The March-ers 2019 - #9 Meet the Babies

[Angelmiracle]

Thread 9 wow 🤗

All being well a lot more birth announcements this thread 👣🍼🤰🏿🤰🤰🏾🤰🏼

Check-in mamas ✔

@melissa112 have you tried heartburn tablets etc i found I needed to eat little and often and needed gaviscon after most meals even if it wasn’t actual heartburn.
Crying is pretty normal at this stage I cried lots over silly things in the latter stages.

And definitely try and get out to groups baby massage is good because you are concentrating on baby but still get the chance to say hello to other mums. Remember once you have discussed your sore bits and babies poo with a stranger they may become a friend for life

@Jenfur I can definitely relate to nobody explaining the point at which you were supposed to fend for yourself. I had been brought meals in bed because I was C-section, but nobody explained that once the catheter was out I was supposed to go to the dining room and get meals myself. With the result that I totally missed lunch the day after giving birth! They eventually found me a pile of grated cheese and some crackers and salad so that I didn't totally starve...!! The thing I keep telling myself is that it will be different this time because I'll know what to expect. It won't be such a shock, and I will be a bit more on the ball. I hope!

@melissa112 The smell really was dire - one of the workmen actually had a bit of a funny turn himself which I am sure was due to the adhesive! I just went out for the entire day and left all the windows open (other people were at home, luckily). By the evening it was much better. Regarding the stomach cramps, I'm not sure... But I have had some pretty bowel-movementy cramps today which hasn't been pleasant. Sorry you're feelingupset - hopefully being busy over the next few days will help. I honestly think it is just such an emotional time! I remember crying quite a bit in the lead up to having DS - not for any real reason! I just felt like I wasn't ready I think! I had these visions of floating around in a beautifully prepared house, and in reality I was desperately scrubbing bathrooms and cleaning skirting boards and generally feeling like I was NEVER going to get to the point where I felt good about it!

@Angelmiracle sounds like a tough experience with DS for you. Really hope that you are able to enjoy it more this time round.

@Sictransitgloria it is so hard when your expectations / dreams of how you will give birth are altered. I was absolutely gutted when I had to be induced and was told that I couldn't even labour in water. But the midwife saw the disappointment in my face (although I said nothing) and she did say to me - I think I've said it on here before - 'This is not the worst-case scenario. I've seen the worst-case scenario, and believe me, as long as you leave this hospital with your baby it doesn't matter how it gets here.' She said it very nicely and I took the point.

@AssumeItWasSomethingClever I cannot BELIEVE how awful this guy is being. I hope the police can do enough to reassure you.

@Wineandchoccy congratulations on your baby girl :)

@cardboard33 my NCT group last time created a WhatsApp group, and through that we organised meet-ups quite regularly. We were very spread out in terms of due dates because I live in a very rural area - the oldest in our group was born in April and the youngest (mine) was in July - so we had a couple of meet-ups where we were part-bumps, part-babies! I found it really helpful having the WhatsApp group. One of the girls even messaged us while she was in labour asking for advice! I don't think it would be too keen to organise drinks - someone has got to take that first step!

Currently sat in the waiting room for a growth scan. Hopefully it'll be 3rd time lucky and they'll actually do what they need to do this time ha

@SquirtlesMumAgain oh I really feel for you! The first 16 weeks were my least favourite bit of this whole thing with the sickness, really sorry you're still going through it but glad you have it under control somewhat. Yea I can see how things can become isolating quite quickly and will definitely make the effort to look at some groups.

@Wineandchoccy baby massage is on my list for that very reason. Nice to get baby out but focus isn't completely on the mums so a nice way to ease myself in. That's interesting about the Gaviscon, I've got enough in the house to stock a pharmacy so I'll try that next time. Have eaten lunch since and haven't had the same pain so.does seem like a first meal thing which is odd.

