35+ TTC #1 Graduates!

[Kescilly]

This thread is for those of us over 35 who are pregnant with our first! It’s a continuation of a great group of people from the TTC thread. Doesn’t matter how far along you are, come on in!

@Weathergirl1 yeah, it’s fairly rare so I’m sure you’ll be fine! Honestly, it’s still in the back of my mind, as although we were deemed low risk by the NHS, the numbers didn’t look great. No one has noticed anything at any scans, and my fears have sort of moved on. Too many other things to worry about! We took the refund and used some of the money to pay for a gender scan on a Christmas Eve instead, which was really nice.

I don’t think I ever bothered telling the midwife when I ovulated! I think the main thing would be to make sure you get your dating scan/NT test done in the right timeframe. My dates moved ahead something like a week and my baby is measuring something like two weeks ahead now anyway.

Kescilly, due May 29th
Blondcat, due 14th June
Weathergirl1, due November 28th/December 3rd
Melamine, due May 17th (though I am going with the due date being a myth thing so I'm basically due any time between April 26th and May 31st haha)

I am also having a large baby apparently, despite ovulating late so I got my due date adjusted forwards at dating scan, then have consistently measured huge. I've had 2 growth scans and the second one showed her not quite so huge so now I have to have a third in case of growth reduction 🙄 never plain sailing is it!?

@Melamine I had a growth scan showing a large baby, so I have my second one at the end of the month. I was hoping that baby would show up as less massive but I didn’t think about how that could be a bad sign!

I’m also worried they’ll make me do a fourth GTT, although obviously if there’s a risk of GD I’d rather know than not know.

Kescilly, due May 29th
Blondcat, due 14th June
Weathergirl1, due November 28th/December 3rd
Melamine, due May 17th
birdbybird, due 6th/7th/8th December

@Kescilly Husband is now reading the Emily Oster book. Thinks we should do a Harmony test if we can.

Hey guys, I have been not feeling myself, a bit of nausea/indigestion here and there but that's all forgotten as am so angry right now and just need to vent somewhere. Told my mother the news exactly a week ago. I'd hesitated to tell her and now I know why. Even though I told her to not mention this to anyone, she has gone and told a family friend and his wife. The family friend's wife is suffering from a recurrence of cancer and is having treatment, and my mother thought it was 'good news' and would make her 'feel better'. WTF????

Oh no @birdbybird ! I'm not sure what to say. Have you had words with her about it? I think I'd be asking why she thought her friend's feelings were more important than your wishes. We told my parents early on so I could have support but the only person they've told (which I don't mind because he's close family and told them I was ok with them telling him) is my Grandpa who practically lives with them - and he's now not even discussing it with them so that he doesn't inadvertently bring it up in conversation with someone he shouldn't (I love the logical thought my family has!).

I got my blood results back yesterday and I'm low/borderline under on hgb and hct (and I was probably a bit dehydrated because I was struggling to drink much last week so that would mean they are even worse) - which was interesting because I had a full blood count a year ago and my levels then were good. I did feel totally wiped though yesterday after my session on the bike (legs were like lead even during it!) so we think this must be the reason... I've been to get iron tablets this morning so hopefully that will help.

Oh and I don't have HIV or syphillis 🙄 so I guess that is good news 😁

@Weathergirl1 I lost my cool on the phone to her and then ended the call, so there was no 'resolution' as such. She lives on the other side of the world, so I'll avoid contact until I feel better. I told her for the same reasons ... for support. She does tend to get 'carried away' with the moment.
I think you said you were an only. I'm one of three, and this proves the case for one child... as you seem to have a much healthier relationship with your parents than I do!

Aw @birdbybird one datum does not prove a causal link! Although I'm happy with the only one thing myself, I actually think family dynamics are more to do with the people involved than how many of them there are IYSWIM? My DH has a younger brother who we're fairly non-contact with (long story but appears to be a one-sided competition with him that we refuse to engage with!) although we do send Christmas and birthday cards, etc. My FIL was also an only and claims that's the reason why he didn't want my DH to be an only... Well, look how that turned out 🤪!

🤞 Your DM will see her error and contact you to apologise 💐

Hello, can I join? I am 5+6 today with my first, via a second round of ICSI after TTC for almost 2 years. We had MFI (hence ICSI) and after one failed round discovered I also have endometriosis and adenomyosis. So I am thrilled to be pregnant but also terrified of MC as I am high risk.

I am 36.

I wasn't on the TTC thread because I was doing IVF so kept to ones about that instead.

Also despite obviously being desperate for a baby I have that feeling in the back of my head that if it wasn't for biology I would probably have waited another ten years! Only met my OH three and a half years ago so more than half our time together has been very focused on TTC... Which has been a lot less fun than I thought it would be before we started!

@Thund4rcat of course you can join! Welcome! I know what you mean about wishing for more time. I had wanted a baby since I was 25 but then my marriage broke up and it made me feel less secure in so many ways. I knew I’d want a child again when I remarried but we were back and forth on TTC mainly because of me.

