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August 2021 - Heading into the second trimester

999 replies

BertieBotts · 16/02/2021 12:23

Old thread was about to fill up again Wink

I will try to get to the car seat/pram Qs in a bit...

@wimbler - EDD 29 July, having a surprise! 💛
@Champson - EDD 22 August (but really June/July), TBC 💛💛💛
@Jessicapebbles - EDD 5 August (but having C-section at 39 weeks, so really July) 💛
@smurf123 - EDD 5 August (but likely to be July) 💛
@WhatEvenIsSleep EDD 2 August, TBC 💛
@Smushty14 - EDD 6 August, TBC 💛
@Rattyclife - EDD 6 August, TBC 💛
@Biscuitcat - EDD 10 August, having a surprise! 💛
@runnergirl123 - EDD 11 August, TBC 💛
@PurplePansy05 - EDD 12 August, Boy 💙
@BananaHammock23 - EDD 13 August, surprise 💛
@MrsB2019x - EDD 13 August, TBC 💛
@Magik01 - EDD 13 August, TBC 💛
@Carefree1 - EDD 15 August, can't wait to find out 💛
@DressyGerbera - EDD 15 August, surprise 💛
@lucyrp - EDD 16 August, undecided 💛
@BertieBotts - EDD 16 August, want to know! 💛
@Whatshouldbemyusername - EDD 16 August, TBC 💛
@WolfMother326 - EDD 17 August, surprise 💛
@Smallbean27 - EDD 19 August, surprise 💛
@WatermelonKisses - EDD 20 August, surprise 💛
@alittlexmasmagic - EDD 22 August, surprise 💛
@Millymay13 - EDD 22 August, TBC 💛
@Notinthestarsigns - EDD 23 August, TBC 💛
@northernsquirrel- EDD 31 August, surprise 💛

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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lucyrp · 17/02/2021 19:44

@olderthanyouthink very true 🤣

BertieBotts · 17/02/2021 20:46

SIDS advice varies slightly all over the world, this is just because of how data analysis works really - the raw data doesn't give you a clear answer of this is risky, that is not - it's just numbers. So it's up to data analysts to look at these numbers and translate it into advice that an actual human can follow. That process itself is a bit subjective - what one person will consider is a reasonable risk, another person will consider isn't. And in addition to that, what one person considers a significant factor will differ from what other person thinks - that's when they're looking at the same data. Sometimes it's obvious like if something has a bigger impact vs a smaller one, but if the numbers are similar then it can be less clear. And when you're writing advice, you also have to consider what's reasonable for people to do vs what would be a massive pain in the arse and therefore what people are actually likely to follow.

So the data doesn't tell us at what age it's safe to move to another room, because the age of babies wasn't controlled for in the studies, just whether they were in the same room or not. I would guess this is where they've come from with both of those recommendations:

12 months: The risk of SIDS exists up until 12 months, therefore the recommendation ought to exist until 12 months. The data that we have didn't differentiate between ages of babies, so the risk reduction most likely applies at all ages.

6 months: The majority of SIDS cases occur before this age, so having the guideline to this age will make the most difference to the most babies. UK houses are also often a lot smaller than US houses, so parents are liable to want to move a baby out of their room ASAP. If people find a guideline impractical, they may well ignore it completely - by saying 6 months, most people get to about 4 months at least, which covers the most risky period.

From what I've read: The risk of SIDS drops sharply at 4 months, to the point it probably doesn't matter quite as much about being strict with the regulations, but you should be more careful about anything that contradicts SIDS recommendations earlier than this. The risk of SIDS peaks at 2 months and is highest under 4 months. After 4 months it drops to very low, so when you're talking about "double the risk" it's like 0.001% to 0.002%, something like that.

Emily Oster Crib Sheet, or there's a new one called Bottom Line for Baby (can't remember author) are really good for picking apart this stuff!

There's another good sleep/SIDS recommendation example, that I have noticed recently as a difference between countries one. The UK has somewhere in one of the official advice bodies a small line which explains that all sleep must be in the same room as you up to 6 months for all sleeps, which seems to explicitly mean that you shouldn't put them into the cot upstairs in the evening, or for a nap in a separate room. This was not always there - it DEFINITELY wasn't there in 2008 when DS1 was born, which I appreciate is ancient history in terms of safety recommendations. But it's only appeared some time in the last few years, and MN (as a community) has taken it really seriously, berating anyone who advocates for an upstairs bedtime for babies under 6 months. Now in other countries (or at least, the US and Germany which are the only two I've looked at, I'll be fair!) it doesn't explicitly say this, just that the baby should share your bedroom, which is how the UK advice used to be worded as well.

