NOVEMBER 07 - Part 2 and we're blooming !

[purplepants]

well, I hope we are anyway. I just feel blooming huge!. My beloved white linen trousers split right up my backside last night

Ah, you Uk teachers may get the rest of the school year off as I believe you get 9 months paid maternity leave now. Here in NZ we get 14 weeks and until about 5 years ago there was...none, yes, that's right, no paid leave at all!

No child benefit either, so next time someone tells you how bad benefits etc have got in UK, believe me, it's better than many places

I'm not a teacher! I'm a legal secretary so cant wait to have a few months off!

Oh and i've put a couple more pics up on my profile.

14 weeks! That's outrageous. I always thought NZ was a forward-thinking place - one of my best friends is a Kiwi and has told me this, another moved to NZ a couple of years back, she's expecting her first baby in August. I know we are pretty lucky in the UK. I don't think I've ever had cause to complain about maternity rights at work, my employer has always been brilliant too.

BTW my dd's favourite book is Santa's Kiwi Holiday, don't know if you know it Anna, but it's well worth a read. I read it 3 times a day at least...At least she's not old enough to demand to visit all the places mentioned in the book, she'll have to make do with Staffordshire this year!

It is forward thinking in some ways and not so much in others. It's a poorer country than the UK and I hitnk they just can't afford as many benefits. We pay for visits to GP as well - about 15-20 quid a time (though it's free while pg). Though you do get to see your GP the same day, I remember when living in Leeds having to wait up to 7 days to get a appointment. And I never feel rushed at GP's, feel he/she can give you as much time as you need to discuss whatever you're there for - no "quick, write a prescription and get them out of here".

NZ very lovely in many othr ways though, don't want to sound like whinging Pom! I haven't read "Santa's Kiwi holiday" but Hairy Maclairy made a lot more sense once I got here (it's written by a Kiwi) - a dairy is a corner shop here. I always wondered why this dog lived in a dairy with a load of cows...

Jet _ I'm having a baby in Nov c'os that was the earliest I could have one and be eligible for full maternity pay. I work 3 days a week; it's 4 weeks till hols - then 6 weeks untill half term. The I'm OFF. That's only 30 more working days

Anna - your maternity provision sounds shocking. I spent 3 months in NZ a couple of years ago. I loved it - especially Otago and the way they call the stuff in Crunchie bars hokey pokey oh and the pies...

just got home from a wedding, where I discovered that my cousin is 34 weeks pregnant and my aunt is 12 weeks pregnant. So there was a few bumps there

littleoldme i'm glad i'm not the only one counting days till I finish work! I tHink I probably have 34 days left. must get that mnaternity pay form filled in and sent off.

I don't know what I'm eligible for pay wise. I don't think I'll get SMP as I haven't earned over the limit every week for the last 26 weeks. I think it may be Maternity Allowance- at least I hope it's Maternity Allowance. I have worked for the last year- just on a supply basis- I've worked half a day every week since October and then some weeks have worked a lot more than that but oter weeks all I worked was the half a day

I used to be like you two - littleoldme and Anna - counting the days until I could stop working.

2 years later I am now counting the days until I can start again!

I must admit I was going a bit stir crazy but now have started working as a freelance bridal henna artist so am getting out and about more.

Fits around my DS very well as it's evening work mainly.

Will probably wait till this baby is 9 months before going back to a 9-5.

I know it's a bit early to decide but when does everyone think they will go back to work after babies arrive?

It's not so much that I can't wait to stop working; it's more that the end of November seemed like ages away until I thought about work days.

I've spent the last three days with horrid pelvic pain driving me to tears and this morning I feel better Much relieved.

Pixie - re your maternity entitlement- a freind of mine used to work for Citizen's Advice and deal with this stuff all the time. If you hit a wall it might be worth contacting them.

Choudru - will def go back to work when baby arrives - probably in September. I think I'll nedd non babay related adult conversation aprt from anythng else.

