First timers due in Octoberish

[Kittiwake]

Hi this thread is for any first timers or anyone really who wants to chat about their imminent arrival and general lack of idea of what to expect!

I realise that there is already an October thread but there seems to be quite a few people who have come a bit late to join in the discussion on there. Hope this doesn't offend anyone

Morning all!

Here's what has been recommended to me and I think it's rather good!

"I would like my labour and the birth of my baby to be as simple and straightforward as possible. I do not want any unnecessary interventions. If you feel an intervention would be in the best interests of me and/or my
baby, please discuss the benefits and risks of the procedure and suggest possible alternatives to me.

One thing that is very important to me is...(maximum 50 words - so that it gets read and remembered)"

Remember, you won't need to say who you want in the room or where you want to be(unless you are asking for something unusual); what position you want to be in (because you won't know until you get there); what pain relief you want (again - who knows how you are going to feel and anyway, the full range will be available to you so you do not need to decide now); what interventions you do/do not want (again you will need to decide on the day,
taking all factors into consideration); etc, etc.

Hope that helps girls!

Have a good Saturday!

x

Thanks - I really wish the midwife had taken the time to discuss it with me.

One thing you mention about not needing to say who is in the room with you. You might want to mention if you don't want students in the room - especially if it is a teaching hospital. I know that is an issue where I am going.

Hello everyone,

That looks good WMWG. I'm going to a teaching hospital too Stefka so that's a good point about not wanting students in the room.

I'm quite into my Ina May Gaskin book on natural childbirth and she talks about how labour can be unnecessarily long and difficult (and can even regress - eg. go from being 7cm dilated to 4cm dilated) if the woman feels uncomfortable with the people around her. She makes the point that all other animals go off somewhere quiet and safe (like cats going under a bed or a behind a sofa) to give birth. No one wants an audience!

Maybe I'll make a start on my plan this weekend. I'll put it on here if I come up with anything good.

BTW, how organised are all of you in terms of buying things like nappies? I've only bought one pack because I didn't know what kind to buy or how many . I need to get a nursing bra too. Maybe I'll go shopping next week.

I bought a few packs of new born nappies then I plan to use cloth.

I haven't got nursing bras yet - need to get that sorted out soon.

Is the Ina May Gaskin book really good? I tried to get it out of the library but they didn't have it. I wondered if it was worth buying. I have been trying not to buy stuff because we are so skint at the moment.

I have to have another nap - that's my second today. My belly aches today for some reason.

I really like the Ina May Gaskin one (not the Spiritual Midwifery one, the other one). It's a little bit hippyish but I think a lot of what she says makes sense and it's full of really positive birth stories. I think it's made me feel a bit more confident in my ability to do this...whereas before I was feeling quite petrified and worried about the pain etc. I think I got it fairly cheaply on Amazon.

I want to get my nursing bras next week but I really can't face going into the centre of town at the moment. I don't know if it's just a London thing or if it's the same everywhere but people seem quite happy to barge past a preggers lady or walk into her bump without even saying sorry!

I'm keen on using cloth nappies too but I just don't know where to start. I thought I'd start on disposables and then, once I've got into a bit more of a routine, try to switch to non-disposable ones.

The Nappy Lady is a good site to get advice from. I got a pack of different ones to try through a local scheme although they were still fairly expensive so I hope I did the right thing. There are a few different ones for me to try out. They are more expensive but cheaper in the long run.

Do you guys know what you are planning to do about the delivery of the placenta? My hospital give the injection as a matter of routine so if I don't want that I am going to have to make sure I tell them. I can't really discuss it with them as they are really for us having the injection. I am not sure what is for the best though.

I was wondering about that injection too. I read somewhere (Ina May Gaskin probably) that it wasn't a good idea and that there's no reason why the placenta shouldn't come out of its own accord.

Maybe it's worth starting a thread on the childbirth board about it. There are quite a few midwives and doulas on there who might have some good advice.

Since we were talking about this before, thought I'd post this link to another thread on MN. It's got some tips on birth plans...

Well I am up in the middle of the night again!

I had really bad tummy cramps tonight. I took some paracetamol and that helped though. I did have a wee moment of oh my god I am in labour though. Now my back is killing me so I am sitting up with a hot water bottle.

I had heard some negative things about getting the injection too. If you have had a natural birth then why not just let the placenta deliver naturally too. One woman I spoke to this week however who had just had a baby said to get it - she said you are exhausted and you want to cuddle your baby not do more pushing and that there is more danger of heavy bleeding if you wait. Who knows though - I will maybe post about it to see what others say.

Hi stefka - sorry to crash your AN thread but you seem to be the only person still awake!! Do you mind me rtalking to you (ignore me if you do!! ) When are you due? I had my 3rd bby in april which probably seems like ages ago to you but has flown by for me so I remember the sleepless heavily pg nights all to well!!

