August 2021 - Scans and booking in!

[BertieBotts]

Continuation of August 2021 thread :)

@HopefulB Will be thinking of you. How far along are you now? I remember you saying you had a couple of RMC scans already, this must be a third one, do I remember that correctly? I would think your MW will either give you the booking scan date or ask you to book it yourself later this week, it seems it's all done differently in different parts of the country. It won't be long anyway! Let us know how it goes tomorrow xx

@WolfMother326 that's a really sensible and sensitive way to phrase it - forums like this are so useful but communicating in writing does have its disadvantages!

Speaking for myself, I've been really fortunate and not experienced any losses but I find knowing as much as possible calming, so reading and researching is a coping mechanism for anxiety for me, even without difficult experiences to enhance those feelings or make them more pertinent. If anyone's read Expecting Better (which I adored and really recommend), she's similar, where lots of info is reassuring.

On a different topic, has anyone told work yet? I told my manager this morning as I know she's working out staffing quite soon for the next few months. I was so nervous but she was lovely which was a huge relief.

@biscuitcat I've told my manager as she's fantastic and a huge support. She's said she won't pass the news up the line until I give her the go ahead. It's that bit I'm nervous about, as soon as a mat leave post gets put out, it'll be like a huge signpost telling people it's me and I'm not a fan of big announcements 🙈 x

@biscuitcat I told my manager at 5 weeks - a) because she guessed 😂 and b) I work for children’s services so the risk assessment needed to be updated

I’m clearly poorly today, DH just fed some lettuce to our guinea pig and he was so happy he purred. I cried. 🙈

I’m sorry if I’ve caused any problems @PurplePansy05

Thank you to those who have offered advice but I may step away from this thread as I’ve started something that has upset people and I’m quite upset about that I’m so sorry. Take care ladies.

You really haven't @LBunz, my comments were not aimed at you in any way. Please do not take them as such 💐

@LBunz you haven't started anything.
Do step away if needed but please don't completely leave. We're all right here if you need us xx

@LBunz Sorry to see you go 💙 are you on the Facebook group? I think it’s a bit more personable when you can see people’s actual names and faces and it’s been such a good support network x

@biscuitcat I haven't told my manager yet, she'll be happy for me as she recently came back from mat leave after an ivf baby but she will be annoyed too as were severely short staffed and were on a recruitment freeze. Wfh at the moment but if we weren't I would have had to tell her because I've been so ill. She wants a 1:1 meeting with me either this week or next week via teams so will probably have to tell her then. Worried she'll tell me I can't return to work as normal like everyone else ☹️

[quote MrsB2019x]@LBunz Sorry to see you go 💙 are you on the Facebook group? I think it’s a bit more personable when you can see people’s actual names and faces and it’s been such a good support network x[/quote]
@LBunz I agree with this! Please join the Facebook group.

@biscuitcat I told my manager last week, as I work the the NHS I didn't want to be putting myself at risk with the pandemic. She is very supportive and I am relieved I don't have to see covid positive - although I do think colleagues may guess the sudden change! But I'm sure they will wait for me to tell them, decided against the vaccine until after birth to.

@MrsB2019x @ame88 how can I find the FB group? X

Due 1st August. 3rd baby. 38. Found out today that downs and edwards were low risk so feels real now.

@BananaHammock23 Search for ‘Sunday of Summer’ on Facebook x

@biscuitcat I'm a freelancer and most of my work is on a x-month contract (never longer than 6 months). I haven't told any of my regular clients because I'm so scared they won't book me in the lead up to having the baby... obviously this is going to get trickier as I near my due date but I'm trying to take on as much work as I can now to see me through a short maternity leave (statutory maternity won't go far!). Doesn't help that DP hasn't worked for a year now because of covid (also freelance)! 😬 I reckon I'll only be able to afford to 3 months off, especially if DP's industry doesn't return. I've got to play it very carefully with who I tell, it's difficult! I doubt I'll even tell people when I've got a baby!

Thanks @MrsB2019x - just requested to join :)

Glad that most people who have told work have had a positive reception 😊

@Alittlexmasmagic ahh that's tricky if you're not a fan of big announcements isn't it - I'm sharing my news at our next team meeting and my manager was very sweet saying everyone will be happy as everyone loves baby news!

