June 2019 babies - part 5!!!!

[socktastic]

2nd trimester for all the lovely June mummies out there! Yippee!!!

Lovely news @Istef

I also have an anterior placenta and at 19 weeks haven't felt any movements. My mw said they wouldn't be concerned until 24 weeks. Don't have my next scan til 22+1 but thats only a few weeks away I suppose!

Congrats @lstef great news :)

I had my scan yesterday and although everything was fine and baby is healthy, the sonographer was super rude. I found it so degrading the way she spoke to me and she did the majority of her checks in silence and we had no idea if everything was okay or what we were even looking at. The pictures are quite blurry and she told me to 'lift all this up' grabbed my excess skin on my stomach and handing me it. I understand why but I think there's a better way to speak to women on their 20 week scan? I find the older women are always the worst, anyone else?

I feel bad posting this bit but, as I feared, the baby is another boy. I already have a 5 year old boy who desperately wanted a baby sister. My husband was okay about it but you could tell he wasn't thrilled. I cried for hours. Mainly because now I have to wait years for the little girl I wanted but then I was also kicking myself for being so selfish, some people here can't have children or have lost children and there's me practically grieving. I couldn't bring myself to get out of the car when I got gone and I couldn't bring myself to tell everyone who was desperately messaging me to find out the gender. Afterwards we all went shopping and I couldn't help but feel upset looking at the girls stuff and not like any of the boys stuff.

Will this ever wear off? I'm worried I'm not going to bond with the baby if I can't even bring myself to buy him anything...

I've had some sleep and woke up feeling so numb and low. Should I tell the midwife or will I sound like an idiot?

Sorry for the long post. I know I should just be happy for a healthy baby really. X

@excitedmama I think you should talk to the midwife, yes. Regardless of the reason, if you feel really low then you need support. Try not to feel guilty about how you feel. Some of us do have a preference about the sex of the baby and I don't think there's anything wrong with that. It's not as if you're saying that preference is more important than a healthy baby. Personally I'd much rather have a whole tribe of boys, it's just individual preference. For what it's worth, there were several ladies in the group when I had my little boy who also felt like you do. Each and every one of them now can't quite believe they felt like that, they are so in love with their little ones. Hope you feel better soon.

I've got my 16 week midwife appointment this morning, at 17+1 because it was my grandad's funeral last week. I'm going to talk to her about the extreme exhaustion I still have. It's driving me crazy.

@excitedmama it's completely normal to feel that way, I won't lie when I found out this baby was a boy I was a bit gutted.. I always imagined having a girl. It's been about 5 weeks since then and things have got better, I still get pangs when I see nice girl clothing etc but I'm more used to the idea now, I think because I've started feeling him moving. I felt so guilty feeling that way too but it just made me keep things to myself which made it worse.

@Istef what wonderful news! Glad they told you about the placentas as well, so you don't have to worry.

@excitedmama that's rough, I'm sorry. It's okay to feel the way you do. Be patient with yourself.

I have my glucose test today (moved up because the baby was measuring large). I am pretty sure I will be diagnosed as I have so many risk factors. My age, weight, ethnicity, etc. Plus the fact that the baby is big. Feeling down about it, but I'll do whatever I need to for baby and I to be healthy.

I do feel good about keeping my weight under control even without a diagnosis. I've gained around two kilos total and for my BMI I'm trying to stick to the guidelines of 5-9kg over the total pregnancy. That feels achievable to me.

@Istef How exciting! Do you which which sex of baby you are feeling movements from (the posterior placenta one?) I was watching binge watching Friends on Netflix the other day and watching the ones when Phoebe is preg with triplets. She was telling one off for prodding the others, which was funny. Do you think your's are playing with each other yet?

@excitedmama Sorry you feel that way. Do you think it might be the initial shock too? Like with grief, when its all encompassing to start with, but slowly ebbs away/ gets easier to deal with over time? I just wonder if you need to feel it really intensely now (which is mega hard!) to be ok with it in a few months? I'm hoping this is the case for you and you can can come to terms with it fairly soon. Agree with getting support for it too.

Have also heard LOTS of stories about rude sonographers, even ones who give medical advice. They aren't usually medically trained to make decisions, but usually tell women something HAS to happen because of XYZ, when all the know is the outcome from the scan and not other factors ect. The main one that comes to mind is women with low lying placenta's at 20/40, who are told to book their ELCS now, forgetting to tell women that placentas generally move upwards as the uterus grows... At my 12/40 scan, the sonographer had no people skills either. I was crying on the bed (with relief!) and no recognition of it, or tissues passed to me or anything!

That turned into a bit of a rant... Sorry!!

@Kescilly Good luck for your GTT today. xx

Joining at last after a healthy 20 week scan (baby healthy, my placenta is a bit low so will have another scan later on to check whether it's too close to the cervix).

Due 4 June, with my second.

@excitedmama – I think it's ok to grieve the daughters you will not have (if this is your last?) – I'd try to separate in your mind the two – you will love your little boy, but be sad there will be no girls. Take the time to grieve the future you thought you had, and then bond with your baby as it gets closer to birth. Sending love.

