July 2019 (thread 9): shame me about my bump, and I'll shame you about your complete lack of manners

[RooKangaroo]

Honestly, I go to catch up on the thread after a few days and you guys have filled it up! Love this chatty group.

How is everyone this morning?

Another that's been away for a couple of weeks to find we have a new home! Welcome to all the newcomers, and AIDE I'm glad the little monkey finally moved for you!

I've finally had a successful 20 week scan at 22 weeks yesterday. Baby Wombat is still curled up in its little cave so no lovely side view for nub theories but all the important bits checked out healthy and happy. I did see what could have been a potty shot with 3 little lines, which may work in with the nub theory of being a girl. We have it folded and stapled together in a way that there's no accidental opening but I am tempted!! It's been hidden as DH is definitely looking to find out.

My placenta is still anterior but it's high now and I've felt so many lovely little rumblings and kicks. DH finally got to feel a little nudge but they'll start coming through stronger no doubt.

Is anyone here planning a home birth? I initially was but now I'm wavering a little. I've also finally found a non-NCT antenatal course, and a hypnobirthing course with the Bump and Baby Club. It feels like the course is more informative than NCT but with the benefits of having the meet ups afterwards also - and it includes a baby first aid part. Starting to feel real!!

I've finally started getting excited and buying more bits. There's a lovely online site that has a sale, called the essential one, and Aden and Anais has a sale on so I purchased some bits there also. I've got my changing bag sorted also .

Does anyone have a list of the very basics that they are buying? We aren't going to get too much but I feel the list creeping up!

This is the quick list I’ve done, I’m sure there will be more and needs adjustments but i just wrote down what I could remember of the top of my head.

@Toria73 I’m sorry to hear they were worried about the growth of your little ones. Sometimes I think they panic very quickly though. You always get smaller or bigger babies and they are just going by what they should be on average.
I find there are a lot of consultants and midwives who lack sensitivity which makes no sense baring in mind who/what they are dealing with. When I had my MC, I had several drs and MWs say some awful things without seeming to think about how that would sound to me. Try to keep your chin up and remember that every baby and every pregnancy is different.

@gaymummy I've not had any advisement on induction yet, however I'm in a pregnancy yoga group and about 5 of the ladies have been advised they will be induced at 38 weeks, I was really surprised at that but assumed every pregnancy has its own needs so must be normal. Good luck in challenging your consultant to find out more

Toria the docs sound thorough but insensitive, what a pain. I hope 1/4 comes round quickly for you and it's all found to be a false alarm. As with sac/yolk measurements (gosh, remember those!) it's all a bit imprecise. Sending you hugs and virtual doughnuts. 🍩

I agree on the tone/sensitivity point - often lacking. I reluctantly filled in a comment card for our emergency maternity walk in on Friday and the main things I said were discretion and sensitivity were needed, in addition to getting the case out the door.

On things to buy, we've got the following, which are v minimal but feel like the bare bones of something -

• newborn nappies 2 packs (seems a baby needs 6 a day to start with?! 😱)
• Aptamil pre-made bottle things
• white sleepsuits in newborn and in 0-3
• white vest things in newborn and 0-3
• newborn clothes set, crucially incl a hat
• muslins
• swaddles
• blanket (waffle looking one)

Plus we have the pram that can work for overnight sleeping.

As you can tell, we're far from experts (yet!) and there'll be more, and more interesting, things to add. But at least it's some basics in case the baby comes early or I get too sick to do it. I've no reason to expect either, more my anxious side.

@toria That does sound scary, but glad They are monitoring it. Hope this week passes fast for you.

We've been sorting out the garden this weekend. I can't do much so feel useless as normally super active, but as my husband said I'm doing the most important job. What he does is easy ☺

Went to a Mamas and Papas event today. Learnt a lot about prams! We quite like Bugaboo as easy to travel with which is important to you. They had such a good discount so bought nursery furniture.

Have to tell work soon 're when I'm going on mat leave. Still haven't decided whether to go mid or early June, I'm due 10th July.

Oh, and my belly button isn't also the same as it was before, stuck mid way and still thinking about a further escape.

Thank you all. I did a bit of googling this afternoon, No1 was 1lb7 & No2 was 1lb8 so for 24wks that doesn’t seem too bad. I’m just going to assume that everything is ok & they’re just being cautious as there’s 2 of them. Plus the fact is I’m only 5ft3 so I’m not expecting them to be giants 😉

@gaymummy my SIL had IVF and had a spontaneous labour so I don't think IVF automatically equals induction. Definitely worth asking more questions so you can decide what you think is best for you and baby!

We ordered our new car yesterday 😁 it's the first time we've ever had a 'new' car and it feels like such a grown up decision. It will be ready mid-June for us, we chose a Volvo XC40. A bit of a change from my little Ka! Proper family car with room for the dog in the boot too.

Morning all.

@thedust - fun with a new car. We were going to get one too but decided to wait a bit as the one we have is big enough.

Does anyone know the rules around driving with a newborn? At the event yesterday they said if the baby is less than 3months he/she should only be in the seat for 30min at a time...

Also, is anyone getting weird aches and pains? Feel like there is something painful everyday now... but comes out of nowhere.

@blueeyedviking both our cars are only 3 door and my Ka probably wouldn't even fit the pram in the boot so felt we needed to!

