Due May 2020 (thread 6)

[sao81]

6th thread already 😬😬😬 not long now

So far my hospital has said essential visitors only which includes one birthing partner. I’m in Canada though so not sure how things will go from here. Really hoping we are over the worst of it by end of May.

i was dreading calling my maternity unit. i rang the antenatal clinic reception to ask if my appointment on 6thapril is cancelled. i was told all appointments are going ahead until the end of this week but possible changes next week and they will let me know. i asked about car parking allowance so i don't need to get on a tube ( cos we meant to be isolating) said no u pay the fee unless u r in labour🙄!
i'm absolutely fed up - childcare/ no cleaner/ no family at all! being pregnant so can't have a good bottle of wine to chill the fuck up🤧🥴🤒.

i work full time by choice so was not planning to be a full time mum while expecting another baby! with no outside help at all🥵 i hate this fucking virus.

I'm not as far along as most of you ladies (due start of July) but still really anxious about what will be going on by then

The plan was my for my 5 year old to go to grandparents but obviously he won't be able to do that. The thought of giving birth alone scares me so much. But there will simply be no choice if you have another child will there.

I think we're in the for the long haul unfortunately.

Would love to keep hearing everyone's updates on appointments and any new birthing rules at hospitals.

We'll always be known as the strong ladies who were pregnant/gave birth during a global pandemic. Stay strong 💪🏼 💐

Sorry to ramble on about my personal life again girls but I've just had a raging row with my ex. He promised me that he would pay off the remainder of some money we lent from my mum to pay for our wedding and pay a certain amount towards our new baby bits. He's just rang me and told me he isn't going to give me a penny towards it so now I'm in about £3000 debt on top of any existing small debts I have. He said that if I can't afford the stuff I have I should send it all back or he will have the baby when he's born as he has what he needs. He said that I'm the reason why he has debt and started being really vile with me again, blaiming everything on me.
He then started threatening childcare once again.

I'm never ever going to be able to sleep after all of this. I'm absolutely heartbroken. I don't think I'm a bar person but I don't know what I have done for one person to destroy me like this. 💔😢

@facevalue the no wine is just the icing on the cake in all of this isnt it! The sooner I can have a gin the better 😂 You'd think the hospitals would be more reasonable with charges considering it is an essential visit. Are taxis a no go for you?
@cookiesandcream24 the way I see the guidance is that people can give support to someone who is vulnerable, so my sister will be having my little girl regardless of the situation as to me it seems essential! Are your parents elderly/at risk? If not I'd say it was fine given the circumstances
@november90 you need to start keeping a log of any contact with him, dates, times, things said etc. That way if/when it goes any further you have evidence to back you up. It says alot about him that he can be so vile to you during pregnancy, but to still carry on with everything going onnat the moment is horrendous!

@cookiesandcream24 I have a 4 year old and no family near me so my little boy will have to go to a friend. I’m sure for the purposes of labour that will be acceptable. There’s no way I’m going through the birth alone, had a traumatic time last time so not a chance I’m doing it without my husband.

@november90 so sorry your ex is still being so nasty. I agree that you need to log every contact as evidence. Hope you managed to get a bit of sleep.

@facevalue all sounds stressful. Can you not just pay the fee this once to save yourself from having to go on the tube? I too will be reaching for an extremely large drink once this is all over and I’m able to!!

@Emmacb82 zone 1 london - last time we paid £100 just to collect me and my DD as they told us not to use public transport 😬 i think in this climate we prefer to try and save money

I thought you were talking about hospital parking fees. What is the £100 for?! They said they were going to stop congestion charges now. I can completely understand why you wouldn’t want to pay that!

You're right girls! I'm going to get a pen and paper out tonight and start printing some things off and logging all this contact. He is so emotionally unpredictable and unstable. I don't need any of this in my life, and if he continues I'll have to think whether that's good enough for my boys too.
I've considered contacting woman's aid as I think he's emotionally abusing me, but at the same time I just want this dust to settle before going into things all guns blazing. I just feel like he's trying to destroy me to make him better.

So sorry you are going through this @november90 I agree a diary sounds helpful.

Just sending a socially distanced hug to all of you. It a been a rough week. My toddler has also decided now is a good time to stop sleeping and have a meltdown when left. I could cry.

