Waddling Zombies and Dancing Babies - Due Feb 2008

[Pk616]

Hiya ladies,
Thought I'd start the new thread, hope you like the title! Best I could come up with I'm afraid!

Crikey that's weird PK - I too am having a feline crisis.

Took one of my two to the vets today with a weepy and swollen eye and the vet said his eye is that seriously infected (the membrane is right over the eye today) that they might be required to operate and have it taken out altogether. It was looking a bit dodgy a couple of days ago but he's had this type of thing in the past and it's got better of its own accord. Didn't for one minute think the vet was going to tell me something quite so drastic.

So might be nursing a cat through a surgical recovery over Xmas. He's had an intravenous shot of antibiotics to tide him overnight and I'll take him back first thing in the morning.

Meanwhile the other one is keeping him company in the basket - and probably making things worse by licking him but they are completely inseparable and he's probably getting some comfort.

I'm in shock - this cat is almost 12 years old and has been in amazing health his whole life. It's very sad that he might end up losing an eye cos he's a real looker (Tonkinese).

Hope your cat recovers from his ordeal and the vet can get rid of the oil OK.

HI all sorry not been on much was taken back into hospital again with contractions which been stop start stop start (driving me insane) but next of the womb still closed (which is a good thing as dont want baby this early) ended up begging hospital to allow me home so can be with DD's for Xmas
-as can tell got my own way lol-
I am so tired physically and emotionally just hope can get through christmas day without any problems.
Am waiting to hear back from GP had to take a letter into doc surgery concerning the strep, so am hoping can be given something in meantime to try and fight infection before going into labour, am determined to do whatever it takes......

i meant neck not next....grr brain fried forgive me lol

leggy - sorry to hear that, hope you are feeling ok and have an uneventful christmas.

PK - so sorry to hear about your poor cat. Fingers crossed everything is ok tomorrow.

Eggy - Your twins will always be Dora and Nemo to us!!

Have decided on Emily Lisa for a girl. Db will have dh's surname, not mine but Lisa is my middle name so I will still feel that she has a bit of my name. If it's a boy, um, dunno....

ruva - £200 to clean your windows??? are they going to lick them clean?

You lot are very organised with your names, I haven't started thinking yet. DD didn't have a name for 6 weeks as I was in too much pain to even think about it! We are Welsh so it will probably be something unpronouncible!

Hope your cats get better, mine always has an oily head from sheltering under the car at night.

We went to see F Christmas today and DD cried bitterly, the only child in playgroup to cry. But she redeemed herself by being particularly cute and giggly when I called into work with my sicknote. Evil, smelly boss walked out when I walked in without speaking - hurrah - so I didn't have to be civil to him.

I'm bored at home tonight, DH working all night, hes a copper so going to be busy. All my mates gone drinking, I'm just too fat to go. DH and I set up two of our friends and they are going on their 2nd date tonight, hehehe.

Hiya ladies,

I've decided to try and catch up after pretty much ignoring everyone so I could winge about the cat yesterday so this is going to be a long one, probably!

Sarah - I hope that you and your DH are on good terms again and that your stress levels are coming down.

Ginger - Glad to hear you'll be baking over Christmas week and that your BP has dropped.

Mutha - "Faberge Egg" love it! I'm sorry to hear about your cat. If it's any consellation, my mates cat had to have an eye removed. She coped fine (after a short period of adjustment) and you can hardly notice it's not there (most people think she just likes to wink a lot, they don't realise the eye doesn't open!) I still hope your cat doesn't have to loose his eye though.

Love - loosing my memory? Mine has gone to the Bahamas for Christmas and I don't know if it's ever coming back!

Bean - Congrats on finishing work. Nice sounding leaving gifts! Nothing really fit's me properly at the moment. Luckily for me though I was several dress sizes bigger when I became pregnant so I have maternity clothes that I can still get in to. I think Emily Lisa sounds like a good name. I think I already said what mine are going to be. Kyuss Zappa, for a boy and Kya Elspeth for a girl. Right now we just call the bairn Ky!