I’m pleased that you’ve had your BFP and hope that we can support you through your pregnancy.

@birdbybird I’m sorry that your mom completely disregarded your wishes like that. How’s your nausea? Are you feeling any better after the long weekend?

@Weathergirl1 how are you doing? I’ve started taking iron tablets as well (though it was an ordeal to get them because the pharmacist wouldn’t give them to me).

@Kescilly Long weekend wasn't great. Spent most of it in bed. Don't know how I managed the gym class on Sunday morning. I did pick up some vitamin B6 tablets. Took one yesterday and felt slightly better afterwards. Although still no word on mid-wife appointment so not sure what they'll say about the B6. Its a higher dose than in the Pregnacare tablet. What issue did the pharmacist have with the iron tablets? How are you feeling otherwise?

Hi @Thund4rcat !

Hello @Thund4rcat ! You're definitely welcome. We're not generally as chatty here as some of the other anti-natal threads so be reassured we weren't ignoring you! I actually like the fact the thread doesn't move ridiculously quickly as it means I can actually keep up with everyone 😁

@Kescilly I'm feeling a LOT better thank you! DH took me to the pub on Thursday evening to feed me up on steak and I think the iron tablets are starting to kick in now. I got 14mg ones from Wilko (internet search discovered that was the cheapest option, Asda was going to be my 2nd choice) which is the same dose as in Pregnacare. What was the dose the pharmacist wouldn't sell you? I'd just get them from the supermarket if you need any more. My mood is better now I'm back exercising again - I was feeling awful about having no energy to do anything so we went for some long walks on Friday, Saturday and Sunday evenings which got my step count up even if I wouldn't normally consider that proper exercise! I do feel somewhat relieved that I was able to find out about this now rather than wait until the next midwife appointment as that isn't until after the scan which is a month away - I hate to think the state I'd be in if I was weak and unable to do any exercise for another month! I guess most people aren't as in tune with their bodies if they're not used to doing regular training, but I still can't help but think it's bad to have such a delay in blood test results as standard 🙄

@birdbybird I think the recommendation is 25mg up to three times per day for sickness and yes, agree it's a lot higher than in Pregnacare. Think I saw someone mention breaking up 100mg tablets into quarters over the weekend when I did a bit of lurking (can't remember which board that was on though). If you're feeling really tired, I wonder if you're also low on iron? We figured that taking the dose in Pregnacare was safe as the GP seemed to think that was the go to supplement for everyone.

The hospital wanted me to take 200 mg of ferrous sulphate twice daily since I’m pregnant. Pharmacist didn’t want to sell them to me because I’m pregnant! So I had a GP appointment and she prescribed six weeks worth for me.

@birdbybird I’m glad the tablet gave you a little pick up. I hope they continue to do so!

I’m feeling exhausted for no reason today. I even slept six hours last night which is highly unusual for me. Had my 34 week appointment today and then I have a growth scan next week.

@Weathergirl1 I think you're roughly a week ahead of me so the fact that you feel a lot better gives me hope. Are you doing your own vitamin combo rather than the Pregnacare? I bit the bullet and bought a Pregnacare pack yesterday. I may be low in Iron as have not taken any supplements in about a week ... I stopped taking it when I started feeling queasy.
Did/do you take the extra vitamin B6? I only took the one 50mg tablet yesterday... didn't think about splitting it in two. Haven't taken any today - I suppose due to worry of potential side effects - the bottle says 'helps to balance hormones and reduce tiredness and fatigue'.

How are you guys finding managing your day jobs along with this?

For those taking pregnacare not sure if this helps but, boots and wilko so their own brand tablets which appear to me now or less the same and are much cheaper i think wilko are about £2.50 for 30 and boots are £3.79 for 30. If you join boots parenting club they give you some for free and I managed to get another pack for free via the app so only actually paid for a couple of packs. (Emma's diary packs gave a 7 day free sample of pregnacare) I didn't take any of these until into second trimester as didn't dare join any clubs etc after my early mc just took folic acid and vitamin d (and b6 when nausea got worse) in the first part.

Thanks @Blondcat - thats really useful info!

Ah @kescilly so you're not going to get that type of Iron from the supermarkets!

@birdbybird I've just been taking my own vitamins and fish oil (non Vit A containing) as I was already taking C, D, Zinc and B12 for other health reasons. I was also on methyl folate rather than folic acid and most multivitamins only contain folic acid so I didn't really want to stop (methyl version is easier for the body to use as it doesn't have to do anything to it first. For most people this is fine, but I've had an underlying health issue that I was trying to sort out which is why I went with the methyl version!). I am 9+0 tomorrow according to NC and I am sat here waiting for nausea to properly hit me. I can't believe I will escape unscathed given how ill my poor DM was with me (she had sickness right from finding out until the morning I was born)... I keep wondering if there's something odd going on 😬

