a struggle! I was hoping to take off mid March until mid April including holidays, but going early means I will need to go back early april and pay for an extra few weeks of double nursery fees!

@Longbin I am hoping to start Mat Leave as late as possible so on my due date. I'm a teacher so I don't accrue annual leave during Mat leave (which is totally unfair that other professions get to do that and tack it on the end of their mat leave) and my due date falls at the end of Easter holidays so it makes sense to get paid in full for Easter holidays then start Mat Leave after that.

I know there are other teachers on here but I've forgotten who - I'm considering doing shared parental leave in 3 blocks to get paid for the holidays as a work around, any other teachers considering this?

My 2 packs of cotton cheeky wipes are still going strong. Almost 2 years of washing at 60 and tumbling. I must have got a good batch.
Just watched SJ Strum's latest name video, 50 girl names used under 50 times. Marla and Carys added to my list of maybes!

I came across the name Mayra yesterday which is quite nice I thought, it's Spanish / Hindu and means star of the sea or drop of sea ... Added it to the list as a maybe!

@Longbin that's a difficult call, especially when you have to take into account the added nursery fees. Certainly not an easy one to work out when you're the main earner! I'm the same so sadly won't be taking anywhere near as much mat leave as I'd like, I'm hoping to work until as late as possible to allow more time off with baby afterwards!
@Margo34 that's incredibly unfair, I had no idea teachers don't accrue annual leave during mat leave - surely you should get the statutory minimum at least? (apologies for the ignorance, it's not an area I know). The shared parental leave sounds good though, I think DH & I are going to be looking at doing that so that when I need to possibly go back part time, he can then take time off..

@Margo34 can't believe you don't get holidays on top! Do you get bank holidays? I did that last time, went off the day before my due date and then just took the paid months instead of the whole year. It worked out pretty well for us that time around

@Longbin @alwaysseeingstars you have to time it right to have baby in order to get paid holidays when you're on mat leave as a teacher. September babies are the dream because you can bookend your Mat leave with the summer holidays!

@Skylark1990 that's the same meaning as Marla so must essentially be the same name.
@Margo34 do you mean you would 'return to work' for the main holidays in order to get paid, then return to maternity leave? I didn't know that was possible, I really missed a trick last time if you can do that! However, I did return May half-term, work 7 weeks and get paid for 13 total taking me to the end of the summer holidays to quit aug 31st in order not to miss out on that income, plus the 12 weeks maternity pay at 50%

@Longbin I'm struggling with work at the moment. But judging by last time, I will struggle even more when I return, so I don't want to go on mat leave early and have to return earlier! I think people are more understanding that pregnancy means less productivity rather than sleep deprivation and breastfeeding at 12 months plus.

Yes essentially, under shared parental leave, but both you and partner need to be eligible for SPL (even if your partner ends up not taking any SPL and it's just you that does) Apply for shared parental leave in 3 blocks, so 'return to work' for the holiday, then take the next block of SPL when term restarts. This website explains it better than me! www.teachersspl.co.uk/

@ancienthouse I know what you mean which is part of what is stopping me going early. I feel like I'm more protected being pregnant as they would be worried to get rid of me, whereas after it's just survival of the fittest (and I won't be fittest!)

@Margo34 😮 I did not know about that! You should definitely do it, it's worth too much not to!

Totally feeling the pain with Mat leave.

Im the main earner in a company who has never had to deal with someone falling pregnant before so a nightmare in itself.
As it’s only stat mat pay I’ll be eligible for, I doubt I’ll be able to have more than 2 months off the way it’s looking which is far less than I’d like and have no idea how I’ll manage working from home with a newborn in tow but we’ll manage one way or another.

@Deek88 are you in the UK? I think we get stat pay for 9 months? Understand if it's not enough though... but 2 months is very soon to go back! I'd speak to your employer and see if there is anything else they could do... It's so hard when companies don't have good maternity leave policies, really makes my blood boil tbh. It's just not fair on mums or babies.

Also you might be able to add holiday annual leave and bank hols on to some of your mat leave to make it longer... as you accrue this (or should do) in the UK while on mat leave.

@MamaMenna I am absolutely thinking about it, especially as I'm pretty sure the summer hols are around about 12w ish after I'll be starting Mat Leave anyway...so I'll 'return' for the summer hols then go back on leave for until Christmas hols, 'return' for the hols, then back on SPL from Jan and 'return' again so I'll get paid over the Easter hols and then my year of leave will be up as I'd be returning then anyway. So I'll still be off for a year, I'll just be getting paid for 6+2+2 extra weeks holiday within that.

@Skylark1990
I believe it’s 6 weeks at 90% which it’s fine, and then a drop down to £156 a week which is less than a quarter of my wage. Husbands wage wouldn’t cover the bills alone so I don’t think I’ll have too much choice but to return early. We won’t qualify for UC top ups or anything either as a few quid over the thresholds.

I can use some of my annual leave, but then don’t want to be stung when I return either and have no days to take if I need them for any reason (I have 2 other kids as well).

Def a difficult one, as there was literally no maternity policy in place until I told them I was pregnant a couple of weeks ago and it’s like the blind leading the blind.

@Deek88 I don’t know whether it’s helpful to you or not but I found out you can work self employed whilst on Mat leave so some people take on a delivery job or even JustEat etc to boost their income, just worth knowing I guess.

Im lucky with my job in that I basically have a set amount of work to complete over a year and as long as it’s done I’m pretty much left to it so with that in mind I’ve been doing longer days/squeezing more in now in the hope that I can take things a bit more easy and do more office based tasks towards the end. My Local Authority Mat pay is rubbish but I’ve tried to boost it up by working over time this month and last month as these pay packets are what my Mat pay will be calculated based on. I’m the main earner too though so it’s a bit stressful as stat Mat pay is just so low.

@Deek88 I'm in a similar situation, am the main earner and there is no way DH will be able to cover the bills. It's looking likely I'll have to at least start part time after 3 months, using up SPLIT/KIT days (I see if you take shared parental leave you can work up to 20 SPLIT days each plus the 10 KIT days - would this help you in any way?) and will try to add on a couple of weeks holiday to try and increase it a little. Ideally I'd want a year but it's just not going to be possible on SMP 😥
@AliceinSlumberland thanks for the reminder about working self-employed, I'd forgotten you can do that - this may help a bit!

@SavedByGraceAlone I had my Covid booster and flu jab same day, one in each arm. Felt rough for a couple of days m but think it was side effects from Covid booster rather than flu. Whooping cough booked in for 2 weeks time!

I'm thinking of taking mat leave as late as possible to maximise my time with baby, I'm also the main earner. Might try spread out the 10 KIT days towards the end so I'll have a bit of income.

Lots of sympathy for the other main earners here!

I am on a decent wage which means the drop down to SMP is dramatic. Around 1/4 of my pay. Luckily, I get 2 months full, 4 months half plus smp (effectively around 75% for me) so I will take all that, then maybe 6 weeks on SMP and six weeks accrued holiday to make up 9 months. Wish I could take a year plus holidays like some do but there we are.

DP has nowhere near the earning power I do (at the moment) so there is no choice, especially given the way the economy is going.

Like others, I hope to go as long as I can before maternity. My job is mostly desk based but with elements that require being ‘on’ (running workshops). I will probably not book any of those in the last 4-6 weeks but feeling absolutely fine to do my job atm.

First baby though so I might look back at this with a rueful laugh come March!