Blue - Glad to hear you spoke to your GP about your C-section dilema and he helped you out about with his views. I think I'd rather recover from a surgical scar than a broken tail too! I'm not a sex kitten OR a sex camel these days Sex just doesn't happen anymore as my poor DP is way too nervous to perform! everytime we've done the deed since I've been pregnant something has gone wrong - initially it just hurt then it caused a water infection or two, thrush, flared up my sciatic nerve so I was stuck and in pain and it aggrivates the old SPD - Dp is terrified now that he'll hurt me! he gives me lots of nice hugs though so I'm not complaining. Names are special and important things so if it takes you a bit longer to decide which names you want to use that's fine and nothing to be worried or embarrassed about.

Mana - Glad to hear you can enjoy some festive treats this crimbo. Good plan with the "condition exploitation" Why not? You deserve it! HAPPY CHRISTMAS lass!

Merly - Get well soon! I think most of us have been cursed by colds this christmas, it's just not pleasant.

Gill - interesting Crimbo pressie! At least you it was a thought out gift, better than another pair of socks eh!

Ruva - That's some expensive window cleaning going on! Are your windows on the 50th floor and being cleaned with water imported from the far east and golden squeegies! If I overheard my MIL saying that I was an extravagane gift giver I'd give her something really drab like a new pair of marigolds for christmas!

Lees - There is still plenty of time for the bairn to face t'other way. Think positive and get on all fours!

Egg - Your poor DS. He's had a proper run of bad luck. Have you tried upping his zinc intake? It's really good for building the immune system and is found in peanutbutter, peas, bopiled spuds, oranges, cheddar and baked beans, amongst other things! I can see nothing wrong with the name Jacob but you do both have to agree on it so good luck with that.

Mini - How ya doin lass?

Leggy - sorry you've been in hospital. I hope you have an enjoyable christmas with your DDs yet it is relaxed and uneventful!

My cat, Minya, is home now. It turned out he was drenched in diesel not motor oil. The vet bathed him twice but still couldn't get all of the stuff off his fur. You have to wonder why they didn't shave him, his fur will grow back after all and I'm sure he'd be calmer about it all. He's got to wear his plastic collar, which is making it hard for him to eat, drink and walk around, until we've managed to wash all the diesel out and he's really unhappy. DP and I have got to try and wash him later when DP is home from work. Our other cat, Taffy, is still hiding behing the sofa. He's terrified of this strange smelling creature with a conical head that is walking very awkwardly around the house. It's a real shame 'cause Minya could really do with some love off young Taffy right now!

I've still got this horrid cold but it's progressing so hopefully I won't feel too shit for christmas day.

I know many of you will be very busy or even away over the next few days so I'd like to wish you all a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS. I hope you all keep your buns in the oven and just spend the festive season enjoying yourselves with you families and friends.

Bloody hell PK you are very organised managing to reply to each and every one of us individually in that last post!! I am too lazy . Glad Minya is home again safely although doesn't sound like the vet did his best to help really...

DS strangely does eat most of the foods you mentioned, he eats a lot of peanut butter, boiled potatoes (mashed), he drinks fresh orange (but wont eat orange) and loves baked beans, he was like this last winter, and I think starting nursery in Sept is not helping as everyone (incl me) sends their little ones in with colds unless they are really unwell, so things just keep going round and round. He actually seems ok at the mo, although my cold has come back again and I have Christmas coloured snot (green and red!!!! hehehehe).

Beany - LOVE your new Christmas name. My chosen one was EGGnog but it was taken, and I can't think of another .

Egg - I felt it was the right thing to do 'cause I just pushed on to the thread, ingnored all those in my path, unloaded on everyone and left. I felt I'd been very rude about the whole thing and wasn't very pleased with myself so I came on this morning to re address things. I think (hope) I got every one covered!
Nah, I'm not very impressed with the vets efforts either mind you other than my suggestion of shaving the Minya, which may not be a good idea this time of year either, I don't really see what more he could have done. Still I could do nothing at the time, I was a blubbering wreck so it was £50 well spent in the end.
the zinc was just an idea thb, I think it's just the time of year 'cause nearly everyone I know has come down with a cold this week.
At least there's something festive about yours!!!lol
I want a christmassy name but there's not a lot you can do with PK616!

doubleeggnog?

