Due in the New Year - waddling our way past the half way mark

[mixedmama]

Hellooooo there

Neuro - 4 weeks. Our employer will suppliment our maternity income if we state we will return to our normal working hours after M/L. However if we decide to leave or want to come back part time and have accepted the supplimentary M/L pay we have to pay that money back back. Best to check this out, just in case your employer does the same.
Hope that makes sense.

Talking about wieght - I'm going to one of those mothers who look fantastics in a pair of skinney jeans after 2 weeks....

...or NOT. Knowing my luck will take me ages to work it all of....

MrsMcJnr have a look on here:

www.dti.gov.uk/er/workingparents.htm
or
www.acas.org.uk

Motherofz - my mum was down in the pub in hotpants a few days after having me. It was the 70's so i guess not slaggy. Mind you she was a beanpole and i am not. But I am with you on wanting to be in sexy clothes.

I find i'm wearing a lot of baggy clothes now and i hate it.

Having said that, my new Dorothy P jeans are really nice and look trendy and UN-BAGGY!

Same here MrsMcJnr - I don't think they can hold you to 3 months though,according to EU law (I might have made this up). Good luck with the lady garden for your aqua natal class. I'd need a hedge trimmer!

Neuro - I'm probably with you with the weight gain (scales have broken) guess it means the baby's growing!

Toomanyshoes - have a lovely day off. I'm lucky being able to reuse the cute pink things. Will you keep a few things back just in case the scan lady got it wrong? (though if you were like me you would have got them to check 3 times!!)

MotherofZ - i think just over a stone is just fine! x

Oh and i don't think i'll get any extra maternity pay from my employer, not a sausage!
I"m dreading asking to come back two days though, but it's just not worth it financially for me. It works out at working for £1 an hour due to the extra childcare. No way am i going to be away from my baby for a stupid pound an hour!

Topshop do maternity skinny jeans! not sure how comfy they are though....

Took me 9 months to get back to my normal weight (without any stupid diets or strenuous exercise) despite my mum saying 'you'll never go back to your prepreg weight' continuously.

Neuro - i totally agree with you. Its bloody hard enough leaving them let alone only for a £1 an hour advantage. Is there anything you could do at home for money instead? (I'm always after any crazy money making schemes!)

it is quite alarming stepping on the scales, but all in a good cause. Have to say being pregnant is starting to feel like a permanent state.
Aaaaaaaaaages to go yet.

Bettymama - the weight thing, I read a good piece of advice, well, it seemed to make sense to me: 9 months to put it on and 9 months to get rid of it. I think women (and previously fat men as well) who lose it too quickly end up with those folds of skin, despite being very slender everywhere else. I know i can't afford any plasitc surgery, so won't mind taking a while over it.
I am sure a lot of it depends on how lazy one is. I like to get out and have a walk every day, even just for 20 mins, else i get a trapped feeling!

Thanks Neuro This was a useful place too www.dti.gov.uk/files/file34285.pdf I guess it really makes no difference when/if I resign if I am still on mat leave because I?ll still get SMP for 39 weeks and can run my notice whilst on mat leave. They have to entertain your request for flexible working too I honestly can?t bring myself to think about returning to work and leaving my baby with someone else. Our lives and what comes next are so uncertain at the mo that I haven?t had to face it yet. Must at least look at nurseries in case I do have to come back. There?s one next door to my office which is £39/day. Handy but costly.

Just to say according to my employer's policy we would have to pay back a certain amount of our maternity pay if we did not return to work for at least 1 mnth after the leave. With a friend's company it was 3 months, so you need to check your employer's policy small print, Neuro. You could always go back and ride it out for however long you need to and then hand in your notice!

Good point - but if you work for meanies like I do who don't give you a penny more than the basic, they can't moan when they get "stautiry" treatment back!

Angechica - i think the only £ you have to pay back is if if they have topped up your SMP. SMP doesn't come out of the company coffers.

This is my first baby and day cares/nurseries seem a long way off, but the thought of it already makes me feel funny. I've even had daydreams of people dropping him or her or not being kind. I'm going to be a single parent so i have no option but day care.

Am considering moving county so my mum could perhaps do one day a week for me...at least til it was 2 or 3 years old - ie old enough to report back to me verbally about mean carers!

OH I AM SO EXCITED. when i lie on the sofa at the moment i imagine a warm little body snuggling up to me and snuffling in my ear. And then i think i might explode with love. Sorry, very soppy!

Seconded MrsMcJnr. I still cant' believe how f*ing ridiculous maternity pay is. WHAT is the point of me having worked for 20 years and paid all that tax?!! Oh no, i feel a soapbox moment coming on.
I'm moving to my mum's as i can't afford to live on my own. But if i was a scrounger i'd get loads of help!

?statutory? even !

Neuro ? it?ll be ok loads of kids love nursery and they get to spend time with friends and do things we?d (well I?d) never have the patience/ability to do with them! - don?t get me started ? I still can?t believe that we have to pay NI and tax at our usual rate on SMP!

talked with DH at w/e and I am going to take 9 months off and then come back p/t ... I just can't wait - am spending increasing time at work reading on here and doing Facebook.

