December 2019-Thread 2

[BostonFern]

Kicking off a new thread since the last one if nearly full!

@fonxey and @CourgetteAndCrisps, thank you. I guess everyone is different which is reassuring. I’ve just bought a Doppler which I’m hoping will help over the next 7 weeks until my next scan. Have any of you used one? I know they can be bad news and worry you more but I’m gonna give it a go! X

I was tempted by a doppler but i think midwives and the nhs advise against for 2 reasons:

1. It is hard to find a heartbeat so you could make yourself worry more.

1. You think you do hear a heartbeat but it in fact your own heartbeat or the noise from the placenta which could then lull you into a false security. There was an article a while ago on it.

In the end my anxiety lead me to get a private scan (where i found out gender too) more expensive than a doppler perhaps. But i saw the heart beating!

So I'm not trying to scare you... Just hope you go into it with eyes open. I think personally as someone who suffers from anxiety (i would say it hasn't really effected my pregnancy so much apart from that one night where i almost got a doppler!)

You understandably feel a lot more anxiety over this pregnancy and a doppler may help you retain a feeling of control. But just to be realistic that it shouldn't be a replacement four a midwife if you're ever concerned. I think that they have a lot of experience with worried women and will be able to help.

Didn't mean to lecture! But i was a few taps away from a doppler myself!

Hi everyone, just catching up. My DS has chicken pox and is really suffering so it's been a rough week. Just thought I'd chip in about the Doppler @Laravallence what @fonxey says is right they aren't recommended for the reasons mentioned plus there have also been cases of women being reassured by using a Doppler in later stages when you should be relying on movements and not being checked out for reduced movements.

Saying all of that I have a Doppler 🙈 I used it for my DS and have used it in this pregnancy. I totally get how you are feeling. I've had 3 miscarriages and it's taken me years at a time to get pregnant so I know how anxious it can be. If you do use it I would be aware that it can be difficult even for someone experienced to find the heartbeat at this stage. Also you need to know what you are listening for in terms of your heartbeat, baby's heartbeat and what the placenta sounds like. Im a nurse and do feel confident what I am listening out for but I have been so anxious this week that I ended up going for a private scan as I was convincing myself I didn't know what I was listening for and I needed to be sure. I probably sound crazy now

I hope everyone is doing ok, it's exciting hearing about all the scans and buying stuff!

How old is your DS @NoCupcakesOrCocktails ? My DS is 18mo and has had croup for the past week. It's awful them being sick in this stinking heat.

I had a doppler in my last pregnancy, but sold it last year. I'm glad I did as it never really reassured me. I think I know what my hb, the placenta and the baby's hb sounded like, but I was always worried I'd confused them. Saying that I was really grateful that my midwife used hers at my appt today for reassurance although she found it hard to find the hb herself which kind of backs up my feelings about not buying another home machine.

I've been feeling really rough- it's either a kidney infection or kidney stones. They're treating it for infection but if it keeps coming back or gets worse then it's stones and I'll have to go to the hospital, which I really don't want to do.

Who has had their 16 wk scan? Just had mine and it was utterly useless!

Firstly i keep getting student midwives. That's ok but i kinda wish at the beginning is been asked if i was ok. With it being my first child... i dunno.

Anyway i was really tired today and must have dozed off a bit at the surgery. Not enough to be asleep i was listening to the ding dong that calls pts but not the the very quiet student midwife who basically came out and whispered my name apparently. Anyway i was waiting for 1.5hrs.

And then all i got was a blood pressure and the main midwife just kinda took over from the shy student who was probably feeling bad for having had me waiting for so long. I probably should have got up and asked a bit earlier but anyway. I was half asleep after getting zero sleep.

Anyway kinda feel i have no real continuity because all i see are different students. The last one was ok but this one was so quiet. Probably didn't help her that the main one basically just did everything for her anyway. She'll never learn that way.

No doppler, didn't even get weighed which is what i was looking forward to as i wanted to compare my weight against my scales. I was too tired and pissed off to really all much.

I can't say i really like my mw tbh she didn't sound very interested in talking or the n8ceties and it kinda felt like a waste of time.

I could have taken my bp myself! The only slightly useful bit of info i got is that the antenatal class is run by herself so i guess i know to avoid that one.