FABULOUS suggestion princess! I will go and get changed now!

Doubleeggnog is perfect!!! And lol at xmas snot! My nose is pretty festive too!

PK - Your poor cat. How long is it likely to take to get that lot out? Is is affecting your carpets/furniture etc?

Leesmum - there is a lot of stuff on the interweb about "optimum foetal positioning", short version of which is spend as much time on all fours as possible. I had back to back last time and know that it is to be avoided! Ouch!

PK - am trying to come up with a Christmas name for you...

As I recall, perineum "massage" is a bit of a euphamism - not so much gentle rubbing with an oil as stretching and pulling in a bid to toughen your bits up. I could have that wrong, maybe I just stumbled across some hardcore version...!

Dh and ds have gone away overnight to see dh's family. They have just gone and I have only been away from ds a couple of times, when I had to work away. This time I am at home without him so am feeling quite bereft. But hey, it's ok, as dh has left me all the cleaning to do...

thanks for the get well wishes. Oh has cold too - man flu - so we have coughed each other awake for the past 2 nights. Might open the quality street and have a snooze on the sofa.

How do I look?

Eggy - fabulous darling!!!

Merly - Quality Street is renowned for its medicinal properties. In more forward thinking countries, they actually prescribe it for pregnant women.

And lol at whoever described their house as a consumption ward! If I was in a Victorian set drama, I would be dead in 2 episodes (whenever you see someone cough in one of those, it is guaranteed that they will die of TB within the hour ).

Egg - You look good in yellow, it suits you!

Bean - Gawd knows how long it's gonna take to wash the diesel out, but it's gotta be done, watching him sulk in his collar is torture. And yes it is affecting the furniture and the carpets and our clothes and I'm dubious over just how good it is for me and the bairn. It'll never come out of the sofa or the carpet so it's a good job neither cost us anything! Thanks for trying to come up with a name for me! Don't envy your cleaning or lack of assistance and company.

Perineum massage:-

Perineal massage: the hows and whys
By ThinkBaby

What it is
Perineal massage is a way of preparing the tissues of the perineum, between the vagina and the anus, for the stretching that is necessary during childbirth. During birth, the perineal tissues need to stretch a good deal to allow your baby to pass through the birthing canal and if the tissue doesn't stretch enough then it can tear. Slight tearing during birth is quite common, but to prevent substantial tearing midwives or doctors quite often cut into the tissue to give the baby room, a procedure known as an episiotomy.

The aim of perineal massage is to 'train' the perineal tissues to stretch and so help to avoid both tearing and episiotomies, as well as reducing the stinging sensation you experience when your baby crowns. Perineal massage is most effective if practised every day for the last six weeks of pregnancy, so from around week 34, and for between five and ten minutes at a time.

How do you do it?
"Well, sounds great!" You might be thinking, tell me how to do this massage stuff and I'll get cracking. This is where the 'fun' starts, so prepare yourself mentally for sticking your thumbs inside your vagina. Sorry? Yes, I'm afraid that's right, in order to effectively massage your perineal tissues you'll need to be ready to get stuck in there. Advanced students of perineal massage may prefer to get their partners to massage the perineum as an opportunity to share intimacy and involve their other half in childbirth preparations, or even as part of foreplay. But if you'd prefer to ensconce yourself in privacy with a mirror you certainly won't be alone.

You'll need a warm, comfortable environment and privacy, obviously. To massage use a natural massage oil like sweet almond oil, jojoba, coconut butter, wheatgerm or olive oil or a water-based lubricant like KY Jelly. Don't use any petroleum-based products for perineal massage. If you're doing the massage yourself you'll need a mirror, at least for the first few times while you familiarise yourself with the perineal area. A hand-held mirror will be more trouble than it's worth, a large mirror will be easiest.

