35+ TTC #1 Graduates!

[Kescilly]

This thread is for those of us over 35 who are pregnant with our first! It’s a continuation of a great group of people from the TTC thread. Doesn’t matter how far along you are, come on in!

I've been struggling a bit this week with tiredness and indigestion again ☹️

We've got the Harmony test on Tuesday so will be having a scan before that. I'm starting to feel a bit anxious about it as we'll find out then if it's actually progressing and I can't block it out of my mind about those poor women who have had MMC... I'm worrying more about that I think than the outcome of the test itself.

Sorry to put a bit of a downer on the thread. Hope everyone else is well and looking forward to the ling weekend!

@pinkywoo the 16w appointment is a bit of an anticlimax in my opinion.

@weathergirl1 the tiredness and indigestion suck. Hopefully you will get a reprieve soon.

34w today for me had midwife appointment today measuring spot on. Have had a slight worry earlier this week with reduced movements went in for ctg monitoring and all fine and follow up growth scan on Wednesday she is measuring right down the middle and is estimated to be approx 4lb 7oz again right where they expect. She is currently breech but they and the mw today don't seem concerned she has time to turn.

@Blondcat glad everything looks good for you at the moment, can’t wait until I’m that far along!

@weathergirl1 ugh - I’m so tired too and was awake with heartburn last night so feel your pain. Hope it dies down soon. Out of interest (more through my own ignorance about this and not having researched) did you have to pay for the Harmony test or is it now on the NHS? I’ve read a couple of things but my midwife didn’t mention it to me last week.

@Kescilly - thanks for the welcome! Totally understand the history behind this chat, hope you don’t mind a late-coming intruder :)

I’m currently in France and my partner and his uncle have decided that they want to crack on with sorting out the garden (the uncle owns the house over here). So I’m siting inside, bored and cold. The comment earlier was “well, if it rains and we have to come in then I suggest we go up to the restaurant in the square and have some oysters and white wine!”.

Yes. Because I can do both of those things.

This is after them managing to get through two boxes of red wine so far (we only arrived Thursday afternoon), and just not getting that I can’t eat all the cheese or the salmon that he inexplicably keeps offering me, and my partner asking me (twice now) to pop out and buy him cigs from the shop with money that we’ve taken out of our joint account. Am I being really unreasonable to be cross about that?!?!

Raaaagghhhh sorry, rant over.

I’m not this mardy all the time!

@Blondcat have you looked at the Spinning Babies site? I looked at all sorts of things like that before taking the plunge (even though not currently relevant!) - I was breech myself (sorry mum!).

@Pinkywoo will be interested to hear about the 16w appt. Isn't that the one for only 1st timers?

@LauraLooDerby no not on the NHS, we're paying to go private (it's £500 where we are but that includes a scan before to check viability & if there's a problem you don't pay the Harmony bit). As far as I'm aware, the only way you can get it on the NHS is if you do combined screening first and get what they determine to be high risk. I wasn't prepared to do that as it wasn't worth the stress to my mental health (I think they determine 1:150 as high risk, but I wouldn't be reassured by that myself - there's a poster on the antenatal testing board currently really stressed by a result which is higher than you'd expect for her age (28) but NHS wouldn't do further investigation as she's lower than 1:150). If you haven't read it yet, get yourself a copy of Emily Oster's Expecting Better. It deals with the the risk factors around various advice given to pregnant women and enables individuals to make their own informed decisions. I was really quite annoyed by the leaflet I was given regarding NHS screening as I don't believe it provides enough information for an individual to make a proper informed decision (sorry, you triggered me into full on rant mode! 🤣).

No advice I'm afraid about your OH and OH's uncle but sounds like the uncle is being a bad influence! I don't think you're being unreasonable - hope he snaps out of it 🤞

@Pinkywoo exciting! Well, not the jab, that one hurt a bit. Hope it goes more smoothly for you! Are you looking forward to the 20 week scan though?

@Weathergirl1 I’m a bit behind, did you have your scan and Harmony test today? I hope it all went well. I think a bit of anxiety is totally normal, don’t worry about being a downer. We’re all here to support each other.

Glad you got some reassurance @Blondcat! We went in yesterday for reduced movements as well. I was hesitant all day but there’s always that “What if?” I’m the back of your mind. Will they keep checking if baby is breech? I do wonder how much any of that positioning stuff makes a difference like people say. I think the NCT instructor told us to sit on birthing balls, or do things on all fours. Well, I recline when I sit down and baby has been head down for weeks! I think they do what they want to.

@LauraLooDerby I don’t even drink much and I’ve still been jealous when my husband can have something I can’t! I think you should treat yourself to something delicious.

Well, I’m 36+6 today and had my 36 week appointment. We are skipping our last NCT class tonight because I’m just exhausted and need a break. I’ve had so many appointments, have been in the hospital for something or other almost every other day, and I’m going back tomorrow.