@BadBadBeans glad the smell is much better now. I think by this point baby is pretty much ready anyway aren't they so its nice to think they probably won't be affected by much such as smells etc at this stage. That feeling of never quite feeling ready may be exactly what it is. I have a list of stuff to do, some that I need OH to do, most of it wouldn't have any effect on baby either way if its not done before hes here (we have a particularly dusty hall lightshade I want replacing for instance). I might have to separate out into 'must have dones' and 'nice to haves'.

@WhatALearningCurve hope you get your scan today and that all goes well with measurements!

Has anyone put the car seat into the car yet? Ours is still in the box. We did try it before we bought it but OH says he is going to clean my car this weekend now that DDog doesn't need to go in there and put the car seat in. I don't have too many plans that involve driving but then worry that I'll have a bump for some reason and car seat will have to be replaced. But then there's no reason to think I will have a bump so might be best to have it in there?

@melissa112 the base is in the car and seat is in the porch! Saying that still got a few bits to go in the hospital bag but it's half packed and I have everything for it in the house now! It's going in DHs car for hospital and when he's on paternity and then it will go in my car when he goes to work. Although we might buy another base if it becomes a pain.

Got some £2 Primark big pants and a crop top with hidden support. Also so cheap muslins and bibs. They're all 100 percent cotton, etc. Not my fav shop but i guess they're no worse than other high street shops really (for how stuff is made that is!)

We put the isofix in a couple of weeks before but the car seat we left next to my hospital bags for the same reason just in case we had an accident at least not everything would need to be replaced @melissa112

So after all this stress. He's measuring at 7.3lb (I'm 37+2). Which seems completely normal and average and not like the Guinness Book of Records need to be alerted 😂

@whatalearningcurve haha! Good news.

@WhatALearningCurve what a relief!

@melissa112 I probably wouldn't bother putting the car seat in until you go to hospital. Although do practise first, yes!

I've been feeling rough today. Just generally sicky and a bit refluxy/burpy and a bit hot and shivery. I've spent half the afternoon lying down. Really not ideal as I have a freelance job I need to get done, but I honestly couldn't sit up long enough to do it. My dad is here this weekend so I might just have to ask him to watch DS for a couple of hours while I crack on with some work, rude as that is. The baby is also moving an awful lot and has been all day, which has not helping with the feeling of nausea. It's also very unusual for baby, who is normally pretty still during the day and active in the evenings. @cardboard33 was it you who was worried about whether it was normal for the baby to move loads? What was the consensus there? I am wondering if perhaps it's moving because it's breech and it's working its way into the correct position.

Of course it has just struck me that it could be moving loads because I have been lying down!

@WhataLearningCurve great news on growth scan! Baby's doing well by sounds of it.

@BadBadBeans I'm specifically lying down for an hour just now to see it if baby kicks off. After a busy day I haven't noticed an awful lot already. Can see the tummy wobbling already and I've only lay down 5 mins! I'm sure that's what all the activity is for you.

Had antenatal physio today. My sacroiliac joint was totally out of place again so she's popped it back in or whatever lol and now I'm in agony as it'll be tender a few days. So glad to be taking leave tomorrow.

@melissa112 my plan is also to put base in this weekend. Make sure all fits and leave car seat in spare room until DH is coming to collect us. Also I completely understand your apprehension at joining the baby groups I was similar. I meet new people through work on a weekly basis which is no bother. But in an unofficial capacity it's like what do you do, how do you act, what are the rules etc. However when you push past those initial nerves and can compare notes and tips with other mums it's really worth it and opens up other possibilities and invites or suggestions of other groups/baby activities to try. And it's reassuring to know you're not the only one going through a certain development leap/stage/phase with your baby.

Library Rhythm and Rhyme sessions are good when they're bit older. Also check out if any baby sensory classes are on near hand. I'm looking forward to doing it this time - wasn't a thing 6 yrs ago with DS!

