September Babies Thread #5 - we're a chatty bunch

[Stroan]

Yet another thread for our September babies!

The Google Doc with stats is here: docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1VUDuTLeibUnnaCWCjb-pqUe4Wnq-fTau4HJgmE1XE3c/edit?usp=sharing

This post was edited at OP's request

We're having a girl, found out last week.

I'm working right up, pretty much- I'm due Wednesday 25th and assuming it all goes to plan my last day will be the Friday before. I have an easy enough commute (30mins by car, five minute walk) and have the option to work from home which I will probably do a lot more of towards the end.

To go back to the maternity/paternity leave convo. Aviva announced yesterday that they increased their pat leave to 6 months full pay. 2 other companies this week have also increased paid time off, as well as their enhanced maternity packages. I'm using this info to go back to my large company already reviewing things to try and get them to hurry it up. If anyone has a HR department, it's worth mentioning to see if they can review things like alot of other companies seem to be doing.

I'll be finding out gender at the 20 week scan, I'll be nearly 21 weeks then.

I work from home but in a project based role which is busy and will be high stress and long hours in the last few weeks. I am supposed to be in Europe the week before in due to launch the project (obviously I won't be) so hoping to work until at least 38 weeks. I haven't told them I'm pregnant yet and won't until after the 20 week scan. I feel very anxious about telling them as hugely concerned they may terminate my contract as I am supposed to be running and launching this project.

I'm freelance so don't really know where I stand legally. Does anyone have any insights?

My commute ruined me, I suffered pelvic pains, she was so low, paid out a fortune in physio. Then stopped my 1.15hr drive each way and between Friday and Tuesday the pain had stopped completely. Think I worked to 38 and she came at 41+. Will be using holidays to go from full to part time the last few months and finish 36wks I think..bet my current jobs is better about WFH than my last one was at least!

Yeah I am kyles101 ! Well remembered. So fricking excited.

In regards to when to leave... with DS I couldn't hack the commuting and I just felt so ready to pop so ended up leaving at 36 weeks - everyone took the right piss at work, saying how I'm doing it just to enjoy at least a month off to myself. DS actually ended up coming at 37 weeks!

This time round I am with different company but have ended up with the same long commute as last time... luckily I have option to work from home with this job and they've already said they'll understand if I need to leave earlier than 1st Sep.

I'm regards to going back to work... I just don't know! Think I'll have to see when the time comes.

I know several people who didn't get any time off work before their babies arrived a few weeks early, I definitely want at least a week and I want to go off knowing everything is handed over and being looked after.

We can't carry holidays over so I will have nearly 4 weeks to use before the baby, would ideally like to know what week my ELCS is likely to be so I can use up all the holidays before mat leave kicks in.

We can’t carry leave over and holiday year finishes 31 Aug, so using leave to finish at 36 weeks.

Unfortunately no negotiation to be had on our mat pay as its effectively public sector. but its not too bad.

i'm moving abroad for a few months, returning just before the flying deadline. Got an important exam 10 days before due date. Will cross my legs #determined.

I'm public sector too @Megan2018 but the mat pay isn't awful.

I'm planning on going early this time. I want some time with dd before little one arrives. Plus I'm hoping for a successful VBAC so want to be as relaxed as possible. I'm planning on days down the beach and lots of ice cream! The reality is I'll be sweating my arse off chasing Dd around the park or garden 😂

I'm going to reduce my working days at 33 weeks and I'm thinking of going at around 36 weeks.

@happydays00 having been in your shoes, and taken legal advice, you are not employed so you don't have any employment rights HOWEVER if you manage to get stuff in writing it will hold. Do you have a contract? And does the pregnancy mean you are not able to honour it? If you are still going to be able to deliver it, bar flying out, you've a good case. If you've nothing in writing it's worth trying to get something before you tell them you are pregnant- emails are ok.