Hi - was wondering if anyone else would be up. This is my first baby so tonight was really funny when those cramps kicked in - I got really nervous! Is your LO keeping you awake?

Morning All

OK, lots of bits of info today!

Student midwives. The hospital Miljo and I are going to is also a teaching hospital and there is a student midwife on my team of midwives. Your 'named' midwife during labour may well be assigned to more than one labouring woman so won't be with you all the time. If you have a student assigned to you, she can be there, in the room, the whole time if you want her to - she will not be assigned to more than one person. And you can ask her to go out for a bit if you want a bit of privacy. Personally, I'm going to say that I'm more than happy for our student to be there (she's lovely).

Injection or natural placenta delivery - not having the injection means it could take up to an hour and yes, there is a risk of heavier bleeding as it come away. However, not having it clamped immediately means that blood is still flowing to the baby, so in effect it's getting an extra top up of everything good. Also, having the injection can mean the womb contracts too fast, so meaning you have to have a 'procedure' to remove it. It's a hard one - I want the baby to have all the extra blood and goodness, but I'm not sure I want to wait up to an hour to birth the placenta and be able to move around again properly. And anyway...I hate needles...!

Cloth nappies - we have got the Mother-ease ones from Nappy Lady. I also highly recommend this site - they will recommend the type depending on your requirements. However, a friend used Mother-ease ease and found them super as they are one size and shaped, so no folding!

Bras and shopping - I agree - Oxford Street is hideous. Can you get to any of the out of town centres? I took my Mum to Bluewater last time she was here and she has fallen in love - she HATES shopping! If you have to go to Oxford Street, DON'T go on Saturday and go as early as you can on a weekday, before all the Japansese tourists get there! I work - well, until my mat leave started! - on Regent Street and avoided Oxford Street like the plague!

Right - finishing off the carpets today, hanging the curtains and my Mum's coming down, so must get on! Have a good Sunday!

PS - sorry this is soooo long!

xx

Hi everyone,

Not posted on ante-natal before and really glad to see this thread. The other October one seemed so long-established that I couldn't follow it, so thanks for starting this up.

I'm due on Oct 12th, although at first they said Oct 6th so I'm still half expecting it to happen around then, which would be a nightmare as we may be moving house on the 5th!!!

Having just read Miss Bumpy's warning, I am v daunted, but the house chain has been so crazy that it's just ended up being this way. My plan to keep my sanity is just to get up from the sofa here (in SE London nr Greenwich coincidentally!) and then sit down on the sofa again there (in SW London nr Streatham) and leave everything else to dh. The big bother is not knowing which hospital I'll end up at - MayDay if we've moved, Tommy's if he arrives early - but I guess that's just one more unknown to add to the huge list of unknowns that we're all facing, eh?

Hi Pinkdelight Hope I didn't put you off with my moans about moving. I'm sure yours will be much less stressful. At least your DH is doing all the hard work...my DP promised to do everything and then seemed to leave most of it to me !

Stefka, sorry you were up all night with cramps. Do you think they could be braxton hicks?

WMWG, that's reassuring about the student midwife. I had images of a crowd of (male!) students all peering at the business end of proceedings while taking notes!! Now you mention it, I was seen by a really nice student midwife when I was at Royal London and she actually seemed nicer and more competent than a lot of the qualified midwives I met there. Maybe I'll reconsider on the students front.

I'll try to look up what I read about the injection for getting the placenta out. I can't remember why it didn't recommend it but I think it was something along the lines of what WMWG said...I think it can cause the uterus to contract quite quickly which leaves only a short window of time for the placenta to deliver. If the placenta doesn't deliver asap, you can end up having to have surgery to get it out because the uterus and cervix have already closed up. I'm tempted to avoid the injection. Maybe you could say something like if the placenta hasn't delivered naturally within an hour, then you'll have the injection?

Does anyone know about the vitamin K injection? I'm not sure what that's for and what the pros and cons are.

There's so much to think about isn't there? It sounds like I need to get myself onto the nappy lady website this week too.

PS. WMWG, I'm the wrong side of London for Bluewater. I might try to persuade my mum to drive me to Brent Cross though. Or I might just go to Oxford St tomorrow morning...it's not usually so bad on weekday mornings. I was hoping to get measured for a nursing bra at Bravissimo and the only Bravissimo shops i know are in town.

Morning - I just got up - mind you I didn't go back to to bed until 4am!

Welcome pinkdelight - the 12th is my wee cousins birthday so he would be pleased with that due date. I will update the list in a minute. Good luck with the move - hope it isn't too stressful.

I have been getting a lot of braxton hicks but they have never caused me pain before - maybe they are getting more severe or something.

When I was in London I loved going to Rigby and Peller for my bras - that is such a nice shop!