@excitedmama I was disappointed when I heard I was having a boy with my first but when he arrived it was just amazing!! I'm now expecting child two and really hoping it's a boy as I now can't imagine it being a girl. Be kind on yourself, hormones are a funny thing. It'll be so different when the baby is here.

Midwife appointment all good. Heard the heartbeat which was nice. She's impressed I'm still in my normal jeans haha. No advice on the extreme exhaustion I'm still struggling with.

Excited don’t feel bad. You’re grieving for the girl you wanted, it’ll take time to mentally adjust, but you will and you’ll feel better about it in time. FWIW I had a rude sonographer last time with dd and it really spoilt the whole scan experience.

Coaster I can’t believe you’re still in regular jeans!

@Reastie I have a theory about my lack of a bump. My life is very noisy. I work with teenagers with autism who can be very challenging and loud, and my little boy is currently going through an extremely rough patch which involves a LOT of screaming. I think baby is hiding near the back somewhere So much for showing earlier with your second. I was in maternity clothes by about 8 weeks last time! Pregnancy is just weird.

Yes @coastergirl

I agree! With DS I popped out at week 8 and was pretty hefty the whole pregnancy.

Am 19weeks today and fit one last pair of normal jeans (still) but now no longer need to panic as I can feel this baby tap dancing semi regularly so I know something is getting on ok in there.

I stupidly ditched my normal work dresses to replace with a couple from Purpless Maternity. I may as well hold a sign up saying YES I AM PREGGERS as the cut of them gives the game away. The folk that I see when I wear tops and trousers/jeans had no idea until I mentioned it.

Mental.

@coastergirl @PaulHollywoodsSexGut Still in normal jeans here too. I can't get my high waisted, non stretch ones done up, but the rest still fit. No real bump either, I just look like I've been overdoing it on the tacos.

I'm impatient for a neat little bump to I can look pregnant and not fat!

@coastergirl I too was in maternity jeans at 9 weeks with my first pregnancy, and am still in normal jeans now at 18 weeks...albeit I have in the last 2 weeks gone up a size from my everyday ones to ones I wore whilst still losing weight postnatally. But it's still a massive difference!
I definitely have a bump now though, but am hoping I can manage to be a bit more "neat" with this pregnancy rather than colossal all over like I was last time (though going by how much I'm eating every day, I wouldn't count on it 🤪)

@allfurcoatnoknickers

I look like a sturdy horse

Hi ladies. Twenty week scan today - all well and confirmed team pink.

Also went straight from scan and bought an s-max we'd been eying up so a busy day all round!

Hi @excitedmama I suspect I will be told I’m having another boy at my scan and I suspect I’ll have similar feelings to you. I love my son more than I could say but I always pictured myself as a mother to girls.

I can’t go anywhere near non pregnancy clothes unless they’re very stretchy or dresses cut in the right way. My 18 week bump is huuuuuge.

@PaulHollywoodsSexGut I sympathize. Dead ringer for a pit pony over here (I'm short).

@MadeInCornwallx3 congrats! I am so nervous about mine I'm really struggling to get through the week. Lack of bump and movement adding to worries.

@excitedmama I was the same when I found out I was having a girl at an early scan as had been hoping for a boy, but the anxieties I've been having since then about everything being ok have taken over any worries about gender. Don't feel guilty though for feeling this way. You are not alone x

No movement here at 18 weeks, and I had hoped I would feel something as it’s my second. There’s always something to worry about!

I had my midwife apt today.. all went well, small amount of protein in my wee.
I said that obviously and I am 18 weeks on Saturday and still no major movements.. we had a listen in and baby is happy..
Placenta is more than likely anterior still..

I also had my scan today and they confirmed it's a girl - I didn't believe it after the gender scan but am going to trust the experts now 🥰 I just realised it's now no more than 4 weeks between appointments - time is going to fly by!!

Thanks everyone, I have indeed hit the jackpot and feel incredibly lucky with the whole experience so far.

@excitedmama I hear you, and in my view people are allowed to feel what they feel, there is space for any and all feelings and it sounds like grief for the future you had imagined - I would say express it and feel all the feelings rather than stuffing it down or beating yourself up for having those feelings. I was half- dreading seeing two boys at the scan as I always imagined having a girl. one reason why i decided to find out so I could process the outcome before birth.

@crazycowlady - yes, girl is on left with posterior placenta so Im probably feeling her movements most of the time. at the scan the boy was kind of stacked on top of her (they were both head down snuggled in together, so cute!) so maybe I can feel him if he moves over but cant tell the difference hehe.

I'm still wearing my normal low waisted jeans but without a belt so will see how long they last before I size up or get maternity ones or just leggings. I bought a few tops in the next size up and tanks that are longer and theyre great, I have preferred loose clothing for ages now so some of my jumpers still fit. My pyjama tops are too small now though so gonna get some mens t-shirts to wear, hehe as I dont like nighties, and dont bother wearing anything feminine in bed. Trying to avoid buying too much specific maternity stuff as this is likely to be my only pregnancy.

I had my 20 week scan today. Everything looks good, but baby wouldn't cooperate, so the tech couldn't get all the images of the heart and kidneys she needed...so I have to go back for another one in 2 weeks