@RobinsNest17 my DS is 4, he's been ill since thurs and still getting new spots. We are both sick of being stuck at home. How's you little one doing? Croup is really nasty  I hope the infection settles down

@fonxey that sounds like a rubbish appointment. They should ask you if you want students, I know they need to learn but it's not good for you not to have any consistency especially for a first pregnancy! I'm not a big fan of my midwife tbh either, she is pleasant enough and but she's given me so much incorrect info. She still hasn't fully completed my booking. She referred me for the NT testing but I wasn't eligible and it caused lots of delays at my 12 week scan. I had to wait 2 hours while they got confirmation it wasn't appropriate. She also prescribed me a high dose of folic acid, sent the prescription to my GP but never told me. I found out when I went in for an appointment for my DS after I was 12 weeks that it had been sat there for a month so completely pointless! She also told me I needed to see my GP for a blood test to check my immunity to chicken pox. My friend who's a midwife said that they can test your booking bloods for the immunity and that's standard procedure. She said she had never heard of it yet called me back to say yes I was right. I think that's pretty much it so far! So yeah I've not got much faith in her!

@Laravallence welcome and congratulations!

@fonxey that's a great shot of her waving! I've got an anterior placenta, but apparently it's low, I think I'm feeling flutterings a bit closer to my belly button now though (18+5).

Sorry to hear you've been feeling rough @RobinsNest17 I hope you feel better soon.

@fonxey I had my 16 week appointment a couple of weeks ago- it was also just a blood pressure and urine check with a quick review of what the consultant had said at 13 weeks. A very quick appointment.

Hope you all had a good weekend. I think I must have started nesting, went a bit ott on the housework! Also went to a nearly new sale with my mum, we got some great bargains. I think we spent about £35 between us and got all the clothes pictured below, a fabric sling and a brand new groegg 2 (normally £22 on amazon but I got it for £7, so I was very pleased!). I'd definitely recommend a visit to one of these sales.

The 16 well appt hardly seems worthwhile. Especially waiting 1.5hrs extra! I was hoping to hear a heartbeat or get some other info.

Anyway... Anyone got antenatal classes booked? Don't have any local that's convenient. One of them is mums only. Don't see the point.

I've been looking at post natal classes as well but they are all mum's only too. That annoys me. There's very little support for dads out there i feel, we still seem to treat child rearing as mainly female orientated.

Anyway I'm not sure how if i want to bother. I can learn most from YouTube probably, or a book.

Anyway sorry, I'm just feeling real grumpy today. Real grumpy.

@fonxey most mws don't do the Doppler at 16 weeks as it's so hard to find the hb and it can cause more stress. It's really just a check that you're feeling ok, to chat about any concerns and check your wee and bp.... you'll get a lot of wee and bp checking! Mine also helpfully did the whooping cough vaccine at the same time.

@BostonFern my dh was joking I'd started nesting early, ive had the windows and oven cleaned and on Saturday the front garden annoyed me so I went out and trimmed all the bushes and pulled up the invasion of honeysuckle. I couldn't stand it haha

@foxney mine was a quick appt too just urine check and going over bloods from booking appt,

@codenameduchess how’s it going at work? Does anyone have an inkling do you think or are you finding good things to wear? I planned to tell work today but didn’t seem the right time as was so much else happening but I’m struggling to breath in my work trousers, I need to remove a rib!

@elephantmarch New Look have a sale on at the moment. I got a pair of black maternity work trousers for a tenner each and they are very goo quality (a bit big though, I'm swimming in the size 12 I bought). Bought some other sale items too for off days. I can't go back to normal clothes, I just look ridiculous, as well as feeling uncomfortable.

@elephantmarch I'm sticking with stretchy summer trousers or dresses, with just coming back from an all inclusive holiday i mentioned is gone mad on food and drink 😂 one friend I work with knows and said I looked pretty pregnant but luckily most of the guys don't notice. The job I want us still getting pushed back because my manager is an incompetent idiot though... it's looking less likely it'll happen before I have to tell.

Had my anomaly scan today, baby was not cooperating so we have to go back next so they can check the bits they couldn't see today. It did show I have an anterior placenta and placenta previa (sp?) covering the cervix opening completely so also need extra checks later on to see if it moves up. I'm really hoping it does move as I'd rather avoid a c-section if possible!

Thanks @JayDot500 I’ll have a look. I got a bundle of clothes from eBay but they are all pretty casual except for one occasion-wear dress which is actually going to be quite useful for a family wedding. @codenameduchess that’s frustrating that the manager is being so slow. When I had a restructure In my last role I chose to hide it for 22 weeks whilst the roles were being re applied for and it was just about achievable but I don’t think I could have breathed in for much longer. An all inclusive holiday sounds amazing though!