I like the idea of a student if I knew there would be one who would stay the whole time but like everything else where I am it has not been discussed with me so I don't want to risk random people wondering in and out of the room. Also I have heard the rooms are tiny so there is hardly any space for your partner and the midwife and it's really important that my partner can stay close to me.

I am going to try and find out more about this placenta thing at my next NCT class if I can. I also don't know much about the vitamin K injection although I know it is another routine procedure at the hospital I am going to.

Ahh I can hear our never ending house guest getting up - that'll be the end of my peace and quiet.

Pinkdelight 12th Oct
WMWG 13th Oct
Stefka 14th Oct
Miss Bumpy & Kittiwake 15th Oct
Primigravida 20th Oct

Stefka, sounds like your house guest has well and truly over-stayed their welcome! Could you maybe tell them that there won't be room once the baby arrives or make something up about how you need them to get out because you want to decorate that room before the baby arrives or something? Some people are so thick skinned! Surely it's obvious that you're about to have a baby and you probably could do without having house guests at the moment!

BTW, I don't want to freak you out but I've read that BH contractions aren't painful but real ones are...maybe you should call the midwife if it carries on today? I've got friends who didn't realise they were in labour for the 1st part of it (they just thought they had back pain or a few odd twinges and didn't think anything of it)!

I love Rigby and Peller too but not sure they do nursing bras. It's a lovely shop though and their bras fit beautifully.

It seems to have settled now but I will definitely call if I get anymore!

It's a very complicated situation with this guest. He doesn't speak English and is from a different culture where it isn't unusual for families all to live in one or two rooms to he won't realise. My husband needs to talk to him - I just told him to please do it today so I hope he does.

Morning everyone

How are you all doing today?

I'm feeling a bit knackered after a really bad night's sleep. Lots of trips to the loo and lots of tossing and turning trying to get comfortable.

Hope you're all doing ok. Hope your BH contractions have calmed down Stefka. I'm starting to wonder if I'm odd for not having any BH contractions . I haven't had a single one. Hopefully it's not a sign that my baby's going to be really overdue!

Morning.

You probably have had them but not noticed them yet.

Found this article which is about the third stage -

www.homebirth.org.uk/thirdstage.htm

it's on a site about home birth but quite interesting anyway. It seems that there is a middle option of waiting until the cord stops pulsating then having the injection. I am going to have to try and work up the courage to discuss all this with the midwife when I see her next week.

Hi,

Thanks for that link. It's that bit about the "trapped placenta" which makes me wince! I think I'm going to go for the waiting until the cord stops pulsing and delivering the placenta naturally. I'm sure I've been told that by that stage you're so exhausted and so excited about your baby that you couldn't care less about the placenta and you don't even notice the 3rd stage.

I don't think I have been having BH contractions you know. I thought they were hard to miss. My mum says she doesn't remember ever having them either.

PS. Any progress on the unwanted house guest?

I think some women don't notice them at all. I read somewhere you have them all the way through pregnancy but only notice them towards the end.

That trapped placenta thing freaks me out as well. So does being sick which I hate and apparently the injection can make you do that.

Guest progress is minimal. Hubby says he is going to sort it but then never does anything about it. It's starting to get me down.

How's the boiler?

I just haven't felt anything that feels at all like a contraction. Maybe I'm mistaking some little BH contractions for baby movements or something?

No progress on the boiler Luckily we're just upstairs from my mum's flat so I'm going to pop down there for a bath in a minute but it's not really ideal. We need to have it sorted out before the baby comes because I'm guessing it's useful to have hot, running water when there's a newborn baby in the house! I'm really annoyed with the woman whose flat this is because she didn't mention any problem with the boiler and she's now ignoring my emails!

Maybe you should tell DH that you're going to move out (to your mum's or a mate's house) unless he tells the house guest to go! That might speed things up a bit !

Morning

Hope everyone had a good weekend. I have been really busy with visitirs and trip to Ikea in Cardiff (ugh!)

I wasn't sure that I had felt BH either but I think like you missbumpy it's hard to tell them from baby movements last few days though I have been thinking maybe I have.

My midwife came to my house last week to go through my birth plan with me. I am so impressed with the ante-natal care here - there is some advantage to living in middle of nowhere She was very helpful re: placenta as I was pretty confused and I have now put down that I would like to deliver in naturally if possible but that if it's not shifting I will have the injection. Are your DH's going to cut the cord mine thinks he might faint if he had to do this te he he probably will anyway.

Sorry about your bolier Miss B that does not sound fun at all we just had ours replaced last week ridiculously expensive but glad it's done.

Regarding nappies I got some from e-bay and some from Flame who is around on this site and advertises in the for sale section under bumfluff nappies she is really, really helpful I got some newbon ones called bimbles they are so cute!