Now, again, I would guess that the data analysts have gone weeeeell... SIDS doesn't just occur between the hours of 11pm-7am. SIDS can occur at any time during any sleep. We probably should be reminding parents that SIDS guidance needs to be taken seriously for all sleeps, not just for that big chunk of sleep you (hopefully) get at the same time. And actually I think it is Lullaby Trust which advocates for this, and their main purpose is as a support charity (prevention/awareness is secondary) so it's quite possible that the change in wording was prompted by a parent who did suffer a loss unfortunately during that "bedtime" hour of 7pm-11pm or during a daytime nap where their baby was sleeping in another room, and perhaps they had taken the room sharing advice literally rather than thinking about how SIDS advice really applies to every sleep. So I can see why it would be advised to do this as well, but again, nowhere else in the world (and I don't think even the NHS) are so specific about every sleep, the wording is more just "in your room".

OP posts:
PurplePansy05 · 17/02/2021 21:33

Thanks @BertieBotts, I understand the science behind the recommenations work, it's just that there was no background information as to why the 12 months might be better. I personally am the type of person who would follow the safest advice available and I got worried as to whether I could actually do it. It is guaranteed I will be back in work before my son is 12 months old and I don't know how this would work then, I physically won't always be with him when he's asleep. Not sure about sleeping in one bedroom then either. I think I am that bit more worried because it's a boy which makes him higher risk and because I couldn't bear losing him after what I've been through, I genuinely think I just couldn't go through it. I know I need to stop thinking this way, I can't change the past or control the future. Loss is a very difficult matter, you never fully move on, you only move forward, always carrying it with you. But I can't do more than just do my best and hope he'll be ok, I guess. This sort of thing is my worst fear, tbh. xx

Magik01 · 17/02/2021 23:36

@LyraShaeLilly I had the tutti bambini cozzee with DS and still be reusing it this time around as well. I really liked it. When looking at the snuz pod I just thought it looked so narrow and felt the tutti would be more comfortable.

It also has a function where you can higher or lower each side to help with reflux. I’m not sure if others have this! It also looks nice, I got it in grey. Smile

Whatshouldbemyusername · 18/02/2021 07:17

Good morning ladies.

@Magik01 I was looking at getting the tutti bambini cozzee too mainly coz of the fact can go up and down plus reflux function. It’s similar to the Chicco next to me magic which was also an option. How long did baby manage to sleep in it before he/she grew out of it?x

Magik01 · 18/02/2021 07:35

@Whatshouldbemyusername he slept in it until 6 months until he moved to his own room, but he would have fitted in it for at least a few more months if we did keep him in our room! However he was quite a smallish baby, around the 20-25th percentile. But I would recommend it. Smile

afictionado · 18/02/2021 07:35

@PurplePansy05 I don't know about the regulations in the UK but where I am (NZ) in any early childhood care setting there has to be someone present while a baby is sleeping. (We have the same recommendation of being in the same room as baby for all sleeps.) So even if you go back to work early then if someone else is looking after your son then they should be in the same room while he's napping, which should provide the same benefit.

From what I've read the highest risk period is from birth to six months, but there's still a small risk after that. If there are any other risk factors (e.g. one or both parents are smokers) or if the baby has other health concerns then I'd probably be cautious for longer. I tend towards anxiety and my son was a bit higher risk so it made me feel better to have him in our room past six months. (Okay, he's still there. And still comes into our bed halfway through the night. Haven't quite figured out how sleeping arrangements will go when the baby arrives...)

Whatshouldbemyusername · 18/02/2021 07:46

@Magik01 thank you!!x

Fran919 · 18/02/2021 07:48

@Magik01@Whatshouldbemyusername I’m also looking at this but I’m a terrible sleeper in that my arms hang of the bed, some nights I’ve got half of the duvet over me and on the floor whilst husband is freezing on the other side so I’m concerned it’ll fall into it as our bed is quite high.

Has anybody used a proper cot next to them? We have the room luckily but perhaps not as easy to get baby in and out at night is what I’m thinking? Really random too but do people need a night light so they can see what they’re doing - first timer if you can’t tell haha.

lucyrp · 18/02/2021 07:59

@Fran919 I had a cot in my room from when DS was 6 months to 2.5 then he went into his own room straight into a single bed x

Magik01 · 18/02/2021 08:12

@Fran919 I ended with with an ECS so a cot would have been really difficult for me to get in and out of bed multiple times a night when in agony anyway 😂 But I know plenty of people do do it if they have the space! As per nightlight, yes I had one constantly plugged in next to be and baby for the whole six months. It wasn’t really bright just a glow if you get me. It helped me see what I was doing plus I think it helped him get used to falling asleep in any light.