@badbadbeans I'm with you on feeling rough today. I've just felt really strange and been lying down for the last hour or so. Just feel headachey and heartburny and nausea has defo made a comeback. I've gone from shivering to sweating so really hope I'm not coming down with something.

I think I'm starting to lose bits of my mucus plug.. It's not bloody but it's definitely not normal discharge (sorry for TMI) have also been having period like cramps but they are just twinges here and there - not sure if it means labour is nearing? It's so hard to tell what's normal and what's not at this stage. I feel so responsible for knowing exactly what's going on in my body when I literally have no clue. Every twinge panics me as I have no idea what it means and my husband thinks everything is labour and gets himself in a panic...

Just wanted to say thanks for all your advice re: my predicament with the birth preference. I ended up talking to one of my friends who is an independent midwife and spoke through it all. Then went to an antenatal class at my local birth centre (5 min walk!) and the midwife there was very lovely and reassured me that labour ward isn’t that bad. She said she would keep an eye out for my name if she was on duty that day. My main fear was having interventions which I ideally want to avoid as the stats say that you’re more likely to have intervention if you’re on a labour ward. And was worried I’d be conpletely out of control. Midwife also said if she was on she’d ask me to get in and out of the pool and if I could do that then I could have the water. I feel so much better about it now, wish this midwife was my community midwife as she was bloody brilliant and a total advocate for women and safe choices.

Sorry I feel like I defo threw my toys out of the pram about it when others have a lot more going on!

All I can say is that you definitely know it's labour when it's labour in my experience.

Thanks for the guidance on car seats. We really wanted the base but the seats in the back of my car are too sloped and the seat looked a little pushed forward. I'm going to practise with OH installing it via seatbelt and just leave it till we go to the hospital.

@Gronk27 I also got the primark big knickers, some cheap button down night shirt things and some flannels.

@WhatALearningCurve that's good news about babys growth!

@BadBadBeans and @Harley8888 sorry to see you're both not feeling too good. Seems a lot have some of the early symptoms back or other symptoms have ramped up. Definitely feel the same and it's just a bit draining!

@Angelmiracle I'm the same in that meeting new people via work doesn't really bother me as I know what I'm doing there, well most of the time! I can definitely see how it will help having a group of people to talk to who are going through the same. I'll have a Google for library rhythm and rhyme and the sensory classes sound great. I'll definitely look forward to that one!

The popping back in sounds painful!! Are you finishing for maternity tomorrow?

With the movements I'm finding it quite hard to gauge what is normal anymore. When I was at work I felt baby had more of a pattern than now I'm off. I thought I'd notice movements more when I've been at home but currently having a mini panic as realised I've only felt about 5 squirms all day which is very unusual. Going to lie down and concentrate on him properly

@Sictransitgloria the midwife sounds brilliant. So glad you're feeling better and reassured

@melissa112 I get what you mean about feeling nervous, but from having done NCT it appears that most first time parents are as clueless as each other so it's good to have the support network and pool the knowledge you do have!! We found the NCT process odd in the sense that there was no social element to the classes so we don't know what people do as a job, or how long they've been with their partner, but you know all details about their health and pregnancy. It's odd. Don't recall who replied about the NCT thing, think @angelmiracle but someone (who isn't me) has now proposed a meet up in a few weeks. I was just a little cautious as I set up the what's app group (we've got one for everyone and then an all girl's one) and am generally the organiser of all of my social/work circles, but don't want that side of me to come on too keen from the outset even though they've already done the whole "you're clearly going to organise us all" jokes.

@badbadbeans yes that was me, but the baby has never been breach (at least we've had scans once every 2 weeks and it never has been at the time of the scan) and I've come to the conclusion that it's just ridiculously active. The midwives have all commented on how much it moves (so it's not me being dramatic!) and have said it's likely because I'm "all baby" so it's only a couple of cm at most away from the surface so I can see/feel everything. Although they've also commented that it's odd that I feel so much (and from 15 weeks) given where the placenta is... So I don't know!!! Sorry yours is being a pain though, not really what you want when you're trying to do stuff!!