@MrsB2019x so lovely about the guinea pig!! That's the type of thing that would set me off at the moment too 😂

@lucyrp it's so nerve wracking isn't it? Especially if it might mean you can't work normally - I don't know about you but I cannot wait to finish working from home, I miss people so much!

@Smallbean27 I'm sure they'll wait to ask even if they do guess! What a relief not to have to work with covid positive people, glad you're getting that support. At least by the time babies arrive there hopefully shouldn't be too much of a wait for the jab, at the speed they're going now!

@BananaHammock23 oh that does sound like a bit of a dilemma, I hope it's not too stressful for you. My mat leave is a bit up in the air too, I'm hoping I can take a good 9 months or so but DH works in aviation - he's still got his job at the moment thank goodness so we can afford that but if the industry carries on in the direction it is then we'll need my salary!

@biscuitcat yes very fed up of wfh. It's completely different to what I actually do in work as my job is very public orientated. Just want to see some people again!

I haven’t told work yet, my manager drove me mad last time I was pregnant once he knew and so at the moment I am finding it much easier him not knowing. I would ideally like to not tell work for as long as possible. I don’t think you legally have to tell them until 24 weeks but I’m guessing that would be frowned upon to leave it that long. Also as time goes on it would be better to have the time off for appointments rather than having to keep using annual leave.

I feel like my bloat is starting to turn to bump already, I don’t know if it actually is but definitely feels like it!

I had to tell work pretty early on due to bad sickness, but I was put back on furlough again 4 weeks later due to lockdown and looks like I’ll be gone 20 weeks by the time we reopen again. 😬 think everyone else will be shocked when I return with a bump haha
Maternity leave I’ll be taking 9 months although my partner has just applied for a new job so hoping he’ll get that as it’s a lot higher paid so hopefully I won’t have to return to work 🤞🏼Although I am actually missing work right now!

I haven't told my boss yet either. I have a one to one in two weeks so I think I'll say then (that will be a week after my scan). I know they will be fine about it but I feel like I'm just back at work as I took 12 months maternity and then I was furloughed for a few months so I was off work for nearly 16 months! In the normal world though I know two years between babies is quite normal but because of Covid/furlough etc it all feels a bit quick!

Helpful to read about everyone telling or not telling their work about pregnancy at this stage. I am WFH and have been for the entire pandemic. My contract is coming to an end in the spring, so I probably won't get anything but SMP or Mat Allowance, but I expected this and have saved up. I think I'll tell my boss soon, we're having a one-to-one tomorrow, perhaps that's the time as I have several appointments coming up.

Has anyone been having trouble sleeping? I haven't had a good night's sleep in about a week. I wake up at 3 or 4 am and think it's morning...makes sitting indoors working all day a bit tricky as the bed is just right in the next room!

I have my 1:1 either this thursday or next and I wouldn't tell her for a good few more weeks but we want to put something on Facebook at week 13-14 ish so il have to tell her before I do that. Everyone else at work knows I'm pregnant apart from her as those 3 are 3 of my closest friends anyway. Not looking forward to it 🙈🙈

Sigh of relief here - all is well 😀
Hope the same is true for you @PurplePansy05

My manager knows. Will let the rest of the senior team know after dating scan, others only if it comes up. There will be a battle for money to get any cover for my mat leave so already trying to work out what would be best for the team. I really have no idea how much time I want off.... Also want to consider shared parental leave with other half.

@biscuitcat Yes I’m the same as @MrsB2019x working for children’s services meant I needed to tell work very early so I could be risk assessed as safe to continue to work face to face with families. I’ve felt very supported by my manager thankfully! I felt a bit nervous to join the fb group until I was a bit further long as worried I may even see someone I know and cover be blown!

@WolfMother326 I’m having the exact same problems at night, so exhausted come 8/9pm. Then I wake thinking it’s morning, needing a wee and feeling nauseous at 3/4/5am and really struggle to go back to sleep. Last night I tried to read which helped... last week I was going in the living room and watching TV which my friend said was silly as too overly stimulating!