Everything seems fine, but the baby is big. So the doctors were talking induction or c-section. I originally booked an induction for 39 weeks, but after coming home and reading studies with my husband, we decided on a c-section. So I have one planned for May 28th, when I’ll be 39+6. They want to get me in sooner and if anything opens up from 39 weeks on (May 22), they’ll call!

Meanwhile I think I need to go revise the clothes I wanted to wear afterwards and find some dresses and high waisted clothes. And larger clothes for our baby!

Hello everyone! I'm just back from my Harmony appointment this evening. Well it's all feeling a bit real now we've seen a baby with a heartbeat on the ultrasound! The consultant measured me at 11+1 which is 2 days on from NC's date but I thought I'd actually ovulated a day ahead of that anyway so I'll take it - and proves the LMP date was silly as I knew anyway so feeling smug about that 😁. He said the nuchal measurement was normal so wasn't worried about that, then we went through the Harmony stuff before I had my bloods taken...

I now feel like a pin cushion. The nurse managed to get one vial out of my left arm, but then it stopped so she moved on to my right arm. That really didn't want to do anything so the consultant joined in. I had another attempt at my right arm and then they ended up using a butterfly needle on the top of my right hand 😱. For someone who really doesn't like needles this was not the experience I was hoping for! I went all shivery and they sat us in a side room to recover before I left (they were really lovely about it though). My DH gave me a cuddle and said that there was no rush to leave and just after he finished saying that my Garmin watch vibrated and told me to move - it couldn't have timed it better 🤣

The lab had better manage to get the DNA on this test as I really don't want to have to go through that again next week if they want another sample 😬. The earliest we should hear by is Monday (apparently today and tomorrow aren't working days at the lab!), but we're encouraged that he didn't seem worried about the nuchal measurement.🤞

@Kescilly well that sounds all quite exciting that you now have a date (even if it moves a bit nearer). I know everyone's experiences are different but I have a couple of friends who have had elcs and they found them a good experience and recovered really well. I don't think I could agree to induction myself although I do know someone who was induced at 38 weeks for a large baby and she got through it mostly unscathed (she says he's a whopper now at nearly two!)

How have you found the NCT classes? Curious really as I've heard mixed things about them. I'm not sure I could feel comfortable discussing birth related stuff in a group face to face but I know most people say that they're great for making new parent friends.

@kescilly I thought I had replied testator but it appears it didn't go through for one reason or another! I have been told midwife with check suspected position next week (36w) and if still believed to be breech they will be sending me for another scan to check. At that point they will discuss my options (manual turning and /or elcs).

Not had any antenatal classes yet they seem to leave it a bit late here... Got free one at the hospital breastfeeding tomorrow and normal one Saturday. Then got intensive nct course next weekend the whole weekend. May finally feel ready then for baby to arrive.

@birdbybird just wondering how you're getting on? I think the iron is finally kicking in for me now (3 weeks of supplements should be about right if it's triggering me making more haemoglobin) and I woke up this morning actually wanting to get outside and do some exercise - which is something I haven't felt for probably well over a month now!

@Melamine you must be quite close by now?

Hello all. I was on the TTC group in the second half of last year but then have taken some time away from MN. I came back on as I was wondering how a lot of you got on - @kescilly, @blondcat and @melamine - not long to go!! Nice to see lots of BFPs on here.

We got our BFP in Feb but then had an early loss at 5.5 weeks. Had one period and then a second BFP which, fingers crossed, is sticking so far. Only 8 weeks today and have our early scan today so will hopefully see the hb x

Hi @oxted2018 and congratulations on the bfp fingers crossed for your scan today.

Yup I am 35+1 today so getting close now eeek. Really looking forward to meeting our little girl (who is making herself known as I type wriggling about probably from the naughty pain au choc and raisins I have just had for breakfast).

@Weathergirl1 thanks for checking on me... think I am 10w1d today and have had a pretty bad 3 weeks. I basically haven't left the bed/house in this time except to once go to the doctor which was hard enough... On the worst day I threw up about 6 or 7 times. That happened only ones mind you....most days it was 1, 2 or 3. I'm slightly higher than the Emily Oster average of 6 days of vomiting... I think I've had about 10 vomit days during this time. But the nausea, feeling digestively-challenged and tiredness is debilitating. I'm gearing myself to go for a 30 minute walk to tennis today (I may just watch DP play) and 30 minutes walk back.... not sure if I can make it and if I'll turn back half way, but am just sick of the bed /watching rubbish tv to distract myself.

@Kescilly and @Blondcat am getting excited for you both!

BTW @Pinkywoo great news on the scan!
And @Weathergirl1 a tentative congratulations on the scan.

Hi @Oxted2018 - and welcome!

@babybird sorry you are feeling so shite. If it makes you feel any better I felt my worst for a couple of weeks around your dates and then started to feel a little better around the 12w mark and much better two /three weeks after that. It feels like it goes on forever at the time though so sympathise and hope it clears for you soon.

