Ringing in the New Year & 2nd trimester - July 2019!

[wombatron]

New home and new thread to start 2019.

@AIDE2424 @cravingmilkshake @HchyScott @ReginaPhalange89 - will tag more when I go back to remember.

Bring on the fake Prosecco and bed by 10pm tonight!

docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1y-XaVbeNQM-bCGlrUxXxcBBNGUfIVQY4htZRUpbbw

@FuzzyPixel - do the 3 women all know that there are two other vying for the name? Maybe an identifier as in Nana Rose, Nana Emma and Nanna Sue or whatever their names are.

Or you may just find that the baby comes up with something off the wall himself/herself that sticks!

My parents didn’t prepare for this eventuality and lived a long way from my grandparents such that we only saw them around once or twice a year. I had a book called “When Grandpa and I went to the park” but I’d never heard of a female grandparent. I ended up with a Grandpa and a Lady Grandpa! She did write to me when I was 10 suggesting that now I was in double figures I might be grown up enough now to call her Grandma!

15+5 here. Boobs have gone from 28F/30E to 32E, am slightly thicker around the middle and sometimes do think it’s a bump but still seems to fluctuate a lot, is bigger at the end of the day and I think possibly is a bit too high to be anything to do with baby. Probably more to do with mince pies and no exercise in the first trimester! Everyone at work keeps commenting how tiny I look. Not sure if they are just trying to be nice! I can really feel a firmness clearly and easily first thing in the morning when I’m lying down, presumably when my bladder is full and pushing everything forwards.

If I have a poke and a prod when I’m lying down I can feel the top of my uterus just under half way between my pubic bone and my belly button.

DS coped with 3 grandads (my dad, my FIL, and my grandad, until he passed away) and just identified them by the female half e.g. "you mean gran and grandad, mummy?". So I wouldn't worry too much about names. Must admit I was relieved mum and MIL opted for different names though!

Diana - Lady Grandpa ❤️❤️❤️

Mine also gets bigger at the end of the day. I've been wondering if kg face and arms have actually got a teeny tiny bit thinner. I weigh the same despite looking more blobby. So maybe the weight slightly redistributes at that stage or something?

Have had a day of feeling sick on the sofa. I think maybe a busy week makes it come out more. Still though! 14+6, I was hoping the HG would shift already.

Btw, on the grandparents, the little one might just thing 'nana' is the term for a caring older lady for a while? My friend's two year old calls all men 'daddy', thinking that just means friendly man, which her OH isn't massively happy about! Oops.

@Yukka yes scan this week ! Not til Friday unfortunately, I'll be 12+4 . Dragging in 🙈 when is yours?

My eldest daughter has 3 Gran's and they're all called Margaret!! What are the chances haha . Two of them are Granny and one is Grandma (her choice). I think it's just what you're using to isn't it . I called all my grandparents Gran & Granda and just assumed my kids would do the same but my dad randomly started calling himself Grampa so that stuck .

I was actually just discussing the grandparents names thing tonight with my dad and step-mum. My step-mum can’t decide what she wants to be because she says she doesn’t feel old enough to be a Grandma! My mum is going to be Grandma, my mother-in-law is going to be Nan and my step-mum is still deciding. Oh and my Nana will be Great Grandma. My father-in-law is going to be Papa John or Pops for short and my dad will be Granddad.

Hello everyone, I was in the first few threads but then my dad died mid December so haven't been on since. Feeling a bit more human now after all the grief and at last my sickness has subsided, hurrah!

Also had my 12 week scan and due 4 days earlier than previously thought, so now the 20th July! Beginning to get excited now as final told the kids and can now tell parents/friends etc

Haven't managed to catch up on this thread but I hope everyone is feeling well and getting excited too the countdown is on!

@Regina I’m scanning on Monday at 12.1 so we are around the same date. I was a few days ahead last week though so we’ll see!

Just back from seeing A Star is born, what a great film. I’ve got a lady crush on Gaga...she’s amazing.

Evening all, how is everyone?
Just checking in, i didn’t intentionally intend to drop out for so long there. It wasn’t until I was trying to catch up on all the chat I realised how long it had been.
Today my mat jeans that I’d bought (just in case I might wake up one day with a bump instead of flab) finally fitted. Oh Em Gee they are so feckn comfortable!! How come nobody tells you about wee perk?!? The moment I put them on I realised how uncomfortable I’d been all week in my regular jeans & work clothes.
Elsewhere in dreamland I’ve been having lots of quality loving with Chris from Catastrophe... If I’m being honest, so far he’s been the best (& most age appropriate) of all my dream lovers. Def has some mad skills 😂😂

whyohwhypart2 I'm sorry to hear that - that's so tough for you to go through. Hope you're doing ok and looking after yourself.

@whyohwhypart2 sorry to hear this news about your dad, must be so difficult for you and sending lots of hugs.. on a positive note at least you have your bundle of joy on the way later on in the year. 😘 I still can't believe it's 2019 and we're having children this year it's always been a dream of mine XX

Morning all!
I had a dream last night that a random lady knocked on my door and said she was psychic , she was passing and had the strong urge to let me know i was pregnant and baby is a boy ! Lol

Also is anyone else feeling erm..... Aroused a lot I was off it for so long but the last few days have completely changed lol. I went to bed alone last night and ended up sending dirty texts to OH in the living room (which I never do! Haha) demanding him to the bedroom 😂. Not that he was complaining.