@elephantmarch Have you tried bump bands? They have been quite useful for me the last couple of weeks. I don't think I'm sucking it in anymore 😂😂 most of the people I see day to day are men who are lovely but not the most observant, and my manager is so self absorbed she wouldn't notice if I have birth in front of her. It's just a shame I'll almost definitely be leaving the company after mat leave because of her as there won't be another chance to progress.

@NoCupcakesOrCocktails you sound so poorly I hope you get better soon xxx I’d def cos I’ve had the miscarriages and I have a bicornate uterus that I’m so worried this time as never had a successful pregnancy! I’ll try the Doppler ( against advise I know!) and book in a private scan if I worry myself!

@fonxey my midwife is crap too as feel your pain! She couldn’t even take my blood!! In the end she tried from my hand and still couldn’t so I had to walk around with a bruise that covered my entire hand all week and she still didn’t get any blood!!! I have my 16 week next week and then the obstetrician appointment the day after ( hoping they will take a scan at the my uterus as I’m high risk but I have read they don’t even do that!!!! I’m not even sure what the shape of it looks like as was found at 5 weeks pregnant!

Generally feeling the tiredness, had to do a 7 hour presentation at work yesterday and then drive 4 hours home, I was nearly crying I was so grumpy and tired!! Could have killed my boss who knows I’m pregnant!! Going to have a moan at her today!! 🤣 I just want to cuddle up and nest now!!! Xx

Oh and @codenameduchess I have been wearing my work trousers unzipped with a cammy top of a baggy top over and suit jacket!! I haven’t told anyone apart from my boss, mum and one friend so I think everyone just thinks I’m fat!! I’ve put on a stone and a half since I got married but prob cos I was very skinny when I get married and now I eat everything!!! Xx

19 weeks yesterday! Whoop, I'm so anxious to get my anomaly scan out the way, I just need to know our boy's ok. I feel like I've read loads of stories on here recently about people getting such horribly sad news at these scans and it's got me very freaked out.

Just thought I’d update you, Doppler arrived and I found the heartbeat within 10 mins! Sounded like a train! I feel so much better and hubby got hear too! Can’t believe it worked as I know normally ppl hate them! And I’m only 15 weeks, feeling very blessed xx

Ooh everyone's progressing so well!

I would secretly love a Doppler @Laravallence but so far have resisted...

I have been able to feel movement for about a week now so that's giving me reassurance.

I had a scary episode this week where I fainted. Had never fainted before. I was in an extremely hot room so I think I just overheated but gave myself a fright.
Also have lots of aches as my bump expands, I guess more round ligament pain. Makes for uncomfortable sitting and lying down...

That aside all good here, also nervous about my anamoly scan like you @smartcarnotsosmartdriver but it's in my 21st week and still another 2.5 weeks away 😬

@Laravallence glad the Doppler worked and gave you good reassurance. I think I need to find a better guide about how much weight I should put on, I think I’m relaxing too much and eating a lot as I know there’s no hope of looking thin now! @smartcarnotsosmartdriver what sort of things are worrying you? Don’t google as it’ll only play havoc with your imagination

@agteacht gosh. Did you feel yourself about to faint? Make sure you’re drinking lots and don’t go crazy in the heat.

@elephantmarch this is helpful

https://www.calculator.net/pregnancy-weight-gain-calculator.html

Although I am at the high end of it and it stresses me out

Yea I felt myself about to faint but had never fainted before so didn't realise what was happening, thought I was going to throw up! Will know if it happens again!! Apparently mid second trimester your blood pressure is low, if google is to be believed anyway...

@agteacht hope you're feeling better! I've not fainted but have felt insanely woozy recently. I seem to have woken up with a nasty cold today, so I think mines a combination of 2nd tri blood pressure and feeling run down.

On the plus side I find out the gender of bump today! I'm so excited it's insane - I woke up at 6am 😂

@CourgetteAndCrisps ooooooo. Well if your mumsnet name is based on a craving it can’t be a boy, as they don’t eat courgettes. So a girl?

@elephantmarch perhaps it's because I'm vegan, but it looks like this little boy loves a courgette 🥰😂

Can't wait to meet him! Here's a couple pics - he's got his tongue sticking out in the 4D one.