Must go and do some some shopping before the mother descends.

morning everyone,

• ooh littleoldme, sounds awful, glad you're feeling better.

choudru, sounds a lovely freelance job! i'm trying to think of freelance things i could do after the baby's born as i currently commute 140 miles/day to work. it's crucifying, even when i wasn't pregnant!!

i think if i can scrape by i'd like to take a year but will depend on the money situation really.

Poor you littleoldme - pain reducing you to tears sounds above and beyond the call of pregnancy duty. You any the wiser about whether it's SPD?

Ara - I must admit it fits perfectly with having a 2 year old and expecting a baby. My previous job was as a network engineer and I travelled all over the UK. Loved it then because I hate working behind a desk all day. But it's definitely not compatable with being a mum of young children.

I've always thought that maternity leave was a good opportunity to step back from your career and reassess whether you want to stay in it or do something different.

I wouldn't advise starting a business while pregnant to everyone but I must admit it has given me something else to concentrate on apart from the pregnancy and helps out financially. Being a SAHM for the past 2 years has not come without financial sacrifice!

Have heard so many stories of women who go all entreprenurial (sp?) once they have a baby. If you can't find a job that gives you a good wage and flexibility - then you have to create one!

Updated scan list:

purplepants - due 5 Nov, SURPRISE
FCH - due 1 Nov, SURPRISE
Choudru - due 2nd Nov, LITTLE GIRL
Annainnz - due 6th Nov, LITTLE GIRL
MrsJ - due 10 Nov, scan 22 June
Tonysmum - due 6 Nov, SURPRISE
Pixiefish- due 8th Nov, SECRET
Sparklygothkat-due 8th Nov, scan 25 June
Jetgirl - due Nov 11th - scan June 25th
GeekInPigtails - due 4th Nov, scan 25th June
pinklady 82 - due Nov 4th, scan 27th june
GermanGal - due 9th Nov, scan 27th June
NYKate-due 9th Nov, scan 2nd July
Easywriter - due 11th Nov, scan 2nd July
Mimi - due 11 Nov, scan 3 July
Mrss2006 - due 17 Nov, scanned 14 May (no more scans)
Bearus - due 21st Nov, Scan 11th July
Littleoldme - due Nov 28th - scan July 12
RGPargy - due 27 Nov, scan w/b 23 July
Loopymumsy - due 30th Nov, no scan dates yet as hospital are rubbish!
Ara - due 24th Nov, scanned 1st June

I think MrsJ said she would let us know in August.

Good luck to you all for tomorrow Sparkly, Jetgirl and GeekinPiggtails. Another busy day for our thread.

Will be sending positive vibes your way!

Yes, I keep hearing great stories of women starting really successful businesses from home - good for them! really impressive,but i'm not sure i've got that much of a great business brain (!).
I'm really looking forward to the time away from work - I'm struggling with them at the moment for one office day working from home per week so i don't have to drive the full 700 miles every week. It's so frustrating - you'd think they'd recognise that if i'm not so utterly exhausted I'd have a lot more energy for the actual job!!

ooh, good luck everyone. let us know if you're going to find out the flavour or whether you're leaving it as a surprise!!

Morning Everyone!

Littleoldme - glad you're feeling better! Feels like the baby is bouncing around on my bladder today and it's so uncomfortable!

Choudru - Wow, what a fantastic job! Am i right to think that it's mainly the Asian communities that have henna done for their weddings? It always looks so beautiful and intricate.

I'm going to be giving up work at the end of October (all going well) and intend to take my full 9 months off. I'll only get maternity pay, but at least DP will be working so it wont be so bad. I intend to go back to work 2 days a week, mainly to keep my sanity, but also to keep me up with the technology and to bring a bit of extra cash in. My firm (American law firm) seem really flexible with part time workers as we have quite a few of them. The only thing i'm not looking forward to is the prospect of losing the people i work for and having to be a float again, because it might not be possible to get someone else to jobshare with me. My bosses are all lovely tho so i'm hoping that someone will be willing to work 3 days for them so that i can work the 2 days for them!