BertieBotts · 18/02/2021 08:14

Having a normal cot is what people used to do before all these bedside ones were available :)

I remembered what I actually came to post last night before I got tangled up in statistics :o I have been wearing really baggy clothes or wrapped up in 10 layers to go outside, but last night I had a onesie on and went to put DS2 to bed and he really freaked out and didn't like being able to see my bump! I went away and came back and he seemed to accept it better but it was really unexpected. I wonder how he will react now it's more visible in general.

OP posts:
Fran919 · 18/02/2021 08:20

Thanks both! Might go with the cot idea for now and if anything changes I.e a CS might need to rethink and hope Amazon prime can deliver quickly.

lucyrp · 18/02/2021 08:25

@BertieBotts oh no! Me OH and DS have been having belly competitions to see who's is the biggest for the last couple of weeks so it's quite funny as I'm now winning 🤣🙈

BertieBotts · 18/02/2021 08:29

Haha there's a brilliant photo of my mum pregnant with me standing back to back with my grandad who has a pot belly!

OP posts:
biscuitcat · 18/02/2021 08:59

@BertieBotts thank you for all that information, so useful! Would you recommend Cribsheet? I really enjoyed Expecting Better so was wondering about buying that one too. Bless your DS, must have been a surprise for him to see you with a bump! I hope he's alright now!

Has anyone else had awful itching? For the past week or so it's been dreadful and I've got a rash type thing all over my hips and quite a lot on my thighs and arms too, it's horrid - last night I woke up for itching and have been applying moisturiser with aloe Vera in about 3 times a day all over. If anyone has any recommendations for a moisturiser or something that will help ease it I'll be eternally in your debt!!

BertieBotts · 18/02/2021 09:22

There is a pregnancy type of itching that should be mentioned to your midwife I think.

I haven't actually read crib sheet but it's supposed to be good! I'm considering it but I'd be bankrupt if I bought every book I wanted to read :o

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 18/02/2021 09:24

I've got an appointment this morning. 14 weeks now so apparently the external genetalia might be able to be seen! DH wants me to ask the doctor to write it down so we can discover together Blush let's see if I have the nerve to ask!

OP posts:
Alittlexmasmagic · 18/02/2021 09:26

@biscuitcat I had horrendous itching in my first trimester with DS. It petered out at 14/15 weeks I think. It was mostly around my boobs but elsewhere as well. I'd had it previously, always around the time I was due on so suspect it was hormonal. Ordinarily I'd have taken antihistamines but all I could do was slather on moisturiser. Try to avoid scratching although it's so difficult.
Mention it to your MW as Colistasis can be an issue in pregnancy but usually appears later on on palms and feet etc.x

PurplePansy05 · 18/02/2021 09:39

My bump has also made an appearance! I'm a bit freaked out because it seems to have become a lot more pronounced yesterday and today and all normal clothes are getting tighter! Happy 15 weeks to us today 💙 I'm still wearing my normal size (but stretchy) dress and normal tights, but the bump is definitely there! @BertieBotts will they tell you the sex today??

@biscuitcat I had terrible itching in my first pregnancy and a kind of sun rash on my thighs particularly (the outcome wasn't linked to it, pls don't worry), it was because of high progesterone and I was prescribed a special body ointment from the pharmacy, Hydromol. It was a revelation and safe in pregnancy. Comes in a huge tube too! Definitely mention to your MW as it might be something else in the second trimester, but nevertheless this ointment may help you on a daily basis, worth asking! xx

ame88 · 18/02/2021 09:41

Dating scan now putting due date at 28th August 🥰
Baby is perfect and I had to twerk to get he/she uncurled

August 2021 - Heading into the second trimester
RockyRockyRoad · 18/02/2021 09:47

@biscuitcat I had a very itchy belly with my first pregnancy and now again (with a little rash). I use Aveeno and bio-oil probably about twice a day, but you should be ok to use any moisturiser suitable for your skin.
I spoke to my mw last time about it and she said it’s just due to skin stretching

Alittlexmasmagic · 18/02/2021 09:49

@ame88 gorgeous photo x

@Champson just had a random conversation on DS's Aug group. Could be a coincidence re. triplets or in fact a small world but one of them is Trusty's Mrs if that makes sense?x

lucyrp · 18/02/2021 09:50

@biscuitcat yeah I've been really itchy especially around a specific tattoo on my leg. My belly has gotten dry and flaky too thus making it itchy. Shea butter and coconut oil are the one! I've been using a body shop Shea body butter and a normal jar of coconut oil from the supermarket!

@PurplePansy05 yeah my bump has literallt appeared since Saturday evening and now I feel huge! Il post a pic below. Started wearing maternity leggings from Monday and can't believe how comfy they are.

LottSE20 · 18/02/2021 09:57

@lucyrp your bump looks cute! I’m envious, I’m not showing at all yet, but I have quite a chubby belly (not helped by the huge amount of white carbs I put away in the first trimester).

@ame88 great scan photo. Did it put your EDD back or bring it forward?

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