First lot of antenatal classes now done so feel a bit more prepared and if she came now we would be more or less ready and she should be fine hopefully with very little medical assistance.

Hope everyone is doing well.

Update from me I am on an antenatal ward since 2am yesterday due to high BP and trace of protein found in my pee at my 36w mw appointment on Friday. Scan yesterday shows baby is in transverse position (which after 37w means risk of cord prolapse) so the two combined mean here until delivery unless she moves and bp under control. I have a side room and being well looked after so know we are in the best place we can be.

Oh no, I'm sorry to hear that @blondcat. But it is good you are being closely monitored and , as you say, you are in the best place. Have you now had to start mat leave earlier than you had planned?

All okay here. Had our private scan 9 days ago and all looked good and fx the heartbeat looked strong. I actually had a little cry! Am obviously blaming pregnancy hormones!! 12 week scan is booked for 3 weeks today and we are off on holiday on Weds until the day before the scan so that will keep me distracted. Although we are going to Japan so I need to be careful with the sushi....

Hope everyone is doing well x

@oxted2018 glad to hear your early scan went well. Yes may leave had now started was on slowing down for next two weeks before calling it a day so not too early. Bp seems to be under control just waiting on a presentation scan to see if she has moved as may be able to go home if both are favourable. Would be nice to go home but am scared she will move again and I am at risk if I am at home just need to wait and see what the doctor says and what the scan shows.

Sounds like you've had a scary time @Blondcat, fingers crossed the scan is good news

@Blondcat good to hear you're being looked after...

@Pinkywoo how did your 16 week appointment go... did I miss your update?

@Oxted2018 glad to hear your scan went well...

@Kescilly how are things at your end?

@Weathergirl1 how are you feeling?

I'm 11w2d today... just vomited again a few minutes ago after a gap of 4 days.. thought I was over it but seems not yet... have been alternatively having cocoa puffs with almond milk, bananas and orange juice all day today. It's been the least gross tasting vomit I've ever had.

Well, I went for my dating scan today.... and they sent me home, with a new date to come back a week on Thursday!

Apparently I was only measuring exactly 11 weeks. So they want to wait and do it properly when I'm over 12 weeks.

At least I saw the scan, and the heartbeat, and the lady said there were two arms and two legs! So I guess that's a good thing at least!

But more to wait until I get the actual scan and photos (which they charge £5 each for, wtf?!)

Glad to hear everyone seems to be doing ok. Hope it's good news wrt the position @Blondcat and younger to go home. I can't imagine how I'd feel stuck in hospital (I really don't do well in medical settings).

Sorry to hear the sickness hasn't gone away @birdbybird but it sounds like it is improving if you've had a run of days without any. 🤞 It's a blip today.

We got the Harmony results back and are 1/10,000 (best possible) risk for all three trisomies, so that's good news. But I'm struggling a bit mentally this week and have been avoiding MN. I don't know if it's because I'd been putting all the other stuff to the back of my mind until we knew what the results were and now we have a good result, I'm now facing the prospect of it all actually being a thing. I don't now, I just don't really know how i feel. We've got the NHS dating scan in the morning and in all honesty I just don't want to go. Sorry, I'm rambling now and I don't want to put a complete downer in everyone else. 😟

@LauraLooDerby looks like we are close... I've not had a scan yet but I think I'm 11w2d.

@Weathergirl1 aww hugs. This pregnancy business is an emotional rollercoaster. My scan is a week and 2 days from now. Rightly or wrongly we've decided to have the NHS scan and then as part of that for a fee the hospital can submit bloods for a cell-free dna analysis (which I think is the same as the Harmony). Don't even know yet if there's a heartbeat... so am just assuming for now the nausea means its hanging in there.

Hi everyone, sorry I’ve gone a bit quiet. Everything’s going fairly well with baby. She’s just huge and I’m spending a lot more time lying down because she’s so heavy. I took my fourth glucose test and haven’t heard anything today so I’m assuming they still haven’t diagnosed me with GD. I had my last appointment with the midwife today at 38+6 because I have a c-section booked a week from today. Even the midwife said she doesn’t blame me!

I’ve been struggling a bit because my dad’s been ill and in the hospital and I haven’t been able to go back and see him. He and my mom were supposed to come out and stay, but obviously that’s not happening now. So I feel like a lot has changed in the past few weeks. I’m worried about him and I’m now looking at recovering from surgery without the support we thought we’d have here.

I know we’ll manage, I just feel a lot more withdrawn and less excited given I have a week till I meet my baby.

That sounds tough @Kescilly, it's always hard when you have everything planned then something changes at the last minute. Just try and rest, and I hope your dad is better soon

@birdbybird you didn't miss my update, I missed the appointment! I had a severe attack of baby brain (or blondeness) and only remembered when it was too late to get there, fortunately they were very nice about it but can't fit me in until 20 weeks. It's actually the day after my scan and consultant appointment so at least we'll have something to talk about!