We’ve just been informed of latest developments here. Still allowed one birth partner but from same household only and then no visitors whatsoever on the postnatal ward including birth partner. I just hope I don’t have to stick around because the thought of being in hospital on my own with a newborn baby is really overwhelming me

I am trying not to get too worried about hospital arrangements for now - still got almost 2 months until due date and things are changing so quickly, so I'll start thinking more about it in May. Looking forward to the weekend - working from home has not been easy. Enjoy the lovely weather everyone!

Hey everyone, I'm not sure if anyone is off on mat leave yet but this could become relevant to you all at some point.

There is a petition going around to put it to govt to extend paid mat leave due to covid and lockdown etc...

I know my wee one was early so mat leave has started but it could be relevant to a lot of you too. Here is the link.

www.change.org/p/uk-parliament-maternity-leave-extension-covid-19?recruited_by_id=b198caf0-701b-11ea-82f4-0ff77e68de31&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=copylink&utm_campaign=psf_combo_share_initial&utm_term=psf_combo_share_initial

Question for 2nd time mums - roughly how long does the baby stay with size 1 nappies? I understand it varies, but is it more like a few weeks or a few months?

Also would you recommend Pampers Pure nappies? That's all I can get on Amazon at the moment.

@woollycat they aren't in them for very long at all! I think a month tops for my little girl, she was 7lb 1oz born xx

@woollycat we used Pampers last time but the 'pure' brand wasn't available then. We've gone for aldis own version of pure this time, £1 a packet if you can get someone to get them for you

I hope everyone is holding up ok, I'm falling apart myself...

My Grandad has tested positive for the virus. He’s really poorly in hospital and has COPD. He's my only remaining grandparent and has been so excited about our baby, and now I don't even know that he will get to hold him / her.

I can't get my head around any of this. I genuinely just feel lost. I'm getting so depressed and I honestly don't feel excited about our baby coming soon I just feel daunted and so low.

Sorry I know this is a really negative post but I have ranted to you guys before and found your support really helpful.

I'm thinking of you all and wishing and hoping this will all be over soon xxx

Oh my goodness @mrsf1204 I am so so sorry to hear this! Please do not apologise for posting at all! How is your grandad now? When did he get his diagnosis? Sending lots of love and well wishes ❤️ Please chat if and whenever you feel like it xxx

@november90 today. He went into hospital with a chest infection, very causally no blue lights or anything just to get some support as his wife couldn't take care of him (she's also elderly and can't lift him when he falls). They put him on some tablets To try and clear the chest infection but swabbed him on arrival as they do Everyone at the moment and his result came back today. He's now on oxygen feeling awful. The fact none of us can see him and hardly talk to him is breaking my heart. I phoned him earlier and held it together to try and be positive for him but as soon as he kept saying how much he loved me I lost it so we said goodbye and I hung up. I don't know if that will be the last time I talk to him. He could die on his own surrounded by strangers. I just feel absolutely helpless xx

@mrsf1204 sorry to hear about your grandad you must be so worried. My grandparents mean the world to me so I am also so on edge about their health right now! ' Grandparents teach us everything, except for how to live without them ' fingers crossed he will respond well to treatment xxx

@mrsf1204 so sorry to hear about your granddad. Sending you lots of love and hugs. He’s in the right place with the right care, just take one day at a time xx

@mrsf1204 it's so hard because all we hear is the worst case outcomes of this virus, but today I read about a 97 year old with health issues who survived and was out within a week! There will be lots more cases like this, they just don't report it so please don't give up ❤️ I'll keep everything crossed for you and your grandad. I was so close to all of my grandparents, it's so difficult when they are unwell or when that time does come (and I hope this isn't your grandads time!!!!) as they my really are just so precious, but do look after yourself and do whatever you need to do to cope ❤️

@mrsf1204 I'm so sorry to hear that your grandad is so unwell, praying for a recovery for him as soon as possible and sending lots of love to you xxx

Thank you everyone and thank you for the positive story @november20 I need more of those ❤️❤️❤️

@mrsf1204 I'm so sorry to hear that!! This must be such a difficult time. I also saw that story of a patient in their 90's recovering - stay positive. I wish him a speedy recovery..he's in the best place in terms of care x