Embarrassingly I don't have a day job to cope with (currently being a housewife - left my last job a few years ago effectively due to constructive dismissal and haven't sorted out what I'm doing yet - various family issues got in the way and then we decided to TTC) however I don't know how I would cope if I had to go to work so I am very grateful for that and admiring of those of you who do. The housework and other stuff I'm in charge of doing is not properly happening at the moment 😳

@Blondcat isn't Wilko great?! I am definitely all about the own brand pharma. I only ever get my paracetamol from there as the cheap Boots ones are circular tablets (whichy DH refuses to use) and they charge more for the caplets, whereas at Wilko the caplets are just as cheap! Also Bell's ranitidine is only 95p for a box of 12 whereas Zantac is more like £4 for the same number 🤑

Oh realised I didn't answer about B6! I was taking 100mg but stopped after the GP said not to take higher doses than Pregnacare 🙄 given I've not really been feeling sick (it's more indigestion I've had) I haven't done anything else about it yet. If I do feel sick though I will probably have a look at it again.

I'm taking the seven seas pregnancy vitamins, which are about three pounds from savers, plus extra vitamin D. My morning sickness has finally finished now (yay!) and I'm feeling less knackered but still struggling a bit at work. I work in an old pub with uneven stone floors and random steps, and am on my feet all day for five days a week, there's no way I'll be working up to my due date!

Oh I got the results of the 12 week screening back, and it's 1/1597 for Downs and 1/10000 for Edwards and Patau, so no further tests needed which is reassuring, I thought it would be worse considering my age.

Due 24th of October

Had my early scan today, thought I was 6 weeks 2 days, but I'm 6 weeks 6 days! All fine and saw heartbeat 😄😄

Hello! I'd love to join this chat please!

I'm 35, currently 7+5 I think (!). Never been on one of these chat sites before so I don't know any of the fun acronyms or anything but there we go.

All a bit weird, this 'being pregnant' malarky. We weren't not trying, but certainly thought it'd take longer than it did. So when the test came back, it was more shock and "ooooh bugger, it's actually happening" than being over the moon. And since then I'm just generally miffed that I can't do things, especially since it's not "real" yet - I've not had a scan or anything, got my first midwife appt next week - so at the moment it's just stopping me doing things that I love in life, like red wine, the occasional ciggy, delicious cheese and pate, and rare steaks!!

Anyway. I'm sure it'll get more exciting when it gets 'proper'. Luckily no nausea, just very VERY sore boobs and I'm pooped the whole time, and actually - some cramping (sometimes quite severe?) and a bit of gross (TMI?!) discharge. But I think it's all still ok.....?!

Anyway - nice to meet you all, sorry for the essay!!
x

@LauraLooDerby welcome!!! I could have written your post... love our carefree life but know that we want kids in the future, just got married in September last year and thought we'd start TTC as we would like to be preggers towards the fall when all our friends weddings and our annual trips are out of the way, OBGYN said could take about a year because I'm 35, so we tried and got pregnant second cycle!

I'm going abroad for my friends hen do next month, month after 2 weeks holiday abroad and another holiday in August 🤦🏻‍♀️ we are obviously happy but gobsmacked it happened so quickly, and I just can't believe I won't be able to drink wine (I'm a bit wine drinker, love my my wine!) or eat steak (wouldn't have it well-done, disgrace!) for 9 months lol. I know this is trivial and I almost feel ashamed saying it!

I think when you're 35+ you just are quite set in your ways and enjoy the freedoms, but my argument is that I'd never feel ready if it wouldn't just happen like this.

Excited for your first scan... I saw heartbeat yesterday at 6 weeks 6 days so it feels a bit more real now!

@SunStruck thanks!

I think you're right - we've got to this age with freedom and holidays and doing whatever we want whenever we want, so to have that taken away is a bit of a shock.

It's good to know that I'm not alone in thinking that way! And yes - similar situation - going to France next week for a holiday, my fiancé's family are over from South Africa in June for two weeks so we're travelling a bit around the UK, and then going to Singapore in July with work (but was going to tag a break on the end), and a friend's 30th in Galway in September... which I'm actually going to bow out of, seeing as the whole point of it is to go and get drunk in Ireland.

I don't know. I feel very ungrateful, when I have friends who have been trying for years with no success. I'm sure I'll be more excited soon!

And less whingy.... christ have I been a whingy cow recently!

Lots of good news here so far! Congrats @Pinkywoo and @SunStruck on your good results!

@LauraLooDerby welcome to the thread and congrats on your pregnancy! I think many of us understand the mixed feelings. I’ve wanted a baby forever and still had mixed feelings about getting pregnant.

Just a heads up, a lot of us on here are following from a thread in the Conception forum. It was for ladies who were over 35 and trying to conceive (TTC) their first child. We didn’t want to clutter it up with posts about our pregnancies when people were still TTC, but we wanted a way to continue the support. It’s not a prerequisite that you were on that thread with us, I just didn’t want you to feel like you had missed something!

Please let us know if you have any questions about all the shorthand used on these types of forums.

How's everyone doing? I've got my 16 week midwife appointment next week so should get my whooping cough jab, and then next is the 20 week scan, exciting!