Whoever is giving the massage should trim their thumbnails or finger nails and scrub their hands and nails.
Sitting with your legs spread comfortably apart, massage a little oil into the outside of the perineum and on your fingers and thumbs
Insert your thumbs about half a thumb length into your vaginal canal, and apply pressure to the perineum, the area between the vagina and anus. If your partner is doing the massage they should use their index fingers. You should stretch the perineum until you feel a slight stinging sensation. When you feel that sensation hold the stretch for about a minute
Circle your thumbs to massage the oil into the tissues down to the base of the vagina, gently pulling the tissues forward and back
Now apply pressure against the sides of the vagina, moving thumbs in a 'u' shape up from the part of the vagina closest to the anus. Again, you should stretch enough to feel a slight stinging sensation, without inflicting pain on yourself. Gently pull the tissues of the sides of the vagina downwards in imitation of how your baby's head will pull on the tissue during birth. Do this about half-way up the sides of the vagina and don't pull, rub, stretch or put pressure on the urethra at the top
Remember that the massage should be gentle and not abrasive or vigorous. Initially you probably won't be able to stretch the tissues very far before the stinging sensation kicks in, but the point of the massage is that with repetition you'll be able to stretch more and more.

To make sure you do the massage every day it helps if you build it into your daily routine. Some women may find that a bath before-hand helps to relax them ready for the massage, others may find the massage itself relaxing, particularly as they become more adept at it. And if the intimacy of perineal massage gets you and your partner in the mood for love then why the hell not!

And don't forget
To make the most of perineal massage team it with your regular Kegel exercises to increase tone and control of your pelvic floor muscles. If you have good control of your pelvic floor muscles then consciously relax them as you perform the massage.

Egg - Sally/Alice?? probably the same camel or a close relli! LOL

Pk and Mutha hope your kitties are ok - we have three cats, its so upsetting when they're poorly.

Leggy - hope you're ok, it's very stressful when you don't know whats going to happen and it just seems so much worse at Chrimbo.

Brussels - love name choice for LO , dd2 is an Emily!

Ruva - perineal massage - well i cant get to mine cos bump so big! but i also read that you need to stretch and massage, as if this isn't undignified enough!

Have a good weekend everyone

Clearly i didn't read PK'S message first! That is the same info i saw, like I said, the indignity! i couldn't get my thumbs there if you paid me!

excellent, i can perineally massage in the bedroom while DH is expanding his movie collection in tother room

v v bad day here. v low. all own fault, been gambling and DH found out. used to be ok when my own money but now i have no income whole different matter.

he is being ok-ish. has barred accounts etc. still v angry. i am having money freakout. and am v v low. cant stop crying even tho' its all done and dusted.

feel like i'm being unfair on DH by still being so low, but am really not trying to manipulate him into being nice to me again, which i dont deserve. am just facing onslaught of horrible thoughts and feeling trapped. and scared. its always when i feel most scared about having no money that gambling becomes a problem.

have overwhelming urge to run away. thought that when i stopped work then i'd no longer be unhappy, 'cause work been such a cause of stress for so long. no i am scared that i'll always have probs. plus the worse i feel and act, the more i feel like he's going to realise what a wreck of a woman he is with.

sorry to go on. thanks for reading, just had to get it off my chest. hope you are all good and looking forward to xmas.

i am now going to carry on scratching the border off the wallpaper in the spareroom. i think the woman who lived here before glued it on! ggrrr.... real pain as we would just be able to paint otherwise, and every time you pick a small bit off, you risk chipping into paper//plaster

long post.... i'll shut up now.

Tyaca - Sorry to hear you're having problems at the moment. I don't know anything about gambling problems but I've had other addictions in my life and you're right, they do usually get worse when times get hard one way or another.
the only thing I can advise is that you get some help with it try this site it may be of some help to you www.gamcare.org.uk/ It appears to be a UK based gambling help site with a community and information on counselling etc.
Also you need to talk to your DH about it. You are really going to need his support to help get you through this and help get your relationship back on track.
You can always vent to us. I for one won't judge you. We're all human and we've all mande mistakes and we will all make many more before we're done!
Take care chick and I hope you're feeling happier soon

tyaca - please don't apologise for getting stuff off your chest. I was very low yesterday and, like you, it made me feel trapped. It's a horrible feeling. From what you say, it sounds like this is a long term issue - do you have support or anyone you can talk to? GA?