My mum & MIL both live 300 miles away & so I will have to go for a child minder. After spending some time in the past doing supply-teaching in the odd daycare place I would be far more careful when/if choosing a nursery. Basically the toddlers were fine but the babies cried a lot and couldn't all be consoled at the same time. I found it upsetting.

I know Olver James kept harping on about the same thing in the Observer and I thought it was wrong of him making women feel guilty about their choices. But after seeing it with my own eyes I had to conclude he might have a point.

i know, it's shocking, i've had to redo my budgeting knocking the tax and NI.
Oh no, got to go into our weekly meeting which i regularly beg my boss NOT to have at 4pm on accunt of everyone running out of steam by this time...

typo (altho quite apt!) i meant to write on account.

Anyway, hmmm, yes, babies crying and no one to console them. well no one quick enough.

It'll cost me £35 per day, which zaps all the working tax credit doesn't it?

Neuro - at your typo!

I don't think I am entitled to working tax credit.

Hi all
Porr you Beller that sounds awful

No spots here Mrsmc

Glad you had lovely birthday motherofz although not so great about the sickness bit

beckyau my dp a mortgage broker and deals with solicitors daily and says they the bane of his life !

Me too Gingeme r/e the heartburn i go through dozens of bottles of gaviscon only when pg

congrats on scan fluffymummy.

Hope you had good day off toomanyshoes

Not sure what your company rules are r/e mat pay but i work foe council so pretty standard and you only have to pay money back if you get occupational maternity pay. SMP you get and keep regardless of returning to work. I have to return for 3 months or pay back the occupational pay.

Well off for now as need to bath dc's. Not happy at all to be back at work though and now thinking of finishing after half term which will mean my mat leave starts at beginning of Nov and then with summer hols i will return for the start of the next school year in Sept 2008

I know I am on Annual Leave - but dont want to miss out so GINGEME I am a definite for Pizza Express.

Hey to everyone. Happy Birthday MoZ and Beller you sound better off out of it, lets hope he grows up a bit before the baby is born.

Ooooh helloooooo! Sorry - been away ages for a trial in portsmouth and then weekends away. Took me so long to catch up on all the news now have no time to post as dh and i about to go out to celebrate our 2nd anniversary.

Just to say am definitely up for evening meet on 19th so pls include me.
Beller - you have to sue thru CSA - I have got SO ANGRY on your behalf reading all of his inadequacy.
Poor awen re mouse and poor awen and bettymamma with absent partners - felt for you.
Mrs McJnr am i a regular despite recent long absence - really value this group and want to feel i put in something approaching what i take out?

So glad about all the scans - mine is a week tomorrow and still not intending to discover flava on dh's wishes.

big hugs all round

Excelent barristermum. Thats 6 ladies for the meet up so far from this thread. Cant wait.....
Been feeling bean moving around loads today which has been brill. Ive just had a lovely warm bath and shave(while I still can) and caught sight of my boobs in the bahroom mirror . All I can say is wow!! Never have had boobs this big before. Sorry if TMI but well erm yeah ........
Many Congratulations on your anniversary too
My cousin rang me this evening and tried to trick me in to telling her what sex my bean is. I said DH is having his snip next month(about bloody time) so shes convinced herself Im having a girl or he wouldnt be getting it done. What makes her think Im going to have any more anyway? This one wasn't planned thats for sure

lo Gingeme r/e the boobs thing. Have to say dp very impressed but i spent best part of day pulling up my top at work worried i was showing too much cleavage!
I am also getting loads of movements think baby had hiccups during an inset meeting today and i still despite it being 3rd time love it when i can see my stomach moving.
Dp felt it too on Sat night just trying to catch it for dc's but they haven't patience to hang around and they always go to sleep when you want them to move don't they

Morning all!

Bettymamma - thanks x I have put on around 13lbs, around 10st 5 lb now ..

Toomanyshoes - I fancy seeing that too...just have to drag a mate along now! x

Mrsmcjnr - I have a 3 month notice period too, and also on basic maternity pay, which is 6 weeks pay at 90 pct? then stat pay..so im busy saving up for the time off with lo x

Neuro - I bought a cool pair of black skinny jeans from Top Shop..and they are comfortable x I feel liek that about snuggling up with babybell too xx

Gingme - I will come on 19th sept too! I have a midwife apt on that day locally at midday, but will either come back up for it..or come into work after the appt anyway, ill make it!! Will be good to meet a few people x

Thanks everyone for your thoughts re XP. He didnt turn up again last night..no phone call or text either, so I have decided to wash my hands of him...Im not going to contact him to tell him, in fact im not going to contact him again at all. Next time and /if he calls me, I will say that he has no morals, respect , manners or concience, and that I want nothing more to do with him. He can keep the money he owes to buy a concience..and i hope he sleeps well at night..
I am finding it touch at the moment, but this will be best int he long run to protect babybel and me from wandering in and out of our lives when he fancies! So onwards and upwards
Hope everyone is well xxxxxx