Had my combined test result back - 1 in 710. I'm really concerned, I know relatively speaking that sounds low but it doesn't seem low when I read other people's results online. Booking in for the nipt test but am now convinced something will be wrong.

Hi everyone
I’ve been off for a while because I’m going through a really tough situation and I’m not sure what to do. I’ve debated writing on here, but you all sound really nice and I have no one to turn to in RL.

I’m not quite 12 weeks yet, I have my scan this week. I’ve already had 2 scans at 5 and 7 weeks, which dp couldn’t come to due to work.

When I asked if he’d be able to make it to Tuesdays, he suddenly broke down and told me he didn’t want the baby. He’s happy with just our older dd and asked me to get a termination. I’ve refused, as this baby was very much wanted and planned and I want my baby. Dp is saying if I go through with it he’ll leave me as I’m not respecting his wishes. I’ve cried myself to sleep for 3 days and he’s just said “what are you doing about it then?”

I’m rambling and I don’t really know what anyone can say..I just don’t know what to do.

chinks123 I'm so sorry, that's so tough especially as you wanted this baby. Did he say why the change of heart? I think if you terminated and stayed with him, you'd end up blaming him.

Thankyou @Kentishgal, I’m heartbroken, we tried for a year so I just can’t get my head around it. He’s literally just said he’s changed his mind..and seems to expect me to just get rid of our child to suit him. He’s being very mean though “it’s not even a baby yet” blah blah. I’m starting to hate him already

OMG Chinks :( that's terrible. Don't abort if you don't want to! This is absolutely your decision and it sounded spoke you definitely want to keep the baby. He might come round after the scan, as he'll see it really is a baby by now. But even if he doesn't, it's his loss. I was persuaded to try for baby number 4, then left after she was born. It was one of the biggest shocks of my life but I am SO glad he's gone and I've got my gorgeous, amazing, funny 2 year old. You will cope. Men really are pathetic sometimes xx

Thankyou @BirthdayKake I’m crying again, I haven’t told anyone because I know my friends will just hate him. The thing is he’s refusing to come to the 12 week scan, and said it’s his choice too and he’s decided he only wants dd. Which is all well and good if we were ttc, but it’s already here in my eyes and I love it already. I know I can’t abort I just didn’t imagine my 8 year relationship ending xx

I so angry on your behalf! How dare he. He's not exactly thinking about DD's feelings either is he, if she potentially has to grow up knowing that her dad doesn't want her sibling?! Selfish man.

I'm so sorry to read about all these difficult situations you are finding yourself in. @here, I lost my dad very suddenly and DD was born 1 year later, it's a blessing. I really feel for you, the grief is unbearable. I hope that you are okay, send me a PM if you need to.

@clinks, that is unbelievable. I'd think very carefully, do you want to be in a relationship like that? On a slightly different note (and not defending him!) But would it be possible that he is mentally struggling?

I mentioned that @BirthdayKake and he said I was using dd as emotional blackmail. He’s being really horrible and I just want this to be a happy time.

Chinks I'm so very sorry. Must be a terrible shock to have him change his mind like this. It also doesn't help that you'll be full of hormones and really vivid feelings as it is - I was very sceptical about this before getting pregnant, but even as a very rational and mostly stoic person, it's definitely been a rollercoaster, and that's just in daily life. So this whole situation must be really hard on you. 💐

I agree with Kentishgal that you'd resent him if you just 'respect his wishes'. It would eat away at the relationship. There are two people's wishes to respect here, you had an understanding, a common goal, and now he wants something different it's not automatically on you to deliver that.

Is it possible to get to the bottom of what is worrying him - money; perceived loss of freedom once again, while the baby is little; the perception he won't be as close to you; fear of not being good enough somehow... Is it possible to get you both to a talking therapy of some kind? You've still got a bit of time. If not formal talking therapy, are there any sensible family members that can help get to the bottom of it? I know this would work in some but not other families...

I think the main thing is for you to focus on you, day by day, or hour by hour if need be. You're lovely. You're pregnant. You have time to think and work through this (ideally with him, or alone). Take the time and take care of yourself above everything else.

Kentishgal I'm 1:800 and also thought this was too low even though technically low risk. Didn't get much of a response here either way and looking forward to my NIPT result in a week's time, hopefully for peace of mind, or at least for more clarity on the extent of any problem. The NIPT was a lovely process and you spend a lot more time being able to see the baby.

@Trouble2cats I just don’t know how it would work if I keep the baby, would be come visit dd on a weekend (if he goes through with his threat of leaving) and ignore his other child?

He has had depression many years ago and I think it might be rearing it’s head again. The way he’s so detached and nasty.

@StargazyDrifter Thankyou for the advice and kind words I really appreciate it, you sound really nice! I feel so all alone with this pregnancy, I’m so happy about it and now it’s all sort of been taken away from me.

His only explanation is he doesn’t want it. We have good money, own our own house etc he just said he’s decided he wants 1 baby, and didn’t realise until I fell pregnant. He just doesn’t seem to care about my feelings at all at the moment.