I have to say that DP is really looking forward to me giving up work because he loves it when i'm at home. I dont normally get home from work til about 7pm so we're always eating late and our evenings just fly because there's not much time left. The idea of being fed and watered by 6pm is very appealing - we'll have the whole evening to do what we like! Yay!!!

Sorry for the long message!!

And good luck for tomorrow everyone!!

Morning RGPargy!

Job share sounds good to me too! Have you spoken to them about it at all or are you going to wait till you're due back at work?

Ara - for so much commuting, I think you should be cheeky and push for another day at home once you get more pregnant.

My friend had similar issues - her boss kept telling her how well she was looking and how she wasn't letting the pregnancy affect her work. Basically tried to cleverly put her in the frame of mind that she felt she couldn't ask for them to make allowances for her pregnancy.

She eventually did push them and got them to agree to a day working from home a week. Then as she got more pregnant, she basically started sneaking in more WFH days by ringing in saying she wasn't feeling well or she had a MW appointment etc. So she wasn't taking time off but she got to work from home more often.

Ara - sometimes you have to be cheeky. Put it this way - the male senior managers at your work would demand a lot better for the mothers of thier children.

Why should you settle for less?

Sorry about the rant but it really winds me up

RG - yes it is mainly asian brides who have the henna applied for their weddings. But have been getting enquiries from all sorts of people. One local teacher (teachers seem to be taking over this thread!) has asked me to run 90 min workshops for 11-14 year olds telling them all about the art of henna and getting them to have a go.

May have to pick all you teachers' brains to know how to pitch it. Am only used to giving presentations to hairy-@rsed engineers

Also did a group of girls the other day who were having a bollywood party.

Actually some women have patterns painted on their pregnant bellies - some great photos on t'internet!

RG you're work sound very accomodating. That's one less thing to stress about!

Loopy - although I barely know you - I could so see you as a MW. You seem to take a personal interest in everyone's birth dilemmas and always have great advice to give.

Very different from the armed forces!!!!

Isn't it interesting what a cross section of professions/ex-professions we have?!

Yes, it's frustrating... I asked them about this immediately - ie, as my pregnancy goes on i'll have to try and arrange some home working as i am exhausted as it is. The response to that wasn't great - similar to your friend, and then saying that i wouldn't be eligible for anything like that till about 7.5 months! They also dropped in that a colleague had commuted till she was almost full term and she didn't exactly live 10 minutes doan the road! I nearly wet myself when they said that...the person they were talking about has around a half hour commute (!) -mines 1.5 hrs each way and i have to get up at 5.30 every day to try and avoid the rush hour. they must think i'm made of steel or something!!!!
Loopymumsy - moving TWICE! ah you poor thing - I can't wait to get things moving at this end but dreading the actual move. going to the parentals sounds like a good idea!!

choudru - you should get in touch with the arts development section at you local council. you could probably join a bank of artists for community/school workshops --the pay for this is pretty good - with us it's over £20/hour so you're looking at a couple of hundred quid for a full day!

Ara - you're a genius! Thanks for the tip - just had a quick look at the internet. Will make some calls next week and see what comes up

About work -

It's the oldest trick in the book making you feel like you're being demanding because another colleague didn't demand the same.

Don't let them pressure you - getting up at 5.30 everyday is not good for that baby of your's

My boss was the ONLY one who didn't look happy for me when I told him I was pregnant. He must have had his 3 children delivered by stork I guess?!

Yes, they're a pain in the neck....when i think of how often i go beyond the call of duty for them it actually makes my blood boil!! Ah well...

Good luck with making contact with the Arts Dev lot - you should be able to download documents from the webpages telling you what their priorities are (eg antisocial behavious, diversionary activities etc) which might help you tailor what you offer to fit in with what they are looking for. Let me know how you get on!