First timers due in Octoberish

[Kittiwake]

Hi this thread is for any first timers or anyone really who wants to chat about their imminent arrival and general lack of idea of what to expect!

I realise that there is already an October thread but there seems to be quite a few people who have come a bit late to join in the discussion on there. Hope this doesn't offend anyone

Hello Miljo

That's 2 teachers we've got on here now!

I finished work a week ago and not a moment too soon! I'm in London, and was travelling overland train and tube to get to work.

I still have loads to do, but I think after this weekend, when we're cleaning the nursery carpet (!), I should be able to get stuff done pretty much next week. I just feel so bad when I have a day doing nothing very visible!

But dh and I are going through a very difficult time at the moment, so I'm trying to keep busy and not think about things, but at the same time, it totally destroys my motivation.

The baby is enjoying my lunch right now - very much awake and wriggly!

Whereabouts in London are you WMWG? Sorry if you've mentioned it before. My brain is well and truly fried at the moment!

Sorry to hear you're having a hard time at the mo. Hopefully it'll blow over soon? Try not to feel bad about not being super-productive all the time. I'm the same and I'm used to being really busy and organised so it's hard to get used to just sitting back and doing nothing. I do think it's important to get your rest while you can though...our babies could be coming any time in the next few weeks and I reckon we'll be kicking ourselves for not making the most of our free time while we had it!

Hi Miss B

We're SE London, not far from Greenwich. Are you London too?

I guess you're right about the jobs vs the resting - but on the plus side, the boiler is being mended right now (the part needed is costing over £150...!) and I'm doing battle with the gas and electricity!

I hope it will all blow over soon too, but he seems to be in a fundamental mess about our relationship, and is refusing to see anyone about it, even though he keeps saying he has no one to talk to and can't work out what / why / how he's feeling...

I posted a thread on the 'men's' board and have had some positive feedback, so I'm trying to be positive and supportive and hope for the best.

Anyway...back to Powergen...!!!

I'm also SE London, Greenwich-ish!
errgh, Ive just realised Ive got THE most swollen feet...even though Ive been sitting with them up!! I hope the weather doesnt get any worse, Im not sure I could fit into tnything other than flip-flops!!

Sounds like DH's confusion is the last thing you need right now! Is he having a freak out about becoming a dad or is it about other stuff?

I usually live in NE London but we're now camping out at this flat in N London because it's closer to my mum and the hospital.

Miljo - are you going to QEH then, or Lewisham?

Miss B - no...it's me...he's excited about the baby but unsure about me and him...

My ankles and feet are so much better now I've finished work, I'm pleased to say, but I was only wearing flip-flops for ages too!

Sorry to hear that WMWG

That's really shitty timing on his part!

I know it's not much consolation but you've always got MN if you need to chat (especially now we're all on mat leave and bored out of our brains and glued to the computer all day...or is that just me ?).

Fingers crossed it will blow over and he'll start giving you the support you need soon.

WMWG - Going to QEH - how about you?
Hope everything gets sorted for you and DH - must be really hard for you, so much going on at the moment

Thanks Miss B and Miljo. Can't talk to my Mum as I know what she would say and I have to see if we can sort this out.

Yes - QEH for me too...which midwives are you with? I'm with Sunbury and they're all so nice.

WMWG - Im with Meridian...they also seem really nice!! Have you been to look around the labour ward etc at the QEH?

What would mum say? Leave?

Yes - seen the delivery suite earlier this week and it's fine, but I hated the post natal ward - def not staying any longer than I have to! Have you seen it yet?

Well, yes I think my Mum would tell me to kick him out. But I can't. It might all blow over when he has sorted himself out and I have to give it that chance as I want us to be a family.

WMWG 13th Oct
Stefka 14th Oct
Miss Bumpy & Kittiwake 15th Oct
Miljo 18th Oct
Primigravida 20th Oct

I just got back from the hospital class - it was on problem deliveries so a bit freaky. Found out from one of the other women there that there is another class I am meant to go to but no one told me about it! I called up but it is fully booked. They said they would see if they could slot me in but honestly I feel so cross - I had to nag about the classes I am doing now and I wasn't even told about these other ones!

I used to live in London - I don't envy you guys who are there and having to deal with public transport. I live in Scotland now - much slower pace of life.

Sorry to hear about your probs with DH WMWG - that is the last thing you need. My hubby and I were arguing a lot about the guest. I want him gone he doesn't know how to tell him. He seems to have agreed to talk to him though so fingers crossed he does it soon as the stress is doing my head in.

WMWG, I really hope your DH gets his act together. Sounds like you're being really brave hanging in there. It only takes my DP forgetting to do the washing up for me to start thinking about kicking him out .

Stefka, lucky you living in Scotland. I'd love to be in Scotland right now. Sounds like you're all being really good with your NCT and NHS antenatal classes. I've been rubbish. I booked 3 or 4 NHS classes a few weeks ago but it was when I was still working and I ended up not going to any of them because I was too tired after work. Maybe I'll try to go to a few next week. Are they helpful?

On a more random note, are any of you ladies any good with boilers/heating?! I can't get the hot water to work in this flat and I can't cope with the idea of no hot water!!

I don't know a thing about boilers I'm afraid. Our tumble dryer is broken and I am a bit freaked because we are so going to need it!

I didn't find the hospital classes very good to be honest but I think it depends where you are and who you get. First week we watched an 80's video on childbirth and this week they just read through a sheet on the different pain relief options then scared the shit out of us by talking about forceps etc. Only had one NCT class so far but it was nice. Hope to get more info from them than I did from the hospital.

I just bought a cot - yikes!

Hmm, maybe I won't bother with the NHS classes then. It sounds like a bit of a waste of time.

Well done for getting cot

avoid Active Birth Classes - unable to get on NCT i did them with some pseudo-hippy-guru-and-lentil-munching-unrealistic-tosh-truly-awful
spend you money on chocolate and a crate of wine from majestic for after the baby arrives

You could always go to the first one and see what it is like. I think it varies from place to place. If there is one where you get to see the labour rooms that might be good. Mine are not even in the hospital where I give birth so I don't even get that!

Those classes sound a bit grim scottishmummy! Where in Scotland are you btw? I am in the central belt.

Hi Scottishmummy. Are you due in Oct too?

Maybe I will go to a class next week and then I can decide if I can be bothered with the rest of the classes.

Yes, our NHS ones have been very disorganised with a different person each week, so no one knows what we have and haven't covered.

Miljo - have Meridian been any better?

On the plus side, as ours are run by the midwife team, I have now met 3 more of the midwives who might attend me in labour, which is reassuring.

I agree that the visit to the labour ward has been the best bit, and in terms of the pain relief, birth plans, breast feeding stuff, NCT has been far and away more helpful. Also, we have had great fun! There are 6 couples, and 4 of the 6 boys have the same sense of humour and are very naughty, so the evenings are brilliant, even if we don't cover perhaps as much as we had intended to!

I havent bene to any NHS classes, so WMWG, Im not sure how Meridian team are??

DP and I went to a weekend NCT course, which was really good...very informative etc; would definitely recommend it, but have nothing to compare it too!!

Are you guys writing a birth plan? I asked the midwife about it as I wanted some help and she basically told me not to bother

I was going to write one to take along to discuss with my midwife too and she told me she didn't have time for that kind of thing! Apparently they run a session on Wednesdays when there's a midwife available to talk about birth plans. I've been meaning to do it for ages. I must remember to do it next week...the clock's ticking now!

I think I might do one anyway. Do you have any idea what you are going to put on yours?