At our John Lewis nursery appointment we were also told about the 30 minute rule, but for 0-6 months old. Other places said 90 minutes. 30 minutes doesn't seem like much at all, I bet some journeys home from the hospital are longer than that for some people! Especially if there are unexpected traffic jams etc. We won't be doing long journeys but our parents live about 20-25 minutes away, sometimes it's a bit longer depending on traffic. You'd never go anywhere if you followed the 30 minute rule!

@thedust it takes us 45 mins to an hour, depending on traffic, to get home from the hospital so there’s that rule out of the window! I’d read it was 30 minutes from 0-4 weeks old (I think) then 2 hours max from there. I can’t remember where I read that though nor do I remember if that’s exactly correct. I’ll have to do some research.

@thedust &@beckybutterfly Another thing to read up on then. We are supposed to go to Cornwall (5 hour drive) in late August so 7 weeks after due date. It's a holiday which was planned a year ago so need to figure out how to make that happen but in a safe way for the baby.

I think it comes from this study www.nhs.uk/news/pregnancy-and-child/warning-over-babies-sleeping-in-car-seats/ but as it says, it isn't really a big enough study to change recommendations and it's more to do with sleeping in the car seat - although I guess a newborn will be asleep most of the time! There's no official guidance on the NHS website on car seats www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/child-car-seats-and-child-car-safety/#using-a-baby-or-child-car-seat I'd maybe just sit in the back with the baby to monitor and take regular breaks, I'm sure it's fine.

@Toria73 Cats bottom phase

@thedust &@beckybutterfly oh gosh, I had no idea about this 30 minute rule. All family live 30 minutes+ away so that will be us visiting in-laws definitely out for the first month. Definite silver lining there!

Is anyone struggling with work? I work in a role I can't do when visibly pregnant so I have been given various non-patient contact jobs for the past 3 weeks. I am literally bored to tears, I really hate it. I'm alone on a laptop at home instead of in a busy team, I can't believe I have to do this for another 3 months (planning on taking mat leave from 37 weeks). I'm so fed up I'm going to tell my GP on a check up in 2 weeks as I've had depression before, but I feel fine when I'm not working!

The advice I've been given is baby shouldn't be in the car seat for more than 2 hours (various high street stores). We have been looking at car seats that allow the baby to lay flat, which gives you more time. As the key issue with the car seat is them being curled up can impact lung growth, etc.
My folks are 2+ hours drive and 1 to MIL and it will be us travelling to them at Christmas, so hopefully should be ok. Will do a little more research, thanks for the NHS links @thedust

Hey everyone!

Back again - I've been dipping in and out a bit as I'm just so preoccupied with work atm but really hope everyone is doing well 💕

We had a 4d scan on Saturday it was amazing definitely recommend it.

@SerenaOverjoyed my role has changed at work too and I am struggling. I feel like a spare part which isn’t nice. I’m probably going to end up having some time off on the sick with my pre existing anxiety disorder because it is really playing up at the minute.

Hello all, can't believe we are onto another new thread!

Sorry to hear that some of you are struggling at work.

We have a holiday planned 5 hours drive away in October so need to look into this car seat thing a bit more too.

Does anyone have any experience of moving to a new area while pregnant? I've just moved and I keep receiving conflicting advice. It's stressing me out! New GP receptionist said I wouldn't need to do anything as it would all be transferred over automatically with the GP move but also said it takes 2-3 weeks to transfer over. I find this hard to believe since I've never been to my GP regarding my pregnancy apart from for flu/whooping cough jab.

I asked if there is anyone I need to phone to tell them I've moved and she said no. My current midwife is aware of the move and said I can keep going to them till it's all transferred over to the new midwives, I'm just not sure how to join the new midwife. I would rather just transfer over right away as otherwise I need to travel an hour for my appointments. I'll also miss out on the free classes etc. I don't know if I should trust the GP receptionist or phone around and see if I need to self refer to the new midwives. She wouldn't even give me a phone number. So confused!

@GiGi18 if I was you I’d phone the doctors that I’m moving to and ask them. I wouldn’t want to wait for them to sort things x

@Giraffe888 it was the new doctors that told me to wait 🤯 so if I phone them I'll prob get the same woman 😂 think I'll just phone who I think my new midwife will be and ask them.

Hi all, back from wales holiday and back to work. OH got his work van swapped for a massive estate car a new insignia and there is tonnes of room for baby and gear in back.

We have just had our loft boarded out for extra storage too! Just need to do a car boot to flog the rest of the stuff in baby's room before we start decorating.

Also did some gardening hoeing weeding yesterday and on holiday did lots of walking.. one day did 9 miles! And almost 27 weeks now! Happy days... couple more days then get to find out if I have a job with this restructure bollocks that has been drawn out since December!

Ladies.. a personal question.. how much weight have you gained so far. I've put on loads of weight and I'm panicking that I'll be huge and will struggle to lose it after baby comes.

@fortheloveofdoughnuts I’m 5lb heavier than my pre-pregnancy weight but I lost almost half a stone in the first 10 weeks. Don’t worry about losing it now, focus on it when the time is right after baby arrives. I’m very weight/diet/exercise focussed but not worrying about it now. I intend to get out and do lots of walking when baby arrives x

@twinkleday hope you had a lovely holiday! Good luck with the job news x