Re working til the bitter end- you just can't know for sure until you're there! Every pregnancy is different. Obviously some jobs/commutes are going to be pretty hopeless, but babies come early, pelvic girdles play up, and people get knackered. If you're planning to truck on, it's definitely worth making sure you are not mission critical past 37 weeks (eg- write your handover notes and cc people into emails...). I'm hoping to go as late as possible (my biggest work date in the year is 6 days after my EDD, and we are launching a huge new project at the start of September...) but will have cover in place from August. It's going to be a manic summer and to be honest if we can get the cover started on June we could use the extra staff!!

I am going off at 32 weeks! Looks like i will be earliest off!
My commute is a bitch, a hour each way made up of train and walking. I also do all drop offs of current (4) dc although dp does all pick ups.
Spd is kicking my arse at 17+6 and tbh i would be surprised if i make it to 32 weeks without being back on sick
20 week scan two weeks tomorow so will be finding out if pink or blue

@IVEgottheDECAF if you make it to 32 weeks you should have a medal!!!! SPD is grim grim grim!!!!!
Oooh are you the first 20 week scan??? I feel like I only had my 12 week one 5 minutes ago!

Min is a week tomorrow @DustyDoorframes! I can't wait! When's yours?

Mine not min!

I have a few 'easy' weeks lined up at work now, but May & June is more full on. Hopefully i can manage it but i need my work to accept i can't do certain things!

@Florencenotflo mine's not til the end of May! I'm not due til the 30th...

@IVEgottheDECAF ugh, can you get your midwife to write you a note of some sort? (I'm guessing Dr Sympathy won't be up for writing a helpful note...)

I work from home but think I will start my maternity leave on my due date and take annual leave a week before. If I go over two weeks I don’t want to be at home for 4weeks! I’ll just spend money I haven’t got shopping! Isn’t it best to tell Work you will finish later and can then bring it forward, opposed to an earlier date and then you can’t extend it if feeling ok?

@DustyDoorframes thanks, that's really helpful. I don't have a contract - they don't issue them, they just provide a PO number as some sort of reassurance that they've raised the funds to pay you until the end.

I would be able to deliver the majority of the project but because of the nature of it there would be projects to deliver onsite (product launches, training, media events etc) which I obviously wouldn't be able to complete.

It sounds as though I don't really have any rights at all and just have to rely on this company's (hopefully) good nature! It just doesn't seem right!

@happydays00 well, technically as it's freelance you can deliver the project as you see fit- including subcontracting bits (eg the onsite part). They are buying the work done, not your time to do it. If that's not acceptable there is a case to be made that you are actually an employee, and therefore due a whole load of rights and holiday pay etc. But you'd be into the realms of court cases by then so definitely better to resolve amicably! It's worth you having a plan re how the on-site stuff could work when you tell them you're pregnant, so you are presenting a solution not a problem.

Hi everyone, sorry to butt in!

Sorry I'm a bit of a late joiner.

First baby due September 24th. Very excited! Anyone else struggling to start sleeping on their side? I have slept on my front for so long, I just can't seem to fall asleep in any other position! Worrying about when I get bigger and not being able to do that anymore!

Nice to meet you all officially (although I've been lurking for a little while) xx

17 weeks today and no bump 🤷🏻‍♀️

@Moraxella
17 weeks today here and definite bump! I think both is normal though, I’m short so think that means less room to hide!

18 weeks today and very bumpy. But fifth baby!

Two weeks today to 20 week scan!

I had zero time off before my son was born as he arrived one evening without warning after working all day! He was born prem at 33 weeks so was a massive shock and we really weren’t ready. Hadn’t packed a hospital bag or started handover notes with work so I dropped them in it somewhat. I had intended to work until 37 weeks then use 2 weeks holiday, but obviously that didn’t happen. I remember starting to get really uncomfortable and struggling from 32 weeks, so I don’t want to go much longer than that this time, and I’d like to spend some fun time with my little boy before the baby arrives.

Now I’m only working part time and doing 2 days in the office (3 hour train commute each day) but 2 shorter days from home so hopefully I shouldn’t struggle so much with working. I’m hoping to aim for 34 weeks then a months holiday. I have loads accrued from only finishing maternity leave in February this year

16 weeks now and bump is already about the size it was at 20weeks first time around 😱