Tyaca please don't let this get on top of you too much, you are not a wreck of a woman, have you told dp what you've told us, its sometimes easier to write things down.

You know you can always come on here to vent, no-one will judge or thing any worse of you. Sending BIG HUGS to you xxx

I love the name changes ladies

Pk i'm really impressed with your massive post. And i didn't realise that perenium massage was so detailed, i thought it was just rubbing a bit of cream under your fanny!!

And Brussels i think Emily Lisa is a beautifull name, mainly because my name is ...........sshh........Lisa.........

Have a nice sat night everyone. Oh btw baby has had hiccups EVERY night for about a week now, it lasts about half an hour on and off and is quite annoying, anyone else had this

Hello everyone I haven't posted for ages due to being always tired and having 200 things to do at once.. Anyway I am still tired but have decided the 200 things are just not gonna get done and it won't be the end of the world!!!! of course now that means it is DHs turn to get stressed about Xmas/baby etc since I am no longer doing all the worrying for him! haha serves him right for having no sympathy when I was stressed!

PK feel so sorry for your cat - hope he gets back to normal soon

tyaca you sound so angry at yourself, please don't beat yourself up about this so much that you can't see a way out... at least you have the intelligence to realise that gambling is a mug's game really (some people never realise this!). do keep talking to your dh esp if money is stressing you out. being on 1 income when previously only just managing on 2 is unbelievably stressful - we've done it and both found it very scary. only I was the one with the income and I was constantly paranoid that DH being bored at home would spend all our money on ebay, I think I was very mean to him
.... this might be a bad suggestion but to distract yourself might it help to go online and research what to do with your child trust fund vouchers? - If you do find out anything about this please let us know cos I am very confused by all the options out there!

ty PK, sally, leesmum and beansprout for your responses. it helps so much to have people there to listen.

took me a while but feeling a lot better. DH came home with chocolates for me and after i pulled myself together we have had a nice night. gave up on the border stripping and just watched darts and wrapped presents.

talked to DH and he is wonderful. a real star and i just dont want to blow what i have with him as i couldnt ask for more. we had the same chat a few months ago and i really dont want to let him down again as i am so lucky to have him.

hmmmmppphhhhh

sally your comment re going online and reseaching trust fund made me smile. last time we disconnected my accounts, i used to play free yahoo backgammon while entering every competition on the net! figured playing a game plus the chance of winning a prize almost equalled the same thing

and lol at your giving up on the worrying about the 200 things. rise above 'em! too easy to get caught up in the 'to-do's.

leesmum - not sure if it was hiccups, but i drank far too much fizzy water before bed the other night and i think i paved the way for a career in tap dancing for the lo .

and just to say mini, really nice to hear from you again

take care all and again many thanks for listening. xx

Tyaca - really glad you are feeling better. Your dh sounds lovely.

Dh and ds are still away and I have to say, I've had a really nice time by myself!! I woke up at 8am for the first time in 3 years today!! Bliss!!

Also, for anyone who is thinking of breastfeeding, I found this website which is bloody marvellous. I've been feeding ds for over 3 years and it's taught me all sorts of things I didn't know!! The videos are brill.

here

Tyaca, i don't know much about gambling either but it sounds like dh is lovely and supportive. none of us are perfect hun, that's just your particular demon. Some of your feelings are normal pregnancy ones too, you must remember that. i was horrible to my dh the other day and told him i was going to have the baby and leave him with it! I didn't mean it but it's how i felt at the time! Last night i felt so down i just sat and cried and i wanted to run away, from myself as much as anything. Pregnancy is tough, try to go easy on yourself hun.

Leesmum - out LO gets hiccups several times a day! i find it irritating, i love the feeling of him moving but there's something about the regularity of the hiccups that i find a bit annoying. apparently it's where they swallow the amniotic fluid, which incidently they pee in too, lovely!!