@harley888 I feel similar. Whenever I get anything and mention it my husband is like "well, is that normal?!?" as if I'm supposed to have all the answers. We can both Google as well as each other, y'know!!

@cardboard33 I’m an organiser too! I took on the ‘secrrtary’ role for our antenatal class and I see if anyone wants to meet for coffee once a week. Those that do, do. Etc. I reckon everyone will be so pleased that someone’s sorting out things when they’re desperate to get out the house and to have a conversation with another human!!

@melissa112 it wasn't sore at the time but walking and sitting at the desk has been tough afterwards! They recommend using ice so must try it.

I'm on annual leave tomorrow as it's last day of mid term for DS but I've already asked DM to have him a few hours which isn't fair to not plan something with him but I've no energy. I finish next Friday for maternity!!

I agree with the change in movements- they're rolling pushing prodding type of movements so not the karate kicks or octopus arms I used to feel. I find I have to really pay attention to notice the movements. MW on Monday said it was normal?!

@Harley8888 I've had the same problem with movement. She'd put herself somewhere I could barely feel her so I had to be very conscious of looking out for movement. Lasted about a week and the back more obvious movements last night. So frustrating! And yes, these last few weeks are dragging...

@WhatALearningCurve that's good news!

@Sictransitgloria fingers crossed she's there or that the others are like her when the time comes. Glad you're feeling more positive.

I've got a cold so feeling a bit crap and been having hot flushes all afternoon. Looking forward to a soak in the bath tonight.

@sictransitgloria the midwife you saw today sounds lovely! tbh, we've decided it's kind of what you make it other than when baby ultimately has other ideas and then everything you thought you wanted goes out of the window anyway... and as long as you're informed about the decisions you may need to make, and have spoken about the decision you may make in different scenarios in advance, then it should be fine wherever you end up giving birth because you will still be in control. Have you looked in detail at some of the options/interventions etc yet? I found that really helpful as I feel a lot more in control than I did a few weeks ago. There's also presumably more interventions on a labour ward because that's where all of the "high risk" women are by default and because interventions are an option, perhaps more people do take them up on them than would if they weren't available? Disclaimer: Never had a baby so may well be talking complete bull! :)

In NCT and hynobirthing they kept going on about BRAIN which is essentially an anagram to help you make life decisions, and some food for thought if you are offered an intervention:
what are the benefits,
what are the risks,
are there alternatives,
what does your intuition/gut say,
what if we do nothing

... you might find that useful when you're faced with a predicament?

@gronk27 we sound very similar! my husband wouldn't see his friends if I didn't arrange it for him. I also figured that someone needs to take the lead and hate it when people are all like "yeah, that'd be cool..." RADIO SILENCE AS NO ONE WANTS TO BE THE ONE TO MAKE A DECISION ... so at that point I always take on the role of plan master to make it actually happen. But husband refuses to start the men what's app group on the basis that we don't want to come across as one of those uber keen couples who want to be bbfs with everyone from the word go. I don't think we would do and I think the others would be relieved...?!

@cardboard33 when the lady who ran it asked for the volunteer, it was just awkward silence but then I piped up, DH said ‘I knew you were going to volunteer’. Ours wasn’t split into the sexes and awkwardly just one man joined the group! Your DH could always say does anyone want to organise and if no-one dies then just go for it. Like you say stuff doesn’t just happen by magic or people saying they don’t mind haha!

Thanks everyone - feeling a lot better. (Sorry so many of you have @ me! Such a supportive board)

@cardboard33 we have been doing the hypnobirthing course online but haven’t got to the BRAIN thing - sounds good, thanks for sharing :)

In my limited experience when it comes to interventions it is often much more out of your control than you would maybe like.

For example with DS I was told I had until the doctor had prepped the forceps to push him out or I would be having the intervention (I could see him prepping the tray)